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vampirism
Stranger
Registered: 03/14/04
Posts: 8,120
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I
#1756115 - 07/28/03 12:26 PM (20 years, 8 months ago) |
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want to die. why? every month as I approach a full moon, I become more depressed and suicidal.. a full moon is the apex of my depression. as it moves toward a black moon (? what is it when the moon is all dark?), I feel better...
oh, and I'm an extremely extremely extremely distracted person. Will someone hear offer a diagnosis?
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vampirism
Stranger
Registered: 03/14/04
Posts: 8,120
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Re: I [Re: ]
#1756118 - 07/28/03 12:28 PM (20 years, 8 months ago) |
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hahahaha I just checked the current moon phase- its a completely black moon!! but I havent been feeling better!! this hasnt happened before!?? what does this mean? Will something apocalyptic happen to me august 27th- when mars is extremely extremely close- considering how sensitive I am to funky celestial stuff edit: very interesting. I just checked the moon phases for september 1st and september 15th 2001 september 1st was a full moon- and it was my first time on shrooms september 15, 2 weeks later, was as such a no moon- it was my last trip- and a very bad one at that very very interesting..
Edited by Morrowind (07/28/03 12:33 PM)
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MOTH
Wild Woman
Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
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Re: I [Re: ]
#1756973 - 07/28/03 05:31 PM (20 years, 8 months ago) |
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You're not the only one who feels out of sorts on the full moon. Do you know that studies have shown that crime actually rises on the full moon? Its really interesting...I know I always feel full of it on the full moon though, and happy. But yeah, not seeing a moon in the sky is pretty depressing.
-Shade
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neutralizer
Spiritual beinghaving a Humanexperience
Registered: 06/17/03
Posts: 635
Loc: This Planet Earth
Last seen: 17 years, 1 month
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Re: I [Re: MOTH]
#1756976 - 07/28/03 05:33 PM (20 years, 8 months ago) |
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My mom works in a hospital, and says that during a full moon the ER gets much busier than usual.
-------------------- There are things known, and there are things unknown, and in between are the doors - Morrison
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pattern
multiplayer
Registered: 07/19/02
Posts: 2,185
Loc: Canada
Last seen: 4 years, 15 days
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Re: I [Re: ]
#1757674 - 07/28/03 09:30 PM (20 years, 8 months ago) |
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Quote:
want to die. why? every month as I approach a full moon, I become more depressed and suicidal.. a full moon is the apex of my depression. as it moves toward a black moon (? what is it when the moon is all dark?), I feel better... oh, and I'm an extremely extremely extremely distracted person. Will someone hear offer a diagnosis?
Why are you so depressed? What are you missing in life?
-------------------- man = monkey + mushroom
Edited by pattern (07/29/03 11:05 PM)
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Strumpling
Neuronaut
Registered: 10/11/02
Posts: 7,571
Loc: Hyperspace
Last seen: 12 years, 10 months
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Re: I [Re: ]
#1759271 - 07/29/03 10:12 AM (20 years, 7 months ago) |
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Its a good idea to start feeling good about yourself - you're going to be around for quite some time, so you might as well have a good time with this human experience.
If you're finding it impossible to feel good about yourself, then you are moving the wrong direction in life
OF COURSE, THIS IS JUST MY OPINION... I'M NO DOCTOR good luck and peace
-------------------- Insert an "I think" mentally in front of eveything I say that seems sketchy, because I certainly don't KNOW much. Also; feel free to yell at me. In addition: SHPONGLE
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RebelSteve33
Amateur Mycologist
Registered: 05/28/02
Posts: 3,774
Loc: Arizona
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Re: I [Re: ]
#1759354 - 07/29/03 10:57 AM (20 years, 7 months ago) |
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Hey man... I'm not trying to be rude here, but I just wanted to state my opinion on something...
The moon and the planets are just huge bodies of matter floating through space. They have no influence over you.
But you have influence over your own self--a bigger influence than anything else could ever have, when you get down to it.
If you want to die, then something is wrong with you or your life right now, and you need to get it fixed because the primary instinct of any living creature is to survive.
And life is definitely worth the fight for survival if you can just open your eyes up to all that is beautiful in the world. There is beauty everywhere. Find it!
I don't know what's wrong with you, so I can't offer any suggestions on how you might help yourself. You have that knowledge, though, and you have the power to look within yourself and at your life and figure out how to put right what is wrong.
Don't blame the moon, or mars. You have much more power over yourself than those heavenly bodies will ever have.
Peace, and Good Luck!
-RebelSteve
-------------------- Namaste.
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vampirism
Stranger
Registered: 03/14/04
Posts: 8,120
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sadly, I don't think you're quite right. It's in my power to overcome my body's reactions to celestial influence, but there *is* something to overcome. I don't have the will to attempt it
and
my mind keeps *blinking* whenever I try to think of my life.. the very fact that I'm alive, that I have flesh and thoughts- "scares" me. I'm simply allergic to life. yup. that must be it
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Zero7a1
Leaving YourWasteland
Registered: 10/23/02
Posts: 3,594
Loc: Passing Cloud
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Re: I [Re: ]
#1759557 - 07/29/03 12:50 PM (20 years, 7 months ago) |
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dude. Im serisous that sounds like a lot of shit thats been going on with me lately. And honestly when i blink im just like "wtf". Okay i dont know a damn thing about whats going on. But i remember the feelings i get. sometimes those completely empty hollow feelings inside that dont escape. Scream like wraiths. I know what those sounds are like, i know how you get when you feel like your just dwindling down. But as i was taught in my dreams... i learned to SCREAM. Louder than the cries of my depression. Find your voice. dont be a slave to your swirling chemicals.
The sadest thing for me and you is that there might be no diagnosis. The prognosis is that of our thought process's. To feel good about ourselves. To believe that we can jump higher, we can dream further than our eyes can see. So we have somethign to carry us.
Stay strong, like trees in the ground, when the water cries from out of the sky, burry your roots into your foundation. Hold on to that land, as if its all you have. For in fact it is your source, and there you can decide where you want to go. YOu can face your celestial counterparts... Just hold fast, and look towards the sky. Balance yourself. I hope that makes sense. -------- FYI. use the buddy system if you need to . Dont be afraid
-------------------- What?
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Jared
Stranger
Registered: 04/22/01
Posts: 8,783
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Re: I [Re: MOTH]
#1759766 - 07/29/03 02:15 PM (20 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
Do you know that studies have shown that crime actually rises on the full moon?
Could this be because criminals plan their crimes around the time when natural light is best, so they can leave their flashlights at home? Just a thought.
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vampirism
Stranger
Registered: 03/14/04
Posts: 8,120
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Re: I [Re: Jared]
#1759872 - 07/29/03 02:43 PM (20 years, 7 months ago) |
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i doubt it did you know the origins of the word lunatic come from luna- the word for moon?
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hawk
Stranger
Registered: 01/30/03
Posts: 275
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Re: I [Re: ]
#1760274 - 07/29/03 04:46 PM (20 years, 7 months ago) |
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Well me know the moon controls the tides. We also know that women's menstrual cycle's are 28 days, the same as that of the moons. Coral spawn during the full moon,, It is obvious that it has some gravitational effect on the planet, so why could it not have influence on peoples brain chemistry. If something so simple as a change in ones altitude can alter body functions, Then a moderate gravitational pull from the moon could produce some of these latent side effects..
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vampirism
Stranger
Registered: 03/14/04
Posts: 8,120
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Re: I [Re: hawk]
#1760315 - 07/29/03 05:05 PM (20 years, 7 months ago) |
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yes and it is my theory that particular humans with low resistence to such change are lunatics- in the full true sense of the word.
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MOTH
Wild Woman
Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
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Re: I [Re: ]
#1760894 - 07/29/03 08:01 PM (20 years, 7 months ago) |
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"Could this be because criminals plan their crimes around the time when natural light is best, so they can leave their flashlights at home?"
Even then, cloud cover can spoil it, and why bother with light if you are doing your dirty work in a big city that has 24 hour street lamps? I can always see perfectly fine at night where I live.
Morrowind, I sort of know what you are saying now. When I was little, I used to sit in my room on the floor and get completely overwelmed with 'something'...I would just lay there and my breathing would get tense as I thought over and over again..."Its hard to believe I'm alive...Its hard to believe I'm alive..there is just something...something..something..."
Its weird to explain, but the sensations I felt was that everything was just small and tiny. I was meaningless and a pale husk..."Who would I be if I wasn't me?" I would think. "How can I know I am alive? What is this? What is this? What am I? What am I?"
Repeated over and over, I would say these things until I felt the strangest feeling sweep over me...as if in my little child mind I felt the futility of life dissolve who I was...and that I was never anyone. I could never grasp "what" this was. Even now I feel those old strange feelings rush over me.
This may not exactly what you were talking about, but I thought I'd share my experiences with the meaningless 'something' that I felt crushing me so long ago. I don't know if this was because of the moons or not.
It didn't bring depression in me though...just wailing confusion and the inability to comprehend what I was feeling. What does this sound like to all of you?
-Shade
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Darkcloud
tiwkcuFtsilihiN
Registered: 04/06/03
Posts: 1,331
Loc: USA
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Re: Werewolf Fantasies [Re: ]
#1761461 - 07/29/03 11:22 PM (20 years, 7 months ago) |
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Lunatic- - 1) Suffering from lunacy; insane.
- 2) A person affected by lunacy; an insane person, esp. one who has lucid intervals; a madman; a person of unsound mind.
- 3) Some insane and believed to be affected by the phases of the moon [syn: moonstruck]
Moonstruck- - 1) Dazed or distracted with romantic sentiment.
- 2) Affected by insanity; crazed.
- 3) Mentally affected or deranged by the supposed influence of the moon; lunatic.
I'm only subject to 1,2, and 3 but here's number 4 for you... - 4) Made sick by the supposed influence of the moon, as a human being.
I love all stages of the moon...especially the full moon. I think it's a subconscious type of deal, though.
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Strumpling
Neuronaut
Registered: 10/11/02
Posts: 7,571
Loc: Hyperspace
Last seen: 12 years, 10 months
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Re: I [Re: ]
#1761617 - 07/30/03 12:38 AM (20 years, 7 months ago) |
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"the very fact that I'm alive, that I have flesh and thoughts- 'scares' me."
I think many of us go through something like this for a while..... "They" forget to mention these types of feelings and issues while "Educating" us.
-------------------- Insert an "I think" mentally in front of eveything I say that seems sketchy, because I certainly don't KNOW much. Also; feel free to yell at me. In addition: SHPONGLE
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