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Getting in touch - Focus - Determination
    #1711358 - 07/13/03 02:21 PM (13 years, 7 months ago)

I thought I'd just share some thoughts with you all.

As some of you know I had a pretty crazy mushroom experience on the 4th, and since then I have not touched a drug. 

This weekend I went to a little hippy festival in northern Maine.  I had a test of my determination.  I was surrounded by pot smoking.  I had good blotter acid and bags of mushrooms thrown right under my nose.  It seemed like my whole body was begging to imbibe, but I listened to that voice inside of me and turned away from all of it. 

I felt great being their all weekend and choosing not to escape my grounded state of consciousness.  It felt like a very real accomplishment.

Me and some good people I went with camped in a secluded area away from the party.  There were many drunk and drugged people at the party area going wild.  I have nothing against them, but I choose not to be around that sort of environment.  I feel like it is a waste of my time.

I just enjoyed the camping experience, and a nice vacation from home which I'll take any time to allow me to think about things from a fresh perspective.

I went to the party once to participate in a feroscious bout of drum circling.  I pounded on a djembe for what seemed like hours, and met a couple nice mellow people. 

It felt good because I let these events happen as they did,  I did not go there hoping to find something, I went there to be myself.

I also got to man an overhead projector thing that was displaying a lightshow for the bands.  That was fun.. I wish there had been better music though. 
There was one awesome sounding instrumental metalish band that I heard from my tent but by the time I got over there, they had stopped playing and I didn't know who they were... 

I also brought my college studies with me as well.  I have an American History class and I was reading about this indian named 'Black Elk', who witnessed the colonial whites murder hundreds of indian women and children at Wounded Knee.  I was filled with a very sober and real rage for the kind of ignorance I know runs rampant in this world.

I walked down this long ATV trail with my headphones on, picked alot of blueberries, walked more.  It was very relaxing.

I barely caught a whiff of the social anxiety that seems to stalk me at these sort of events.  I feel alot more connected to myself and on some sort of path.  I don't feel lost anymore.

Day 8 without any drugs
I feel great :smile:


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InvisiblethePatient
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Re: Getting in touch - Focus - Determination [Re: Grav]
    #1711508 - 07/13/03 03:25 PM (13 years, 7 months ago)

I went to the party once to participate in a feroscious bout of drum circling. I pounded on a djembe for what seemed like hours, and met a couple nice mellow people.

i feel very strongly about drumming. Hand drumming seems more useful to me because my feet dont usually cooperate with the brainwaves that are sent its way.

Drumming has a way of relaxing you, and letting you feel intouch with whats around you. Especially in drum circles, where it seems that everyone is connected for what, may only be minutes but to my perception, seems like hours.

Maybe one day we can get together and have a drum circle of our own.  :grin:   


--------------------
T h e r e  a r e  n o  o r d i n a r y  m o m e n t s.


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Re: Getting in touch - Focus - Determination [Re: thePatient]
    #1711893 - 07/13/03 06:09 PM (13 years, 7 months ago)

Yea I would look up every now and then and see other people drumming staring right at me and you could tell we were locked into each other, even with the immense noise and distraction of a hundred drunkards around us.


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General Interest >> Philosophy, Sociology & Psychology

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