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InvisibleRebelSteve33
Amateur Mycologist
Male

Registered: 05/28/02
Posts: 3,774
Loc: Arizona
A little advice on my roommate situation, please!
    #1662242 - 06/25/03 07:34 PM (14 years, 1 month ago)

Hello everyone!  :smile:

Well, last year at school I lived with my best friend, Shannon, who is a girl.  We get along together very well, but we are nothing more than best friends.

The thing is, Shannon has a boyfriend, and he is a little jealous of how well Shannon and I get along.  To be honest, I really feel that Shannon and I have a better relationship than she and her boyfriend do--the only difference being our lack of any sort of sexual contact.

And I can tell that, although he tries to hide it, her boyfriend doesn't like this at all.  A lot of times when he is around, I'll actually kinda remain distant from Shannon to avoid any ill feelings with him.

The thing is, I think her boyfriend is a good guy.  I'd like to be friends with him, but the jealousy issue on his part makes it really hard.  Whenever he comes over, he usually just says hi to me and then goes in the other room with Shannon, leaving me feeling very secluded.

Anyway...

Shannon and I will be living together again next year, and I know the situation is going to continue and possibly get worse.  I hate having to distance myself from Shannon when he is around.  I just want to be friends with him and not have to act differently with Shannon when he is over.

He knows that Shannon and I would never do anything sexual together or even kiss at all.  I think he's just jealous that she and I get along better than he and she do.  (They always bicker and fight, and make each other upset, whereas Shannon and I never fight and are always laughing and having a good time together).

Sorry it took so long to explain this situation... I hope I did an okay job with explaining it because it is kind of an odd one.  Does anyone have any suggestions on how I can remedy the problem?  They would be greatly appreciated! :smile:

Peace,

RebelSteve   


--------------------
Namaste.


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OfflineDailyPot
Trip'n Time

Registered: 11/17/02
Posts: 2,207
Loc: Florida
Last seen: 11 years, 5 months
Re: A little advice on my roommate situation, please! [Re: RebelSteve33]
    #1662453 - 06/25/03 08:44 PM (14 years, 1 month ago)

Talk to the guy one day. I suggest, although its probably a bad suggestion, getting a good alcohol buzz and talking to him like when you expect him over. Offer him some and go I need to tell you something, you'll have a loose tonge and have no trouble saying what you want to :smirk:


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InvisibleRebelSteve33
Amateur Mycologist
Male

Registered: 05/28/02
Posts: 3,774
Loc: Arizona
Re: A little advice on my roommate situation, please! [Re: DailyPot]
    #1662516 - 06/25/03 09:02 PM (14 years, 1 month ago)

Thanks, that is a good idea! I have some trouble confronting people face-to-face about issues sometimes, so a little alcohol would probably help me out.

I guess talking to him is the best solution to the problem, but what exactly do I say????

"Hey, um, I know you're jealous of me and Shannon b/c we get along better than the two of you do, but please don't be b/c you're a nice guy and I just want to be your friend."

Haha... I'm just really not good at talking to people in person. Any other suggestions or ideas on what exactly I should say? Should I maybe just try to distance myself from Shannon and let her get on with her life with her boyfriend?? It would suck b/c she's such a great friend, but I don't want to cause any problems between her and her lover, and maybe it would be the best thing to ease the tension between me and him.


--------------------
Namaste.


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InvisibleFungushungry
Addict

Registered: 07/17/02
Posts: 2,014
Loc: Whispering Winds
Re: A little advice on my roommate situation, please! [Re: RebelSteve33]
    #1662913 - 06/26/03 03:46 AM (14 years, 1 month ago)

Tell Shannon to lose the bf if there always fighting... ill pick up his slack :smile: and you would have a shroomerite always around :P

Hell we could go mushroom hunting everyday.. hook a brother up :smile:


--------------------
"Early man walked away
As modernman took control
There mind's weren't all the same
And to conquer was their goal
So he built his great empire
And he slaughtered his own kind
He died a confused man
And killed himself in his own mind"


Edited by Fungushungry (07/25/03 11:53 PM)


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InvisibleRebelSteve33
Amateur Mycologist
Male

Registered: 05/28/02
Posts: 3,774
Loc: Arizona
Re: A little advice on my roommate situation, please! [Re: Fungushungry]
    #1663100 - 06/26/03 03:46 AM (14 years, 1 month ago)

LOL, that would be sweet, dude!

I wish Shannon would lose the boyfriend. She annoys me sometimes b/c one day she will say how she's thinking about dumping him and the next day they will have sex and everything will be fine again. I hate stupid shit like that.

It would be cool for you to be my roommate, but we've only got a 2 bedroom place for next year and it is pretty small.

Peace, bro!

-RebelSteve


--------------------
Namaste.


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InvisibleFungushungry
Addict

Registered: 07/17/02
Posts: 2,014
Loc: Whispering Winds
Re: A little advice on my roommate situation, please! [Re: RebelSteve33]
    #1663167 - 06/26/03 03:46 AM (14 years, 1 month ago)

Well you could always have someone to kill him for ya.. and i could be the rebound :smile:


--------------------
"Early man walked away
As modernman took control
There mind's weren't all the same
And to conquer was their goal
So he built his great empire
And he slaughtered his own kind
He died a confused man
And killed himself in his own mind"


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InvisibleRebelSteve33
Amateur Mycologist
Male

Registered: 05/28/02
Posts: 3,774
Loc: Arizona
Re: A little advice on my roommate situation, please! [Re: Fungushungry]
    #1663210 - 06/26/03 03:46 AM (14 years, 1 month ago)

LOL!

Murder's not my thing...

Besides, I think that having her boyfriend die would make Shannon severely depressed, and I just couldn't do that to the poor gal! :crazy:

Since I'm bored, here is a pic of Shannon and I dancing during a party we had at our apartment last semester:



Aint she beautiful??? :laugh:
 


--------------------
Namaste.


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InvisibleArmFromTheAbyss
Old Hand

Registered: 10/09/02
Posts: 1,364
Loc: Down here in Babylon
Re: A little advice on my roommate situation, please! [Re: RebelSteve33]
    #1663424 - 06/26/03 03:46 AM (14 years, 1 month ago)

Personally, I think you should not give a fuck what her bf thinks because you have no sexual attraction to her and just want to be friends. Dumb bf's will pass but friendship are  :nut: :bong: :tongue2: :lol: strong.   


--------------------


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InvisibletrendalM
King of Asides
Male User Gallery

Registered: 04/17/01
Posts: 19,930
Loc: Ontario, Canada
Re: A little advice on my roommate situation, please! [Re: RebelSteve33]
    #1664266 - 06/26/03 01:16 PM (14 years, 1 month ago)

Definately talk to him about it. Try asking him if he doesn't like you or something. If he says no then come right out and ask him if he's jealous of you and Shannon's friendship.


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OfflineDailyPot
Trip'n Time

Registered: 11/17/02
Posts: 2,207
Loc: Florida
Last seen: 11 years, 5 months
Re: A little advice on my roommate situation, please! [Re: RebelSteve33]
    #1664279 - 06/26/03 01:22 PM (14 years, 1 month ago)

Quote:

RebelSteve33 said:
Thanks, that is a good idea!  I have some trouble confronting people face-to-face about issues sometimes, so a little alcohol would probably help me out.

I guess talking to him is the best solution to the problem, but what exactly do I say????

"Hey, um, I know you're jealous of me and Shannon b/c we get along better than the two of you do, but please don't be b/c you're a nice guy and I just want to be your friend."

Haha... I'm just really not good at talking to people in person.  Any other suggestions or ideas on what exactly I should say?  Should I maybe just try to distance myself from Shannon and let her get on with her life with her boyfriend??  It would suck b/c she's such a great friend, but I don't want to cause any problems between her and her lover, and maybe it would be the best thing to ease the tension between me and him.   



I sometimes have touble just saying what I have to say, afew drinks in a situation like that is priceless :wink:

Dont say you and his g/f get along better than they do! Stay way from this, you may feel this is true, maybe he even does, but no good can come from saying it! Just be like:

ok, i've been wanting to tell you this for awhile but i'm too pussy lol, i think you and your g/f are cool people, i like both of you, but neither one sexually. i've always felt that theres been tension between us since i'm a guy and i live w/ her, naturally you probably feel abit weird about this, but i just wanted to let you know you have nothing to worry about, we're nothing but friends and i just want things to be cool between us, ok?

Then shake his hand and offer him a drink. Hows that sound?

Dont distant yourself from Shannon, theres no point. Do either one of them know you're gay?

Quote:

RebelSteve33 said:
Aint she beautiful??? :laugh: 



Actully yes :thumbup: Can I come over with afew bottles of booze? :cool:


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Invisiblesir tripsalot
Administrator
 Arcade Champion: Skeleton Park

Registered: 07/10/99
Posts: 6,486
Re: A little advice on my roommate situation, please! [Re: RebelSteve33]
    #1664747 - 06/26/03 04:32 PM (14 years, 1 month ago)

Just tell him that you like him(as a friend or whatever) and that you feel awkward when he comes over and you don't know why, telling or suggesting he is jealous wil make him defensive and may even be enough reason for him to dislike you.
This may be out of his hands though if he is getting grief from his buddies or something that he allows his GF to live with a guy.


--------------------

"Little racoons and old possums 'n' stuff all live up in here. They've got to have a little place to sit." Bob Ross.


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