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XUL
OTD Janitor



Registered: 03/16/05
Posts: 28,261
Loc: America
Last seen: 4 years, 3 months
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Am I overreacting?
#15978570 - 03/21/12 09:48 PM (11 years, 11 months ago) |
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So I planned this trip with 3 of my good friends. We are going to go south and hang out before I leave for the Navy. I told everybody that I will cover the costs except for the food and beer. I told everybody about this trip 4 months in advance and they all wanted to go.
Well, a week ago I call my friend and he tells me that he cant wait to go on the trip and its going to be so much fun. Tonight he calls me and tells me that he can not go because he asked for overtime last night and the boss scheduled him overtime on the days we were supposed to go.
I mean.. Is that a total dick move on his part or what? I wanted to bring my friends on a trip and now I cant fill his seat a week before the trip. I hung up on the ass and I dont even know what to say I am so pissed. He tried to call me back and I just ignored it.
I am a reasonable guy but I am tired of playing the nice guy all the time and getting fucked over like an vagina.
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TRUMP 2020
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Eminence



Registered: 07/25/10
Posts: 16,627
Loc: Richmond, VA
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Re: Am I overreacting? [Re: XUL]
#15978594 - 03/21/12 09:53 PM (11 years, 11 months ago) |
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Well I mean it's not like he wanted to get overtime on the days you were gonna hang out I'm sure. 
That's probably what he was going to tell you before you hung up and ignored him. 
So yeah, I could understand your frustration but you probably did overreact just a little bit though.
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trip forever
Stranger


Registered: 08/21/09
Posts: 5,873
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Re: Am I overreacting? [Re: XUL]
#15978596 - 03/21/12 09:53 PM (11 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
XUL said: So the other day I went to visit my friends up at my old college town. My friend said he was getting a 5,000 dollar tax return (he got it on the 23rd). We are going on a trip together at the end of March and after that I am leaving to the Navy. I told him my dad was going to get rid of my car for me while I was gone. He then told me he would like to buy it. I asked him are you serious? He says yes, very serious. He said he would buy it after our trip and take it back to his home.
The 3 days ago I called him and asked him if he would be interested in buying it sooner because I found another car I would like to buy. He said absolutely. I asked him if it would be cool if I possibly brought it up to him in a couple days and gave it to him. He said that would be great.
After we had that conversation I sat down with the lady who has a car I want. We set up the deal. I was going to take the money my friend gave me on top of some of my own money and buy her car.
So tonight I call my friend and tell him everything is in place and that I will bring the car up to him on Tuesday. He says... Yea.. cool man... *pause*. I ask whats wrong and if its still on. He said
yea everything is still good. Then we get to talking and eventually he tells me he is not sure if he wants my car. He said he would let me know tomorrow.
Now, this is all AFTER he told me to my face and on the phone that he wanted it. He is my friend
and it seems to me like he is treating me like a jackass. Like he doesnt care what plans I have or what arrangements I made. So much that he will back out on the deal a DAY before I have arranged to pay the lady. Its an insult to me.
I wouldnt have cared if he had said... I am not sure about the buy yet man or... I might buy it but I need time. But no, he was like. YEA! I want that car man! Ill take it!
Am I overreacting...?
Because if he doesnt buy my car I am going to let him know how fucking jacked I am. Hell, I dont even want to talk to the guy again I am so jacked.
If it's the same dude, then yes, because you should have expected this.
If it's not, then no, but I would advise better friends.
You should've explained why you were mad and not hung up on him and ask him to not do this again, regardless.
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wrestler_az
PsiLLy BiLLy



Registered: 08/11/02
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Re: Am I overreacting? [Re: XUL]
#15978600 - 03/21/12 09:53 PM (11 years, 11 months ago) |
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yes, you are overreacting.
-------------------- how's your WOW?
Edited by yageman (04/20/06 4:20 PM)
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All We Perceive
Sea Cucumber



Registered: 09/24/07
Posts: 10,491
Last seen: 8 months, 6 days
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Re: Am I overreacting? [Re: XUL]
#15978613 - 03/21/12 09:55 PM (11 years, 11 months ago) |
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Sounds like you overreacted to me. People are flaky and give bullshit fucking excuses all the time. Not showing up to your going away party is pretty un-friendlike but I would just turn the other cheek. You have nothing to gain by getting all pissy about it. It's not like he's going to change his mind most likely. And if he does, he's just going to be a bitter, negative nancy the whole trip.
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"plus they atually think jambands are good or sumthing, so they clearly know absolutely nothing about music, clearly lol" -Bassfreak
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XUL
OTD Janitor



Registered: 03/16/05
Posts: 28,261
Loc: America
Last seen: 4 years, 3 months
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Quote:
All We Perceive said: Sounds like you overreacted to me. People are flaky and give bullshit fucking excuses all the time. Not showing up to your going away party is pretty un-friendlike but I would just turn the other cheek. You have nothing to gain by getting all pissy about it. It's not like he's going to change his mind most likely. And if he does, he's just going to be a bitter, negative nancy the whole trip.
Eh.
Its just that the last trip we planned he backed out on the night before too. It pisses me off.
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TRUMP 2020
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DivineIntensity
Techno-Optimist



Registered: 09/03/11
Posts: 2,720
Loc: Florida
Last seen: 5 years, 10 months
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Re: Am I overreacting? [Re: XUL]
#15978627 - 03/21/12 09:59 PM (11 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
XUL said: So I planned this trip with 3 of my good friends. We are going to go south and hang out before I leave for the Navy. I told everybody that I will cover the costs except for the food and beer. I told everybody about this trip 4 months in advance and they all wanted to go.
Well, a week ago I call my friend and he tells me that he cant wait to go on the trip and its going to be so much fun. Tonight he calls me and tells me that he can not go because he asked for overtime last night and the boss scheduled him overtime on the days we were supposed to go.
I mean.. Is that a total dick move on his part or what? I wanted to bring my friends on a trip and now I cant fill his seat a week before the trip. I hung up on the ass and I dont even know what to say I am so pissed. He tried to call me back and I just ignored it.
I am a reasonable guy but I am tired of playing the nice guy all the time and getting fucked over like an vagina. 
I understand where you're coming from but you did over-react a bit man, I mean a job is a job he can't just skip out when he has overtime those days. He might have asked for over-time but chances are he didn't ask for it on those specific days.
But yeah dude, try and work it out and see if there's any chance he can get out of it. I'm pretty fucking sure, that his boss would be understanding and they could work something out.
I mean, you're going to the fucking navy for christs sake
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danielx
whatup!


Registered: 10/13/08
Posts: 6,500
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Re: Am I overreacting? [Re: XUL]
#15978667 - 03/21/12 10:05 PM (11 years, 11 months ago) |
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did he find out he was going to have to work those days before tonight? If so, i'd be angry. If you are going to flake, atleast have the courtsey to tell me ASAP, not wait a night before.
The overtime is probably a bullshit story anyway.
-------------------- Long live kratom
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qbe
New but old



Registered: 08/16/11
Posts: 1,253
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Re: Am I overreacting? [Re: danielx]
#15978712 - 03/21/12 10:13 PM (11 years, 11 months ago) |
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I have the same type of so called friends. One was so excited to go to Bisco this year, so I told him to get his ticket then I'd get mine. Two weeks later, he told me about the phish tour. I told him what about Bisco and he said he would get them too. This was all after I told him about Electric Forest and he said he was down.
You get used to them and keep them on the outer edges of friends. I have learned not to rely on them at all though. Maybe you overreacted, but I have been screwed in your situation before too.
-------------------- I eat mushrooms to meet hippie chicks.
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muistrue
Inspired by the mystery


Registered: 03/20/05
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Loc: Behind the Redwoods
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Re: Am I overreacting? [Re: XUL]
#15978755 - 03/21/12 10:21 PM (11 years, 11 months ago) |
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I can understand that you're disappointed that's reasonable but the whole hanging up in his face and ignoring him bit is kinda weird.
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All We Perceive
Sea Cucumber



Registered: 09/24/07
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Re: Am I overreacting? [Re: XUL]
#15978793 - 03/21/12 10:34 PM (11 years, 11 months ago) |
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A good friend did that to us for Bisco last year and never even told me. I had to find out through his sister that he had dropped out. He arranged the entire trip and rented the van for us to travel in (later cancelling everything). None of our cars were suitable and none of us were of adequate age to rent a suitable vehicle (I think you need to be 25?). Boy was I PISSED. I just told him that I was really pissed off and disappointed with him as we all had bought tickets and relied on him. Truth be told, I would never have planned a trip with him again had he not gone out of his way to join me at blackwater last september to make up for it. Although he is one of the most stubborn mother fuckers alive, I think he really did realize how much he fucked us. Sometimes you just have to hope your friend eventually gets human decency and respect. Until then, you can't force it upon him.
It is rather obvious that if your friend actually wanted to join you, he would have specifically asked to not have overtime on those days and the work would have accommodated him as he asked to have overtime (i.e. they didn't force it on him). Additionally, he didn't forget as he just told you he was excited for the trip the week prior. I would have just shrugged my shoulders, been disappointed, told him I was, and never invited him on a trip again. My take is that he never planned to go and was just looking for an excuse not to go. Sucks, but sounds like you have other friends with which to party with. I would just focus on the badass time you will have.
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"plus they atually think jambands are good or sumthing, so they clearly know absolutely nothing about music, clearly lol" -Bassfreak
Edited by All We Perceive (03/21/12 10:35 PM)
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Muufokfok
aka BoxyBrown


Registered: 02/14/07
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Re: Am I overreacting? [Re: XUL]
#15978832 - 03/21/12 10:43 PM (11 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
XUL said:
Quote:
All We Perceive said: Sounds like you overreacted to me. People are flaky and give bullshit fucking excuses all the time. Not showing up to your going away party is pretty un-friendlike but I would just turn the other cheek. You have nothing to gain by getting all pissy about it. It's not like he's going to change his mind most likely. And if he does, he's just going to be a bitter, negative nancy the whole trip.
Eh.
Its just that the last trip we planned he backed out on the night before too. It pisses me off.
dude ive been in your situation, a friend canceled on tickets i sold him the night before the concert(gave it to him a week before). i had to find someone to buy them within 14 hours. i was :tickedoff:
-------------------- "I'm guessing the 'ancient lost drug' of india is psychedelic mushrooms. The correlation between sacred cows (in hinduism) and magic mushrooms growing on cow dung is too strong to ignore, if you ask me."
  As the ocean waves, the universe "peoples" ~Alan Watts~
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NWlight
Just look


Registered: 01/12/10
Posts: 18,686
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Re: Am I overreacting? [Re: Muufokfok]
#15979065 - 03/21/12 11:46 PM (11 years, 11 months ago) |
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you, sir are being the vagina.
i mean honestly look down, what do you see. a penis and balls.
that entitles you to more emotional stability than this.
fucking guy drama, who hangs up on another dude because their job kept them from hanging out 
one of my pet peeves is when people skip disappointed and go right to angry.
srsly brah.
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qbe
New but old



Registered: 08/16/11
Posts: 1,253
Loc: Philadelphia
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Re: Am I overreacting? [Re: NWlight]
#15979104 - 03/21/12 11:55 PM (11 years, 11 months ago) |
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4 months in advance and he couldn't ask off. It's not the jobs fault.
-------------------- I eat mushrooms to meet hippie chicks.
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NWlight
Just look


Registered: 01/12/10
Posts: 18,686
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Re: Am I overreacting? [Re: qbe]
#15979415 - 03/22/12 01:42 AM (11 years, 11 months ago) |
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nah im saying, it's ok to be upset with the friend but he doesn't need to be dramatic about it.
if i had plans to hang out with a friend i would have asked for the time off WAY in advance because thats the kind of person i am.
but you can't be a little bitch when someone ditches on you.
i'm the kind of person where if you cross me I'd rather just cut you out of my life entirely than get mad at you, because you're clearly not worth my time.
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Oldgregg
I'm old gregg!



Registered: 03/29/09
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Re: Am I overreacting? [Re: NWlight]
#15979444 - 03/22/12 01:53 AM (11 years, 11 months ago) |
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if he asked for overtime knowing that he already had plans then yea. kinda a dick move
it does really suck when you put a lot of time into doing something for people and they take it for granted
people do this all the time though and its natural to react like that, but you learn that thats how some people are and eventually you just count on them dropping so its no big deal
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NWlight
Just look


Registered: 01/12/10
Posts: 18,686
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Re: Am I overreacting? [Re: Oldgregg]
#15979471 - 03/22/12 02:02 AM (11 years, 11 months ago) |
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true that, i have a few friends who are just generally unreliable.
this might seem exactly in contradiction to what i said a minute ago but with people who are otherwise NOT assholes, you just gotta accept that they're kind of a flake and know that when they say they'll do something they might not mean it.
the reason OP definitely has a reason to cut this fool off tho is because of 1) the epicness of the trip, (planned so far in advance) and 2) the last-minuteness of the ditching
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