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Demonic_Chronic
The Plague Doctress



Registered: 08/10/08
Posts: 4,199
Loc: PNW
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I had accepted death...I was almost hoping for it---Psilohuasca 1
#15963343 - 03/18/12 01:08 PM (11 years, 11 months ago) |
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So this all starts with a short funny story. Me and my roommate were sitting pondering what to eat for dinner, he suggests drugs  So we actually run with this idea and i start grinding up some syrian rue to make Psilohuasca. As the rue is cooking i break up my shrooms (Oak ridge) and pack into capsules. Well we drink the Harmala/Harmaline and wait 25 minutes then down the capsules. I had around 3.6 grams and my roommate had around 2.8.
By the time We had started downing the capsules, we could feel the euphoria from the harmala/harmaline, along with a white flashing field of view with eyes closed. After dreadfully swallowing the last capsule, I head off into my roommates room to put on a really good playlist i made. First band is Carbon based Lifeforms and their album interloper. I pack a bong and we smoke it over the period of 20 minutes or so. Afterwards I lie down and close my eyes and start watching patterns and crazy pictures unfold before my eyes. About 40 minutes after ingesting the capsules, it started to truly take hold and by an hour in I was
Well another roommate comes in at about an hour and fifteen minutes in and asks if we wanna go have a cig..I oblige and as i walk through the apartment to the porch, I notice i slight disturbance in my stomach but think nothing of it. On my way back to the room after the cigarette, I notice the turmoil is building and my equilibrium is quickly dissipating. This is a bit unsettling because I have never lost equilibrium while tripping and this was not my first venture with MAOI's and Tryptamines. I get to the bed and lay down and my stomach is getting worse and worse, and im starting to sweat really bad. I move to a computer chair, pack a bowl in hopes of calming my stomach down. But to no avail.. The sweating is getting worse and im quickly rising in temp. To be honest, i felt as if i was dying. My heart hurt and every movement i made added to the sheer agony i was experience. I was accepting death, hoping for it as it would be better than my current situation. Its hard to comprehend the severity of the situation without experiencing it. The visuals even became evil and maddening, twisting and contorting as if laughing at my current state of being. The weirdest part of this whole experience is that i enjoyed every second of it, even during the hellish ride for the first couple hours. I decide i need to cool off so i go to the shower, barely making it. When i turned on the water, it sounded so evil and malevolent. But i had to cool down. After laying down and letting the water beat on me for 20 minutes I start to feel better and i get outta the shower and return to the music. My stomach has calmed down and the rest of the trip was generally smooth sailing and we smoked some more bud and enjoyed the rest of the trip which ended up lasting around 6 hours in total until we started to come down. overall it was a 10+ hour experience that i wouldnt trade for anything. Truly accepting death and asking for it is humbling, this experience did not scare me but instead it was an eye opener. It opened my eyes to the limits of my body in a way and I gained a new level of respect for psychedelic substances. Overall i really enjoyed this experience and I will never underestimate psychedelics again.
Thanks for reading!
DC
-------------------- The Real violence, the violence that I realized was unforgiveable Is the violence that we do to ourselves When we are too afraid to be, who we really are.
 
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LSDylan
bass music enjoyer



Registered: 05/26/10
Posts: 4,992
Loc: Michigan
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Re: I had accepted death...I was almost hoping for it---Psilohuasca [Re: Demonic_Chronic]
#15963397 - 03/18/12 01:27 PM (11 years, 11 months ago) |
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Great post I quite enjoyed reading it. Accepting death while tripping is a familiar concept to me but I can't put my finger on when exactly I experienced it, although I am certain it was on a high dose of mushrooms. It really is quite a profound state of mind.
-------------------- DanceSafe | Voluntaryism
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gornyhuy
A Myth Intrepidly Met



Registered: 08/04/09
Posts: 2,933
Loc: USA
Last seen: 2 years, 3 months
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Re: I had accepted death...I was almost hoping for it---Psilohuasca [Re: LSDylan]
#15963920 - 03/18/12 04:17 PM (11 years, 11 months ago) |
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Interesting read - I've had several "accepted death, disappointed it didn't work out that way" trips, but none of them were from physical discomfort like that. For example, in one of them I was convinced that I had the choice to either reboot all of reality, essentially killing off myself and everyone else in the universe, or just lay back and come back down into regular life again. I didn't have the balls to reboot, and I was fairly weirded out, disappointed, and relieved all at the same time.
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Demonic_Chronic
The Plague Doctress



Registered: 08/10/08
Posts: 4,199
Loc: PNW
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Re: I had accepted death...I was almost hoping for it---Psilohuasca [Re: gornyhuy]
#15964899 - 03/18/12 08:26 PM (11 years, 11 months ago) |
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Yeah it was so strange.
DC
-------------------- The Real violence, the violence that I realized was unforgiveable Is the violence that we do to ourselves When we are too afraid to be, who we really are.
 
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