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 YeeeeeeMuffins
Stranger
Registered: 02/06/12
Posts: 116
Last seen: 11 years, 3 months
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 Habiby and the vomiting girl   1
#15922947 - 03/09/12 02:40 AM (12 years, 1 month ago) |
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So I'm at the bar tonight, watching women's college basketball and drinking Miller High Life as one should be on any given Thursday night. It's going good, I'm about 4 deep and Texas A&M are up; I had just bought a clove from the bathroom attendant that tasted lovely. I start sucking on this gem of a smoke, feelin' like a cheerleader, it'd been too long...
So these broads post up next to me all lit up from whatever high they got at the previous bars they attended and order shots and cranberry vodkas. There was nothing distinctly bothering about their presence and I continued watching those girls toss balls around. There was one playing for Texas with some sort of advanced knee brace dropping threes like nobody's business that I grew particularly fond of.
So I'm about 6 deep now and I notice that one of the drunk broads is resting resting her head on the bar top. Sure enough, 5 minutes later I turn to a sea of vomit sliding towards me at a medium pace and thank the gods it quit a bit before it reached my general area. It smelled like god damned fruit loops. fuckin' dames
I scoot on over while the bar back continually brings steaming buckets of some sort of sanitary solution to poor over the infected region of the bar. The tender apologizes to me and buys my next beer even though it was no fault of his that this bitch yacked all over the place. I shook his hand and thought afterwards that he's lucky I was sucking on 2 dollar beers.
I have a quarter of my last beer down and Habiby pats me on the back(I was in an outdoor bar and he must have noticed my jacket or some such shit, it was surprising). I turn, shake his hand, and tell him that I'm going to need his services after I finish the beer I had in front of me. I get her down, close out, and head out of the bar. Habiby is there and ready to get going. He lights me up a cigarette and heads towards my place like he's been there a hundred times. He forget the last bit of rights and lefts but considering that it was only his 4th time taking me home I was pretty stoked that he got me as close as he did without my help. As we approach my place he tells me that next week he's going to have some Egyptian food for me. He asked if I liked lamb or fish, I told him fish, he asked how many people live with me, and I told him.
I'll bet your cabby doesn't hook you up with home made mediterranean food
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 thoughts
imagining.
 
Registered: 10/06/07
Posts: 16,816
Loc: here.
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Dude, Habiby is the fucking man.
Idk if youre just making this Habiby shit up, but Habiby is the fucking man.
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I need Jesus.
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YeeeeeeMuffins
Stranger
Registered: 02/06/12
Posts: 116
Last seen: 11 years, 3 months
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Re: Habiby and the vomiting girl [Re: thoughts]
#15922967 - 03/09/12 02:48 AM (12 years, 1 month ago) |
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I feel like it would be more impressive if this cat was a figment of my imagination and I was just doing some creative writing all up in this shroomeries. Unfortunately I don't have those kind of skills but I sure as shit am lucky to have stumbled into this dude's back seat.
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I_was_the_walrus
eggshells
Registered: 05/01/02
Posts: 11,887
Loc: next door
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I could try to make a story like that up...but it always ends with naked women.
So I was walking to the bar, and uhhhh.....a naked woman picked me up. Wait, did I say bar? I meant secret karate match. Like the kind in blood sport.
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YeeeeeeMuffins
Stranger
Registered: 02/06/12
Posts: 116
Last seen: 11 years, 3 months
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I was certainly considering trying to get the yacking girl naked with me before she chucked that shit all over the bar top. She was all petite and short haired. mmm
I'm not quite sure whether or not it would have been a better story if I ended up in a strange room with a naked, drunk, girl throwing up on my chest while my average cock was all of the way inside of her but I think getting the offer of free egyptian food from a cab driver is more satisfying at this point in my life.
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Azure Essence
Registered: 10/03/10
Posts: 8,272
Loc: 
Last seen: 9 months, 20 days
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HABIBY FOR PRESIDENT
where do i get my shirt?
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YeeeeeeMuffins
Stranger
Registered: 02/06/12
Posts: 116
Last seen: 11 years, 3 months
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So I got a ride from Habiby tonight, as usual. He told me there's going to be a party at his place on Tuesday with many Egyptian women. I want to go but I'm not sure if I should ingest the 1.5g stem that I have lying around. My intuition says that I should hit it up sober and eat some lamb and falafel but mildly tripping at my cab drivers party seems legit.
I have an eighth on top of that 1.5 grams and have been heavily considering a 5g dose, Terrence Mckenna style in the dark, silent, room and what not. I'd take suggestions on that and what not
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fee
Im he who is the
Registered: 01/16/03
Posts: 18,238
Loc: amsterdam
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Tell me you live in northern cali do I can go party with you and Habiby.
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blankk said to fee:
btw you're a total fucking psychedelic pimp
Turtletotem said:
I want to become a sun worshipper, so next time an atheist smugly asks me where god is, I can point smugly at the sun and laugh my ass off.
Then I drive away in my solar powered piece of shit car, cool stuff man.
And then I go kill a bitch because the flaming orb in the sky told me to do so, and I don't know, oppress a few minorities here and there in the name of nuclear fusion?
Religion is fun.
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thoughts
imagining.
Registered: 10/06/07
Posts: 16,816
Loc: here.
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Re: Habiby and the vomiting girl [Re: fee]
#15979359 - 03/22/12 01:21 AM (12 years, 28 days ago) |
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I'd go sober and have some drinks with the ladies.
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I need Jesus.
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YeeeeeeMuffins
Stranger
Registered: 02/06/12
Posts: 116
Last seen: 11 years, 3 months
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Re: Habiby and the vomiting girl [Re: fee]
#15979364 - 03/22/12 01:23 AM (12 years, 28 days ago) |
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^^Unfortunately I don't and even more so, Habiby used to live in Norther California so you might have narrowly missed out on a chance of experiencing the glory of his Egyptian style. If you're down for doing psychs in nor cal though I might be down to make the drive
^That is what I am thinking
Edited by YeeeeeeMuffins (03/22/12 01:25 AM)
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fee
Im he who is the
Registered: 01/16/03
Posts: 18,238
Loc: amsterdam
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I'm always down.
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blankk said to fee:
btw you're a total fucking psychedelic pimp
Turtletotem said:
I want to become a sun worshipper, so next time an atheist smugly asks me where god is, I can point smugly at the sun and laugh my ass off.
Then I drive away in my solar powered piece of shit car, cool stuff man.
And then I go kill a bitch because the flaming orb in the sky told me to do so, and I don't know, oppress a few minorities here and there in the name of nuclear fusion?
Religion is fun.
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YeeeeeeMuffins
Stranger
Registered: 02/06/12
Posts: 116
Last seen: 11 years, 3 months
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Re: Habiby and the vomiting girl [Re: fee]
#15979379 - 03/22/12 01:28 AM (12 years, 28 days ago) |
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awe yeeeeeeee
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Oldgregg
I'm old gregg!
Registered: 03/29/09
Posts: 3,066
Loc: China
Last seen: 3 months, 15 days
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gig em
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YeeeeeeMuffins
Stranger
Registered: 02/06/12
Posts: 116
Last seen: 11 years, 3 months
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Re: Habiby and the vomiting girl [Re: Oldgregg]
#15997298 - 03/26/12 02:23 AM (12 years, 24 days ago) |
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As happens fairly often I required the use of Habiby's services. He was very persistent about my attendance at his part which is one day from tomorrow. He gave me his drivers license and had me take down his address; He said "do not call and say Habiby I am sick." My understanding is that it will be all of his family from California and that it is a party for him specifically.
I have decided that I am definitely going despite the fact that I'm going to be the socially awkward, tattooed, white guy that only knows Habiby because he's too drunk to drive quite often. Tonight he made it clear that he would be offended if I didn't and I don't want to lose the most amazing cab driver that I have ever met.
trip report will be coming after tuesday
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Azure Essence
Registered: 10/03/10
Posts: 8,272
Loc:
Last seen: 9 months, 20 days
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Dude it's not even a question. Tell us how the food is
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propensity
۞̷ ̶۞̷ ̶
Registered: 01/06/10
Posts: 11,056
Loc: Bedrock America
Last seen: 3 years, 9 months
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Quote:
Azure Essence said:
Dude it's not even a question. Tell us how the food is
Word.
People like habiby are what make the earth an alright place to be.
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۞̷̛̗̗͉͇̰̅͒ͯͩ̆ͯ̑͘ ̶̖̭ͧ͛ͬ͑ͣͦ̍ͧ͐͟͢ www.cactophage.com ۞̷̛̗̗͉͇̰̅͒ͯͩ̆ͯ̑͘ ̶̖̭ͧ͛ͬ͑ͣͦ̍ͧ͐͟͢
̸ۨ͜۞̷̛̗̗͉͇̰̅͒ͯͩ̆ͯ̑͘ ̶̖̭ͧ͛ͬ͑ͣͦ̍ͧ͐͟Dolphins of Dank۞̷̛̗̗͉͇̰̅͒ͯͩ̆
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Its Pat
Still kicking
Registered: 03/01/01
Posts: 8,004
Loc: THAT MAKES ME BETTER THAN YOU
Last seen: 16 days, 15 hours
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Quote:
I_was_the_walrus said:
I could try to make a story like that up...but it always ends with naked women.
So I was walking to the bar, and uhhhh.....a naked woman picked me up. Wait, did I say bar? I meant secret karate match. Like the kind in blood sport.
I believe the word for that blood sport tournament is Ku Ma Tai.
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BigUpRadio
WorldReggaeShow
DreaderThanDread - Listen!
(druqs said) don't get arsey, just get RC.
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Constantine
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Registered: 05/01/11
Posts: 4,643
Loc: 
Last seen: 1 month, 19 days
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Re: Habiby and the vomiting girl [Re: Its Pat]
#15997495 - 03/26/12 05:10 AM (12 years, 24 days ago) |
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Quote:
have been heavily considering a 5g dose, Terrence Mckenna style in the dark, silent, room and what not. I'd take suggestions on that and what not
I say do the 5g dose with Habiby
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DNKYD
Turtle!
Registered: 09/23/04
Posts: 12,326
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Habiby has got to be the best cabby in the world. Let us know how the party goes.
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Demonic_Chronic
The Plague Doctress
Registered: 08/10/08
Posts: 4,199
Loc: PNW
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Re: Habiby and the vomiting girl [Re: DNKYD]
#15998038 - 03/26/12 09:57 AM (12 years, 24 days ago) |
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Habiby does seem cool, i like the image you have built of habiby 
makes me want to think theres more cool cab drivers.
DC
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The Real violence, the violence that I realized was unforgiveable
Is the violence that we do to ourselves
When we are too afraid to be, who we really are.
 
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Oldgregg
I'm old gregg!
Registered: 03/29/09
Posts: 3,066
Loc: China
Last seen: 3 months, 15 days
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it's like ranjit from How I Met Your Mother
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YeeeeeeMuffins
Stranger
Registered: 02/06/12
Posts: 116
Last seen: 11 years, 3 months
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Re: Habiby and the vomiting girl [Re: Oldgregg]
#16006808 - 03/28/12 02:33 AM (12 years, 22 days ago) |
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I have disappointing news, I got too much in my head about this party and didn't show up. I went to the bar and of course, Habiby takes no breaks for party night, walks into the bar, steps up next to me looking deep into my eyes and says nothing. I tell him right away that my anxiety got on top of me and that I feel like an asshole. He placed his hand on my thigh(which I hope is a cultural thing) gave me some back rubs and said, "It's ok, i have egyptian food in the cab, when you ready, I'm here."
I suck down 4 more beers than I was planning on because I felt like shit for skipping out on Habiby's party. I stumble out of the bar and sure enough he's right there and he hands me a foil covered plate. I begin apologizing for not being there, he seems fine and says I don't have any cigarettes(god damned habiby) so I give him one of mine. We get to my place, get out of the car and have our usual hug, he say's "I love you brother"
I feel the same; it's weird and I shouldn't but I feel an attachment to this man. We hug again and I take my plate of food inside. I open it up, eat a couple pieces of chicken(tasty), eat the dolmades(oh my god I had this once in a chain place and didn't like it but once again god damned this shit it's tasty.), I give a piece of chicken to my dog, go up to my room and eat a 1.5g stem I had laying around for no other reason than being confused about my situation.
Why didn't I just go to his party? Why was he so nice even after I bailed on him? fuck
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fee
Im he who is the
Registered: 01/16/03
Posts: 18,238
Loc: amsterdam
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Dude what city does this amazing guy work in. If he's not to car from humboldt CA I will go there and bring as many friends that I can and we all take him out for an awesome time out on us.
And get this, I, yes me for the first time ever be the D&D for habiby and crew.
Shroomery units to show a great guy how much we think if him.
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blankk said to fee:
btw you're a total fucking psychedelic pimp
Turtletotem said:
I want to become a sun worshipper, so next time an atheist smugly asks me where god is, I can point smugly at the sun and laugh my ass off.
Then I drive away in my solar powered piece of shit car, cool stuff man.
And then I go kill a bitch because the flaming orb in the sky told me to do so, and I don't know, oppress a few minorities here and there in the name of nuclear fusion?
Religion is fun.
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thoughts
imagining.
Registered: 10/06/07
Posts: 16,816
Loc: here.
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I think Habiby wants your nuts.
But why didnt you go to his party maan?
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I need Jesus.
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Shroomism
Space Travellin
Registered: 02/13/00
Posts: 66,015
Loc: 9th Dimension
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Man flaking out on Habiby's party.. for shame! 
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YeeeeeeMuffins
Stranger
Registered: 02/06/12
Posts: 116
Last seen: 11 years, 3 months
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Re: Habiby and the vomiting girl [Re: Shroomism]
#16006874 - 03/28/12 03:12 AM (12 years, 22 days ago) |
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It's incredibly shameful. I just got all up in my head about it, I'm a socially awkward fuck... I'll try and not let myself live this down
but I'm pretty sure that Habiby wants my nuts
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fee
Im he who is the
Registered: 01/16/03
Posts: 18,238
Loc: amsterdam
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After standing him up like that the very least you could do is hook up some nuttage share time with him.
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blankk said to fee:
btw you're a total fucking psychedelic pimp
Turtletotem said:
I want to become a sun worshipper, so next time an atheist smugly asks me where god is, I can point smugly at the sun and laugh my ass off.
Then I drive away in my solar powered piece of shit car, cool stuff man.
And then I go kill a bitch because the flaming orb in the sky told me to do so, and I don't know, oppress a few minorities here and there in the name of nuclear fusion?
Religion is fun.
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YeeeeeeMuffins
Stranger
Registered: 02/06/12
Posts: 116
Last seen: 11 years, 3 months
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Re: Habiby and the vomiting girl [Re: fee]
#16006884 - 03/28/12 03:20 AM (12 years, 22 days ago) |
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dude I'll totally rail habiby
also i am kind of tripping right now
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fee
Im he who is the
Registered: 01/16/03
Posts: 18,238
Loc: amsterdam
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Quote:
YeeeeeeMuffins said:
dude I'll totally rail habiby
also i am kind of tripping right now
Fact proven once again for the millionth time.
Shrooms make you gay.
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blankk said to fee:
btw you're a total fucking psychedelic pimp
Turtletotem said:
I want to become a sun worshipper, so next time an atheist smugly asks me where god is, I can point smugly at the sun and laugh my ass off.
Then I drive away in my solar powered piece of shit car, cool stuff man.
And then I go kill a bitch because the flaming orb in the sky told me to do so, and I don't know, oppress a few minorities here and there in the name of nuclear fusion?
Religion is fun.
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