|
Middleman

Registered: 07/11/99
Posts: 8,399
|
Spiritual Enlightenment - The Damnedest Thing
#15858575 - 02/24/12 05:31 PM (11 years, 11 months ago) |
|
|
I've posted about Jed here before. Thought I would once more before I head to the mountains. 
NOTICE IS HEREBY GIVEN:
BY CONTINUING BEYOND THIS POINT the reader acknowledges and agrees that the state of Spiritual Enlightenment discussed herein conveys upon the seeker-aspirant-victim no benefits, boons, blessings, or special powers and bears little or no resemblance to assorted New Age or Eastern varieties widely dispensed under the same name. Orgasmic euphoria, orgiastic bliss, obscene wealth, perfect health, eternal peace, angelic ascension, cosmic consciousness, purified aura, astral projection, pan-dimensional travel, extra-sensory perception, access to akashic records, profound wisdom, sagely demeanor, radiant countenance, omniscience, omnipotence, omnipresence and opening of the third eye are not likely to result. Tuning, harmonizing, balancing, energizing, reversing or opening of the chakras should not be expected. The kundalini serpent dwelling at the base of the spine will not be awakened, poked, prodded, raised, or otherwise molested.
NO PROMISE OF SELF-ADVANCEMENT self-esteem, self-aggrandizement, self-gratification, self-satisfaction or self-improvement is made or implied. Likewise, self-indulgent, self-involved, self-centered, self-absorbed, and self-serving persons will not find satisfaction herein. The reader should construe no assurance of reward, rapture, empowerment, deliverance, salvation, enrichment, forgiveness, or eternal rest in a heavenly abode. No raising, altering, transforming, transferring, transposing, transfiguring, transmuting, transcending or transmigrating of consciousness is to be expected.
PURCHASE OR POSSESSION OF THESE BOOKS does not grant admittance to idyllic or mythical realms including but not limited to: Atlantis, Elysium, Garden of Eden, Heaven, Never-Never-Land, Nirvana, Paradise, Promised Land, Shambhala, Shangri-la, or Utopia.
THESE BOOKS MAKE EXTENSIVE USE of analogy and symbolism. The terms vampire, zombie, caterpillar, butterfly, dreamstate, Maya, and others are used metaphorically. Likewise, any suggestion that the reader should leap from a skyscraper, step into a blazing inferno, perform ritual self-disembowelment, or bathe in a vat of corrosive acids are not to be taken literally. The reader is advised that cutting off his or her hand, plucking out his or her eye, or chopping off his or her head, may result in bodily injury.
THE PURSUIT AND ATTAINMENT of Spiritual Enlightenment may entail loss of ego, identity, humanity, mind, friends, relatives, job, home, children, car, money, jewelry, respect, specificity in time, solidity in space, strict adherence to accepted physical laws, and reason for living.
THE SPIRITUAL ENLIGHTENMENT REFERRED TO HEREIN is a process and product of will and self-determination. It requires no reliance on or cooperation with God, Goddess, Satan, discorporate entities (angelic or demonic), gurus, swamis, seers, sages, holymen, priests, teachers, philosophers, faeries, gnomes, pixies, sprites, (wee folk of any sort), or any other agent or agency of non-self authority.
HEART-CENTERED APPROACHES AND QUALITIES generally considered to be of the essence of Spiritual Enlightenment, such as love, compassion, tolerance, grace, tranquility, and pacifism, will be viewed herein as antithetical, misleading, and irrelevant.
THE SEEKER-ASPIRANT-VICTIM has no need of any spiritual practices or belief systems including but not limited to Buddhism, Kabbalah, Hinduism, Sufism, Taoism, Gnosticism, Mohammadism, Judaism, Christism, Paganism, Occultism, Zoroastrianism, Wicca, Yoga, Tai Chi, Feng Shui, Martial Arts, Magick, or Necromancy.
THE SEEKER-ASPIRANT-VICTIM has no need of any so-called spiritual or New Age paraphernalia, trinkets or amulets including but not limited to crystals, gems, stones, seeds, beads, shells, incense, candles, aromas, bells, gongs, chimes, altars, images, or idols. No special clothing, jewelry, adornments, tattoos, or fashion accessories are necessary to this endeavor.
THE SEEKER-ASPIRANT-VICTIM need not avail him or herself of any of the myriad enlightenment-inducing procedures and techniques including but not limited to meditation, candle-gazing, mantra intoning, subjugation to guru, standing on one leg, pilgrimage on belly, unaided flight, drugs, breathing techniques, fasting, wandering in deserts, self-flagellation, vows of silence, sexual indulgence or sexual continence.
THE SEEKER-ASPIRANT-VICTIM has no need or use for any spiritual powers, arts or sciences including but not limited to astrology, numerology, divination, tarot or rune reading, mandala making, fire-walking, psychic surgery, automatic writing, channeling, pyramid power, telepathy, clairvoyance, lucid dreaming, dream interpretation, ESP, levitation, bi-location, psychokinesis, or remote viewing. Furthermore, tricks, stunts or feats such as shooting arrows from horseback, endurance of cold, live burial, materializing ash or jewelry, walking on fire or glass, laying on glass or nails, piercing of face or arms, conjuring and rope tricks, have no bearing or merit as regards the Spiritual Enlightenment discussed herein.
THE SEEKER-ASPIRANT-VICTIM is hereby advised that study of ancient cultures, travel to distant lands, or learning of foreign languages avails not in the least, and that, for the purposes of understanding and attaining the Spiritual Enlightenment discussed herein, there is no better place than here and no better time than now.
CONFRONTATION WITH PERSONAL DEMONS the facing of deep-seated fears, and the step-by-step dismantling of personal identity may result in elevated pulse, high blood pressure, loss of equilibrium, loss of motor control, pallor and loss of skin tone, loss of hair and teeth, loss of appetite, loss of sleep, loss of bowel and bladder control, tremors, fatigue, shortness of breath, dry-heaves, acid reflux, dyspepsia, halitosis, diarrhea, seborrhea, psoriasis, sweating, swelling, and swooning. The emotional upheaval attendant upon the discovery that one is oneself a fictional character in a staged drama may result in forlornness, weltschmerz, intolerance, anger, hostility, resentment, hopelessness, despondency, suicidal despair, morbid depression, and a suffocating awareness of life’s meaninglessness.
THESE BOOKS ARE NOT INTENDED for human consumption. If ingested, induce vomiting and seek immediate medical assistance. Avoid inserting these books into bodily cavities. Repeatedly plunging these books into the mouth, eyes, ears, nose, vagina or rectum may result in unsightly bulges and a painful burning sensation. If symptoms persist, consult a qualified metaphysician.
ALL CHARACTERS, PLACES AND EVENTS depicted in these books are entirely fictional insofar as these books and the universe in which they exist are entirely fictional. Any resemblance to actual people, places and events is purely the result of resemblance to actual people, places and events.
NO DOLPHINS WERE SWUM WITH in the making of these books. Removal of this warning is illegal where prohibited by law. Batteries not included. Be careful what you wish for. Jed McKenna action figure sold separately.
www.wisefoolpress.com
|
circastes
Big Questions Small Head


Registered: 01/14/10
Posts: 8,781
Loc: straya
Last seen: 7 years, 8 months
|
Re: Spiritual Enlightenment - The Damnedest Thing [Re: Middleman] 2
#15858834 - 02/24/12 06:41 PM (11 years, 10 months ago) |
|
|
Here's some enlightenment that won't take as long to read:
You.
(Good day.)
-------------------- My solitude... My shield... My armour... TESTED WITH FULL FORCE
|
White Beard

Registered: 08/13/11
Posts: 6,325
|
Re: Spiritual Enlightenment - The Damnedest Thing [Re: Middleman]
#15858916 - 02/24/12 07:11 PM (11 years, 10 months ago) |
|
|
I listened to the audio book one night and was impressed. I didn't become enlightened, but did have some pretty interesting switches in attention during the course of the listen.
Where are you going in the mountains? Do you plan on living survival style? Good luck.
|
Bridgeburner
Not spiritual at all.




Registered: 09/16/06
Posts: 20,010
|
Re: Spiritual Enlightenment - The Damnedest Thing [Re: circastes]
#15859418 - 02/24/12 09:08 PM (11 years, 10 months ago) |
|
|
Quote:
circastes said: Here's some enlightenment that won't take as long to read:
You.
(Good day.)
--------------------
|
White Beard

Registered: 08/13/11
Posts: 6,325
|
Re: Spiritual Enlightenment - The Damnedest Thing [Re: circastes]
#15859475 - 02/24/12 09:20 PM (11 years, 10 months ago) |
|
|
Quote:
circastes said: Here's some enlightenment that won't take as long to read:
You.
(Good day.)
|
cbub
it


Registered: 10/17/10
Posts: 1,412
Last seen: 5 years, 11 months
|
Re: Spiritual Enlightenment - The Damnedest Thing [Re: White Beard]
#15860310 - 02/25/12 01:06 AM (11 years, 10 months ago) |
|
|
I totally agree with Adya that all practices toward awakening are made just to tire the seeker out until he just stops. I wouldn't know about enlightenment though, that would have been guessing.
thnx for a laugh, o.p.
Edited by cbub (02/25/12 01:37 AM)
|
circastes
Big Questions Small Head


Registered: 01/14/10
Posts: 8,781
Loc: straya
Last seen: 7 years, 8 months
|
Re: Spiritual Enlightenment - The Damnedest Thing [Re: Bridgeburner]
#15860477 - 02/25/12 02:22 AM (11 years, 10 months ago) |
|
|
Quote:
b0red5tiff said:
Quote:
circastes said: Here's some enlightenment that won't take as long to read:
You.
(Good day.)

lol
-------------------- My solitude... My shield... My armour... TESTED WITH FULL FORCE
|
Jessica Swift
यन्त्र



Registered: 01/13/12
Posts: 1,723
Loc:
|
Re: Spiritual Enlightenment - The Damnedest Thing [Re: circastes] 1
#15860735 - 02/25/12 05:43 AM (11 years, 10 months ago) |
|
|
If Jed gets to dismiss everything else,
Then I get to say:
Fuck Jed.
The end.
|
Grapefruit
Freak in the forest


Registered: 05/09/08
Posts: 5,744
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
|
Re: Spiritual Enlightenment - The Damnedest Thing [Re: Jessica Swift]
#15860812 - 02/25/12 06:56 AM (11 years, 10 months ago) |
|
|
If you actually read the books you'll find the he actually does the very opposite of dismissing everything else. It just doesn't fit into his idea of what awakening about. Always thought this was a hilarious intro, this guy is a top notch writer IMO.
-------------------- Little left in the way of energy; or the way of love, yet happy to entertain myself playing mental games with the rest of you freaks until the rivers run backwards. "Chat your fraff Chat your fraff Just chat your fraff Chat your fraff"
|
LSDenthusiast
Not Knowing


Registered: 01/04/05
Posts: 389
Last seen: 14 days, 22 hours
|
Re: Spiritual Enlightenment - The Damnedest Thing [Re: Middleman]
#15861559 - 02/25/12 12:01 PM (11 years, 10 months ago) |
|
|
Yeah "his" books are quite interesting. I've been more curious as to who is behind the pseudo-name Jed Mckenna. He comes off as a more "spiritual" U.G. Krishnamurti.
|
Jessica Swift
यन्त्र



Registered: 01/13/12
Posts: 1,723
Loc:
|
Re: Spiritual Enlightenment - The Damnedest Thing [Re: LSDenthusiast] 1
#15861660 - 02/25/12 12:34 PM (11 years, 10 months ago) |
|
|
Quote:
LSDenthusiast said: Yeah "his" books are quite interesting. I've been more curious as to who is behind the pseudo-name Jed Mckenna. He comes off as a more "spiritual" U.G. Krishnamurti.
Jed McKenna doesn't exist (I'm sure "he" would agree with this on one level!) -- there is no teacher named Jed, no ashram in Iowa, and no students as described in his books. It is all a fake. What evidence do I have for this? the fact that there is no evidence for any of it. No photos, no face-to-face meetings, no one saying they have ever met the man, much less been a student of his (I welcome any evidence to the contrary). McKenna expertly diffuses this objection:
Q: We’ve received many questions about you personally. People want to know about your history, your relationships, your finances, everything. For instance, do you have friends? Do you socialize beyond the student/teacher relationship?
JM: This whole thing really has nothing to do with me personally and it would be counter-productive to shift the focus onto me.
Q: It’s easy to understand why people would be curious.
JM:I’m not relevant to anyone’s search. I’m just a finger pointing at the moon. There’s nothing to be learned from the finger. Everybody’s eager to find a distraction from the real work of waking up, but that’s all it is, a distraction.
http://www.spiritualteachers.org/jed_mckenna.htm
|
LSDenthusiast
Not Knowing


Registered: 01/04/05
Posts: 389
Last seen: 14 days, 22 hours
|
Re: Spiritual Enlightenment - The Damnedest Thing [Re: Jessica Swift]
#15861675 - 02/25/12 12:39 PM (11 years, 10 months ago) |
|
|
Yeah I understand why they used a pseudo-name. Most teachers give that exact same response. "It's not about the teacher, its the message."
Nevertheless still makes me wonder who it really is, some people have even suggested that more than one person might have worked on the trilogy.
I've heard the rumors of being Adyashanti, but I don't buy it.
|
Jessica Swift
यन्त्र



Registered: 01/13/12
Posts: 1,723
Loc:
|
Re: Spiritual Enlightenment - The Damnedest Thing [Re: LSDenthusiast] 1
#15861696 - 02/25/12 12:45 PM (11 years, 10 months ago) |
|
|
Robert Anton Wilson also had several pen names, but I eventually learned his writing style and could catch him in different places. Kind of fun as a literary game. I suspect there are people on these forums that behave in such a way.
|
Jessica Swift
यन्त्र



Registered: 01/13/12
Posts: 1,723
Loc:
|
Re: Spiritual Enlightenment - The Damnedest Thing [Re: Jessica Swift] 1
#15861725 - 02/25/12 12:53 PM (11 years, 10 months ago) |
|
|
I was reading a review of his book on Amazon and one reviewer had this to say. It hit me like an anvil on the head:
"In Hindu terms, folks, maya is Brahma too."
It helps to ease the habit of calling this an illusion, or saying things are unreal.
|
cbub
it


Registered: 10/17/10
Posts: 1,412
Last seen: 5 years, 11 months
|
Re: Spiritual Enlightenment - The Damnedest Thing [Re: Jessica Swift] 2
#15861852 - 02/25/12 01:25 PM (11 years, 10 months ago) |
|
|
all there is, is a thought thinking itself into existence
|
Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
|
Re: Spiritual Enlightenment - The Damnedest Thing [Re: Middleman]
#15862149 - 02/25/12 02:44 PM (11 years, 10 months ago) |
|
|
Sorry but I couldn't find them at the library and didn't want to waste my money on things I likely know more about than the author.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
|
ImmortalZodd
I seek only the strong



Registered: 07/11/11
Posts: 433
Loc: USA
Last seen: 1 year, 9 months
|
Re: Spiritual Enlightenment - The Damnedest Thing [Re: Middleman]
#15864059 - 02/25/12 10:29 PM (11 years, 10 months ago) |
|
|
Quote:
Mr. Middle said:
HEART-CENTERED APPROACHES AND QUALITIES generally considered to be of the essence of Spiritual Enlightenment, such as love, compassion, tolerance, grace, tranquility, and pacifism, will be viewed herein as antithetical, misleading, and irrelevant.
Love...
I can think of no other notion that is more relevant and necessary than love coupled with compassion in our time. Perhaps you should reconsider those "ideals".
--------------------
...the illegality of cannabis is outrageous, an impediment to full utilization of a drug which helps produce the serenity and insight, sensitivity and fellowship so desperately needed in this increasingly mad and dangerous world. Carl Sagan
|
Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
|
Re: Spiritual Enlightenment - The Damnedest Thing [Re: ImmortalZodd]
#15864185 - 02/25/12 11:01 PM (11 years, 10 months ago) |
|
|
And what is love?
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
|
the bizzle
the joke that no one spoke


Registered: 04/14/09
Posts: 11,870
Loc: :seriousbusiness:
Last seen: 10 years, 11 months
|
Re: Spiritual Enlightenment - The Damnedest Thing [Re: Icelander] 3
#15864300 - 02/25/12 11:24 PM (11 years, 10 months ago) |
|
|
baby don't hurt me...
don't hurt me...
no more
-------------------- MY HAIR IS A BIRD YOUR ARGUMENT IS INVALID
  
|
g00ru
lit pants tit licker



Registered: 08/09/07
Posts: 21,088
Loc: georgia, us
Last seen: 5 years, 1 month
|
Re: Spiritual Enlightenment - The Damnedest Thing [Re: the bizzle]
#15866202 - 02/26/12 01:59 PM (11 years, 10 months ago) |
|
|
-------------------- check out my music! drowse in prison and your waking will be but loss
|
|