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Anonymous #1

For all you people who don't commit, or who cheat, what's it like to be you?
    #15412762 - 11/23/11 12:09 PM (12 years, 2 months ago)

I'm someone who, when I'm in a relationship that is serious, I want to be committed, and if the other person does not, then I won't go forward with it until or unless they do want to.

For me, I just like being totally devoted to one person and I commit to them. I can masturbate if I have a sexual urge and I have no problem with controlling anything because I'm just simply a devoted person.

So for those of you who knowingly cheat or who have not been committed or something, what is it like for you? Why can't you or won't you commit? I'm just trying to see your perspective here.


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Anonymous #2

Re: For all you people who don't commit, or who cheat, what's it like to be you? [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #15412877 - 11/23/11 12:38 PM (12 years, 2 months ago)

i think some people are turned off by relationships and commitments, especially if they do not care as much for the other person. devotion comes from love no?

i have never cheated or anything, but if i was ever cheated on or i cheated myself i would know why.


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Invisiblekoraks
Registered: 06/02/03
Posts: 26,670
Re: For all you people who don't commit, or who cheat, what's it like to be you? [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #15413393 - 11/23/11 02:51 PM (12 years, 2 months ago)

OP, how do you define being committed? I feel I am committed, in the sense that I don't cheat, but does my life completely revolve around the other person? No, I'm still me.


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InvisibleRebel_At_War
REBEL
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Registered: 01/14/11
Posts: 785
Loc: Wherever the wind blows
Re: For all you people who don't commit, or who cheat, what's it like to be you? [Re: koraks]
    #15413449 - 11/23/11 03:02 PM (12 years, 2 months ago)

Interessting thread....Im loyal and comitted to my partner in the same way as OP described it, leaving a post cause id like to know the answer to this question aswell....

:popcorn:


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The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives his life to the fullest is prepared to die at any time...





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OfflineAll We Perceive
Sea Cucumber
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Registered: 09/24/07
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Re: For all you people who don't commit, or who cheat, what's it like to be you? [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #15413543 - 11/23/11 03:24 PM (12 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
For me, I just like being totally devoted to one person and I commit to them. I can masturbate if I have a sexual urge and I have no problem with controlling anything because I'm just simply a devoted person.

So for those of you who knowingly cheat or who have not been committed or something, what is it like for you? Why can't you or won't you commit? I'm just trying to see your perspective here.




I've been in a really non-relationship mood lately.  Different girls are like different flavors... or pokemon . .  or something.  I've been working on cultivating non-monogamous friends with benefits situations with varying success.  It's quite tough to pull off without emotions getting in the way :strokebeard:  I've also been having random one night stands here and there just to explore that as I was never really into that before.  I usually find them to be rather uncomfortable; maybe I'm just doing it wrong :justdontknow:  Either way, I'm 99.5% moving out of this shithole state called Florida in December / very early January so that has made the prospect of a relationship pretty dumb for me right now.  Either way, I make it VERY clear up front that I do not want a relationship and I just want to bone and maybe be friends so I do not feel like I am taking advantage of anyone.


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"plus they atually think jambands are good or sumthing, so they clearly know absolutely nothing about music, clearly lol" -Bassfreak


Edited by All We Perceive (11/23/11 03:26 PM)


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OfflineXUL
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Registered: 03/16/05
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Re: For all you people who don't commit, or who cheat, what's it like to be you? [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #15413623 - 11/23/11 03:42 PM (12 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
I'm someone who, when I'm in a relationship that is serious, I want to be committed, and if the other person does not, then I won't go forward with it until or unless they do want to.

For me, I just like being totally devoted to one person and I commit to them. I can masturbate if I have a sexual urge and I have no problem with controlling anything because I'm just simply a devoted person.

So for those of you who knowingly cheat or who have not been committed or something, what is it like for you? Why can't you or won't you commit? I'm just trying to see your perspective here.




I never commited for the longest time because I saw all my friends fighting with girls, getting their hearts broken, and causing a bunch of drama. For the longest time I saw women strictly as sex objects that I would find at parties and nothing more. Eventually one came along and I took her on a date. I liked her and eventually loved her.

Love is just like thestain on my underwear. A bunch of shit.

Hey Ananymous 1...

What if you search for commitement and love and never find it? And dont tell me you will. This is a hypothetical situation.

What do you do then?


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TRUMP 2020


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InvisibleRebel_At_War
REBEL
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Registered: 01/14/11
Posts: 785
Loc: Wherever the wind blows
Re: For all you people who don't commit, or who cheat, what's it like to be you? [Re: XUL]
    #15413828 - 11/23/11 04:42 PM (12 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

XUL said:
Quote:

Anonymous said:
I'm someone who, when I'm in a relationship that is serious, I want to be committed, and if the other person does not, then I won't go forward with it until or unless they do want to.

For me, I just like being totally devoted to one person and I commit to them. I can masturbate if I have a sexual urge and I have no problem with controlling anything because I'm just simply a devoted person.

So for those of you who knowingly cheat or who have not been committed or something, what is it like for you? Why can't you or won't you commit? I'm just trying to see your perspective here.




I never commited for the longest time because I saw all my friends fighting with girls, getting their hearts broken, and causing a bunch of drama. For the longest time I saw women strictly as sex objects that I would find at parties and nothing more. Eventually one came along and I took her on a date. I liked her and eventually loved her.

Love is just like thestain on my underwear. A bunch of shit.

Hey Ananymous 1...

What if you search for commitement and love and never find it? And dont tell me you will. This is a hypothetical situation.

What do you do then?





Sucks to hear that dude...

Well, ive heard that in order to find great love, one have to make great risks. This means u may have to get ur heart broken at some point (most probably) I think the key is to not give up on love.. I searched a GOOD while with a lot of bad luck, and though i kept my heart open for the possibility to come, i actually STOPPED looking right before i found a suitable partner to be comitted to. It might come, it might not, but unless you are open to it i guess u ruin the chanses for yourself... Another phrase i have heard is " you have to love yourself before anyone else can love you" or something similar anyways, it makes sense to me that unless you are truly happy with yourself how can anyone else be? (Unless theyr truly as miserable themself i guess, which would make up a pretty shitty relationship...)

:shrug:


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The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives his life to the fullest is prepared to die at any time...





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Invisibledr_gonz
Registered: 08/18/03
Posts: 44,654
. [Re: XUL]
    #15413832 - 11/23/11 04:43 PM (12 years, 2 months ago)

.


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OfflineAnonymousRabbit
Comrade
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Registered: 01/10/08
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Last seen: 1 year, 4 months
. [Re: dr_gonz]
    #15420721 - 11/25/11 03:00 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

.


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.


Edited by AnonymousRabbit (05/18/22 04:40 PM)


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OfflineAnonymousRabbit
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Registered: 01/10/08
Posts: 8,993
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. [Re: AnonymousRabbit]
    #15420725 - 11/25/11 03:02 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

.


--------------------
.


Edited by AnonymousRabbit (05/18/22 04:40 PM)


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InvisibleRebel_At_War
REBEL
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Registered: 01/14/11
Posts: 785
Loc: Wherever the wind blows
Re: For all you people who don't commit, or who cheat, what's it like to be you? [Re: AnonymousRabbit]
    #15421034 - 11/25/11 07:58 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

supernovasky said:
By the way, is it horrible that I flirt while in a committed relationship?

I just kind of get a kick out of it, and most of the time the girl is honestly more pleased and takes it as a compliment... and it keeps my game up for when I eventually do separate from my ex girlfriends.




If your girl dont mind it, its not horrible at all... If she didnt like it, then that would be a diffrent story...


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The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives his life to the fullest is prepared to die at any time...





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Anonymous #3

Re: For all you people who don't commit, or who cheat, what's it like to be you? [Re: Rebel_At_War]
    #15423988 - 11/25/11 09:27 PM (12 years, 2 months ago)

Male here.

I met a girl who I hit it off with from the beginning. We went drinking once and ended up kissing. We hung out a few times after that and we hooked up. She told me that she wasn't interested in relationships or commitment.

Well we started really liking each other, and she started liking me more than just a fling. So basically I gave her an ultimatum that she if she wanted to hook up with other guys we were done.

So yeah now we're in a committed fling which is actually pretty good. It's like an unofficial relationship.

Or at least I think we're still in one, might be over, I'll find out soon I guess.

What I'm saying is that I think commitment is really important. When I'm involved with a girl I like, I have no desire for anyone else because no one could be better than her. There wouldn't be any point. As soon as I start thinking about other girls I break it off.


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Anonymous #4

Re: For all you people who don't commit, or who cheat, what's it like to be you? [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #15425431 - 11/26/11 08:28 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:


So for those of you who knowingly cheat or who have not been committed or something, what is it like for you? Why can't you or won't you commit? I'm just trying to see your perspective here.



Trust issues, lack of faith and impulse control. I'm sure there's other things too...


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InvisibleNemo_Hoes
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Posts: 39,721
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Re: For all you people who don't commit, or who cheat, what's it like to be you? [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #15426026 - 11/26/11 11:58 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

COS I'M A FUCKIN DOG WOOF WOOF WOOF


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We will also report to the NAACP and to Al Sharpton's entourage, how the Shroomery administrators allows their mods and members to be balatantly allowed the use of the 'N' word.


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InvisibleMisterMuscaria
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Re: For all you people who don't commit, or who cheat, what's it like to be you? [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #15432022 - 11/27/11 06:20 PM (12 years, 2 months ago)

Ive always been afraid of commitment but I think Im finally over that issue...and willing to try it out...I just cant seem to find someone else who wants to commit to me and dont even know how to go about it.


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Offlinefbi365
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Re: For all you people who don't commit, or who cheat, what's it like to be you? [Re: MisterMuscaria]
    #15432146 - 11/27/11 06:39 PM (12 years, 2 months ago)

Because I don't know anybody who wants that.  All of the girls I know just want to fool around. 

I like a couple of them.  But they just don't like me the same.  Whaddaya gonna do? :justdontknow:


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InvisibleMisterMuscaria
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Re: For all you people who don't commit, or who cheat, what's it like to be you? [Re: fbi365]
    #15432163 - 11/27/11 06:42 PM (12 years, 2 months ago)

Nothin really to do.
:shrug:

I think people dont think about commitment until theyve known someone for a while...my problem is sustaining relations that long without going "fuck it" and looking for someone else.


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InvisibleCounterCulturest
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Registered: 01/18/10
Posts: 3,662
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Re: For all you people who don't commit, or who cheat, what's it like to be you? [Re: MisterMuscaria]
    #15433333 - 11/27/11 10:34 PM (12 years, 2 months ago)

That's where my problems with relationships happen as well. I'm all down for being 100% trustworthy and a faithful partner. Cheating just isn't in my stars. But when a girls want's to become my #1 priority.. it's like NO WAY. I have way to much going for me right now to jeopardize on you. And they take that the wrong way, which I can understand. And I don't want to become anyones #1 priority either. I'm all about teaming-up with a girl and getting some ground covered and experiencing some new things along the way but I'm just not down tot a baby around with me. When I do wan't to take care of a baby and nurture another human being, I will either adopt or foster a child.

As for cheaters. The thought of being cheated on makes my stomach curl. But I understand why people do it. Because we are all so different ya know ? To you and I, op, our sex drives come second to being faithful and building a stable relationship. But for people who have a high sex drive and lack of care for the latter it's obvious that they get more gratification from having sex with someone else. And honestly I think a lot of people can't control it. I know plenty of caring and compassionate people who have cheated. Sexuality is a powerful drug. We all know when you get all heated up that you aren't thinking straight. Those hormones will do the thinking for you. Us humans are dirty dirty creatures....

That's why I would just stay away from woman who are likely to do such a thing. I guess you would never know until it happened but there are signs that help you see someones move before they make it ya know ?


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InvisibleRebel_At_War
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Re: For all you people who don't commit, or who cheat, what's it like to be you? [Re: fbi365]
    #15434031 - 11/28/11 03:22 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

fbi365 said:
Because I don't know anybody who wants that.  All of the girls I know just want to fool around. 

I like a couple of them.  But they just don't like me the same.  Whaddaya gonna do? :justdontknow:




Dont give up guys...

You might be looking in the wrong places, there is tonnes of girls out there looking for a descent relationship, but most likely u wont find them in the clubs ect.. (Not saying thats where ur looking just an example of where not to look)

Try to go out and meet new people, go to the library, maybe get into a conversation with someone randomly in the store, be sure you dont send off signals that u are looking for someone to fool around with.. Maybe stop spending a lot of time with those that do want to fool around, as they might keep u distracted from a possible partner passing u by. U never know who might come along.


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The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives his life to the fullest is prepared to die at any time...





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InvisibleRebel_At_War
REBEL
Female


Registered: 01/14/11
Posts: 785
Loc: Wherever the wind blows
Re: For all you people who don't commit, or who cheat, what's it like to be you? [Re: Rebel_At_War]
    #15434044 - 11/28/11 03:34 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

Ps. Also want to say keep in mind guys that u can often (not always) tell on peoples way of behaviour and looks what they are like. "Good girls" are often shy, or silent, and dont always do to much to stick out and/or crave attention. (by this i mean heavy makeup, sexy clothes ect)

Maybe just the quiet girl next door who never really seem to pay you much attention.? Talk to her..!

Treat a lady like a lady, and not like some girl your trying to fool around with, give her patience and show her that you keep your concentration on her and not every other girl passing by, keep conversations up without letting your urges get a hold of you, or atleast try to hide it for as long as possible. Let her know you are willing to invest in her, and your ready to make sacrifices and be comitted.  This usually brings a proper partnertype around to open up...

Just an advice. This isent working or true in ALL cases, but if u dont know how to do it, or where to look, this would surely help u on your way..

:peace:


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The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives his life to the fullest is prepared to die at any time...





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