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TTT
Cultivate the inside


Registered: 08/07/06
Posts: 4,340
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Re: I CAN'T BELIEVE my girlfriend did this to me... [Re: rainx]
#15165641 - 10/02/11 07:30 AM (12 years, 5 months ago) |
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I think you're overreacting.
If she does cheat on you you know what to do. Making this an issue will destroy you guys anyway so why bother trying to keep something going you no longer have enough trust to maintain?
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birdland

Registered: 07/24/11
Posts: 2,202
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Re: I CAN'T BELIEVE my girlfriend did this to me... [Re: TTT]
#15165779 - 10/02/11 08:24 AM (12 years, 5 months ago) |
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dump her
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koraks
Registered: 06/02/03
Posts: 26,691
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Re: I CAN'T BELIEVE my girlfriend did this to me... [Re: eworop]
#15165824 - 10/02/11 08:35 AM (12 years, 5 months ago) |
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I assume you have confronted her with the fact that this makes you feel that she damages the fragile trust between the two of you, right? If not, do so. If you did: how did she respond? Also, does she hang out with a lot of guys (playing vid games or whatever), or is this something that she normally doesn't do? In any case, she could (should) have been smart enough to understand that this, whatever her intentions, doesn't go down very well with you. If she doesn't understand that, then explain it to her.
In any case, this doesn't look particularly good, but I agree with TTT: don't overreact; don't let the jealousy take complete control over you. But be very very cautious, because in my opinion and experience Humility and one other user are also right: some people are compulsive cheaters - they appear to be not capable of dealing with monogamous relationships.
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rjreynoldsinc
Jack of all trades


Registered: 09/10/10
Posts: 459
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Re: I CAN'T BELIEVE my girlfriend did this to me... [Re: eworop]
#15165835 - 10/02/11 08:39 AM (12 years, 5 months ago) |
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i was with her 3 years man and the last years was the worst it took a year just to grow balls and get the courage up to tell her
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fngbronco
Monkey Man



Registered: 09/26/10
Posts: 2,877
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Re: I CAN'T BELIEVE my girlfriend did this to me... [Re: rjreynoldsinc]
#15166966 - 10/02/11 01:10 PM (12 years, 4 months ago) |
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Man, it's funny to me to see people who really don't trust people. My gf has gone and hung out with my buddies (albeit never 1 on 1, but that wouldn't bug me) and I've never in my life been paranoid about them doing anything. I've hung out with my good friend's wife (who's beautiful, but truly like a sister) and never thought of doing anything.
Your gf very well could've been playing video games, just ask her to let you know next time if she's having people come over (out of respect for you) so you don't walk in on this kinda stuff.
Best of luck, and hopefully the truth was told!
-------------------- I challenge you to challenge yourself more! When you feel complacent and ready to hang it up, challenge yourself to get over it! If you fail, don't look at it as you didn't succeed, look at it as you would a rock face you're trying to climb. Stand back, wayyyy back, and look at it and plot another path. If you can't find one, shuffle down the way a little, a little change of scenery or a view from a different angle may give you the insight you need. Anything I state is relayed information from a friend of a friend and should be viewed as completely fictitious. I do not partake in any illegal or grey-area-of-the-law activities, but do have lots of friends who may or may not. -fngbronco Pill Divider Agar Tek
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rainx
Pilgrim



Registered: 07/31/11
Posts: 146
Loc: Seattle
Last seen: 6 years, 2 months
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Re: I CAN'T BELIEVE my girlfriend did this to me... [Re: fngbronco]
#15168205 - 10/02/11 05:52 PM (12 years, 4 months ago) |
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"Man, it's funny to me to see people who really don't trust people."
I trust people to be PEOPLE!
We need a sense of humor and a realistic expectation of human foibles. We are indeed a strange species.
Always be ready to rely upon yourself. At the end game that is all you will have...guaranteed.
Women will come and go...many will never speak to you again!
Love and Gold....
-------------------- "The Gospel of Sri Ramakrishna" is best source of insight into the self, universe, and the entheogen catalyzed experience. Forward by Aldous Huxley.
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domite
Puppet

Registered: 04/12/03
Posts: 2,978
Loc: Who's askin'?
Last seen: 10 years, 6 months
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Re: I CAN'T BELIEVE my girlfriend did this to me... [Re: rainx] 1
#15169279 - 10/02/11 09:56 PM (12 years, 4 months ago) |
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If you got back together with her after she cheated, that's the same as giving her permission to cheat.

Mallow says: dump the bitch and find your pride!
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koraks
Registered: 06/02/03
Posts: 26,691
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Re: I CAN'T BELIEVE my girlfriend did this to me... [Re: domite]
#15170072 - 10/03/11 02:19 AM (12 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
domite said: If you got back together with her after she cheated, that's the same as giving her permission to cheat.
No, it isn't. I see what you mean, but I certainly wouldn't put it that way.
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Faaip_De_Oiad
as above, so below



Registered: 05/29/01
Posts: 1,947
Loc: Malice, Tx
Last seen: 1 year, 5 months
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Re: I CAN'T BELIEVE my girlfriend did this to me... [Re: koraks]
#15172681 - 10/03/11 04:49 PM (12 years, 4 months ago) |
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that chick doesn't deserve another chance IMO.
but I agree with what the others here have said, if there's no trust then you got nothing.
There's no point in dragging something out if you don't think you can trust her anymore.
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blkjkrabbit

Registered: 07/22/07
Posts: 4,971
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Re: I CAN'T BELIEVE my girlfriend did this to me... [Re: Faaip_De_Oiad]
#15172906 - 10/03/11 05:37 PM (12 years, 4 months ago) |
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yeah I'd boot her ass for just not telling me something that sketchy. fuck their pathetic alibi they think you're a fucking idiot that they can walk all over
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SuperD
Cacti junky


Registered: 10/05/03
Posts: 6,648
Loc: The bridgesii bridge
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Re: I CAN'T BELIEVE my girlfriend did this to me... [Re: eworop]
#15172977 - 10/03/11 05:52 PM (12 years, 4 months ago) |
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I am single and loving life so much right now. I feel so sorry for my fellow guys out there that can't stand the thought of being alone, or whatever other reason there is for them always wanting to be chained down by women. I value my freedom more than anything else and perhaps that is why I refuse to get into another relationship. But that's just me, and we're all different.
OP, you really need to contemplate the right thing to do in this situation. The ironic thing about your story is that your girl told you the truth about her being a liar. She mentioned you would have never known that guy came over to 'play video games' had you not found out first hand. How many other guys have been over to your place 'playing video games' while you worked overtime or were not there with her for hours on end?
If I ever found out a girl cheated on me, first love or not, she would be out on the street. We as a culture value virginity more than so many other places around the world, so naturally some of us will want to cherish the moment and try to make things work out with our first love. Stand up for yourself and find another woman that will be with you and only you while you're in a relationship together. There are countless single women out there right at this very moment that would love to find someone like you. Tell this cheater and liar that you're breaking up with her then take a little time to recover mentally from the breakup, and then go get you someone that you deserves your attention and affection.
--------------------
   D Manoa said: I need to stop spending all my money on plants and take up a cheaper hobby, like heroin. Looking for Rauhocereus riosaniensis seeds or live specimen(s), me if you have any for trade
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Showmehow420
Relearning the basics



Registered: 04/18/11
Posts: 733
Loc: Michigan
Last seen: 1 year, 11 days
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Re: I CAN'T BELIEVE my girlfriend did this to me... [Re: SuperD]
#15173914 - 10/03/11 08:27 PM (12 years, 4 months ago) |
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Dude we all have been there and ended up not dumping her and it will end up happening again. She is looking for an excuse to. My wife did it to me and promise it happens to all of us bro. Just get her shit out. I know its hard but you gotta do what you gotta do. IF you arent happy you cant make her happy and its just a vicious cycle over and over and over again, listen to all of our advice thats why you are here remember. It does know good to ask for advice and not take it ya know?
I hope it all works out and remember just "pull the trigger" and get it done with. Faster it ends the faster you can find someone else to have waaaaaaaay more fun with.
--------------------
 Trade List
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
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Re: I CAN'T BELIEVE my girlfriend did this to me... [Re: eworop]
#15173967 - 10/03/11 08:34 PM (12 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
eworop said:
Quote:
sonorandose said: he was there all night, playing video games?
He was there for an hour, I actually know the dude and trust his intentions, my girlfriend is the one I can't trust.
I honestly don't think anything happened but I just feel insanely disrespected, and now how am I supposed to feel comfortable even going to work if i know she is willing to hide things from me?! She even admitted if I didn't find out, she wouldn't have ever told me - kind of like with the cheating... Disgusts me
Sucker is the correct term here.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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withoutawire
hi


Registered: 08/16/09
Posts: 11,384
Loc: Honolulu, Hawaii
Last seen: 8 months, 17 days
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Re: I CAN'T BELIEVE my girlfriend did this to me... [Re: eworop]
#15183353 - 10/05/11 08:07 PM (12 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
eworop said: So I have dated my current girlfriend for around a year and a half, and have just started slightly getting over being cheated on. I decided to forgive her and let her have one more chance to prove she is worth it.
After a long night shift of working my ass off, I come home a bit earlier than expected, and there is a guy sitting on my couch with my girlfriend.
I can't believe after forgiving her, and when our relationship is hanging by a thread, she is willing to do things behind my back.
I have met the guy before and really don't believe he has bad intentions, he told me she just invited him over to play video games.
But seriously, who the FUCK goes around hanging out with another guy in MY HOUSE without telling me. Biggest slap in the face ever
Ya I can't do cheater, at all.
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Humility
Working on it



Registered: 10/07/08
Posts: 6,745
Last seen: 7 years, 11 days
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Re: I CAN'T BELIEVE my girlfriend did this to me... [Re: withoutawire]
#15185348 - 10/06/11 08:12 AM (12 years, 4 months ago) |
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Also wtf is wrong with playing video games with someone on the couch? This should be simple.
If you trust her, drop this bullshit. If you don't, drop her. If you're feeling insecure or concerned make that known to her. Keep in mind though that that's YOUR problem as much as it is hers. There is NOTHING wrong with sitting on a couch playing video games with someone, whether they have a vagina or a penis unless you BOTH agree that there is.
My girl isn't going to tell me I can't play video games with another girl. Fuck that.
Trust is very important. Don't be naive however.
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mellowparty
legitimate researcher


Registered: 05/17/09
Posts: 18,467
Last seen: 10 years, 3 months
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Re: I CAN'T BELIEVE my girlfriend did this to me... [Re: Humility]
#15185552 - 10/06/11 09:12 AM (12 years, 4 months ago) |
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Well OP can always pretend he is ok with it and just try to fuck her as much as possible and cheat at the same time. Get as much pussy as possible in a nutshell.
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