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Offlinetimelapses
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Re: Then new durnkard thread (only for the hard drinkers please, no moderates". [Re: TwistedByDesign]
    #14800110 - 07/20/11 08:36 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

Primus, and a great buzz.  Everything is right in the world tonight.:awesomenod:


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Offlinetimelapses
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Re: Then new durnkard thread (only for the hard drinkers please, no moderates". [Re: timelapses]
    #14800162 - 07/20/11 08:44 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

Dear Concerned Cad:

Here’s the scenario: I came home after the bars had shut and took quick stock of the fridge. My roommate had left a single bottle of Guinness in plain view, but a little digging turned up two cans of Old Style artfully hidden in Chinese takeout containers. I found myself at a total loss and couldn’t bring myself to drink any of the beer. When he came home half an hour later, he drank the Guinness in front of me and never mentioned the Old Styles. How would you have handled the situation?

—Paralyzed in Pittsburgh



Dear Paralyzed:

I have to salute the diabolical bastard — your roommate is plainly a genius of Machiavellian stature.

He obviously left out the good beer because he knows you aren’t crass enough to violate the “you can’t drink his last beer” rule, and hid the lesser beers because he figured that with a king right up front you wouldn’t go digging for pawns. On the next level, he assumed that if you did find the hidden beers, you’d be afraid of making yourself vulnerable to his well-laid Sneak Thief Trap: “Dude, I left the Guinness out for you so you wouldn’t have to pilfer my private stash.” Which makes him look like a prince and you like a bum.

Let’s face it: he played you like a cheap Victrola.

So, how should you have handled it? You should have drank the lesser beers. Both of them. It’s a sacrifice play. He would have punished you with his trap, but you would have effectively removed the King Defense from his arsenal—you could thereafter drink any last beer left in the open because he set the precedent of it being a sacrificial lamb used to protect hidden beers. Even if there aren’t any.

All that said, buy some beer for the fridge. If you want to play, you have to bring some chips to the table.


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InvisibleModularMind
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Re: Then new durnkard thread (only for the hard drinkers please, no moderates". [Re: timelapses]
    #14800264 - 07/20/11 09:03 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

I'm out of beer and going to walk to the bar.
Fuck OP and his ignorant sally-ass-ory.

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OfflineFuzedBox
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Re: Then new durnkard thread (only for the hard drinkers please, no moderates [Re: ModularMind]
    #14800277 - 07/20/11 09:07 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

I find New Amsterdam to be a great budget "gin"; extremely smoothe. Trying to kick this recent alcoholism, though...

:feelsbadman:

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InvisibleModularMind
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Re: Then new durnkard thread (only for the hard drinkers please, no moderates [Re: FuzedBox]
    #14800302 - 07/20/11 09:11 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

It comes in waves, doesn't it?

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Offlinetimelapses
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Re: Then new durnkard thread (only for the hard drinkers please, no moderates [Re: FuzedBox]
    #14800467 - 07/20/11 09:42 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

So go a week without drinking, does wonders for your tolerance if yoiu have the willpower.  THE WILL.


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Offlinetripp23
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Re: Then new durnkard thread (only for the hard drinkers please, no moderates". [Re: ModularMind]
    #14800541 - 07/20/11 09:56 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

Ive never been the partier type in highschool but i gots me a story.  when i was 17, 2007, a junior in highscool.

before i got drunk: my buddy picked us up at a church because my dads nuts n he woulda flipped if he seen my buddy pick me n my friend up that was at my house with me. my buddy picks us up, we pull out onto a side street and get pulled over. right before this, we told my buddy that was driving to get us 4 pints of smirnoff pure vodka. he kept the alccohol right under his feet while driving.

so as this cops walking up, he tried to shove it under his seat. doesnt budge. finally, right when the cops flashlight hits the door, he decided to pull the seat back n shove it under. he didnt see that happen. luckily he let us off without anything but seeing as we were all underage at the time woulda landed us in some major shit. it was nuts. lol

anyways, we get to my buddys house that came with me.  i just start slamming this vodka like crazy. drank a pint and a half of this shit completely straight and im pretty light. about 165lbs, 6'0 ft. by about midnight, im lit. i puke up about two times. my visions scattered, cant see strraight at all.  right after i puke, my hands begin to go completely numb. i couldnt move em at all. i began to repeat, "my hands are goin numb!! my hands are going numb, i cant move or feel em!!" so i thought, i just want this shit outta my system. "get me water quick!" my buddy hands me water and now..

in order to pick this up and drink it.. i had to use both insides of my wrists because i couldnt move any fingers or my hands at all.. i thought i was on the verge of dying.. they were tingling, blue, lifeless limbs at that point. i sat back and about 5 mins goes by. i puke another 3-4 times. drink more water and sat back for another 3-4 mins. puked, repeated a few times. finally, i laid down and passed out for about an hour. i woke up and moved my hands perfectly, like it never happened.

after that, i slowed my role alot. never got that fucked up again.. never will. sorry it was long, hope u enjoyed my poisoning near death experience.


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Experience my nightmarish first time of smoking Ganja!


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Offlinebbt0009
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Re: Then new durnkard thread (only for the hard drinkers please, no moderates". [Re: tripp23]
    #14800737 - 07/20/11 10:40 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

Dos Equis seems to do the trick for me. Miller lite after that then Coors Lite.

I like my violence like i like my beer.... Domestic..


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It was all a dream...

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Offlinebbt0009
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Re: Then new durnkard thread (only for the hard drinkers please, no moderates". [Re: tripp23]
    #14800745 - 07/20/11 10:43 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

tripp23 said:
Ive never been the partier type in highschool but i gots me a story.  when i was 17, 2007, a junior in highscool.

before i got drunk: my buddy picked us up at a church because my dads nuts n he woulda flipped if he seen my buddy pick me n my friend up that was at my house with me. my buddy picks us up, we pull out onto a side street and get pulled over. right before this, we told my buddy that was driving to get us 4 pints of smirnoff pure vodka. he kept the alccohol right under his feet while driving.

so as this cops walking up, he tried to shove it under his seat. doesnt budge. finally, right when the cops flashlight hits the door, he decided to pull the seat back n shove it under. he didnt see that happen. luckily he let us off without anything but seeing as we were all underage at the time woulda landed us in some major shit. it was nuts. lol

anyways, we get to my buddys house that came with me.  i just start slamming this vodka like crazy. drank a pint and a half of this shit completely straight and im pretty light. about 165lbs, 6'0 ft. by about midnight, im lit. i puke up about two times. my visions scattered, cant see strraight at all.  right after i puke, my hands begin to go completely numb. i couldnt move em at all. i began to repeat, "my hands are goin numb!! my hands are going numb, i cant move or feel em!!" so i thought, i just want this shit outta my system. "get me water quick!" my buddy hands me water and now..

in order to pick this up and drink it.. i had to use both insides of my wrists because i couldnt move any fingers or my hands at all.. i thought i was on the verge of dying.. they were tingling, blue, lifeless limbs at that point. i sat back and about 5 mins goes by. i puke another 3-4 times. drink more water and sat back for another 3-4 mins. puked, repeated a few times. finally, i laid down and passed out for about an hour. i woke up and moved my hands perfectly, like it never happened.

after that, i slowed my role alot. never got that fucked up again.. never will. sorry it was long, hope u enjoyed my poisoning near death experience.



Moderation is key. When i was that age i remember slamming 6 shots of jack then drinking half a pint straight. Went to a party. By the time we got there i was so throwed we had to leave and i threw up out the window the whole way home lol. Had to scrub my bro's car down the next day


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It was all a dream...

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Offlinetripp23
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Re: Then new durnkard thread (only for the hard drinkers please, no moderates". [Re: bbt0009]
    #14802435 - 07/21/11 10:05 AM (12 years, 7 months ago)

yea. i definately know my limits now :lol:


--------------------
Experience my nightmarish first time of smoking Ganja!


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Offlinetimelapses
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Re: Then new durnkard thread (only for the hard drinkers please, no moderates". [Re: tripp23]
    #14808377 - 07/22/11 12:03 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

Breakfast of champions.  Benzo and alcohol.  Someone came up with the absurd notion that if you drink before noon you are an alcoholic.  I strongly disagree with that statement.


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InvisibleLobsterSauceDiscord
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Re: Then new durnkard thread (only for the hard drinkers please, no moderates". [Re: timelapses]
    #14808389 - 07/22/11 12:05 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

A gentleman never drinks before sundown :superiority:

I've a small party to go tonight, 5e bottle of jager rip off with energy drinks will be had.

Then into town for a feed of drinks and maybe more.


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Offlinetimelapses
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Re: Then new durnkard thread (only for the hard drinkers please, no moderates". [Re: LobsterSauce]
    #14808708 - 07/22/11 01:08 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

"A gentleman never drinks before sundown".

God that's a long time to wait unless you have to work or be around people sober.  Hope your get together goes well.:sunny:


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OfflineDrMambo
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Re: Then new durnkard thread (only for the hard drinkers please, no moderates". [Re: LobsterSauce]
    #14811194 - 07/22/11 10:15 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

bartender poured me heavy last night


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"Yeah, he's a professor...... OF BEING A DOG!"

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Offlinetimelapses
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Re: Then new durnkard thread (only for the hard drinkers please, no moderates". [Re: timelapses]
    #14811219 - 07/22/11 10:20 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

Drinking to depression and bad relationships.  My mood is lightening by each sip.:sun:  SUNNY SKIES AHEAD.


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InvisibleSophistic Radiance
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Re: Then new durnkard thread (only for the hard drinkers please, no moderates". [Re: timelapses]
    #14811263 - 07/22/11 10:30 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

I've had a rough couple days. I'd fallen in love with one of my friends with benefits, then she went and got a monogamous boyfriend. :facepalm:

Only just came around to it and talked it out with her yesterday.

:zomgwtf: THE FUCKING PAIN IS UNBEARABLE

:restless:


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Enlil said:
You really are the worst kind of person.


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OfflineDrMambo
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Re: Then new durnkard thread (only for the hard drinkers please, no moderates". [Re: Sophistic Radiance]
    #14811278 - 07/22/11 10:34 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

chugalug, broskiff

apparently the one bartender who I've been riding home from work with and who has started rebounding is being described as, "being completely reckless with her booze and actions"

:naughty:


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"Yeah, he's a professor...... OF BEING A DOG!"

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Invisibleohmatic
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Re: Then new durnkard thread (only for the hard drinkers please, no moderates". [Re: DrMambo]
    #14811957 - 07/23/11 02:33 AM (12 years, 7 months ago)

fuaaaark drinking on my own a lot these days, yesterday slammed like 8 beers while watching the dark knight,
i DO NOT LIKE where this is going - argh ..


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:penis: MONOTUB tek :sun: HEATBOMB tek :penis:

RIP #cultivation! ....can't associate? well FUCK U !

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Offlinetimelapses
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Re: Then new durnkard thread (only for the hard drinkers please, no moderates". [Re: ohmatic]
    #14812819 - 07/23/11 10:25 AM (12 years, 7 months ago)

lol, relating to the character or just concerned about drinking to much?


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OfflineJT
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Re: Then new durnkard thread (only for the hard drinkers please, no moderates". [Re: timelapses]
    #14815271 - 07/23/11 08:38 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

i usually enjoy yellowtail's white wines, and saw a new release from them called Moscato. grabbed it without reading the label, just thought it looked good.

this is the sickliest sweet piss tasting swill i've ever bought, and even worse, i realized when i got home that it's only 7.5%. fucking fail.

any white wine fans here?

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