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LSDemon
Stranger

Registered: 10/22/10
Posts: 4
Last seen: 12 years, 7 months
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4g dry- consumed by an unspeakable abyss while maintaining the 5 senses.
#14559799 - 06/04/11 12:04 PM (12 years, 7 months ago) |
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This is my third experience with the fungi and it was the most intense experience of my life. Im truly happy to be back after whatever happened to me. I would call this experience the strangest I have ever been through by far because I truly cannot accurately describe what happened with human language. I will try to use metaphors to give an idea of the otherly abyss that consumed me.
I use mushrooms as a tool to grow spiritually and experience the unspeakable. I don't like to trip outside during the day or with other people. I feel like silent darkness is necessary to bring out what the mushroom truly is, as Terence Mckenna claims.
I write this at 8:36am the morning after the trip. I sit here extremely grateful for my sanity. Last night I eat the 4g of most caps and a few stems around 9:15pm. My best friend X is my sitter tonight, he plans on taking the same unknown strain of mushrooms tonight and I will spot him. I fasted for about 6 hours to get a full on effect. Right before I begin to munch them down, I state my intentions. Out loud I say," I want to see the mushroom for what it is, I come in peace and want to learn what the mushroom has to offer." Man was I not ready for what was about to come.
I felt almost instant nausea when I ate the mushrooms so I took a bong rip of some Sour Skywalker OG kush. This settled my stomach enough so I could relax and focus on something other than the intense physical aspects of the come up. We listened to a few Terence Mckenna youtube videos, he inspires me and his talks get me in the mood for exploring the edges. Around 10PM I started to feel it coming on so X shuts off the lights. I lay in my bed and he lays on the couch next to me. The last thing I remember before it hit is me saying,"Im holding nothing back please don't burn me" (Terence Mckenna quote.)
From when the trip hits to when I come down, time was non-existent. Also, I had barely any visual hallucinations. Smoking cannabis can give me stronger hallucinations. The only visuals I saw were faint shadowy figures embedded in the darkness of the room and my closed eyelids. The content of these faint hallucinations puzzled me it was very primal yet alien at times. During the whole trip I had my normal 5 senses, and everything in the room felt surprisingly "normal". There was a party going on a couple doors down and I could clearly hear it this entire time, I was literally experiencing this world as it is normally on top of my trip basically. Also, during this entire experience I am talking coherently to X attempting to express the unspeakable before it slips away.
I remember feeling the massive potential build up in my stomach and limbs which hinted me about the intensity of the otherness about to completely consume my being. There was a bizarre, eerie emotion behind this whole journey. It still creeps me out right now. As it hits me my ego is instantly crushed, and I remember a true sense of real death. It wasn't really good or bad, it was just so convincingly real and strange. The eeriness was SO intense. There was an odd plotted aspect to this trip. It's like everything in my life built up to this moment. I knew this is what's in store for me one day, it was so convincingly real. The ego death was most intense at first and and the rest of the trip was a loop of this "pushing and pulling". When it hit I was the farthest I could go and I knew it. The loop was my mind in this other place/void/unspeakable abyss pushing and pulling back to this reality. The strangest thing is I am coherently speaking to my friend and sensing the room with my eyes open and closed. I talked the entire time literally, saying things like wow this is INSANE. OMG!!! I CANT EXPLAIN THIS!! And as time went on I feared I would never come down. The grip of this otherness that was taking over my mind was so intense and different from everything I have experienced and heard experienced before. The intensity,eeriness,and unspeakable-ness had such a strong hold on me I truly thought I would never come back. So many boundaries were being dissolved at impossible speeds. It's really hard to put this in order also because these loops weren't based on time it was under completely unspeakable laws of nature. The only way I can structure it in language is a loop of pushing and pulling back and forth and each loop I literally became less spaced out. The pushing and pulling was also EXTREMELY PHYSICAL. When I would get caught in the strangeness too much my stomach would feel like its dying. I also remember how I was also receiving thoughts coming from somewhere else while I was using my normal sober ego mind. The paradoxes were so extreme. The content of the info I was receiving was so strange and other that I cant put it in words, simple as that. I remember feeling a sense of danger to our species in the Earth at times as well.
I kept asking X over and over what time is was when I was down enough to remember time. I was trying the best I could to navigate back even though I was already back. I remember X went to the bathroom and I sat up crossed my legs and chanted the mantra Om Mani Padme Hum to try and steer this thing back on track but I soon realized this was powerless because this otherness had that strong of a hold on me. I just kept looking around the room and closing my eyes seeing this faint shadow hallucinations in the darkness, rolling around in the bed, trying to understand what's happening with my mind.
At times when the mental "loop" would focus more on "this world" I would hear a brief moment of a Radiohead song replaying in my head. I don't listen to them much I have no idea what song it was. The audio hallucinations were similar to my last 4g trip. The aggressive humming and synth like sounds that feel like they are coming from another entity, slowly taking over my being. I also remember a brief mellow section of a trance/dubstep song repeating in my head. That sound was also somehow tying into these synth like audio hallucinations I was getting, but I don't know how or why. Somehow these two brief sections of these songs helped me come back and relate to reality, even though I was experiencing "baseline reality" at the same. It simply didnt make sense.
The loops of pushing and pulling on my physical body and unexplainable language machinery in my mind stopped around 1-130AM. I ate 4g of potent mushrooms at 9:15PM and around 4 hours later I am really down. This amazed me. When I came down enough that the loop let me go, I remember crying and feeling and intense sense of gratefulness for my life. I truly still can't believe I made it out of that- whatever it was. Even though I was "back" the eerie, strange, bizarre vibes surrounded me until I fell asleep.
I sit here now at 10:57AM in utter awe. I feel like I barely avoided drifting off into madness forever. Im so happy to be back and I don't feel any kind of physical symptoms which is really strange. It all almost seems like a dream now, or a memory of a memory of a memory, but I can still remember and grasp the immense, strange unspeakable abyss that almost took me away forever.
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ant61


Registered: 10/26/03
Posts: 1,186
Loc: colorado
Last seen: 16 days, 19 hours
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Re: 4g dry- consumed by an unspeakable abyss while maintaining the 5 senses. [Re: LSDemon]
#14559850 - 06/04/11 12:18 PM (12 years, 7 months ago) |
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wow,intense, reminds me of my first dip in the galactic pool. it shook me to the core, sounds like your processing everything, oh and damn good report, nice writing
Edited by ant61 (06/04/11 12:19 PM)
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LSDemon
Stranger

Registered: 10/22/10
Posts: 4
Last seen: 12 years, 7 months
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Re: 4g dry- consumed by an unspeakable abyss while maintaining the 5 senses. [Re: ant61]
#14559962 - 06/04/11 12:54 PM (12 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
ant61 said: wow,intense, reminds me of my first dip in the galactic pool. it shook me to the core, sounds like your processing everything, oh and damn good report, nice writing
Thanks for the quick response and compliment on the report! I appreciate it mang. I am just sitting in awe still so happy to be alive. Thanks for reading.
I also actually found the dubstep song that was beaming through me it was just a loop of the beginning trance part. [url=http://http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IY4P0Jsef3w]http:///url] It's called broken string. how eerie
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