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Anonymous #1

Social Anxiety
    #14502014 - 05/23/11 11:19 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

I can't stand crowded places, I suddenly get the urge to leave and go somewhere quiet to be alone. I'm often afraid to leave my house. For several months I thought I was overcoming this anxiety, I got a job and built an active social life, but lately it's been coming back strong. Today was the worst. When going out in public I couldn't stop sweating and it was hard to breathe. Lately I need to will myself to even go out with close friends. I'm afraid of making a permanent impression on every person I meet.

This is purely psychological and I've been searching for a long-term solution with no luck... Weed seems to help but I  haven't smoked for a few weeks... I tried an SSRI for a period of time but it felt numbing and deep down I had a strong moral opposition to it, and also fears about health effects I read of.

For those of you with social anxiety, what do you do to fight it?


Edited by Anonymous (05/27/11 12:11 AM)


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Invisiblep_walter
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Re: Social Anxiety [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #14502067 - 05/23/11 11:36 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Alcohol. Also, I occasionally get really fucking chatty while tripping, though I have very little (conscious) control over the things coming out of my mouth, so I tend to just scare off strangers rather than make new friends :p

[Edit:] I will say that my social anxiety isn't nearly as bad as yours, so my response probably doesn't do you much good :/ Some actual advice for you:

Since it's all in your head, try combating it with your head. Find a mantra, something like "I am not afraid of social interaction. Talking with people is good. Making mistakes is okay." or whatever fits your specific scenario. Repeat it often, so often that you can say it without thinking about the words. And begin to believe it. Some food for thought: it is not your perfections that make you who you are, for nobody is perfect. It is your imperfections. Your flaws. That is who you are. Embrace it. Humanity is ugly, and that includes you. And everybody else. I could go on, but you probably get my point.


--------------------
Coaster said: so i got free drug coupons witch u floozies refer to as "money"....


Edited by p_walter (05/23/11 11:42 PM)


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Anonymous #2

Re: Social Anxiety [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #14502071 - 05/23/11 11:37 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

This is gonna sound stupid but just forget about social anxiety, don't try go to other people's standards.  Do you want, if you're not hurting others it doesn't matter.  Only you exist in your world, if people join in than great if not than no worries maybe :shrug:


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OfflineAll We Perceive
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Re: Social Anxiety [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #14502166 - 05/23/11 11:58 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

I understand exactly what you're going through and spent many years of my life in a possibly worse situation.  I would look down at the floor whenever I went anywhere, had generally abysmal self-esteem, and escaped into video games for months on end without seeing a soul.  As time went on, I realized my situation blew dick and I started to climb out of it but it took a lot of work.  At first, I just practiced keeping my head parallel to the ground, and over time, I learned to look people in the eye and communicate like a human being. 

The moral of the story here is that any "change" you make must be gradual and slow or it will be super hard to make the change.  By slowly adapting to what I wanted to become, I was able to feel things out slowly.  I don't know about you, but I'm very sensitive to change (even internal change) so if I jump into anything too quick, I rebel against myself and just revert back to where I was before.  I think there are several issues going on here.  In my opinion, I think it comes down to general low self-esteem.

Solution #1  It sounds like you have a lot of internal shit holding you back.  Corny as it is, but your subconscious colors the world as you see it.  It can be changed.  I recommend seeing a competent therapist / psychologist.  If you are in school, they are cheap as hell or free at the counseling center.  If not, they are admittedly pricey, but they are completely worth it if they are competent (or perhaps more importantly, a wise motha fucka).  By explaining how you perceive the world and the things in it you perceive as obstacles, you will realize how bullshit a lot of your thinking is.  Don't be ashamed by this.  Everyone has crazy thinking to some degree and misperception is, to some degree, unavoidable.  This means you are growing.  I have seen therapists my entire life because I think they are badass.  They are like an acid trip kind of. :assimilate:  You definitely learn a lot about yourself.  As far as meds go, I think they are are cool if you need them.  There's nothing to be ashamed about for taking them. 

Solution #2 --> I think it's wise to pick ONE thing you want to change and work on it until you're satisfied.  Make a PLAN and stick with it--no wishy washy shit.  Read the fuck out of what you're trying to do through books, talking to people about it, thinking about it, etc.  No reason to re-invent the wheel here.  Work on yourself first.  Hit the gym, tone down whatever you feel is in excess.  Remember: you will fuck up along the way.  Just remember, it's not about walking a mile in one step.  Remember that you are on the path to improvement, realize your mistake, and LEARN from it.  I'm not going to lie, improving yourself is extremely taxing and challenging.  If it was easy, wouldn't everyone be badass?  IMPORTANT: It sounds to some degree like you are trying to find a relationship to solve your problems.  Do not get sucked into a relationship right now.  Focus only on yourself. Sounds greedy but it's totally cool. 

As far as your social issues, I would go out when you can but I wouldn't focus too much there at this point in time.  It seems this way to most, but I assure you, the number of friends / hoes you have at any given point in time is not a measure of your self-worth.  Focus on yourself, improve yourself, and you will be becoming better as many stagnate.  This alone should be a good boost to your self-esteem.

Hope this helps.  I have gone through a fuckton to be who I am now and I have plenty of stories but I have already written a small essay on what I found to be most pertinent.


--------------------


"plus they atually think jambands are good or sumthing, so they clearly know absolutely nothing about music, clearly lol" -Bassfreak


Edited by All We Perceive (05/23/11 11:59 PM)


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Anonymous #1

Re: Social Anxiety [Re: All We Perceive]
    #14504873 - 05/24/11 02:40 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

This is out of control, I want so badly to call in sick to work tomorrow. I'm losing it. I feel like I'm ugly and everyone is always staring at me, they all know I'm weak. I think my boss and coworkers think I'm crazy and they talk about it behind my back. When I talk to people I'm afraid to make eye contact... I already quit my job but I'm stuck working there for another month and I don't think I can make it through. I was having panic attacks all day and hiding from everyone, it feels horrible and no matter what I do I can't shake it.

Honestly I'm at the point where I don't want to live anymore. I can't keep doing this. I've said this over and over again in my life but I never have the balls to go through with killing myself, what's stopping me most is the thought of my parents and friends and how I'd fuck up their lives even more by killing myself. The more I think about it I realize how unbalanced life is, all the torment and problems outweigh the few positives... All I'm living for is materials, I'm stuck in this disgusting social scheme of going to work, buying things for myself and paying taxes and human interaction in general and if I choose to live I'll be trapped in this for the rest of my life. I've already humiliated myself in this town since I was in elementary school, I wouldn't be surprised if my stupidity has gone public and it's on the internet or something. Ugh, I don't want to think about it. I wish I could start a new identity.

This change in my mind is very sudden, things were going great for a few months and I had my confidence. Only recently the anxiety came back strong and it's getting worse. I'm having all these painful realizations about myself and the world.

I dropped out of high school because I couldn't go every day; people fucked with me constantly and I had no self esteem. Until 2 years ago I'd been seeing psychologists since I was 7. It never did any good for me in the long run, only temporarily. I tried an SSRI and it made me feel numb, also it goes against everything I believe. Furthermore I couldn't afford a psychologist even if I wanted to go.

I feel so afraid and alone. I need to be at work tomorrow morning and I don't know how I'll be able to pull myself together and go in.  I don't know why I'm posting this... I don't expect anyone to understand or help, I guess it's just an outlet.


Edited by Anonymous (05/27/11 12:15 AM)


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OfflineXUL
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Re: Social Anxiety [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #14507029 - 05/24/11 09:34 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

I understand.

I dont think I have as much as an issue as you do but I get it.

I have a major fear of eye contact which makes my life a living hell. At work we often sit together at a small close quarters table (I work with all women, some are hot!!). I often cant take it and retreat to the next room to read by myself.

I use Klonopin for relief. I try not to take it unless its something important though life job training, an interview, or a date. My doctor said a psychologist could help cure me. Maybe. He thinks something from my past is causing it. Maybe he is right who knows?

I actually have been in your position. In my last semester of college my anxiety was so bad I quit my job, skipped 4 weeks of class, lost 20 pounds, became withdrawn, and barely made it through college.

I dont know how to tell you to cope with it man. The honest truth is that I dont cope with it very well myself. When I trained for my last job and my current job, I pretty much had a 3 day long panick attack. I made it through because I forced myself. I forced myself through 3 days of feeling like I was going to seizure and convulse on the floor because of eye contact and close quarter human interaction. I think you just have to take it like a man. The fact is that it really is going to SUCK ASS. But you still gotta keep trying.

P.S. Anybody who tells us that we need to relax and "just be", like the one guy who posted in this thread... well thats bull shit. We both know that anxiety can not be tammed by such bull shit. Its a ferocious seemingly untangible ailment that can not be healed by two lines of cheap words.


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Anonymous #1

Re: Social Anxiety [Re: XUL]
    #14507465 - 05/24/11 11:02 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Thanks, that actually made me feel a little bit better.
You get it. people don't understand it's not a conscious decision. No matter what I think the anxiety is just there, it's deep rooted inside me. I was talking to someone close earlier and they told me to adapt a positive mindset and be happy with myself, I wish it were that simple. I feel damaged, I seriously thought I was done with this anxiety and for a few months things were going great, now all of sudden its back and evident that it will always come back
I took a long nap and calmed down a lot, still feel like shit but its better than before. Glad I didn't do anything stupid in my desperation... but still, if I get that low again which I undoubtedly will, it's always an option... I'm still horrified of going to work in the morning, I don't want to go to bed.  Fuck


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Offlineseylm
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Re: Social Anxiety [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #14507478 - 05/24/11 11:05 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Two things which have helped me a lot are Mooji and cognitive behavioral therapy (1 2). Those people don't talk as much as you think and they don't know shit about who you really are. If you want to talk feel free to send me a PM. :hug:

EDIT

Oh also L Theanine and Kava Kava are some natural supplements that can reduce anxiety. The kava didn't really work for me but the L Theanine kinda gives a more mellow vibe to things.


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"you may be wearing an Armani suit, but it's just pyjamas" - Mooji


Edited by seylm (05/24/11 11:10 PM)


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Invisiblekake
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Re: Social Anxiety [Re: seylm]
    #14507549 - 05/24/11 11:21 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Sorry to hear your situation.  What you need to know is that it's very common and there is definitely hope.  It sounds like this stuff stems from how you felt in high school.  That is a time where we are figuring out who we are and often times we rely (too much) on others to define ourselves.  It sounds like you had a tough time dealing with the way people treated you back then, and you're responding to your current situation in the same way you might have responded back then -- probably the only way you knew how.  I understand this feeling.  You're right in that it's absolutely not a conscious decision.  In fact, if you analyze the times you feel this way, I bet you'll feel less conscious than ever.  One thing you can do is start to just bring consciousness to it.  This may seem like a small first step but it is perhaps the most important one, to separate the YOU NOW from the YOU THEN.  It's important to understand that you are not that person anymore and that it's only a PART of your true self.  This is something I learned from a friend who is a therapist and has been very helpful to many people with social anxiety.  I hope it can help you. Try to remember that true lasting changes happen gradually, and be compassionate towards yourself during the initial phases.  You are here now asking for help and that is proof that you have the will to change.


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The answer to 1984 is 1776.


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Invisiblekake
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Re: Social Anxiety [Re: kake]
    #14507569 - 05/24/11 11:25 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Also, someone recommended alcohol.  I actually recommend you avoid drugs (including alcohol) if possible.  Often times alcohol will make you less socially anxious while you drink, but the day or two after you will have compounded your social anxiety.  Try sobriety for a week or two, coupled with some exercise and healthy eating (your body will thank you and your self esteem might even improve as a result) if you haven't tried this before, and see what happens.


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The answer to 1984 is 1776.


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Re: Social Anxiety [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #14507605 - 05/24/11 11:32 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Ive struggled with severe social anxiety my whole life. A good bit of it is due to never feeling "good enough" for other people. Ive stopped even trying to bother to seem good enough, whatever that is. It's probably due to self esteem issues, being made to feel like i was a bad person by my folks since I was little. This then continued onto elementary school, middle school and until late highschool after having being bullied. Eventually I started treating people the way I had always been treated and this gave me even less friends.

Alcohol works to an extent but the problem there is there is a fine line between me being sociably buzzed and me being a hammered asshole. It is a line that is in fact so thin I think the difference is 1-2 drinks. Im not even sociable till Im hammered.

Sometimes it get's better...Ill have a day where I forget to think if Im lucky and the anxiety is at bay but if a hot girl tries to flirt with me or im encountered with some kind of confrontation that any normal person could deal with I often lose my cool, stare at the ground, become awkward, etc.

Like someone else said Ill often become sociable on psychs but sometimes there is little control over what is said (mainly with mush as opposed to dose).

Ive been to little to no real romantic relationships depending on what you define as real romantic relationships and they were mostly all in highschool (25 now)

Ive had to quit multiple jobs due to severe panic attacks at work. I often feared my bosses thought I was a weak, timid, untrustworthy homosexual due to my anxiety.

Never chose to be like this. Nothing would make me happier than if it would just disappear oneday.


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Invisiblekake
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Re: Social Anxiety [Re: MisterMuscaria]
    #14507626 - 05/24/11 11:37 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Quote:

MisterMuscaria said:
Ive struggled with severe social anxiety my whole life. A good bit of it is due to never feeling "good enough" for other people.




Indeed.  The super-ego has a vital role in our function as civilized humans, but we are not really taught how to keep it in check.  If you don't defend yourself from your super-ego, you can count on anxiety.


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The answer to 1984 is 1776.


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Anonymous #1

Re: Social Anxiety [Re: kake]
    #14507671 - 05/24/11 11:44 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

That's good advice kake... what you said about being a different person from who I was in the past really resonated with me... it's just hard for me to successfully integrate it, I try to convince myself of these positive concepts but there's always that voice in the back of my mind nagging at me. I've been having freaky nightmares lately too and I wake up feeling like I'm still dreaming, the negative dreams stick with me and its a shitty way to start my day. All day my mind races, I can't get it to shut up... When the anxiety is at its peak I'm shaking all over, sweating and almost hyperventilating, it's the worst feeling.
I truly cannot understand how humans can be so heartless to each other... I'm a real person with real feelings no matter how I act or what I look like! It makes me want to swear off humans all together. I'm sure I look like an emotional train wreck, isn't that enough for people to show some compassion and at the very least not talk shit about me and make it worse?
I think I should trip on mushrooms again soon, I could use the forced insight and afterglow even if it is a rough trip I always end up feeling better afterwards.


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InvisibleMisterMuscaria
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Re: Social Anxiety [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #14507691 - 05/24/11 11:48 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

i find that when I am in that mind state mushrooms can compound it and make it worse due to racing thoughts.

I had successful experiences mixing mushrooms with lion's tail(tea) though, in which all of my anxiety was alleviated for one day(which has only happened few times in my life). I had amazing visuals to boot.

LSD boosts my confidence like no other drug.


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Re: Social Anxiety [Re: kake]
    #14507696 - 05/24/11 11:49 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Quote:

kake said:
Also, someone recommended alcohol.  I actually recommend you avoid drugs (including alcohol) if possible.  Often times alcohol will make you less socially anxious while you drink, but the day or two after you will have compounded your social anxiety.  Try sobriety for a week or two, coupled with some exercise and healthy eating (your body will thank you and your self esteem might even improve as a result) if you haven't tried this before, and see what happens.




I mentioned the alcohol, but to clarify, it was in a joking manner. Do what this guy says.


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Coaster said: so i got free drug coupons witch u floozies refer to as "money"....


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Anonymous #1

Re: Social Anxiety [Re: MisterMuscaria]
    #14507724 - 05/24/11 11:53 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Quote:

MisterMuscaria said:
i find that when I am in that mind state mushrooms can compound it and make it worse due to racing thoughts.

I had successful experiences mixing mushrooms with lion's tail(tea) though, in which all of my anxiety was alleviated for one day(which has only happened few times in my life). I had amazing visuals to boot.

LSD boosts my confidence like no other drug.




I find with mushrooms I don't really have a choice but to listen... it's always been a positive experience for me  even when I go into it feeling depressed... LSD on the other hand doesn't have that mental push and all my negative thoughts manifest themselves in visuals if I'm in a bad mindset


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Invisiblebonnahoo
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Re: Social Anxiety [Re: Anonymous #1] * 1
    #14513871 - 05/26/11 06:25 AM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Man you are NOT alone....

I have been living with this as long as I can remember. I won't go into much detail cause you know what it's like but mine gets so bad that if everyone's focus is on me, especially if I'm giving a speech or presentation, I will and have literally blacked out and dropped to the floor. For me it's not thinking that I'm not good enough or that people will judge me, I feel like I'm usually above everyone else's level anyways and honestly don't consciously give a shit what people think of me, but as soon as I'm placed into said situation I get dizzy and start to lose it... I don't know why this happens since I go into it not giving a shit, IDK if my subconscious is fucking me over or what, but it's impossible to deal with... I am prescribed xanax to take but even that does not help at all...

IDK what to do either, but if you find something that works for you, do share and know that you are not alone :wink:


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Re: Social Anxiety [Re: bonnahoo]
    #14518114 - 05/26/11 10:08 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

I would definitely not smoke weed. Smoking weed everyday, is what atleast somewhat created my social anxiety. I rarely ever smoke weed now and 90% of my social anxiety has gone away completely. Weed just makes me think WAY too much and all the time.


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Anonymous #2

Re: Social Anxiety [Re: Misanthropic]
    #14518891 - 05/27/11 12:41 AM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Quote:

Misanthropic said:
I would definitely not smoke weed. Smoking weed everyday, is what atleast somewhat created my social anxiety. I rarely ever smoke weed now and 90% of my social anxiety has gone away completely. Weed just makes me think WAY too much and all the time.




but it feels so damn good  :sad:


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Invisibledr_gonz
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. [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #14520097 - 05/27/11 10:19 AM (12 years, 8 months ago)

.


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InvisibleMisterMuscaria
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Re: Social Anxiety [Re: dr_gonz]
    #14520183 - 05/27/11 10:45 AM (12 years, 8 months ago)

You dont have social anxiety, you have death anxiety.


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Invisibledr_gonz
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. [Re: MisterMuscaria]
    #14520191 - 05/27/11 10:47 AM (12 years, 8 months ago)

.


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InvisibleTheEnd
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Re: Social Anxiety [Re: dr_gonz]
    #14520932 - 05/27/11 01:39 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

I've got social anxiety pretty bad too.

As much as I like weed, I think it only makes my anxiety worse. I find myself doing nothing all day and then at the end of the day I'm like, "Seriously? the day is already over?! I didn't do a damn thing!"

Weed is great in moderation, but too much of anything is never good.

Why does it have to be so hard to quit...  :bongload:  :shake:


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Invisibledr_gonz
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. [Re: dr_gonz]
    #14520945 - 05/27/11 01:40 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

.


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InvisibleIrishdrunk
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Re: Social Anxiety [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #14529533 - 05/29/11 06:05 AM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
I can't stand crowded places, I suddenly get the urge to leave and go somewhere quiet to be alone. I'm often afraid to leave my house. For several months I thought I was overcoming this anxiety, I got a job and built an active social life, but lately it's been coming back strong. Today was the worst. When going out in public I couldn't stop sweating and it was hard to breathe. Lately I need to will myself to even go out with close friends. I'm afraid of making a permanent impression on every person I meet.

This is purely psychological and I've been searching for a long-term solution with no luck... Weed seems to help but I  haven't smoked for a few weeks... I tried an SSRI for a period of time but it felt numbing and deep down I had a strong moral opposition to it, and also fears about health effects I read of.

For those of you with social anxiety, what do you do to fight it?





I used to have social anxiety, then I quit drinking, smoking pot, and occasional cocaine binges. Then I started doing sports and meeting people.  One by one I gained more friends, and my social anxiety went away.  Also I went back to school, and sitting in class slowly helps you because the teacher pushes you to do group projects in certain classes.  You just have to get out of your comfort zone, keep pushing the limits, and soon enough you'll be very social and happy.

You could start by going to meditation classes, you'll meet other people with social anxiety and it will be small groups.  Then you can get into cognitive therapy groups that combine meditation and talking.  Its a different approach but its more structured and controlled.  Go to your local mental health place and ask if there's any meditation for anxiety classes.


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OfflineKamoopstinoops
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Re: Social Anxiety [Re: Irishdrunk]
    #14534720 - 05/30/11 07:49 AM (12 years, 7 months ago)

If you watch a lot of porn and masturbate a lot, try stopping both for a few months (more importantly porn but both is beneficial for recovery). Will provide newfound invigoration and a powerful urge to just get out there! Too much porn warps your brain and makes you see the world in a different way, it can suck the life outta ya by leaving you physically and mentally drained by rewiring the brain and can turn people into introverted kooks.

Don't knock it til ya try it, will be hard but you'll start noticing the benefits soon enough. Revert back to the way your body was meant to function by not overstimulating yourself with false unrealistic imagery. Our brains weren't designed for that shit.

Not saying this applies to you but putting it out there as heavy porn use is being increasingly linked to social anxiety as well as increasingly prevalent sexual dysfunction in young people which can also contribute to social anxiety.

Of course, drugs don't help particularly weed. Few people seem to handle weed just fine but many just turn into scaredy cats mostly due to weed's nature of causing people to over-analyze situations leading to the ol - "paralysis by analysis".

Just my 2c.


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OfflineHeffy
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Re: Social Anxiety [Re: dr_gonz]
    #14534899 - 05/30/11 09:07 AM (12 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
my point is that OP needs to realize that in the grand scheme of it all none of this really matters. if he can trace that feeling to the root of his anxiety he'd see there is nothing to fret over. I hate going to crowded places too, probably more than OP, but I've learned that anxiety serves no beneficial purpose in my life. breathing, and presence of mind is helpful.

xanax is helpful when used in moderation.




That sounds great but doesn't actually offer any help, and demonstrates to me that your anxiety is probably not all that bad.

People try and make it out like "oh well if you just realize that it doesn't matter it's ok". I'm sorry but that doesn't really work. If I could choose to be less anxious just by "tracing the root of my anxiety" it wouldn't be a problem for me. If you can do this it clearly isn't a real problem for you.

To me it's like saying well if you stick your hand in a fire, and just realize that in the grand scheme of things your hand burning doesn't really matter, you wouldn't feel compelled to pull your hand out of the fire.


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I am the king of Rome, and above grammar! - Emperor Sigismund


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OfflineJackofSpades
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Registered: 03/01/09
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Re: Social Anxiety [Re: Heffy]
    #14605534 - 06/13/11 10:59 AM (12 years, 7 months ago)

Social Anxiety...anxiety in general...something I truly fucking despise beyond the comprehension of words...I've only had one, two, maybe three real panic attacks in my life and holy fucking jesus, fuck that shit. I broke out in hives all over my body and felt like I was being crushed, like in a car cruncher they use at junk yards or something--for about 9 hours, couldn't sleep until 7 in the morning.

My anxiety typically just takes me to the threshold of that place when its at its worse (never crosses thank god, except for those few times) but seriously, its enough to make you go fucking insane. I feel like my own family (not parents/sibling) hate me or look at me like a freak (people who I've heard nothing but love & support from my entire life). Its just what the feelings do, they run your thoughts into madness, which is why mediation is helpful as it teaches you to let go of thought and not be so attached to feelings at the same time. Takes time but its worth the effort.

I think you should try to find a place where you can go to a group meeting for people with mental disorders (bi-polar, anxiety, depression) or if you can find it--social anxiety group sessions. Same thing as with Alcoholics Anonymous. This shit does work, its the reason you came here and are talking to us. To know that other people are going through the same hell makes you feel better and connected when you've felt like shit and totally alienated from others. All of the sudden you find that you aren't different and your condition is actually quite common and you aren't alone in your misery!

Also, if you go to one of these meetings, what is there to be scared of? You know just by being there that everyone is fucked in the EXACT SAME FUCKING WAY as you. Everything you described about yourself I either deal with or have dealt with in the past.

Seeing people in the same condition will teach you to accept yourself and be yourself, which is the entire problem imo. Of course, you can't just "go be yourself and live" like other people suggest as you and I know its never that easy, but it is the essence of what needs to be done...its just not a quick fix...


sidenote: I just realized I'm bringing a 14 day thread back to life but I just wrote all this so fuck it..I was only trying to help lol


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If you're frightened of dying and  you're holding on, you'll see devils tearing your life away. But if you've made your peace, then the devils are really angels, freeing you from the earth.


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