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Shop: Kraken Kratom Red Vein Kratom   Unfolding Nature Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order

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Anonymous #1

Getting rid of an ex.
    #14497376 - 05/23/11 01:58 AM (12 years, 8 months ago)

We met when she was 19 and I 22, I was her first serious relationship, I was her first Lover. I'd loved and lost already at this point in my life. I couldn't reciprocate any firsts with her, which of course bothered her and partially caused our downfall. We had a pretty good relationship for 3 years, she was a bit clingy but not unbearable at first. Once things did become unbearable and our relationship was no longer fun to either of us (we started to fight all the time over anything) we both decided it was time to move on.

Fast forward to now, about 5 years later and over a year and a half after we broke it off. She still calls, texts, emails every day. I haven't even seen her in about 6 months and refuse her any time she asks to meet up. I've made it very clear to her where I stand on us. I've told her straight up we are done and will never work ever again. She's tried to sleep with me since the break up and I denied her. I haven't even touched her or looked at her in any sort of desirable way since we've broken up, in fact she disgusts me for the most part.

I wasn't her entire life, she has tons of friends and family to support her and they were ecstatic when they heard we broke up. Yet she still hasn't found a new guy or even tried at all. She just keeps hoping, no matter how direct I am with her. I've told her many many times we are done, the fucked up part is she will agree a lot of times then a day or two later (longest was a week) she will call/show up some where saying how much she misses me and all this. I don't tell her I miss her or lead her on, I'll just reply "ok, uh huh, yup, gotta go" or remind her how I feel about us (ie there is no us)

I've tried to just cut off all contact and she will cross the stalker levels. Showing up at my house, friends houses, parents house, any where she might think I am, and that shit can really fuck up my game.

How do I get rid of this girl? Keep in mind I did care for her at one point, so I don't want to crush her so bad that she kills herself or anything, she's a really passionate person and her emotions control her a lot.


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InvisibleSleepwalker
Overshoes

Registered: 05/07/08
Posts: 5,503
Re: Getting rid of an ex. [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #14497498 - 05/23/11 03:13 AM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
I wasn't her entire life, she has tons of friends and family to support her and they were ecstatic when they heard we broke up.




What happened to these people? Maybe you could talk to them, and have them help wean her off of you?


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OfflineBipolarbear
Stranger with candy
 User Gallery


Registered: 05/23/10
Posts: 828
Last seen: 10 years, 2 months
Re: Getting rid of an ex. [Re: Sleepwalker]
    #14497887 - 05/23/11 07:05 AM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Read The Gift of Fear.  It's written so people understand better their gut reactions and it tells you how to deal with stalkers.  You already know how as you said it and that is to cut off all communication with them.  Don't answer their phone calls, emails, texts etc.  After enough time of you not enabling her by taking the time to give her attention she will see how futile it is and give up.  Unless she is completely psycho in which case you file a restraining order.  Good luck!


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