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Invisiblehelix
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Registered: 09/13/10
Posts: 409
it's official...mdma doesn't do anything for me anymore
    #14489481 - 05/21/11 12:46 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

So I used to roll quite a bit up until a year/year and a half ago. I stopped doing mdma because i was feeling the low serotonin levels and it was starting to feel artificial, plus I was trying psychedelics on for size and finding a much more complex intellectual-euphoric world with them, as opposed to the much simpler empathy release of MDMA.

But last night I decided to give it another go. I just finished my semester, it was the rapture, and this was some of the purest MDMA I had ever come across (they were CRYSTALS).

Early-on, I realized that the feeling I got is a feeling that I've already learned to channel in my sober life...getting to know someone, accomplishing something, self-improvement, hundreds of things I can think of, that, over the course of the past year, I've conditioned to trigger this exact same intense euphoria as what I was experiencing last night on mdma - where everyone is awesome, I feel no reserves talking to anyone about anything and where I feel truly comfortable in my own skin. Even the body high i can (almost) replicate through working out, intense yoga or meditation.

But I hadn't really worked for that feeling too much at this party. It was automatic. So it felt super cheap. And now I feel kinda burnt out as is typical for a lot of people in the morning after...so my conclusion is that I'm finally over MDMA. It's taught me MUCH about myself, and perhaps seriously overdoing it a year ago hasn't helped my conception of it, but I'm pretty certain that it has nothing more to teach me

RIP MDMA Love Affair 2008 - 2011  :crymeariver:


Edited by helix (05/21/11 12:48 PM)


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InvisibleThe Phleg
Big Dick Chakra
I'm a teapot User Gallery


Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 03/07/10
Posts: 14,473
Loc: Uncanny Valley
Re: it's official...mdma doesn't do anything for me anymore [Re: helix]
    #14489489 - 05/21/11 12:50 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Live and learn.


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Offlineeyesofachild
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Registered: 05/21/11
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Re: it's official...mdma doesn't do anything for me anymore [Re: The Phleg]
    #14489766 - 05/21/11 02:12 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

It sounds wonderful though that you've learned how to incorporate things initially learned from MDMA into your sober life, and impressive you can even reach the body high somewhat through exercise/yoga. It seems you have used it as a very good tool in your life, and no longer need or want it anymore.


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Offlinetraviedigital
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Registered: 05/03/08
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Re: it's official...mdma doesn't do anything for me anymore [Re: eyesofachild]
    #14491580 - 05/21/11 09:44 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

you've crossed over :wink:


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Invisiblehelix
Idealist Thinker Musician Lover
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Registered: 09/13/10
Posts: 409
Re: it's official...mdma doesn't do anything for me anymore [Re: eyesofachild]
    #14491625 - 05/21/11 09:52 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Quote:

eyesofachild said:
learned how to incorporate things initially learned from MDMA into your sober life




Actually i should've clarified. After my major mdma love affair back in the day, It was :lsdabc: that helped me figure out how to channel positive mdma-like energy while sober :raveface:


Edited by helix (05/21/11 09:54 PM)


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Invisibleohcrapitsnico
The Other One
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Registered: 06/06/09
Posts: 2,720
Loc: Houston
Re: it's official...mdma doesn't do anything for me anymore [Re: traviedigital]
    #14491629 - 05/21/11 09:53 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

I've been at it for more than two years now...I never went overboard but I've probably rolled a good 30 maybe 40 times, I've lost count. But I'm definitely at that point where psychs are starting to eclipse x for me. I still want good rolls though. :frown:

...even better I want to candyflip. :laugh:


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Offlineoccollegeboi
MushroomSpaceGod
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Registered: 04/10/11
Posts: 2,857
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Re: it's official...mdma doesn't do anything for me anymore [Re: helix]
    #14491685 - 05/21/11 10:06 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Ecstasy is REALLY bad for you, anyway. LSD does thousands of times less brain damage than E. E makes neurotoxins.


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Invisiblemuistrue
Inspired by the mystery
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Registered: 03/20/05
Posts: 12,899
Loc: Behind the Redwoods
Re: it's official...mdma doesn't do anything for me anymore [Re: helix]
    #14491721 - 05/21/11 10:15 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

It definitely isn't as fun or magical as it was when I first started doing it but I still do use it, it's just party fuel for me now.


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