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Offlineg00ru
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relationships are based inherently in insecurity * 5
    #14457217 - 05/15/11 04:08 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

In a more awesome world, we'd all be so cool that we'd never have to say "we're in a relationship," it would just work out that way and you'd be with one other person a bunch and have sex with them but you'd both be chill enough never to slap a label on it.  What good does the label do? It's just to compensate for insecurity...if two people really are self sufficient in their own lives, then who needs a "relationship" anyways...let things happen according to your natural feelings.  I feel like doin shit this way has the potential to create romance that is much more rewarding, because events will work out in a more effortless way without people trying too hard to make the situation what they think it should be.

thoughts?


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drowse in prison and your waking will be but loss

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Offlinelearningtofly
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Re: relationships are based inherently in insecurity [Re: g00ru]
    #14457232 - 05/15/11 04:10 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

I like saying im in a relationship because its a happy fact. Just like when i tell people i have a phat wad of cash in my pocket for my friend who has some sass for me. Its just a happy fact we like to iterate orally its not that we like showing off or feeling insecure about it, we just like expressing our present status.


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InvisibleTYL3R
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Registered: 11/19/04
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Re: relationships are based inherently in insecurity [Re: g00ru] * 2
    #14457234 - 05/15/11 04:10 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

That gives me thoughts.

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Invisiblerackem
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Re: relationships are based inherently in insecurity [Re: g00ru]
    #14457238 - 05/15/11 04:11 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

i like the labeless romances.

they can also be a burden of truth. because sometimes labels are hard to undo.

good theory.. i like it


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InvisibleAlmostAsCoolAs
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Re: relationships are based inherently in insecurity [Re: g00ru]
    #14457240 - 05/15/11 04:11 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Or maybe two people just want to make it known that they are with the person they love?

That being said, I have a girl but I'm not in a relationship.:highfive:


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OfflineAnthony917
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Re: relationships are based inherently in insecurity [Re: g00ru]
    #14457242 - 05/15/11 04:11 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

I think people put labels on their relationships because NOT having a label leaves it open to....anything really.

When you say "this is my girlfriend" it's almost like a sense of ownership, where she is exclusive to you...which is what a relationship is about.
If you don't want to call someone you love & sleep with your girlfriend/wife/whatever....then I'd just say you're fuck buddies...


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Offlinetherapist
sheeeeeeeeeeeit...
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Re: relationships are based inherently in insecurity [Re: Anthony917] * 2
    #14457276 - 05/15/11 04:15 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

there are labels for relationships because all relationships ARE one of those things.  you're either bf/gf, fuck buddies, married, engaged, friends, family, acquaintances, or etc.  words describe ideas and states of being.  they're not arbitrary, most of the time.

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OfflineShiVersblood
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Re: relationships are based inherently in insecurity [Re: Anthony917]
    #14457280 - 05/15/11 04:16 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

If you dont put a label on it then people are going to assume she is single and hella try to sleep with her constantly.

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Offlineg00ru
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Re: relationships are based inherently in insecurity [Re: Anthony917]
    #14457283 - 05/15/11 04:16 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

yeah exactly...that's MY girlfriend OMG :scream:

if you want other people to know i guess say its a relationship but people will find out anyways and it would be more chill in my hypothetical way of doin thangs

Basically, what it comes down to is I always thought more communication was a good thing for relationships...but in many cases, the less that's said, the better.


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Invisiblegerryjarcia
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Re: relationships are based inherently in insecurity [Re: g00ru]
    #14457321 - 05/15/11 04:24 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

guruu said:
In a more awesome world, we'd all be so cool that we'd never have to say "we're in a relationship," it would just work out that way and you'd be with one other person a bunch and have sex with them but you'd both be chill enough never to slap a label on it.  What good does the label do? It's just to compensate for insecurity...if two people really are self sufficient in their own lives, then who needs a "relationship" anyways...let things happen according to your natural feelings.  I feel like doin shit this way has the potential to create romance that is much more rewarding, because events will work out in a more effortless way without people trying too hard to make the situation what they think it should be.

thoughts?




i agree. but the reality is people are insecure and need the labels to get by in life :shrug:


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"We are all intoxicated. We were born into an insane asylum, a world crazy-making. We believe what we see and hear. The real myth is the myth of sanity, of rationality: it's a disease that is eating away at the earth. All the poisons flow from our denial. We deny madness, we forget our crimes, we dismember the corpse, we imprison our children. We need poison to poison the poison, to remember the sacred nature of intoxication, the green body of the young god." ~ Dale Pendell

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Offlinesirdonut
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Re: relationships are based inherently in insecurity [Re: gerryjarcia]
    #14457448 - 05/15/11 04:49 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

yes, I feel pretty much the exact same way.  You can't own another being and trying to is ugly and based in insecurity as you've said.  Most relationships are void of any real love anyways.  Two loving beings would be capable of being together without label as love always allows the other freedom.


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"It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society." - Jiddu Krishnamurti

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Offlineg00ru
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Re: relationships are based inherently in insecurity [Re: gerryjarcia]
    #14458648 - 05/15/11 07:58 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

gerryjarcia said:
Quote:

guruu said:
In a more awesome world, we'd all be so cool that we'd never have to say "we're in a relationship," it would just work out that way and you'd be with one other person a bunch and have sex with them but you'd both be chill enough never to slap a label on it.  What good does the label do? It's just to compensate for insecurity...if two people really are self sufficient in their own lives, then who needs a "relationship" anyways...let things happen according to your natural feelings.  I feel like doin shit this way has the potential to create romance that is much more rewarding, because events will work out in a more effortless way without people trying too hard to make the situation what they think it should be.

thoughts?




i agree. but the reality is people are insecure and need the labels to get by in life :shrug:




true, true, but it's always worth it to purge yourself of insecurity, and romance can be a good opportunity for that if you're detached enough


--------------------
check out my music!
drowse in prison and your waking will be but loss

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Offlinerodfarva
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Re: relationships are based inherently in insecurity [Re: g00ru]
    #14459153 - 05/15/11 09:15 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Yea.. i had this for about 5 years. It was fun. She finally used the excuse that she didnt think we were "official" when i called her out on being with other guys. Theres a lot more to it, but after five years she begs the question, and my answer was a definitive "no we are not."


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Offlinegonzo422
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Re: relationships are based inherently in insecurity [Re: sirdonut]
    #14459374 - 05/15/11 09:55 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

sirdonut said:
yes, I feel pretty much the exact same way.  You can't own another being and trying to is ugly and based in insecurity as you've said.  Most relationships are void of any real love anyways.  Two loving beings would be capable of being together without label as love always allows the other freedom.




I totally agree - well stated.........


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When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro

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InvisibleaNeway2sayHooray
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Re: relationships are based inherently in insecurity [Re: gerryjarcia]
    #14459511 - 05/15/11 10:20 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

gerryjarcia said:
Quote:

guruu said:
In a more awesome world, we'd all be so cool that we'd never have to say "we're in a relationship," it would just work out that way and you'd be with one other person a bunch and have sex with them but you'd both be chill enough never to slap a label on it.  What good does the label do? It's just to compensate for insecurity...if two people really are self sufficient in their own lives, then who needs a "relationship" anyways...let things happen according to your natural feelings.  I feel like doin shit this way has the potential to create romance that is much more rewarding, because events will work out in a more effortless way without people trying too hard to make the situation what they think it should be.

thoughts?




i agree. but the reality is people are insecure and need the labels to get by in life




--------------------
Mad_Larkin said:  Death is just a thang.
:clementine:
MrJellineck said:  Profits, prophets. That's all you jews think about.
sheekle said: life is drugs... and music... and cat... :snowman:

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Invisiblehelix
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Re: relationships are based inherently in insecurity [Re: Anthony917]
    #14460091 - 05/16/11 12:25 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

Anthony917 said:
When you say "this is my girlfriend" it's almost like a sense of ownership, where she is exclusive to you...which is what a relationship is about.





I think this illustrates exactly why i agree so much with OP^ Relationships necessarily, as a part of the label itself, are about OWNERSHIP of another person. You can communicate that you want to be monogomous with the person in question without slapping that label on it. But someone could just as easily question monogomy which is another debate...

In any case, where someone is insecure i think it's more important to face those feelings head-on and deconstruct them, rather than depend on the definition of your relationship to someone to keep those feelings at bay

Edited by helix (05/16/11 12:26 AM)

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Offlineakira_akuma
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Re: relationships are based inherently in insecurity [Re: g00ru]
    #14460101 - 05/16/11 12:27 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

we base our actions from the promotion and fear of insecurity.

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OfflineMuufokfok
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Re: relationships are based inherently in insecurity [Re: helix]
    #14460390 - 05/16/11 01:57 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

aronf13 said:
Quote:

Anthony917 said:
When you say "this is my girlfriend" it's almost like a sense of ownership, where she is exclusive to you...which is what a relationship is about.





I think this illustrates exactly why i agree so much with OP^ Relationships necessarily, as a part of the label itself, are about OWNERSHIP of another person. You can communicate that you want to be monogomous with the person in question without slapping that label on it. But someone could just as easily question monogomy which is another debate...

In any case, where someone is insecure i think it's more important to face those feelings head-on and deconstruct them, rather than depend on the definition of your relationship to someone to keep those feelings at bay



i really like this, i might have to take it to show someone i know


--------------------
"I'm guessing the 'ancient lost drug' of india is psychedelic mushrooms. The correlation between sacred cows (in hinduism) and magic mushrooms growing on cow dung is too strong to ignore, if you ask me."

As the ocean waves, the universe "peoples"
~Alan Watts~

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InvisibleCarl Sagan
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Re: relationships are based inherently in insecurity [Re: g00ru] * 1
    #14460506 - 05/16/11 02:39 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

guruu said:
In a more awesome world, we'd all be so cool that we'd never have to say "we're in a relationship," it would just work out that way and you'd be with one other person a bunch and have sex with them but you'd both be chill enough never to slap a label on it.  What good does the label do? It's just to compensate for insecurity...if two people really are self sufficient in their own lives, then who needs a "relationship" anyways...let things happen according to your natural feelings.  I feel like doin shit this way has the potential to create romance that is much more rewarding, because events will work out in a more effortless way without people trying too hard to make the situation what they think it should be.

thoughts?





Quote:

What good does the label do? It's just to compensate for insecurity..




Climb down off the horse broheem.  Your just as insecure as everyone else and that statement proves it. Figure it out...


--------------------
“Sacred cows make the best hamburger”

Mark Twain



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Invisiblepwnasaurus
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Re: relationships are based inherently in insecurity [Re: Carl Sagan]
    #14460999 - 05/16/11 07:52 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

I love my girlfriend, and I'm not insecure as far as I can tell :shrug:

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