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Invisiblehelix
Idealist Thinker Musician Lover
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Registered: 09/13/10
Posts: 409
being nice to people who suck, is there any objective grounds for judgment?
    #14438488 - 05/12/11 02:52 AM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Does anyone else have difficulty with this? I really want to be able to accept people as they are without judging, or more importantly, letting opinions flow but not let those judgments stop me from treating people equally but right now my roommate is letting a friend stay over who's just really rubs me the wrong way. She's 19 and pregnant, reads nothing but romance novels, eats mcdonalds every day and curses constantly, sometimes literally after every sentence. Her tone of voice is constantly critical or unhappy. Her and my roommate who invited her over regularly have these little arguments over stupid, insignificant things and when my roommate is out, she gets bitter

These are the people who i have difficulty being nice to:


Aren't there any objective grounds for judgment? For example, in my mind, i feel pretty justified in this judgment because she's hurting her kid's health by eating such unhealthy food every day, as well as supporting an unethical company like mcondalds who mistreats their employees and rapes the environment with their pollution. This isn't consistent with my recent desire to attain a "non-judging" attitude to all other people, but these arguments are hard to deny for me


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InvisibledeCypher
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Registered: 02/10/08
Posts: 56,232
Re: being nice to people who suck, is there any objective grounds for judgment? [Re: helix]
    #14438490 - 05/12/11 02:53 AM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Why bother being nice to certain people if doing so makes you discontent?  Nothing wrong with being judgmental if you're happier as a result of it.


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We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.


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InvisibleFerdinando
Male

Registered: 11/15/09
Posts: 3,664
Re: being nice to people who suck, is there any objective grounds for judgment? [Re: deCypher]
    #14440361 - 05/12/11 02:03 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

working for the weekend you know bla bla bla
listen
their mistakes are made by a system that is basically the same as yours
the content is what can have value
to increase the value try to let go once you get hung up on faults of others
keep letting go
and once again
and again and again
just look into this girl's eyes and if you are really non-judgemental you will not feel bad about her situation or blame her but simply see it
once you get a glimpse of this you can start posting posts like this on the shroomery and
keep working on yourself like this
it is not easy but it is worth it
so.. worth what?
the work
the work is the reward
and it carries on


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with our love with our love we could save the world


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InvisibleOrgoneConclusion
Blue Fish Group
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Registered: 04/01/07
Posts: 45,414
Loc: Under the C
Re: being nice to people who suck, is there any objective grounds for judgment? [Re: helix]
    #14440768 - 05/12/11 03:57 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Quote:

She's 19 and pregnant, reads nothing but romance novels, eats mcdonalds every day and curses constantly, sometimes literally after every sentence.




So, if she was 21, ate at Burger King, read murder mysteries and only occasionally cursed...


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InvisibleOrgoneConclusion
Blue Fish Group
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Registered: 04/01/07
Posts: 45,414
Loc: Under the C
Re: being nice to people who suck, is there any objective grounds for judgment? [Re: deCypher]
    #14440772 - 05/12/11 03:59 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Quote:

deCypher said:
Why bother being nice to certain people if doing so makes you discontent?  Nothing wrong with being judgmental if you're happier as a result of it.




Exactly. I think DC is a total _ _ _ _ _ -bag and I am OK with that.


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Invisibledustinthewind13
Fool
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Registered: 11/05/10
Posts: 5,219
Loc: Being a burden
Re: being nice to people who suck, is there any objective grounds for judgment? [Re: OrgoneConclusion]
    #14441260 - 05/12/11 05:48 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

These are the people who i have difficulty being nice to

So... are you asking if its OK for you to judge judgmental people, because they are judging and people who judge piss you off? If that's the case, then go for it. Start judging them or their judging ability. That should piss them off and make you happy.

as well as supporting an unethical company like mcondalds who mistreats their employees and rapes the environment with their pollution

You never ate mcdonalds before :eek:?


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"It is the peculiar quality of a fool to perceive the faults of others and forget his own." - Marcus Tullius Cicero

"A room without books is like a body without a soul."  - Marcus Tullius Cicero

"Do not bite at the bait of pleasure, till you know there is no hook beneath it." -Thomas Jefferson


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InvisibleMoonshoe
Blue Mantis
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Registered: 05/28/04
Posts: 27,202
Loc: Iceland
Re: being nice to people who suck, is there any objective grounds for judgment? [Re: helix]
    #14441446 - 05/12/11 06:32 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Its ok to be honest with yourself. If someone "rubs you the wrong way" just accept that awareness and let it pass over you and through you. Just try not to obsess over it, and maybe try to avoid the person so as not to aggravate yourself.


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Everything I post is fiction.


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