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MisterMuscaria
Registered: 05/13/08
Posts: 27,646
Loc:
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cant trip without dissociating
#14392986 - 05/03/11 05:33 AM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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Well...I had an interesting experience on 2c-b the other weekend in which I played several characters, and each of the characters would speak through me...I would take on the conscience, psyche, way of speaking and i was in the set of the play.
Fast forward to this past weekend when I ate mushrooms, something i hadnt done in over a year and the SAME DAMN THING happened. It was not a heroic dose of mushrooms, not even a normal dose but probably about 2.5 grams. Ive been able to eat several times that in the past without dissociating to that degree.
I became completely dissociated and unable to control my actions, speech, etc. I became different consciousnesses that flowed through me. I would become these characters and play out the plot of the play. I had no ego of my own and picked up whatever ego would be instilled in me in the moment.
Recently i feel like I dont have the identity I used to...I feel like I have no identity anymore other than characters and i become dissociated in everyday life but I can still hold on to tiny shreds of the massive ego i had once...but its difficult...its difficult for me to play me without slipping into other characters and alternate personalities.
I feel distant in day to day life and unable to converse normally or even remember things that happened a couple of minutes ago...my memory seems to constantly reset and I forget where I am or what Im doing unless I see it written down or I am reminded.
I fear that Im losing it.
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ArtieFartie
Mind Manipulator
Registered: 08/05/09
Posts: 2,519
Loc: A Psychedelic Realm
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Hold on brother. Just quit tripping for a while. Even smoking if you have to.
If it doesn't help, see a psychiatrist.
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LongStrangeTrip
Deadhead
Registered: 09/19/09
Posts: 5,382
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Re: cant trip without dissociating [Re: ArtieFartie]
#14393060 - 05/03/11 06:21 AM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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yea..... You may want to seek some real, professional help; someone you can easily relate these experiences to, in an open and comfortable environment. Your wise coming to us, but we are not pro's and what your describing..... idk man sounds serious to me. I have never felt like that on any psychedelics and I have done them for a long time with quite a bit of frequency, relatively speaking.
-------------------- Nothing I say or do is factual; every single thing I write is a work of fiction. Got no idea what I'm talking about here~ "Once in awhile, you get shown the light, in the strangest of places if you look at it right"~ (Grateful Dead) "o puer, qui omnia nomini debes"; "You, boy, who owe's everything to a name"~ Mark Anthony "Nihil est incertius vulgo, nihil obscurius voluntate hominum, nihil fallacius ratione tota comitiorum."; "Nothing is more unpredictable than the mob, nothing more obscure than public opinion, nothing more deceptive than the whole political system."~ Cicero
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redgreenvines
irregular verb
Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 38,061
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I am not sure anyone is the pro in this, except maybe the dalai lama or some sufi master. for more than a millennium the catholics have applied exorcism which is just plain ignorant; I agree, tapering off your tripping and use of any mj will help.
those who know me already get my stream of consciousness and frame stacking theories.
slower brain signal fading induced by entheogens or emotions causes stacking of moments of brain activity in the stream of consciousness, i.e. the previous moments begin to co-exist with the current ones etc. time and space tend to dissolve or follow weakened rules of procession.
it enriches sensation, memory and thoughts
when the stacking is sufficient you can see tracers and trails and when it is more than that you can have personality masks and gestures calving off of the main time line.
(this is your particular issue)
when unfaded personality masks float side by side in the stream, and each of these prolonged fading selves is as fully reactive a self as any other, it gets very confusing as to whose body this is anyway.
no wonder it has been treated as possession.
but it's normal.
observe it and not be disturbed by it. some dissociation from it is sensible, I recommend regular physical exercise, good diet, and a bit of abstention, until it passes into an acceptable range, and a more baseline consistency in your stream of consciousness is established.
If the experts treat you, it wont be that good - expect antipsychotics and probably god. yucky stuff.
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LongStrangeTrip
Deadhead
Registered: 09/19/09
Posts: 5,382
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Re: cant trip without dissociating [Re: redgreenvines]
#14393135 - 05/03/11 06:59 AM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
redgreenvines said: I am not sure anyone is the pro in this, except maybe the dalai lama or some sufi master. for more than a millennium the catholics have applied exorcism which is just plain ignorant; I agree, tapering off your tripping and use of any mj will help.
those who know me already get my stream of consciousness and frame stacking theories.
slower brain signal fading induced by entheogens or emotions causes stacking of moments of brain activity in the stream of consciousness, i.e. the previous moments begin to co-exist with the current ones etc. time and space tend to dissolve or follow weakened rules of procession.
it enriches sensation, memory and thoughts
when the stacking is sufficient you can see tracers and trails and when it is more than that you can have personality masks and gestures calving off of the main time line.
(this is your particular issue)
when unfaded personality masks float side by side in the stream, and each of these prolonged fading selves is as fully reactive a self as any other, it gets very confusing as to whose body this is anyway.
no wonder it has been treated as possession.
but it's normal.
observe it and not be disturbed by it. some dissociation from it is sensible, I recommend regular physical exercise, good diet, and a bit of abstention, until it passes into an acceptable range, and a more baseline consistency in your stream of consciousness is established.
If the experts treat you, it wont be that good - expect antipsychotics and probably god. yucky stuff.
Ha he has got a good point....GLuck OP
-------------------- Nothing I say or do is factual; every single thing I write is a work of fiction. Got no idea what I'm talking about here~ "Once in awhile, you get shown the light, in the strangest of places if you look at it right"~ (Grateful Dead) "o puer, qui omnia nomini debes"; "You, boy, who owe's everything to a name"~ Mark Anthony "Nihil est incertius vulgo, nihil obscurius voluntate hominum, nihil fallacius ratione tota comitiorum."; "Nothing is more unpredictable than the mob, nothing more obscure than public opinion, nothing more deceptive than the whole political system."~ Cicero
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noobieman
Stranger
Registered: 05/03/10
Posts: 74
Last seen: 12 years, 8 months
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At some point this may come down to:
"Hey, Doc. It hurts when I do this!" "Then don't do that."
There is enough diversity across brain chemistries and structures to embrace caution. We can only generalize so much, and then the individual must decide if it's worth whatever they feel is at risk. It's easy for me to tell someone else what risks to take, but I won't be losing the sanity if I'm wrong.
There's also a difference between doing something once a year and doing it every week.
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MisterMuscaria
Registered: 05/13/08
Posts: 27,646
Loc:
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Re: cant trip without dissociating [Re: noobieman]
#14394160 - 05/03/11 12:12 PM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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This actually only started happening after long periods of abstinence from tripping and then tripping again.
Kinda like how starting smoking weed again gives you anxiety.
Here is a brief rundown of my tripping history;
From 15-17 I tripped a few times a year. From 18-20 I tripped probably monthly. From 21-24.5 I tripped every week, sometimes twice a week I quit tripping all together about 9 months ago. Ive since tripped a handful of times, after a 6 month period of abstinence Ive probably tripped 3 times, back to the monthly plan. (acid once, 2c-b once, mushrooms once)
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redgreenvines
irregular verb
Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 38,061
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so how many selves to you separate into for how long and on what dosage?
By the way, separating into multiple selves is very normal it is like a degree of movement in itself, a bit like riding a bike with no hands, once you get going.
not everyone rides bikes with no hands, and not everyone trips with multiple selves coming face to face, but having the balance to do it and the momentum are part of tripping, and it takes some skill, and a sense of timing.
It can get to the point of "oh my god, I am so stoned, I wonder if I am multiple now..." and boom you are doing it again! just like "I wonder if I can do this trick with no hands" and boom you are driving no hands...
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Mr. Anderson
πριν από το χρόνο κάποιου
Registered: 09/05/10
Posts: 2,677
Loc: Torn between the roots of...
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Re: cant trip without dissociating [Re: redgreenvines]
#14394965 - 05/03/11 03:25 PM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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That's what you get for being a sociopath like me and eating mushrooms
Just kidding. Sounds like a completely normal trip to me. Never have one like that myself but hey your tripping balls man
-------------------- Disclaimer: All posts are completely fictional and or for educational purposes only.
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MisterMuscaria
Registered: 05/13/08
Posts: 27,646
Loc:
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Re: cant trip without dissociating [Re: redgreenvines]
#14395757 - 05/03/11 06:13 PM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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I dont even really think about it as Im doing it. I am more or less compelled by the spirit.
When I become the other person I AM that person and feel as though Ive always been. It feels like overlap on the web of life...I get cross chatter from other aspects of my same self cept they go into this body instead of their usual bodies.
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OneU
Registered: 03/19/11
Posts: 763
Last seen: 12 years, 1 month
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Write down the times you have given your power to others on a piece of paper. People you have slept with, times you've felt inferior or superior (power given to the ego). Sometimes characters we feed our power become strong enough (because we become weak enough) to channel their energy through us. It is like having an entity within. Energies run through us without our conscious self noticing. If it becomes too much the subconscious will secure your chi until you are ready to consciously take it back. Like a lock that only the silent truth will unlock and that is what will open the gates to peace brother. I would start to write a bit, whether on a laptop or paper (paper is better I think) and ask yourself some questions:
What do I want in this lifetime? Why am I here? What do I wish to accomplish? Do I want to create/destroy/ruin/embrace/strengthen/etc.? Why?
Who do I think I am? Where does my ego play a role here?
AM I AWARE AND WHAT AM I AWARE OF?
This should help
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bholzer
quasi-scientist
Registered: 03/22/11
Posts: 2,409
Last seen: 11 years, 9 months
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Re: cant trip without dissociating [Re: OneU]
#14395905 - 05/03/11 06:33 PM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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I understand kind of how your feeling. Not too long ago, I had a pretty rough trip, and since then, things have been a little off.
I have found that it helps to distract myself by staying busy, but then again I'm probably avoiding the problem
Good luck, I hope everything works out. Let us know!
-------------------- Use these substances wisely, they have the ability to cause life altering realizations.
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joemolloy
DMT is Bullshit
Registered: 04/12/09
Posts: 6,525
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Re: cant trip without dissociating [Re: bholzer]
#14396004 - 05/03/11 06:44 PM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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Psychedelic drugs destroy some people's minds. No one understands the complex interactions between these chemicals and your brain. But I think it is instructive to realize these drugs bring about psychotic, delusional, and schizophrenic type states, right? We call it tripping, but in the 1950s doctors believed they induced textbook schizophrenia. Some minds have more difficulty bouncing back to normal than others due to genetics, environment, past use, etc. I think if you value your sanity, you'd not tinker any further with that delicate organ in your head.
Think of each trip as brain trauma. How many much more can it take? Imagine your description in the original post becomes your new normal. Yikes.
-------------------- Don't PM me with bullshit. I don't sell or trade cactus and I don't know where you can get any, other than your mother's ass.
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Psicodelico
Just another psycho
Registered: 01/21/11
Posts: 246
Loc: Brazil
Last seen: 6 years, 1 month
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Re: cant trip without dissociating [Re: joemolloy]
#14396329 - 05/03/11 07:38 PM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
joemolloy said: Psychedelic drugs destroy some people's minds. No one understands the complex interactions between these chemicals and your brain. But I think it is instructive to realize these drugs bring about psychotic, delusional, and schizophrenic type states, right? We call it tripping, but in the 1950s doctors believed they induced textbook schizophrenia. Some minds have more difficulty bouncing back to normal than others due to genetics, environment, past use, etc. I think if you value your sanity, you'd not tinker any further with that delicate organ in your head.
Think of each trip as brain trauma. How many much more can it take? Imagine your description in the original post becomes your new normal. Yikes.
Do you have any scientific proof for all these statements? Any drug has an impact in the brain, it doesn't necessarily mean that it destroys the brain but it does affect it. And NO! it is not all psychedelic drugs that have psychotic, delusional, and schizophrenic effects on the human mind. Why you taking in account 1950's medical 'studies' anyways? I dnt think you should think as each trip as a trauma but an experience, learning and absorbing whatever the trip teaches you. lady or whoever you are, I dnt even know why you are in this forum if all you say is nonsense without any scientific reason, only cheap morality.
For the author of the topic I'd suggest Terence McKenna's book 'True Hallucinations' where he goes on days and days tripping in the amazon with his brother and a couple friends exploring all realms of psychedelic drugs. really awesome stuff!
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joemolloy
DMT is Bullshit
Registered: 04/12/09
Posts: 6,525
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Re: cant trip without dissociating [Re: Psicodelico]
#14396388 - 05/03/11 07:47 PM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Psicodelico said:
Quote:
joemolloy said: Psychedelic drugs destroy some people's minds. No one understands the complex interactions between these chemicals and your brain. But I think it is instructive to realize these drugs bring about psychotic, delusional, and schizophrenic type states, right? We call it tripping, but in the 1950s doctors believed they induced textbook schizophrenia. Some minds have more difficulty bouncing back to normal than others due to genetics, environment, past use, etc. I think if you value your sanity, you'd not tinker any further with that delicate organ in your head.
Think of each trip as brain trauma. How many much more can it take? Imagine your description in the original post becomes your new normal. Yikes.
Do you have any scientific proof for all these statements? Any drug has an impact in the brain, it doesn't necessarily mean that it destroys the brain but it does affect it. And NO! it is not all psychedelic drugs that have psychotic, delusional, and schizophrenic effects on the human mind. Why you taking in account 1950's medical 'studies' anyways? I dnt think you should think as each trip as a trauma but an experience, learning and absorbing whatever the trip teaches you. lady or whoever you are, I dnt even know why you are in this forum if all you say is nonsense without any scientific reason, only cheap morality.
For the author of the topic I'd suggest Terence McKenna's book 'True Hallucinations' where he goes on days and days tripping in the amazon with his brother and a couple friends exploring all realms of psychedelic drugs. really awesome stuff!
Great advice. Ignore the psychotic, delusional, and schizoid psychological effects of these drugs, minimize the significance of tripping for days because the crackpot Mckenna brothers did it, and explore the psychedelic realms of your mind even if you are on the brink of a mental breakdown.
Should he practice juggling with knives and guns too while he's at it?
-------------------- Don't PM me with bullshit. I don't sell or trade cactus and I don't know where you can get any, other than your mother's ass.
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bholzer
quasi-scientist
Registered: 03/22/11
Posts: 2,409
Last seen: 11 years, 9 months
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Re: cant trip without dissociating [Re: Psicodelico]
#14396570 - 05/03/11 08:15 PM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Psicodelico said: Do you have any scientific proof for all these statements? Any drug has an impact in the brain, it doesn't necessarily mean that it destroys the brain but it does affect it. And NO! it is not all psychedelic drugs that have psychotic, delusional, and schizophrenic effects on the human mind. Why you taking in account 1950's medical 'studies' anyways? I dnt think you should think as each trip as a trauma but an experience, learning and absorbing whatever the trip teaches you. lady or whoever you are, I dnt even know why you are in this forum if all you say is nonsense without any scientific reason, only cheap morality.
For the author of the topic I'd suggest Terence McKenna's book 'True Hallucinations' where he goes on days and days tripping in the amazon with his brother and a couple friends exploring all realms of psychedelic drugs. really awesome stuff!
Why does he need to prove anything he said?
If you've done acid, or mushrooms, or dmt, then the chances are that you've had some delusional or psychotic thoughts. It happens, it's just the way the psychedelic drugs make you think. For some people it can be awesome, for some it can be a bad thing. For some it is both.
Some people can treat these trips as a learning experience, and for some the drugs bring about demons they don't want to deal with. That is the trauma Joe talks about. Sometimes, psychedelics can leave you feeling fragmented, and some people just can't pick up the pieces.
-------------------- Use these substances wisely, they have the ability to cause life altering realizations.
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eckhem
Registered: 02/02/10
Posts: 677
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Quote:
MisterMuscaria said: Well...I had an interesting experience on 2c-b the other weekend in which I played several characters, and each of the characters would speak through me...I would take on the conscience, psyche, way of speaking and i was in the set of the play.
Fast forward to this past weekend when I ate mushrooms, something i hadnt done in over a year and the SAME DAMN THING happened. It was not a heroic dose of mushrooms, not even a normal dose but probably about 2.5 grams. Ive been able to eat several times that in the past without dissociating to that degree.
I became completely dissociated and unable to control my actions, speech, etc. I became different consciousnesses that flowed through me. I would become these characters and play out the plot of the play. I had no ego of my own and picked up whatever ego would be instilled in me in the moment.
Recently i feel like I dont have the identity I used to...I feel like I have no identity anymore other than characters and i become dissociated in everyday life but I can still hold on to tiny shreds of the massive ego i had once...but its difficult...its difficult for me to play me without slipping into other characters and alternate personalities.
I feel distant in day to day life and unable to converse normally or even remember things that happened a couple of minutes ago...my memory seems to constantly reset and I forget where I am or what Im doing unless I see it written down or I am reminded.
I fear that Im losing it.
Dude im not far gone like you say you are, but i certainly know what you mean. mush have dissocociated me so badly i feel you bro... ive tripped to much and abused this beautiful tool of the mind
You cant undo anything youve alrady done, just acceptance and perserverance friend
IF not get some psychiatric droogs
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Cactilove
Controversial Mystic
Registered: 02/17/11
Posts: 4,826
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Re: cant trip without dissociating [Re: joemolloy]
#14397085 - 05/03/11 09:49 PM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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I agree with you in some points this time Joe, O.P. you need to take a good break. You could have dissasociative disorder, the symptoms you described match the diagnosis. my friend has this and goes into alternative identities, although in his case, he as I used to know him is gone completely while his alters come out. Did you have any really difficult trips or childhood trauma by any chance? If this is what you think you may have look it up to see if your symptoms match and go to a professional. They can perscribe you medicine, but it's addictive and makes you feel a bit different. Best way is therapy where you can work on something called integration or the fusion of all personalities joined together in one. Also find out if your alternate personalities are the same or alike whenever you experience the episode.
-------------------- Orgone Conclusion...Bringing OTD to PS&P since 2007.
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Psicodelico
Just another psycho
Registered: 01/21/11
Posts: 246
Loc: Brazil
Last seen: 6 years, 1 month
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Re: cant trip without dissociating [Re: bholzer]
#14398295 - 05/04/11 04:18 AM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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Why does he need to prove anything he says? Oh, maybe because he said that psychedelics destroy your brain and consequently your life? You know, shit like this is what make people still stereotype these drugs, especially with this idea that psychedelics makes you paranoid, schizophrenic or whatnot. By the way, I did not mean that one cannot psychologically breakdown and have hardcore badtrips, that is part of the process and experience. If you do not want to deal with such events, why even bother taking them? If you are using psychs you are very likely to pass through a bad one. The most enlightening experience I've ever had was after a heavy badtrip on lsd. If you disagree with me it's fine but jumping to conclusions that he is loosing his mind is nonsense, the guy even said he's been tripping almost every weekend, that can also be a factor. Peace
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bholzer
quasi-scientist
Registered: 03/22/11
Posts: 2,409
Last seen: 11 years, 9 months
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Re: cant trip without dissociating [Re: Psicodelico]
#14398972 - 05/04/11 09:14 AM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Psicodelico said: Why does he need to prove anything he says? Oh, maybe because he said that psychedelics destroy your brain and consequently your life? You know, shit like this is what make people still stereotype these drugs, especially with this idea that psychedelics makes you paranoid, schizophrenic or whatnot. By the way, I did not mean that one cannot psychologically breakdown and have hardcore badtrips, that is part of the process and experience. If you do not want to deal with such events, why even bother taking them? If you are using psychs you are very likely to pass through a bad one. The most enlightening experience I've ever had was after a heavy badtrip on lsd. If you disagree with me it's fine but jumping to conclusions that he is loosing his mind is nonsense, the guy even said he's been tripping almost every weekend, that can also be a factor. Peace
You misquoted him pretty badly. He said SOME people's minds. Your mind is different from your brain. There have been cases where psychedelics bring out mental disorders that people are predisposed to having. That's what he means.
That's not a point that you can really argue.
-------------------- Use these substances wisely, they have the ability to cause life altering realizations.
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