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Humbled
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Registered: 01/19/08
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*DELETED*
#14357805 - 04/26/11 09:21 PM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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Post deleted by Psilocelium<p>Reason for deletion: Babblings of drug induced psychosis
Edited by Humbled (11/10/12 05:06 AM)
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jivJaN
yes


Registered: 08/09/08
Posts: 4,245
Last seen: 10 years, 9 months
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Re: Family Interaction Psychology Study~Is my family lying or am I way off? [Re: Humbled]
#14359584 - 04/27/11 04:58 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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Sounds intense.
so... you believe that you have actually been there before and that your family is hiding it from you..
or
that you were having all these weird experiences because the green and red lights made you somehow have a partial trip/flashback ?
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--------------------- All my posts in this forum are strictly fictional. They are derived from an acute mental illness , from which i am forced to lie compulsively. I have never induced any kind of mind altering substance in my life and i have no intentions whatsoever of doing anything illegal. If I have ever suggested such a thing it would have most likely been , due to my personality disorder and i probably do not remember it at all..
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LunarEclipse
Enlil's Official Story


Registered: 10/31/04
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Loc: Building 7
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Re: Family Interaction Psychology Study~Is my family lying or am I way off? [Re: Humbled]
#14359687 - 04/27/11 06:10 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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Quote:
Psilocelium said: My oldest sister was just married a few years ago to a guy she had known from college for a while. They both are taking courses in Psychology and I believe her husband Zach is majoring in it.
This entire story is somewhat complex but moreover, just plain discouraging for me. 
I apologize if any of this seems out of order, there are 2 separate incidences relating to each other, the first I will explain just happened this past Easter weekend. The 2nd incidence I believe to have occurred last Easter( 1 year ago).
So I am going to one of the many family get-togethers we have throughout the year for holidays as well as simple gatherings for dinner together etc....
My sister, Hope and her husband, Zach invited my parents and I to visit them at their college dorm on the Bethel College Campus.( I have been living with my parents ever since I broke up with my last girlfriend about 2 years ago.)
I asked them if I had ever been there before and they said I had not. Upon arriving in the parking lot, I felt a familiar vibe from the buildings and the disc golf course. My grandparents on my mothers side were there along with my grandma from dad's. An aunt and uncle were there with their young daughter of about 3 years as well as my moms sister.
We had dinner and conversation as normal, then hid easter eggs outside for everyone to have a little fun hunting them down. Money was hidden in some of the eggs for the adults and I made some easter bunny "nests" for the 3 year old to find
Everything seemed quite normal for the beginning of the day until my younger sister's boyfriend began talking about plutonium and uranium as well as different aspects of chemistry and their relevance to atomic bombs. We were talking back and forth with questions neither of us could answer so we used Zachs laptop to do some searches. Right as I was sitting there with him, I was struck with a hardcore feeling of dejavou. I didnt think much of it and the day went on.
After the rest of the family had left, my parents and I were staying overnight there with my sis and her husband. Zach blew up a queen size air matress for me to sleep in the living room area in front of pretty huge windows that stretch all the way across a 15 ft wall which overlooks a small lake. There are about 3 large Maple's and a couple evergreen on the steep slope down to the shore.
Once everyone was in bed and as I laid there listening to music having picked up and read the exact same book I had read before; I began to realize I had been in this place before. Many small details came flooding back to me. The very peculiar bumps on the ceiling in circular shapes, a rectangular, almost cross shaped indent directly above my air mattress, the pictures on the wall of their wedding, artwork, the couches, so many little things that it would take a lot of typing to explain every one.
This really got my attention after a few minutes of pondering these familiar feelings. I do have dejavou once in a great while, but NEVER memories that have this many significant and definitive aspects to them. I cant even remember my dreams for very long.
I was standing in front of the giant windows gazing at the trees lit up 2 red-tinted security lights that seemed to switch on and off either simultaneously or one at a time. Every time these lights would switch on and off, there was a set of 2 lights across the lake that would switch on and off exactly as the "security lights" would. If one switched off on the right side, the light across the lake would as well. This happened everytime.
The windows have this green tint to them which gives an eerie feeling when you look outside for a while. After about half an hour to 1 hour, the maple I happened to be looking at had its top leaves/branches shook by something. It appeared that either someone shook the tree or something did. It was not a natural shaking of the tree by wind or an animal.
As soon as I saw this, even more memories of this happening before hit me like a brick wall. I HAD been to this place before. I took no psychedelics at all and I take suboxone and adderall everyday for my scrips which never produce side-effects like this.
Everytime I would test this "shaking" theory just to make sure it really was happening, I would pick a maple tree and stare for a minute or two, not intensely but with a very relaxed mindstate. Sure enough, it would happen everytime. The very top of the biggest pine tree would begin to move as if it had arms and somewhat like pines do when you get a good dose.
This wasnt convincing as a "trip" since only the tops of the trees would move/shake like this. Everything else in the room had no characteristics as they would had I been tripping or having a "flashback". Watching the maples shake as they did gave me a very disturbing feeling and it made my eyes feel out of focus.
I asked my parents the next day about this with great seriousness and they swore to me that they nor I had ever been there.
Anyone know anything about current family relations psychology study techniques or programs?
I told my good friend about all of this in great detail and we both have been trying to find info about the use of Red and Green lights along with Ultrasonic wave technology/vibrations to trigger a conditioned response from people who have a history of psychedelic usage.
I am convinced this is not something I have manifested in my mind and I truly believe a very similar set of events happened last year which turned out differently in a very angry outburst from myself and my aunt/uncle, grandparents all walked in the door right away to intervene and say we love you and it's okay.
I know I could not have dreamed this traumatic experience that happened last year but I cant understand why my parents deny that it ever happened at all.
I appreciate anyone that can give me some insight to this series of events that I believe were controlled psychological therapy sessions/experiments.
What was the second incident from approx last Easter?
-------------------- Anxiety is what you make it.
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jivJaN
yes


Registered: 08/09/08
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Re: Family Interaction Psychology Study~Is my family lying or am I way off? [Re: LunarEclipse]
#14359993 - 04/27/11 08:23 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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he says right here :
I am convinced this is not something I have manifested in my mind and I truly believe a very similar set of events happened last year which turned out differently in a very angry outburst from myself and my aunt/uncle, grandparents all walked in the door right away to intervene and say we love you and it's okay.
I know I could not have dreamed this traumatic experience that happened last year but I cant understand why my parents deny that it ever happened at all.
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--------------------- All my posts in this forum are strictly fictional. They are derived from an acute mental illness , from which i am forced to lie compulsively. I have never induced any kind of mind altering substance in my life and i have no intentions whatsoever of doing anything illegal. If I have ever suggested such a thing it would have most likely been , due to my personality disorder and i probably do not remember it at all..
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Humbled
Local Budtender




Registered: 01/19/08
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Re: Family Interaction Psychology Study~Is my family lying or am I way off? *DELETED* [Re: jivJaN]
#14360810 - 04/27/11 12:11 PM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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Post deleted by PsiloceliumReason for deletion: ....more babbling......
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xFrockx


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Re: Family Interaction Psychology Study~Is my family lying or am I way off? [Re: Humbled]
#14360874 - 04/27/11 12:34 PM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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I doubt you're being experimented on.
These kinds of familiar feelings happen. The deja vu, if you will, can make it seem like you remember what is happening at the moment, rather than just experiencing it. It takes things that are there, and makes them things that were there before.
Now, it is possible that you were there before and your parents are trying to protect you from a bad memory. Its not a good thing to do hide from the truth like that. In any case, if it did indeed happen you should be able to easily remember the events directly preceeding and directly after, in causal order.
If you can't remember any details about the events leading up to or after the event you think happened last year, you may want to consider that you are making shit up.
How important is this whole thing to you? How much do you want to know that this is more than deja vu? If you want to know a lot, be careful, you just might trick yourself.
Personally, if I were you I would stop caring much about these coincidences, familiarities, synchronicities, and the like. The world in front of you is all change, there is no sameness. Enjoy the variety. Trying to find similarity in the world is just fudging the truth for sentimental reasons.
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