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OfflinePatlal
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I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me.
    #14354747 - 04/26/11 11:42 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

When people owe me money and don't pay me when they told me they would, I become extremely hostile and aggressive. I don't show it to them but I definitly feel the rage.

And yet, I stay polite when I talk to them.

Should I tell them what I want to tell them or stay polite?

I normally don't seek out confrontation, but for some reason I just want to flip out on them.

Should I?


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OfflineGreenvalley
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: Patlal]
    #14354764 - 04/26/11 11:44 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

dont suppress it but dont express it


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Offlinedruqs
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: Patlal]
    #14354768 - 04/26/11 11:45 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

yes, RAGE!








RAGE














Edited by druqs (04/26/11 11:46 AM)


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OfflineNewWavePeace
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: druqs] * 1
    #14354791 - 04/26/11 11:48 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Shits about to get REAL son.

:jefferson:


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Invisibleuber_aj
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: druqs]
    #14354793 - 04/26/11 11:49 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

You should:

A) Not take it personally

B) Not think you're a gansta who gonna bust heads if he don't get paid

C) Bring it up to them, tell them you're disappointed

D) Don't continue stressing and worrying over it

E) Don't lend them money again


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OfflinePatlal
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: uber_aj]
    #14354807 - 04/26/11 11:52 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

uber_aj said:
You should:

A) Not take it personally

B) Not think you're a gansta who gonna bust heads if he don't get paid

C) Bring it up to them, tell them you're disappointed

D) Don't continue stressing and worrying over it

E) Don't lend them money again




Words of wisdom.

I hear people talk about bottled up rage all the time... I never really related until now...

I don't like feeling like this...

I broke my own rules... Never ever lend moneyu to anyone...what was I thinking...

:huxleyfacepalm:


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Invisiblegerryjarcia
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: uber_aj]
    #14354817 - 04/26/11 11:54 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

the general rule about lending money is that you have to be comfortable with and in a financial position to potentially never see that money again.

money lent is like money spent, you may never see it again :shrug:

i personally live to close to the "poverty" mark to be able to loan anyone cash. i just don't do it.

i avoid having to rage on someone by cutting out the situation all together.


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"We are all intoxicated. We were born into an insane asylum, a world crazy-making. We believe what we see and hear. The real myth is the myth of sanity, of rationality: it's a disease that is eating away at the earth. All the poisons flow from our denial. We deny madness, we forget our crimes, we dismember the corpse, we imprison our children. We need poison to poison the poison, to remember the sacred nature of intoxication, the green body of the young god." ~ Dale Pendell


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OfflineBig Worm
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: gerryjarcia]
    #14354827 - 04/26/11 11:56 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

I'm in the same position as you OP.

I am keeping my cool until I get my money.

Then I'm just going to scratch that dude off.


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InvisibleLobsterSauceDiscord
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: Patlal]
    #14354832 - 04/26/11 11:57 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

Patlal said:
Quote:

uber_aj said:
You should:

A) Not take it personally

B) Not think you're a gansta who gonna bust heads if he don't get paid

C) Bring it up to them, tell them you're disappointed

D) Don't continue stressing and worrying over it

E) Don't lend them money again




Words of wisdom.

I hear people talk about bottled up rage all the time... I never really related until now...

I don't like feeling like this...

I broke my own rules... Never ever lend moneyu to anyone...what was I thinking...

:huxleyfacepalm:




Ya,people owing me money makes me mad as shit when they don't pay. I also don't show it but it ruins my mood and stays on my mind. Get out of the lending game.

To keep people happy,never give any inkling that you actually have spare money so that way you'll have a tiny chance of being asked at all.


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Offlinebbl337
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: gerryjarcia]
    #14354836 - 04/26/11 11:58 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

:shrug: I had a friend try to rip me off in poker last night and it pissed me the fuck off.  Was only a few dollar hand, but still, was enough to really irritate me.  The house rule is you "must call your hand correctly".  I said "I have 3 pair ER 3 of a kind, my bad" and gave me shit.  I got pretty pissy myself.  It's less the money than it is I'm always a nice guy, I expect it back.


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Offlinepouihi
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: Greenvalley]
    #14354841 - 04/26/11 11:59 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Assuming that you only lend money to people that you know very well, you should also feel comfortable to outburst if they fail you.

Quote:

Greenvalley said:
dont suppress it




agreed w/this part


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"If the doors of perception were cleansed everything would appear to man as it is, infinite."


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OfflineKada
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: Patlal]
    #14354842 - 04/26/11 11:59 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

Patlal said:
When people owe me money and don't pay me when they told me they would, I become extremely hostile and aggressive. I don't show it to them but I definitly feel the rage.

And yet, I stay polite when I talk to them.

Should I tell them what I want to tell them or stay polite?

I normally don't seek out confrontation, but for some reason I just want to flip out on them.

Should I?



OMG I do the same thing. Someone owes me 500 bucks and he keeps dodging me. When I finally get a hold of him he promises to pay me something but he "has bills." I do to mother fucker. I just stay nice and polite tho. I think I feel like if I get shitty with him he will just not pay me. I already want to beat the shit out of him because it's been 3 months. The amount was actually 650 but I told him just to give me 500 if he can pay me fast. Well now he thinks he just owes me 500 and he still hasn't givin me shit.

He says he is giving me 100 bucks this Thursday.

I loaned him this knowing it was a risk tho. :shrug:


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~The Cultivators Motherload~

"I am free, no matter what rules surround me. If I find them tolerable, I tolerate them; if I find them too obnoxious, I break them.
I am free because I know that I alone am morally responsible for everything I do." -Robert A. Heinlein

"There is no need for temples, no need for complicated philosophies.
My brain and my heart are my temples; my philosophy is kindness."-Dalai Lama

Live long and prosper.



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OfflinePatlal
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: bbl337]
    #14354864 - 04/26/11 12:02 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

How the hell can money affect our moods sooo fuckin much....

I' definitly never lending money to noone. I now understand why gangsters break legs over it...


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OfflineKada
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: Patlal]
    #14354889 - 04/26/11 12:06 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Indeed man. I hate when people owe me money. It's not like I'm super missing the cash, it's the fact that someone is fucking me over. I don't like being fucked with! :kingcrankey:

Damn it now I'm mad about that money again.  :rockets:


--------------------
~The Cultivators Motherload~

"I am free, no matter what rules surround me. If I find them tolerable, I tolerate them; if I find them too obnoxious, I break them.
I am free because I know that I alone am morally responsible for everything I do." -Robert A. Heinlein

"There is no need for temples, no need for complicated philosophies.
My brain and my heart are my temples; my philosophy is kindness."-Dalai Lama

Live long and prosper.



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InvisibleBest In The World
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: Patlal]
    #14354898 - 04/26/11 12:07 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

Patlal said:
When people owe me money and don't pay me when they told me they would, I become extremely hostile and aggressive. I don't show it to them but I definitly feel the rage.

And yet, I stay polite when I talk to them.

Should I tell them what I want to tell them or stay polite?

I normally don't seek out confrontation, but for some reason I just want to flip out on them.

Should I?




I'm going through the same thing right now, three people owe me more than $100 and yet I don't even contact them because I'm too lazy and fully aware of what they might say. But yo, I'm about to call them and tell them I need the money right now, so you should do the same :smile:


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Offlinepouihi
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: Patlal]
    #14354901 - 04/26/11 12:09 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

It's not about being "money", I would be fucked up with anyone to whom I lent something and didn't gave it back, it's about the attitude, the lack of respect they show for you.
It's about you trusting someone enough to borrow something that could even be a need for you and that person robs you as if it were nothing. :spank:


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"If the doors of perception were cleansed everything would appear to man as it is, infinite."


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Invisibleuber_aj
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: Patlal]
    #14354908 - 04/26/11 12:10 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Yeah, I've had nothing but bad experiences with lending money. Even a roommate who I was good friends with, whose parents would give him thousands of dollars any time he asked, fucked me out of $700 in rent and bailed to the Marine Corps.

I also once sold a beat-to-hell cadillac to an older black lady I worked with, I asked $1200, expecting to get maybe $500 out of her... only got $300 before she quit the job. I started another job a few months later, it was the same place she went to work at after screwing me over. She saw me in the hallway, gave me a worried look and quit the next day.

Nothing you can really do about it, I just look at it as a $900 lesson.


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InvisibleLobsterSauceDiscord
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: Patlal]
    #14354915 - 04/26/11 12:10 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

Kada said:
Quote:

Patlal said:
When people owe me money and don't pay me when they told me they would, I become extremely hostile and aggressive. I don't show it to them but I definitly feel the rage.

And yet, I stay polite when I talk to them.

Should I tell them what I want to tell them or stay polite?

I normally don't seek out confrontation, but for some reason I just want to flip out on them.

Should I?



OMG I do the same thing. Someone owes me 500 bucks and he keeps dodging me. When I finally get a hold of him he promises to pay me something but he "has bills." I do to mother fucker. I just stay nice and polite tho. I think I feel like if I get shitty with him he will just not pay me. I already want to beat the shit out of him because it's been 3 months. The amount was actually 650 but I told him just to give me 500 if he can pay me fast. Well now he thinks he just owes me 500 and he still hasn't givin me shit.

He says he is giving me 100 bucks this Thursday.

I loaned him this knowing it was a risk tho. :shrug:




I'd be sickened,I really would. I made a thread recently about this and the guy only owed me 40e but he owed another good buddy 300e and another 50e.

Supposed to pay the same day but took over a month. He still owes one guy 150e and he's dodging him left,right and centre.


Money really shows what people are like,seriously. If you're good enough to give it out they should be fucking good enough to pay it back when they're supposed or have a legitimate reason.



Quote:

Patlal said:
How the hell can money affect our moods sooo fuckin much....

I' definitely never lending money to noone. I now understand why gangsters break legs over it...




When people betray trust it's a terrible thing and the continued lack of paying is like the person is making a fool out of you and really doesn't give a shit about you and lacks any sort of empathy towards you at all.

Cunts.


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OfflinePatlal
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: Kada]
    #14354944 - 04/26/11 12:14 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

Kada said:
Indeed man. I hate when people owe me money. It's not like I'm super missing the cash, it's the fact that someone is fucking me over. I don't like being fucked with! :kingcrankey:

Damn it now I'm mad about that money again.  :rockets:




So I just called some guy that owes me cash... He told me I would have it in april.

Now I'm gonna get the 3rd it seems....

I cant kill him now cause otherwise I wont get paid...blablabla.

DO we have legal rights with that sort of thing? Or are we just stupid to do it...


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Invisibleshadyy
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: Patlal]
    #14354979 - 04/26/11 12:22 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

yeah, it's time to stop being polite and start being real
the real world: patlal

just don't be harsh


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ga ga ga eets eets how you gone be mad on vacation?
MONICA COULDN'T TELL TIME UNTIL SHE WAS 13


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Offlineguywiththegun
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: Patlal]
    #14354986 - 04/26/11 12:23 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Never lend money to friends unless you are prepared to lose both.


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Invisiblekoraks
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: shadyy]
    #14354989 - 04/26/11 12:24 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

shadyy said:
yeah, it's time to stop being polite and start being real




You can politely tell you how you feel the person if (s)he doesn't pay you back in time. Politeness and reality are not mutually exclusive.


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Invisibleshadyy
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: koraks]
    #14354997 - 04/26/11 12:26 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

:randy2:


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ga ga ga eets eets how you gone be mad on vacation?
MONICA COULDN'T TELL TIME UNTIL SHE WAS 13


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Offlinenice1
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: Patlal]
    #14355020 - 04/26/11 12:33 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

I was polite for months when my mate owed me money then I went mad and came down and said I'm not leaving till you get me my money - I'll camp here everyday and take every crumb that comes - I'll sell your TV and xbox to the first bidder.

He could see I was enraged - he paid about 2 hours later but he borrowed it off someone else :facepalm:

If they are clearly taking the piss then it comes down to who is harder.  Which one of you is gonna kick the shit out of the other one really :shrug: depends a lot on who you leant the money too and for what reasons, are they genuinely attempting to pay you back or are they mocking you?  Every circumstance is different but violence usually speeds up the process but then if they are some complete nutjob is it worth fighting over?  Make sure you asses your chances of winning well too, lol.


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Offlinejacobensis
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: nice1]
    #14355032 - 04/26/11 12:35 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

i would`nt flipp out on them but, i would kick them in the dick just to show them im for reals


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Offlinenice1
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: jacobensis]
    #14355054 - 04/26/11 12:43 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

I know a guy who is soft as margarine and every1 know it yet he deals large amounts of weed.  He works like a supermarket and just charges more to factor in for his losses (thefts) but its so sad cuz hes really trusting and lays on people who you know are going to run off with hundreds a pounds worth of weed. :facepalm:

He is owed thousands now its probably about 40k if he admitted it.  True he has made more than he lost but dam its still 40k of earnings robbed.  Hes even had big boys offer to buy the debts from him cuz they know they can go round and torture or take the money outta these chumps.


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OfflineTakura001
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: nice1]
    #14355080 - 04/26/11 12:49 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

I only lend large amounts of money to really good friends and people I can trust to pay me back, even if it takes awhile to get back.


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Offlinenice1
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: Takura001]
    #14355109 - 04/26/11 12:52 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Does it not annoy you that a so called friend doesn't have the decency to pay you back promptly?

It does me because it tells me that money or their enjoyment of spending is rated higher than our friendship.

I persoanlly never borrow from anyone.  If I don't have the money to buy it then I get a job and earn some then buy it.  Simple. lol.  I have forgotton my wallet before but I made sure I paid back the borrowed sum a day early to pay my respects to them for lending and trusting to me.


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Invisibleshadyy
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: nice1]
    #14355150 - 04/26/11 12:59 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

how long have they owed and how much


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ga ga ga eets eets how you gone be mad on vacation?
MONICA COULDN'T TELL TIME UNTIL SHE WAS 13


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InvisibleSenor_Doobie
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: gerryjarcia]
    #14355335 - 04/26/11 01:46 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

gerryjarcia said:
the general rule about lending money is that you have to be comfortable with and in a financial position to potentially never see that money again.






This is the only attitude to have when loaning money.  I would even tweak it a little and say that you should expect to never see it again.  Give the loan and dispose of any interest in ever seeing it.  If you can't do this then do not loan out money.


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OfflineDr. P. Silocybin
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: Senor_Doobie]
    #14355541 - 04/26/11 02:28 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

tony soprano said that you can't let someone owe you money for an extended period of time because eventually they will feel that they are doing you a favor by paying you back.

in my experience this is very true, It sucks ass hounding people for money, but you cant let it drag out.


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InvisibleA Day InThe Life
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: Patlal]
    #14355681 - 04/26/11 02:57 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

I don't have any worries with lending people money, often I'll lend them money and almost forget about it and then a month or 2 later I'll be flat broke and outta nowhere my friends will pay me back. I love it when that happens, especially when they all pay me back at once and its like I got a paycheck that I didn't even have to work for (kinda haha). Mind you, I only ever lend to a select few people that I know and trust to pay me back eventually.

When I owe people money though I don't like it, it sucks and I tend to stress about it till I pay them back.


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Invisibleuber_aj
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: A Day InThe Life]
    #14355710 - 04/26/11 03:05 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Man I can't agree more with you about how bad it feels to owe others money. I find it to be one of the worst feelings there is, b/c IME it lasts for the whole period of time I'm in debt. I've gone a week without any substantial food to avoid owing people.


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InvisibleBodhi of Ankou
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Re: I just discovered a bad side of my personality I didn't think was in me. [Re: uber_aj]
    #14355767 - 04/26/11 03:16 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

I was rooming with my uncles ex whos a massive drunk and when I left I felt kind of bad cause she was way behind on her bills and she was expecting me to be staying a while longer so I "loaned" her 300. 10 months still hasnt tossed a penny my way. Ive learned not to give a fuck about anyone else, financially.


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