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tiny_rabid_birds
Nocturnal



Registered: 11/08/05
Posts: 15,653
Loc: estados unidos
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tragedy has fallen upon the household of T.R. Birds! 1
#14354275 - 04/26/11 09:53 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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my discs! o! my discs... the entire lineup of my primary disc golfing discs ruined. this is not a good starting point for the story, though. so i'll go back to the beginning.
last night, somewhere between the hours of 3:30 and 4 i receive a tentative knock on my door. i answer the door in my boxers because it's 3:30, i'm drunk/stoned, and i don't give a fuck. it turns out that it's shirley (her name isn't actually shirley), the terribly cute neighbor girl i've had a crush on for a while.
"o hai, shirley. what brings you to my humble abode?"
"uhmm.. your house is on fire."
at which point i look to my right on the front porch and see the small blaze. it's dark, so i cannot tell exactly what is caught aflame. it wasn't a panic-worthy fire, so with a nonchalance i can only muster after so much whiskey and weed [a nonchalance which she later commented on with admiration], i slowly sat down and padded out the fire.
no big deal being that shirley warned me when she did, but her warning was critical in terms of me not being dead right now because 2 pieces of furniture were definitely catching, as were one of my sandals, a decorative gourd, the broken ashtray full of cigarette butts, and my disc bag. FFFFFFFFF FFFFFFFF FFFFFFF FFFUUUUUU UUUUUUUUUUU UUUUUU!!!!!
i'll be able to fix the porch well enough to not lose the security deposit. i don't really care about the furniture, as i feel the burns just add character. really sucks about my discs though.. not my discs, man! i fucking love each one individually and know them like my own body. fuck. as a result, i intend on getting into the nasty-ass water today to see if i can fish any out.
but hey, every cloud has a silver lining, right? the silver lining to this story is that afterward shirley and i toked and talked for an hour or so following the incident. we exchanged numbers and made vague plans to have breakfast together at some point. word.
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Razzl3Frazzl3


Registered: 07/31/09
Posts: 4,630
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Re: tragedy has fallen upon the household of T.R. Birds! [Re: tiny_rabid_birds]
#14354328 - 04/26/11 10:08 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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That sucks bigtime, but at least you're ok. Had my dad open the trunk once and my bag fell out. Damn dog chewed a hole through it in one bite. One of a kind disc too...
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Doc_T
Random Dude




Registered: 03/06/09
Posts: 42,395
Loc: Colorado
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Re: tragedy has fallen upon the household of T.R. Birds! [Re: Razzl3Frazzl3]
#14354343 - 04/26/11 10:12 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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Putting out a fire with your bare hands while wearing boxers is manly indeed. You need to tap dat ass, dude...
-------------------- You make it all possible. Doesn't it feel good?
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Tri High
Whigro


Registered: 05/02/08
Posts: 11,769
Loc: Monaghan, Ireland
Last seen: 11 years, 10 months
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Re: tragedy has fallen upon the household of T.R. Birds! [Re: tiny_rabid_birds]
#14354344 - 04/26/11 10:13 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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Shirley set the fire.
What, was she just walking by at 3:30 am and saw the fire and knocked on your door?
no way.
That person's a pyro. Major. Her friends were sitting across the street in the neighbor's bushes watching you stomp out a flaming paper bag of dogpoo.
Payback's a bitch 
raep
-------------------- you just need money to get laid - starfire_xes
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tiny_rabid_birds
Nocturnal



Registered: 11/08/05
Posts: 15,653
Loc: estados unidos
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Re: tragedy has fallen upon the household of T.R. Birds! [Re: Tri High]
#14354358 - 04/26/11 10:17 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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no no, i know how the fire started. drunk friend left a candle burning in an ashtray. i'm assuming it lit all the butts on fire, which proved to be too big of a flame with temps too high for the ashtray. a cool breeze probably caused it to break and the lit butts fell onto shit.
shirley initially came over to my house because she saw the flame and thought we were hanging out on the porch with a fire pit or something. when that wasn't the case, she knocked to let me know my house was on fire. haha.
edit: i wanted to post pics, but my camera batteries are dead and i don't feel like waiting for them to charge before i scrape the melted plastic off of my porch.
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Tri High
Whigro


Registered: 05/02/08
Posts: 11,769
Loc: Monaghan, Ireland
Last seen: 11 years, 10 months
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Re: tragedy has fallen upon the household of T.R. Birds! [Re: tiny_rabid_birds]
#14354361 - 04/26/11 10:19 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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Why don't girls know how to hump like boys do?
-------------------- you just need money to get laid - starfire_xes
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Mello Kitty
Beautiful Burnout



Registered: 12/04/08
Posts: 8,556
Loc: Sanriotown, Harmonyland
Last seen: 7 years, 5 months
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Re: tragedy has fallen upon the household of T.R. Birds! [Re: tiny_rabid_birds]
#14354370 - 04/26/11 10:21 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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thats quite a silver lining.! sounds like one of those chance encounters prompted by fate  breakfast is a rare and good opportunity to first "get to know" girl. im sure u will do well, whats a golf disc ?
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McMushrooms420
Here but not really.....



Registered: 09/17/04
Posts: 311
Last seen: 11 years, 10 months
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Re: tragedy has fallen upon the household of T.R. Birds! [Re: Tri High]
#14354384 - 04/26/11 10:24 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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I am glad you didn't die in a terrible house fire 
Good luck replacing your discs, I haven't gone in a few years since the last time I played I got a hole-in-one and decided to end my career on a high note!
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Tri High
Whigro


Registered: 05/02/08
Posts: 11,769
Loc: Monaghan, Ireland
Last seen: 11 years, 10 months
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Re: tragedy has fallen upon the household of T.R. Birds! [Re: tiny_rabid_birds]
#14354385 - 04/26/11 10:24 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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Quote:
Tri High said: Shirley set the fire.
What, was she just walking by at 3:30 am and saw the fire and knocked on your door?
no way.
That person's a pyro. Major. Her friends were sitting across the street in the neighbor's bushes watching you stomp out a flaming paper bag of dogpoo.
Payback's a bitch 
raep
I'm pretty sure she's just a pyro, broham.
-------------------- you just need money to get laid - starfire_xes
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tiny_rabid_birds
Nocturnal



Registered: 11/08/05
Posts: 15,653
Loc: estados unidos
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Re: tragedy has fallen upon the household of T.R. Birds! [Re: Mello Kitty]
#14354430 - 04/26/11 10:38 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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Quote:
ellenallien said: thats quite a silver lining.! sounds like one of those chance encounters prompted by fate  breakfast is a rare and good opportunity to first "get to know" girl. im sure u will do well
maybe. i'm not sure yet. i kinda left out a detail that may really change things. i don't know if she knows i'm straight. because when she knocked on my door, there was a dude sleeping in bed with me. i think she knows i like girls.. at least, i hope.
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Tri High
Whigro


Registered: 05/02/08
Posts: 11,769
Loc: Monaghan, Ireland
Last seen: 11 years, 10 months
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Re: tragedy has fallen upon the household of T.R. Birds! [Re: tiny_rabid_birds]
#14354435 - 04/26/11 10:40 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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How would she have seen your bed from the front door?
And why was there a huge dude sleeping with you? was he black?
-------------------- you just need money to get laid - starfire_xes
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tiny_rabid_birds
Nocturnal



Registered: 11/08/05
Posts: 15,653
Loc: estados unidos
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Re: tragedy has fallen upon the household of T.R. Birds! [Re: Tri High]
#14354456 - 04/26/11 10:46 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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1. all 3 of us chilled and toked. 2. he was too drunk to drive home and we kinda have history. 3. yes, he's black.
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Tri High
Whigro


Registered: 05/02/08
Posts: 11,769
Loc: Monaghan, Ireland
Last seen: 11 years, 10 months
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Re: tragedy has fallen upon the household of T.R. Birds! [Re: tiny_rabid_birds]
#14354474 - 04/26/11 10:49 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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Did he blow you?
-------------------- you just need money to get laid - starfire_xes
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Doc_T
Random Dude




Registered: 03/06/09
Posts: 42,395
Loc: Colorado
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Re: tragedy has fallen upon the household of T.R. Birds! [Re: tiny_rabid_birds]
#14354478 - 04/26/11 10:50 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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Quote:
tiny_rabid_birds said:
we kinda have history. 3. yes, he's black.
So what's wrong with a 3-way?
-------------------- You make it all possible. Doesn't it feel good?
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tiny_rabid_birds
Nocturnal



Registered: 11/08/05
Posts: 15,653
Loc: estados unidos
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Re: tragedy has fallen upon the household of T.R. Birds! [Re: Tri High]
#14354482 - 04/26/11 10:50 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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no.
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Tri High
Whigro


Registered: 05/02/08
Posts: 11,769
Loc: Monaghan, Ireland
Last seen: 11 years, 10 months
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Re: tragedy has fallen upon the household of T.R. Birds! [Re: tiny_rabid_birds]
#14354490 - 04/26/11 10:52 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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Has he blown you?
-------------------- you just need money to get laid - starfire_xes
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tiny_rabid_birds
Nocturnal



Registered: 11/08/05
Posts: 15,653
Loc: estados unidos
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Re: tragedy has fallen upon the household of T.R. Birds! [Re: Doc_T]
#14354505 - 04/26/11 10:55 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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Quote:
Doc_T said:
Quote:
tiny_rabid_birds said:
we kinda have history. 3. yes, he's black.
So what's wrong with a 3-way?
i'd be lying if i said i didn't briefly toy with thoughts on how to approach the subject. but i was much too tired for such nonsense at that point. it was quite late. i wanted sleep.
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