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Unfolding Nature Shop: Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order

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Anonymous #1

So I need a bit of advice.
    #14352219 - 04/25/11 10:13 PM (12 years, 10 months ago)

I've known of this girl for about oh 6 months or so, never really talked to her too much, just admired her on facebook and such.
It wasn't till like a week ago or so I saw her in downtown and striked a conversation with her, which went really really well, she seemed very interested in me, which I thought was amazing yeah?.


So now its a few days later (within those days I've been talking to her tremendously) and she asks me to come stay the night at her house? I thought that was just gonna be a fun time, But come to find out I end up having sex with her. And it wasn't like her just asking me to fuck her, It started with her rubbing me then it went from there ya' know?.

We hangout again, but this time at my place, with a huge group of people. We end up cuddling the whole time and making out..

Now here's the fun part guys!!
Come to find out she has a BF.
But apparently her bf doesn't show her any respect at all(she's VERY BIG on respect by the way) , never talks to her, and is just a ass to her. She say's she REALLLY likes me, and that she want's to date me.

I do like her a lot also. And would love to date her.
What do you guys think?.

Should I?.

This whole story make's me sound like the biggest ass in the world. But I just really want a couple opinions on this..
Please don't flame me :\

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InvisibleSleepwalker
Overshoes


Registered: 05/07/08
Posts: 5,503
Re: So I need a bit of advice. [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #14352278 - 04/25/11 10:20 PM (12 years, 10 months ago)

She's very big on respect, which is why she's fucking around behind her boyfriend's back? lol.

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OfflineMycjunky
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Registered: 07/25/09
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Re: So I need a bit of advice. [Re: Sleepwalker]
    #14352297 - 04/25/11 10:22 PM (12 years, 10 months ago)

You give respect to people based on the respect they give you so I can see how I'd understand that. However she would need to break it off with him real quick, and I'd keep my guard up for sure.

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Anonymous #1

Re: So I need a bit of advice. [Re: Sleepwalker]
    #14352305 - 04/25/11 10:24 PM (12 years, 10 months ago)

Like I said, The guy doesn't show her ANY respect at all. Whatsoever.
In no way shape or form.


Logic is a bit off in my head also, thus why I am asking you people.



@mcjunky  I would hope she does too.
I don't wanna sound like a hot head, or a "bad ass".
But there's no reason for my guard to be up, he is in no way a threat to me.

Edited by Anonymous (04/25/11 10:25 PM)

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OfflineBaSSidio Head
Pebble Wrestler
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Registered: 03/29/11
Posts: 577
Loc: Highcountry, NC
Last seen: 11 years, 10 months
Re: So I need a bit of advice. [Re: Sleepwalker]
    #14352327 - 04/25/11 10:26 PM (12 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

Oweyervishice said:
She's very big on respect, which is why she's fucking around behind her boyfriend's back? lol.




:whathesaid: I was in a similar situation and, from personal experience, people don't change (even if she REALLY likes you).  It may be great until you get in a fight or something, and you will be that asshole bf she cheats on.  Go for if you'd like, you guys might be fine, but I would not trust her for shit.


--------------------

What's from the earth is of the greatest worth.:potleaf: :mushdance:
So before u knock it, try it first and you'll see it's a blessing and it's not a curse.

Edited by BaSSidio Head (04/25/11 10:27 PM)

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InvisibleSleepwalker
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Registered: 05/07/08
Posts: 5,503
Re: So I need a bit of advice. [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #14352358 - 04/25/11 10:32 PM (12 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
Like I said, The guy doesn't show her ANY respect at all. Whatsoever.
In no way shape or form.




But she's so big on respect that she stays with him anyway. lol.

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Invisiblerackem
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Registered: 11/27/09
Posts: 14,024
Re: So I need a bit of advice. [Re: Sleepwalker]
    #14352406 - 04/25/11 10:40 PM (12 years, 10 months ago)

dude..

if you want to be with her stay with her..

99 percent chance her boy is a complete jackass and doesnt care for her so in her mind its really already over.

shit like this happens all the time. dont sweat it and just make it foward if you do end up dating her and she finds somebody new just ask that shes upfront with you about it.

dunno man.. if she is worth the time stick with it.


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OfflineMycjunky
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Re: So I need a bit of advice. [Re: Mycjunky]
    #14352929 - 04/26/11 12:23 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

I don't mean keep your guard up because of him. I mean be careful in trusting her. Any girl that would cheat I would worry about dating, and any girl dumb enough to allow a guy to treat her like shit and not just break up with them to begin with instead of cheating on him would also cause me suspicion.

My guess is she's rationalizing by saying he's an asshole, the same could happen to you so be careful.

Edited by Mycjunky (04/26/11 12:24 AM)

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Invisiblerackem
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Re: So I need a bit of advice. [Re: Mycjunky]
    #14352996 - 04/26/11 12:37 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

Mycjunky said:
I don't mean keep your guard up because of him. I mean be careful in trusting her. Any girl that would cheat I would worry about dating, and any girl dumb enough to allow a guy to treat her like shit and not just break up with them to begin with instead of cheating on him would also cause me suspicion.

My guess is she's rationalizing by saying he's an asshole, the same could happen to you so be careful.




very good point..

the older i get it seems to be  a little different. if she hasnt gotten herself in a postion she doesnt know how to get out of it quickly or overnight it could take longer..

but the quoted poster has a very valid point.. but in order to have a relationship you better be able to go into with a clean slate of mind. with a closed mind your better off going into the relationship with a timed bomb


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Offlinei h4te rs
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Registered: 08/19/10
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Re: So I need a bit of advice. [Re: Mycjunky]
    #14353585 - 04/26/11 05:12 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

Mycjunky said:
I don't mean keep your guard up because of him. I mean be careful in trusting her. Any girl that would cheat I would worry about dating, and any girl dumb enough to allow a guy to treat her like shit and not just break up with them to begin with instead of cheating on him would also cause me suspicion.

My guess is she's rationalizing by saying he's an asshole, the same could happen to you so be careful.




Seeing as they've only been going out since.. the 3rd of this month. I think that's about that length of time  it would take someone a bit oblivious to realize that the person is a shmuck, while still giving them a bit of a chance to show them respect and a chance to show the good side.

Also, she is going to break up with him. She now has given up on him, he makes her cry, is an ass, doesn't really talk to her, Just uses her as an accessory just to say he has a girlfriend..


--------------------
All posts are intended for fictional or educational purposes only.

No statements in any post or message by myself should be taken as fact. Use of contained information or opinions may be in violation of local, provincial, and/or federal laws.

Edited by i h4te rs (04/26/11 05:14 AM)

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Offlineguywiththegun
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Registered: 03/31/09
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Re: So I need a bit of advice. [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #14353635 - 04/26/11 05:41 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
Like I said, The guy doesn't show her ANY respect at all. Whatsoever.
In no way shape or form.





Maybe she doesn't deserve any...


--------------------
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Invisiblesandi
omg


Registered: 04/11/11
Posts: 796
Loc: M6 (Butterfly Cluster)
Re: So I need a bit of advice. [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #14353688 - 04/26/11 06:06 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

Yeah, no. Unless you don't care that she cheated on her BF, then go ahead. I find most people think that you can cheat if you can justify it somehow (just like she did). If your BF is an asshole, dump him. If you're still with someone and you cheat, in my book, I don't give a fuck - you're a cheater. Maybe you need to be cheated on to feel that way. Plus, you know, how she didn't bother to disclose that fact to you until after you had sex. Not cool bro. That kind of person will just end up cheating on you eventually for something silly you do. Plus, how do you really know that even if she goes out with you, that she's not going to continue to see him? Who knows if what she said is even true? If she'd told you before you did it, and said she was going to break up with him soon anyway, then maybe...but I would steer clear of her if you're looking for an actual relationship that might go somewhere.


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InvisibleCyclohexylamine
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Re: So I need a bit of advice. [Re: Sleepwalker]
    #14353695 - 04/26/11 06:10 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

Oweyervishice said:
She's very big on respect, which is why she's fucking around behind her boyfriend's back? lol.




--------------------
Yes this is tymo - I just changed my name

Have you ever had a dream that you were so sure was real? What if you were unable to awake from that dream? How would you know the difference between that dream world and the real world?


There is NOTHING better than feeling that warm dissociative fuzz creeping up your body from IM K
Something abut that anaesthetic rush... :inlove:

Qualitative Research Chemical Effects and Experiences
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Offlinehailtothethief
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Re: So I need a bit of advice. [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #14353902 - 04/26/11 07:33 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

She sounds like a class act.  Better put a ring on it asap.

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Offlinei h4te rs
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Re: So I need a bit of advice. [Re: sandi]
    #14355295 - 04/26/11 01:36 PM (12 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

sandi said:
Yeah, no. Unless you don't care that she cheated on her BF, then go ahead. I find most people think that you can cheat if you can justify it somehow (just like she did). If your BF is an asshole, dump him. If you're still with someone and you cheat, in my book, I don't give a fuck - you're a cheater. Maybe you need to be cheated on to feel that way. Plus, you know, how she didn't bother to disclose that fact to you until after you had sex. Not cool bro. That kind of person will just end up cheating on you eventually for something silly you do. Plus, how do you really know that even if she goes out with you, that she's not going to continue to see him? Who knows if what she said is even true? If she'd told you before you did it, and said she was going to break up with him soon anyway, then maybe...but I would steer clear of her if you're looking for an actual relationship that might go somewhere.





I actually Did know she had a BF
She told me.. And I saw them together.


--------------------
All posts are intended for fictional or educational purposes only.

No statements in any post or message by myself should be taken as fact. Use of contained information or opinions may be in violation of local, provincial, and/or federal laws.

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Offlinefbi365
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Re: So I need a bit of advice. [Re: i h4te rs]
    #14357404 - 04/26/11 08:08 PM (12 years, 10 months ago)

She obviously isn't into her boyfriend.  Go for it, but son't be surprised if she ends up doing the same thing to you.


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OfflineHalsfield

Registered: 07/25/09
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Re: So I need a bit of advice. [Re: fbi365]
    #14358304 - 04/26/11 10:26 PM (12 years, 10 months ago)

It doesn't sound at all like she might just be using you to get back at her boyfriend? That might not be what you want to hear but you have to decide for yourself too.

She has a fight with her b/f, she meets someone new that's  nice and obviously wants her, she cheats on her b/f with a new guy to show the b/f that she isn't owned by him, and now you're in the middle of this.  If she really wanted out she would break up with this guy and be with you.  Until she breaks up with this guy I would not agree to see her again.  If she can't do a simple thing like that it isn't an honest relationship.

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Offlinei h4te rs
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Re: So I need a bit of advice. [Re: Halsfield]
    #14359680 - 04/27/11 06:07 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

Halsfield said:
It doesn't sound at all like she might just be using you to get back at her boyfriend? That might not be what you want to hear but you have to decide for yourself too.

She has a fight with her b/f, she meets someone new that's  nice and obviously wants her, she cheats on her b/f with a new guy to show the b/f that she isn't owned by him, and now you're in the middle of this.  If she really wanted out she would break up with this guy and be with you.  Until she breaks up with this guy I would not agree to see her again.  If she can't do a simple thing like that it isn't an honest relationship.





This is exactly what I did. I had not seen her till she ended it w/ him (which was today).
And now I am w/ her


--------------------
All posts are intended for fictional or educational purposes only.

No statements in any post or message by myself should be taken as fact. Use of contained information or opinions may be in violation of local, provincial, and/or federal laws.

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OfflineBipolarbear
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Re: So I need a bit of advice. [Re: i h4te rs]
    #14359741 - 04/27/11 06:44 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

I hope it works out for you.  Keep us posted, we'll be here for you when she demonizes you for some reason and fucks someone else. 


I actually hope that last part doesn't happen to you but I've seen this situation way too many times to not be jaded about the eventualities.  Maybe the old boyfriend really was an ass and didn't deserve her but unless he was cheating on her I don't condone cheating nor do I think it's one of those things a person does once.

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Invisiblesandi
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Re: So I need a bit of advice. [Re: i h4te rs]
    #14359835 - 04/27/11 07:23 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

i h4te rs said:
I actually Did know she had a BF
She told me.. And I saw them together.




Ah, I didn't get that from the original post, but what I said is still what *I* would do...but it's your heart, not mine :smile:  If it's worth a possible broken heart to you, just go for it.


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