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Offlinebholzer
quasi-scientist


Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 03/22/11
Posts: 2,409
Last seen: 11 years, 7 months
Should I take a hiatus?
    #14330572 - 04/21/11 10:58 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Okay, so let me lead with, I am a pretty experience psychonaut. I know the ins and outs, and I've done a number of substances.

Let me also say, I have had slight issues with depression and anxiety over the years. It always comes in waves though. There will be a period of a couple months where I'm perfectly okay, then for a few months, I'll have a rough patch.

Recently, I had a pretty difficult (but amazing) aya trip. I won't go into details, but you can read it here. Since then, I've been feeling pretty rough. Kind of as though things are out of place in my life. Hard to explain, but things just are off.

I have an amazing girlfriend, but that's about the only thing that really is firmly okay. I'm not sure if this has all been brought on by that trip, or if it was just coming anyway. Let me also say, towards the end of that trip, I got the feeling that I needed to take a break from drugs. At the time though, I just thought it was the aya talking.

I'm on probation, and I am having a little bit of trouble money-wise. So that is definitely a little bit of stress to add. My question is, do you think I should have listened to the aya when it told me to lay off? Should I find a hobby and spend my time doing some other stuff?

I have been pretty preoccupied with psychs lately, so it would be rough to give up on them right now! I need some second opinions.


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Use these substances wisely, they have the ability to cause life altering realizations.


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OfflineDesignatedTripper
Drop Lsd, Set your mind free.
Male


Registered: 04/10/11
Posts: 204
Loc: Canada Flag
Last seen: 10 years, 6 months
Re: Should I take a hiatus? [Re: bholzer]
    #14330693 - 04/21/11 11:15 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

If you think it would be worthwhile stopping for a while until things calm down you should probably do so. Remember one of the key elements of tripping is your mindset. So if you are having a rough time and are fighting depression, tripping won't make it any better. I suggest you take a break for a while until you get your life under control, but I can't really speak for you as I don't know you very well. Do whatever you think is best.


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Drugs to do list:                     
- LSD 
- Psilocybin Mushrooms  - Mescaline
- DMT (smoked)  - Ayahuasca
- MDMA  - Salvia
- Weed  - DXM
- Codeine


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Offlinebholzer
quasi-scientist


Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 03/22/11
Posts: 2,409
Last seen: 11 years, 7 months
Re: Should I take a hiatus? [Re: DesignatedTripper]
    #14330722 - 04/21/11 11:19 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Thanks for the input. I know nobody can tell me for sure, since they don't know me well, but just some general input on what people think is nice.


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Use these substances wisely, they have the ability to cause life altering realizations.


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Invisiblejoemolloy
DMT is Bullshit


Registered: 04/12/09
Posts: 6,525
Re: Should I take a hiatus? [Re: bholzer]
    #14330751 - 04/21/11 11:23 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

You've been a busy little bee on this forum lately.  You've got the bug and the bite and the fever.  I don't think you should listen to the ayahuasca - it'll never shut the fuck up or give you a straight answer.  Its kinda like the Bible in that sense.  You ever read that shit?  You should listen to yourself.  You know where each road leads and you know how each road is paved.  You know where your troubles in life stem from, no?  Clear your mind a bit, let it heal, get your head in order, your thought processes functioning back at optimum levels and then when you are ready, scramble those eggs again for fun.


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Don't PM me with bullshit.  I don't sell or trade cactus and I don't know where you can get any, other than your mother's ass.


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Offlinebholzer
quasi-scientist


Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 03/22/11
Posts: 2,409
Last seen: 11 years, 7 months
Re: Should I take a hiatus? [Re: joemolloy]
    #14330786 - 04/21/11 11:29 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

joemolloy said:
You've been a busy little bee on this forum lately.  You've got the bug and the bite and the fever.  I don't think you should listen to the ayahuasca - it'll never shut the fuck up or give you a straight answer.  Its kinda like the Bible in that sense.  You ever read that shit?  You should listen to yourself.  You know where each road leads and you know how each road is paved.  You know where your troubles in life stem from, no?  Clear your mind a bit, let it heal, get your head in order, your thought processes functioning back at optimum levels and then when you are ready, scramble those eggs again for fun.




I have been, surprised you noticed! I'd always been a lurker but finally decided to get active.

I think this is pretty sound advice, and probably what I was leaning toward anyway. Thanks


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Use these substances wisely, they have the ability to cause life altering realizations.


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Invisiblejoemolloy
DMT is Bullshit


Registered: 04/12/09
Posts: 6,525
Re: Should I take a hiatus? [Re: bholzer]
    #14330838 - 04/21/11 11:36 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Yeah, I always had trouble taking a break from it.  Within a few days, my decision to take a break would mysteriously disappear and before I knew it, I'd be tripping again.  It's strange how that works, the complete and total disintegration and forgetfulness of previous pledges to take a stop.  And of course there was a tremendous pull to the drugs, after all, it allowed me access to the "real" me, the feelings that I suppressed, in addition to hints and clues of my divinity.  Sobriety can't compete with such magic.  And it truly is magical in the fucking hobbit and elf sense.  Sobriety and the straight life can't compare to what it feels like in that place, right?  So we dive back in for more and let it tickle our thoughts, let it have an orgy with our ideas, and skullfuck the sense out of us.  It's good stuff, ain't it.


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Don't PM me with bullshit.  I don't sell or trade cactus and I don't know where you can get any, other than your mother's ass.


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Offlinebholzer
quasi-scientist


Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 03/22/11
Posts: 2,409
Last seen: 11 years, 7 months
Re: Should I take a hiatus? [Re: joemolloy]
    #14330857 - 04/21/11 11:40 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

I guess that's where the fine line between addiction and fun is. It''s all about how you handle it. You're probably spot on about going back to it pretty quickly. The second I get my hands on some acid or shrooms, I won't hesitate to take them. I have some pretty tough resolve as you can tell.


--------------------


Use these substances wisely, they have the ability to cause life altering realizations.


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Invisiblejoemolloy
DMT is Bullshit


Registered: 04/12/09
Posts: 6,525
Re: Should I take a hiatus? [Re: bholzer]
    #14330940 - 04/21/11 11:52 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

I do admit that these drugs have an anti-addictive quality to them.  For me it took over two years to get a handle on it, and it had nothing to do with my personal self control, of which I have too little.  It had to do with trips that were horrifyingly retarded, effects that made me retarded when I was sober(thanks ayahuasca), and finally boredom (thanks mescaline)with the drugs.  On the one hand, at least you know that you'll never reach the level of crackhead with these drugs, but in the process of heavy use you can do psychological damage to yourself (thanks mom).

And I think what happens to many former psychedelic enthusiasts is that they just switch to more consistent drugs that'll get them high instead of rape their soul(thanks other drug discussion).


--------------------
Don't PM me with bullshit.  I don't sell or trade cactus and I don't know where you can get any, other than your mother's ass.


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Offlinebholzer
quasi-scientist


Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 03/22/11
Posts: 2,409
Last seen: 11 years, 7 months
Re: Should I take a hiatus? [Re: joemolloy]
    #14330966 - 04/21/11 11:55 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

That's exactly what I hope doesn't happen. Of course it's all personal choice, but I just want one day to grow out of my psychedelic use comfortably. I feel like I'll smoke grass for the rest of my life, but I want to be able to just transition comfortably out of psychedelia.


--------------------


Use these substances wisely, they have the ability to cause life altering realizations.


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OfflineDesignatedTripper
Drop Lsd, Set your mind free.
Male


Registered: 04/10/11
Posts: 204
Loc: Canada Flag
Last seen: 10 years, 6 months
Re: Should I take a hiatus? [Re: joemolloy]
    #14330999 - 04/22/11 12:02 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

joemolloy said:
I do admit that these drugs have an anti-addictive quality to them.  For me it took over two years to get a handle on it, and it had nothing to do with my personal self control, of which I have too little.  It had to do with trips that were horrifyingly retarded, effects that made me retarded when I was sober(thanks ayahuasca), and finally boredom (thanks mescaline)with the drugs.  On the one hand, at least you know that you'll never reach the level of crackhead with these drugs, but in the process of heavy use you can do psychological damage to yourself (thanks mom).

And I think what happens to many former psychedelic enthusiasts is that they just switch to more consistent drugs that'll get them high instead of rape their soul(thanks other drug discussion).




You've got good points there. That's why any drug needs to be taken with a level of moderation. No one should be tripping constantly or doing any other drug for that matter.

On another note: "DMT is Bulltrue" Made me laugh so hard.


--------------------
Drugs to do list:                     
- LSD 
- Psilocybin Mushrooms  - Mescaline
- DMT (smoked)  - Ayahuasca
- MDMA  - Salvia
- Weed  - DXM
- Codeine


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Offlinepunkrocker292004
i am a liar
Male User Gallery


Registered: 12/17/09
Posts: 2,921
Loc: Flag
Last seen: 2 years, 4 months
Re: Should I take a hiatus? [Re: DesignatedTripper]
    #14331022 - 04/22/11 12:06 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

DesignatedTripper said:
If you think it would be worthwhile stopping for a while until things calm down you should probably do so. Remember one of the key elements of tripping is your mindset. So if you are having a rough time and are fighting depression, tripping won't make it any better. I suggest you take a break for a while until you get your life under control, but I can't really speak for you as I don't know you very well. Do whatever you think is best.




^^^^^^this^^^^^^


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EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW

on a long enough timeline the survival rate for everyone drops to zero-tyler durden

watch me


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Invisiblejoemolloy
DMT is Bullshit


Registered: 04/12/09
Posts: 6,525
Re: Should I take a hiatus? [Re: bholzer]
    #14331033 - 04/22/11 12:09 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

At what point isn't it personal choice?  At what point are there conflicting desires that are both so damn compelling?  On the one hand, you want to stop or decrease your usage and on the other hand you're drawn to it.  The stronger desire will always win and I don't believe we have any input as to deciding what that stronger desire is.  It just overpowers the weaker one and if you're lucky, the one that is healthy for you in the long run will win.


--------------------
Don't PM me with bullshit.  I don't sell or trade cactus and I don't know where you can get any, other than your mother's ass.


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Offlinebholzer
quasi-scientist


Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 03/22/11
Posts: 2,409
Last seen: 11 years, 7 months
Re: Should I take a hiatus? [Re: joemolloy]
    #14331039 - 04/22/11 12:10 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

joemolloy said:
At what point isn't it personal choice?  At what point are there conflicting desires that are both so damn compelling?  On the one hand, you want to stop or decrease your usage and on the other hand you're drawn to it.  The stronger desire will always win and I don't believe we have any input as to deciding what that stronger desire is.  It just overpowers the weaker one and if you're lucky, the one that is healthy for you in the long run will win.




Well said sir


--------------------


Use these substances wisely, they have the ability to cause life altering realizations.


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