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OfflineBlowMiNose
Some rise, Somefall, Some climb

Registered: 10/14/02
Posts: 1,189
Loc: The Dirty South...
Last seen: 19 years, 9 months
Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: silversoul7]
    #1483140 - 04/22/03 04:28 PM (21 years, 3 months ago)

Ive had a similar experience. I dont feel like getting to much into it right now, but she pulled me in, and i fell in love. Quit coke for her. She turned the cold shoulder on me out of nowhere, and i struggled for a lil while...then turned back to my hard drugs. I decided to quit all these drugs a few weeks ago, and she comes back and starts talking to me again. Im doing my BEST to ignore her and stay away, only because i dont want these feelings that have lingered for FOUR MONTHS to come back full force. I cant handle it... i either need her, or i need the closure she NEVER gave me...


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***--- Have You Opened Your Third eye?! ---***
      :::disclaimer:::this stuff was done in my dreams

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OfflineI_Fart_Blue
Stranger

Registered: 06/25/02
Posts: 3,495
Loc: SItting on the Group W Be...
Last seen: 20 years, 6 months
Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: silversoul7]
    #1485040 - 04/23/03 12:52 AM (21 years, 3 months ago)

Man silver, I know you've talked about this before in OTD and I've commented on it somewhat.  :frown: It hurts. It hurts worse than anything in the world. I think I've already told you this before, but hell its kinda theraputic to talk about it.

I met this girl, we'll call her J, when I was 11-12, whenever I started 6th grade, and she and I kinda became friends. I know I was young, but there was just something about her. We shared a few classes that year and the next. The next year I wrote her a note telling her how I felt. She didn't return my feelings, at least not openly, though there was always some speculation by others, and myself, that she may have had some sort of feeling otherwise (There was some speculation actually through high school too). I layed some pretty heavy shit on her for being as young as we were. I didn't really expect her to return my feelings though. I was dorky, kinda goofy looking. She was a cute, popular gymnist. We still kinda talked through the rest of the school year, but things would remain forever changed between us.

The next year, 8th grade, J and I didn't have any classes together. Probably a good thing, give me some room, let me grow, yada yada yada. Well I did grow. I went through a lot of changes emotionally and socially. I wasn't terribly popular though I had a few close friends that would remain by my side all through high school. After being turned onto Hendrix, Jefferson Airplane, and the Doors by my father I really stood out among my classmates, but certainly not in a good way, though the other kids who played guitar loved me b/c I was a bass player...anyway....We drifted apart kinda, and kinda not. Our English teacher in 7th grade was cool as hell and played a big role in our lives, one of those life changing teachers(she turned me onto Zep  :grin:). 8th grade year a bunch of the popular females from my 7th grade class were bringing her an Xmas present, and J stopped by my class to drag me a long. It was kinda random. I really wanted to transfer to a different school though, I didn't fit in with a lot of my peers because I was always somewhat emotionally more mature than them, and a good bit smarter. I was miserable.

Freshman year in high school J and I didn't share any classes. We had an assigned study hall durring the same period throughout the school. One of my good friends and J were in the study hall which was headed by my favorite teacher. I used to get passes to go in there just to chill with my friend, talk about history and politics with my teacher, and of course see J. However J and I would kinda get into it, we were kinda ugly to eachother at some points. What it was over I have no clue at this point and time, though I am sure that it was trivial as hell, and that there was probably some underlying tension. My teacher got tired of this and I stopped going.

My sophmore year we shared the same study hall. We had pretty much stopped talking and I really had no desire to be around her, though all this while I still felt the same way about her that I always had. I would go hang out in the computer lab. This year of school I was introduced to my girlfiriend (who is still my girlfriend nearly 7 years later) who attended another high school. I started going out with her for a few reasons, though ashamedly I must admit one of which was an attempt to make J jealous. Well that didn't work out too well.  :smirk: I fell for my girl....somewhat. Our realationship has always kinda been rocky thanks to my feelings for J. Anyway, J and I really didn't talk much over the next year or two. I should really say that we didn't talk any. I grew out of my socially akward phase and had befriended a lot of students across a wide array of high school culture, though I was still a loner for the most part.

Senior year of high school we have a government class together. The desks in the class were split down the middle so that they kinda faced eachother. J picked a desk directly opposite of mine. I had no choice but to look at her. Somehow we forgot our misplaced agressions and were civil. Furthermore we would kinda flirt back and forth. It was odd and very pleasent at the same time. One day we were kinda writing a note back and forth. The contents of which I do not really remember, though the last thing I wrote on there, which she did not read in class, was 'I love you'. Well, that was a bit of a mistake. Again, just some more shit that I layed on her that she probably had no interst in hearing. She had a boyfriend and was all into him at the time. Blah. She and I had a few more interactions our senior year. I again wrote her a letter, and no metter how loserish this sounds, the note that I had wrote her in 7th grade was a bit of a joke between us, and it seemed like a good idea t the time. I just essentialy told her how I felt, and that my feeling had never changed, and that I hoped we would remain close after graduation. This happend roughly 4 years ago this week. I remember the time frame because it happened right after Columbine. J's best friend was not a giant fan of me. I was know for wearing a trench coat (gasp! but it was a Swiss army surplus coat). My letter kinda freaked her friend out, and she made some mention of that to the guidance dept. I get a note in my art class a few days later telling me that I have some sort of meeting with J in the guidance dept. WTF? Anyway her friend though I was gonna go psycho. Long story short, after talkikng about our relationship some, and about our relationships with our significant others, J and I had a good laugh about the situation. I will say that it left me pretty emotionally fucked and overwhelmed. We graduated a while later, blah. She runs into me after the ceremony ( I had been trying to avoid her), gives me a hug and tells me goodbye. That was the last time I saw her, almost 4 years ago.

Anyway, college took us to opposite ends of the state. A few months into the first semester I get up the nerve, and acting on a hunch, I send out a random email to her just to see what if. I get a response back, and she's happy to hear from me, we exchange AIM names. We quickly grow close, at least IMO, and we spend a lot of time talking online. She actually would IM me first as it were. I thought our relationship was developing nicely. I was going through a rough period, you know college, living away from my GF, all that jazz. In additon, my grandfather was very ill so I was dealing with that. J and I helped eachother out as she was going through some stuff in here life too. I broke up with my GF the next semester, and J and I continued to talk online. We talked late into the morning sometimes, talking as long as 7 hours once. She broke up with her BF ( later found out that he had hit her once or twice  :mad:), and she and I continued to talk. At the end of the semester we come back home to the same town. I figured what the hell, why not give her a call. She was surprised to say the least, though maybe not in a good way. We talked a handful of times, before she told me that maybe she had given me the wrong impression, and that she thought that we should just go back to talkin online. WTF? We had talked about some very serious shit before including some secrets about our life that we had never shared with anybody.

I dropped out of college. My grades werent that good, and I moved in with a friend from HS who was attending a local college. My old GF and I got back together but J and I still talked online fairly frequently, and again most our conversations were initiated by her. I came clean with my GF about J because it had been weighing on my mind for years. That wasn't easy but she took it like a champ. Everything continued as normal for another year or so until about this time two years ago when J tells me that she's met somebody online. Great. They started going out (he lives in our state, but goest to AF school out in CO). She and I talk about the stuff, though I sure as hell was upset, but I could tell that she was happy.  :crazy: She gets kinda goofy over guys. At this point, and for the past few months she had been initiating all of our conversations. I was trying to distance myself from her. Well I'm not sure what happened, but she stopped talking to me roughly two years ago this June.  :frown:

My life has actually been great over the last two years though. I got a job at a brokerage firm, and through my hard work while going to college part time, I managed to gain entrance into one of the most selective colleges in all of the country (Its in top 5 for public colleges). Life is great, and for once I think that I am actually happy.

Litterally not a day goes by when I don't think about J though. It sucks, and sucks bigtime. I will dream about her from time to time. That shit really fucks with my head. She's still with her BF, I know that much. I don't know if I want to talk to here again, but I'm afraid that if I don't she might get engaged to her BF. Not that I want to break up a relationship, but my feelings still ring true, and I don't want to stop until I feel like I've done every possible thing within my power to make sure she knows how I feel about her.

Silver, I realize this has been one hell of a long post, and that I've pretty much given you my life story, but hopefully you've taken the time to read it. You're not alone man. Such a huge chunk of my soul feels like its missing. I don't think anybody can ever competely fill it up. I've fallen for two other girls here within the last year, you will meet somebody. As blackroselobo said, your first love never dies. I think this is so true. Do all you can to let this girl know how you feel, and then let go. There is nothing you can do. You can't make somebody have any feelings for you. Try to move on with your life, no matter how hard it might be. Find a new love in your life, just don't expect them to completely fill up the emptyness you feel. 


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"A study of the history of opinion is a necessary preliminary to the emancipation of the mind. I do not know which makes a man more conservative-to know nothing but the present, or nothing but the past." -John Maynard Keynes

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OfflineStrumpling
Neuronaut
Registered: 10/11/02
Posts: 7,571
Loc: Hyperspace
Last seen: 13 years, 2 months
Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: silversoul7]
    #1485080 - 04/23/03 01:17 AM (21 years, 3 months ago)

I know the solution:

Give the separation time and effort.


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Insert an "I think" mentally in front of eveything I say that seems sketchy, because I certainly don't KNOW much. Also; feel free to yell at me.
In addition: SHPONGLE

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OfflineBlowMiNose
Some rise, Somefall, Some climb

Registered: 10/14/02
Posts: 1,189
Loc: The Dirty South...
Last seen: 19 years, 9 months
Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: Strumpling]
    #1485358 - 04/23/03 06:54 AM (21 years, 3 months ago)

I read your whole post blue. Im sorry about that. Talking off/on is a real big mind fuck. I think it is for the better that you stopped talking to J. It seems that she was making is real hard to forget her. Im sorry. And silversoul, good luck to you


--------------------
***--- Have You Opened Your Third eye?! ---***
      :::disclaimer:::this stuff was done in my dreams

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OfflineMighty Bop
Big Boy

Registered: 06/30/01
Posts: 1,994
Loc: Nowhere
Last seen: 2 years, 1 month
Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: BlowMiNose]
    #1502814 - 04/28/03 11:11 PM (21 years, 2 months ago)

Just got out of a similar situation. Fell for a girl after only 2 months. Then she decides she's "not ready for a relationship". Whatever. But she still wants to be friends. You know how it goes. So we broke up and then we are still occasionally talking. I tell her I hung out with this other girl and she freaks out. It was so ridiculous. We decided on no contact for 3 months. Too bad she starts emailing and calling me after a couple weeks. I never answer the phone and only reply to her emails just to be nice. Less than a month to go before I contact her just to say hi. We'll see how that turns out. Saw her at the store the other day but I don't think she saw me. Didn't really affect me that much so it's all good.

Bottom line, give it time. You'll get over her.


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I got a buddy with United Fruit, get ya started...

Trade List

Edited by mighty_bop (04/28/03 11:11 PM)

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Anonymous #1

Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: liftedoff420]
    #1515600 - 05/02/03 05:38 PM (21 years, 2 months ago)

"im only 17 but..."

Shroomery Disclaimer

"By use of The Shroomery Website or BBS, you are verifying that you are 18 years of age or older. This site is not intended for minors, so if you are under the age of 18, please come back when you can meet this requirement."


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OfflineJourney
newbie
Registered: 06/27/04
Posts: 117
Last seen: 19 years, 8 months
Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: ]
    #1516302 - 05/02/03 11:23 PM (21 years, 2 months ago)

Check out the "First shroomery consensus" thread in general questions, I'd say about a third of them are underage

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OfflineSWAY
SurrealPhantasmicSubConscious

Registered: 04/11/03
Posts: 71
Loc: A Dream...
Last seen: 21 years, 1 month
Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: ]
    #1517637 - 05/03/03 01:26 PM (21 years, 2 months ago)

This thread isn't about age, i wouldn't dare make it about that

I don't think anything is being harmed, worry about yourself


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?People keep searching for happines in the outside, what they don't know is that it's in the inside?
?In an infinite universe, anything that can exist, must exist? Bear
?To think too long about doing a thing often becomes its undoing? Eva Young

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OfflineJourney
newbie
Registered: 06/27/04
Posts: 117
Last seen: 19 years, 8 months
Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: SWAY]
    #1518022 - 05/03/03 05:50 PM (21 years, 2 months ago)

I agree, I was giving more examples of people who are underage who use this board becasue I didn't want the guy to leave. There have been a lot of very smart good contributers who are underage, I dont think anyone cares if they're underage or not, its just for legal reasons

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OfflineSWAY
SurrealPhantasmicSubConscious

Registered: 04/11/03
Posts: 71
Loc: A Dream...
Last seen: 21 years, 1 month
Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: ]
    #1518268 - 05/03/03 08:12 PM (21 years, 2 months ago)

ok...

I can't get over girls either, i watch and dream about a certain one constantly and can
get kinda obsessed even if i never even talked to them before, and if i ever had any kind of relationship with them or took my shots at them then i still would think about them and couldn't get my mind off them.., i guess they stay in your mind no matter what.. but time and learning new tricks and new people will help alot i bet


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?People keep searching for happines in the outside, what they don't know is that it's in the inside?
?In an infinite universe, anything that can exist, must exist? Bear
?To think too long about doing a thing often becomes its undoing? Eva Young

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Invisiblesilversoul7
Chill the FuckOut!
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Registered: 10/10/02
Posts: 27,301
Loc: mndfreeze's puppet army
Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: silversoul7]
    #1529854 - 05/08/03 02:59 AM (21 years, 2 months ago)

I've been thinking about her a lot lately. I've been losing sleep over her. I've been drinking to try and numb the pain. I've had thoughts of suicide--well, sort of. I haven't actually had the desire to really kill myself, but I've thought about threatening to in order to get her to talk to me. It's sick, I know. I just don't know what to do about this pain. Apparently, she's now blocked my number on her cell phone. This shit is ripping me apart inside. I can't stop obsessing about her. There's this void she's left behind that nothing can fill. I don't know how much longer I can hold out before this destroys me.


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"It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong."--Voltaire

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OfflineSheepish
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Registered: 04/02/02
Posts: 10,137
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Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: silversoul7]
    #1530069 - 05/08/03 05:27 AM (21 years, 2 months ago)

You need to let go, before it gets any worse. The more obsessed and clingy you become, the more she will try to avoid you. :frown: And that is not good. You don't want to end up with a restraining order. NO girl is worth ruining your life over. Move on, please. It may not seem like it, but some day you will find a girl that will make you happier than she ever did.   

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Offlineenotake2
Stop Bush's war
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Registered: 01/30/03
Posts: 1,457
Loc: Comfy chair in my lounger...
Last seen: 13 years, 1 month
Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: silversoul7]
    #1530130 - 05/08/03 06:41 AM (21 years, 2 months ago)

Man you gotta try to stop thinking about her. Everytime she enters your head tell yourself "STOP" and distract yourself with something else. It will seem hard at first, but with time it will get easier and easier. Tell yourself positive things like it's her loss, plenty of fish in the sea. Also dwell on things you don't like about her or why it wouldn't have worked anyway, etc, if you have to dwell on it! Man you don't want her if she doesn't want you - where's the fun in that.


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Computer games don't affect kids. I mean if Pacman affected our generation as kids, we'd all be running around in a darkened room, munching pills and listening to repetitive electronic music.

"Being bitter and hateful is like drinking a vial of poison and hoping the other person gets sick" FreakQLibrium

"My motto from here on out is: If someone or something (including me) in my life is conducting themselves in such a way that they can be seen on Jerry Springer, it's time to take out the garbage!!! When you stop taking their behaviour personally and see their antics as a true reflection on their character, it becomes absolutely nauseating." Anon. on abusive relationships.

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OfflineBlowMiNose
Some rise, Somefall, Some climb

Registered: 10/14/02
Posts: 1,189
Loc: The Dirty South...
Last seen: 19 years, 9 months
Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: silversoul7]
    #1531315 - 05/08/03 03:23 PM (21 years, 2 months ago)

I know how you feel silversoul. I thought i was over this girl, but it just came back all of a sudden. I know its hard to fill the space that is now empty, but the first step is trying to. Don't fill it with alcohol or drugs... i know its hard not to. I tend to do that, and it just makes things worse. I got back into the gym, and am working out. Stuff like that keeps me occupied, and HELPS me get my mind off her. Suicide is definitely not the answer, so get that thought out of your head. Think of it this way...if she isn't making you happy, then its not worth it right? Goodluck, and keep us posted. I believe in ya


--------------------
***--- Have You Opened Your Third eye?! ---***
      :::disclaimer:::this stuff was done in my dreams

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Invisiblesilversoul7
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Posts: 27,301
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Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: silversoul7]
    #1543391 - 05/12/03 10:24 PM (21 years, 2 months ago)

Today, I saw her online on AIM. I knew she wouldn't respond to me if I IMed her, but I did it anyway just to say a few things that I felt needed to be said. Here's what I wrote:

Quote:

I've kept wondering why you've been avoiding me, but it doesn't matter to me anymore. I see now that for some reason, you don't want to be friends anymore, and I accept that. All I want to do is say goodbye. I hope that somehow we might meet again someday.

I realize you're dealing with a lot of shit right now, and I know sometimes it seems like I don't care, but I do. I have been selfish and inconsiderate in the past, but I've been working on that. I understand you're mad at me about something, and knowing what I've done in the past, it could be one of several things, but I just want you to know that I've changed. All I want is for you to be happy. If you're happier without our friendship, then fine. But if you ever have problems and you need someone to talk to, I'm here for you.

Goodbye, old friend. I hope you have a wonderful life.



Although I probably shouldn't have said anything to her at all, I feel that now I have a much more level-headed attitude about this whole situation. I won't be making any more attempts to contact her from now on. I've said what I had to say and now it's time to move on. I feel a whole lot better now.


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"It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong."--Voltaire

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OfflineBlowMiNose
Some rise, Somefall, Some climb

Registered: 10/14/02
Posts: 1,189
Loc: The Dirty South...
Last seen: 19 years, 9 months
Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: silversoul7]
    #1549235 - 05/14/03 08:08 PM (21 years, 2 months ago)

Sounds good silversoul! You did the right thing. Sometimes it feels good to try and "close the chapter" so to speak. If she doesnt try to contact you, then let it be. You don't need her anyway. Time to start a new chapter  :grin:


--------------------
***--- Have You Opened Your Third eye?! ---***
      :::disclaimer:::this stuff was done in my dreams

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OfflineTrAnCyNuGz
Stranger

Registered: 04/13/02
Posts: 419
Last seen: 15 years, 4 months
Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: silversoul7]
    #1559378 - 05/19/03 03:17 AM (21 years, 2 months ago)

SilverSoul,

I read what you IM this gurl, and it inspired me to e-mail the gurl I had problems with to make me feel a little better. I just needed some questions answered so I could move on wiht my life and forget about her. I just can't seem to completely forget her, w/o knowing what, and why what happend did happen.

I am rolling my ass off right now, and was when I e-mailed her. Only thing, my mail got returned :frown: Guess she no longer as that aol name and e-mail address. Damnit, I just wanted her to know how I felt :mad:

I dunno if I should call her and try talking to her, or just try to forget about it. I am a really shy guy though, and whenever I talked to her on the phone I got hella nervous and had butterflys in my tummy and stuff. I dunno what to do...She is dating one of my friends now, and it is really odd seeing them together.

Well, sorry for rambling. Good luck with your gurl problems and I really hope everything goes well for you, and you meet a new chick that blows her away!

 

Edited by TrAnCyNuGz (05/27/03 05:01 PM)

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Invisiblesilversoul7
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Registered: 10/10/02
Posts: 27,301
Loc: mndfreeze's puppet army
Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: TrAnCyNuGz]
    #1561071 - 05/19/03 06:32 PM (21 years, 2 months ago)

Do what you gotta do to let it go. I had to send her that IM for closure so I could move on with my life. I still haven't heard from her, but that's ok. I'm happy just knowing that I've said what I needed to say. If she doesn't like me, that's her problem, and I'm not going to worry about it anymore. She knows how I feel, and now there's nothing left for me to do but move on with my life.


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"It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong."--Voltaire

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OfflineDemiurge
creator ofworlds

Registered: 04/11/03
Posts: 693
Loc: Florida
Last seen: 13 years, 4 months
Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: silversoul7]
    #1561190 - 05/19/03 07:18 PM (21 years, 2 months ago)

Um, you guys need to stop being so needy with girls. No offense, I can really sympathise with your situations, but if you don't want this to hapen again then you have to stop this behavior. Why do you think all your girlfriends keep ending up with jerks? You don't have to be a jerk to for a girl to like you, but you should not be a "nice guy." Girls are rarely attracted to "nice guys." They will tell you that they are, but they are lying through their teeth! This doesn't mean that you have to be an ass hole, but it does mean that you have to stop being nice. Don't tell girls how you feel about them. This will turn them off. Do not compliment them, buy them things, etc. This will turn them off. If you want to get this chick back, start dating other girls and rub it in her face. Act like you don't care about her. Try to hook her up with other guys. I don't want to sound like an ass hole, but you have to stp being the clingy, needy, nice guy. Girls like the confidence and independence that jerks have. Don't be a jerk, but don't do anything a jerk wouldn't do. Catch my drift?


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Just another animal embeded in a technological coral reef extruded psychic objects...

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Invisiblesilversoul7
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Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: silversoul7]
    #1725290 - 07/17/03 03:56 PM (21 years, 11 days ago)

I finally heard back from her today. All it was was just an email wishing me a happy birthday, but it still meant a lot to me.


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"It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong."--Voltaire

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