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Invisiblesilversoul7
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Registered: 10/10/02
Posts: 27,301
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Can't get over this girl
    #1432950 - 04/06/03 05:11 AM (14 years, 2 months ago)

There's this girl I fell in love with a while back. We were never officially together, but we did have sort of a "fling" for a while, but then she said she just wanted to be friends. Well, actually, that happened several times. It was sort of an on-again/off-again things until finally it was off for good.

For a long time, I tried to be friends with her, but my feelings for her were never far from the surface, and sometimes I would just have an outburst of those feelings, and it would make her feel bad to hear it. So I told her that maybe we should take some time away from each other while I get my head together and work through these feelings until I'm truly ready to just be friends.

Well, after about a month or two, I felt like I had reached that point. I had learned to love myself and feel comfortable by myself, or at least so I thought. So, I emailed her, saying I was finally ready to be friends again. I didn't get a reply. I sent a few more emails, and left some messages on her answering machine. Still no reply. Then one time I got through to her on the phone, but as soon as she recognized my voice, she hung up. So at that point I knew for sure that she was avoiding me. To this day, I still don't know why.

Obviously I was hurt, but after a while, I learned to stop the urge to contact her. At the same time, I suppressed my emotions, and went about life acting like it didn't bother me. After all, I had plenty to be happy about. My DUI case had been dropped, I had just gotten a new job, and I was doing great in all my classes. Everything was going great except for this, and it was always at the back of my mind.

Still, I kept a Stoic face and refused to let it get to me--until tonight. I was inspired to write a song about her tonight, and half-way through it I started getting all misty-eyed, and once I had finished singing it, I just broke down and cried for the first time in months. All the emotions that I had been suppressing all that time just came pouring out. When I looked over the song lyrics again, I realized that they were significant in that this song was an admission to myself that I still love her.

I'm not sure what I'm looking for in posting this here, except maybe a little sympathy or maybe a few people who can relate. I dunno. I just had to get this out.


--------------------


"It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong."--Voltaire


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Anonymous #1

Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: silversoul7]
    #1432963 - 04/06/03 05:22 AM (14 years, 2 months ago)

- Post History Deleted Upon User's Request -


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OfflineAislingGheal
A wave on the ocean
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Registered: 02/22/03
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Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: silversoul7]
    #1433104 - 04/06/03 10:29 AM (14 years, 2 months ago)


I'm sorry that your going through that, it's misery I know. I hope things work out for you one way or another. I don't know what to say it's a hard situation, just wishing you the best.


--------------------

"I hate having to pick between the lesser of two evils. But I'm glad Obama was elected. McCain was another war monger. I'd rather deal with our country going into debt than trying to take on afghanistan...oh wait FUCK!" - Fungus_tao


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Invisibleadrug

Registered: 02/04/03
Posts: 15,800
Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: silversoul7]
    #1433198 - 04/06/03 12:07 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

I can relate. I had a relationship in the past that was rather intense and short-lived which unfortunately ended rather abruptly due to his manic depression. I had been head over heels in love with him from the moment I met him, and then as things started to get serious, he just quit talking to me out of nowhere. This went on for a few months, then finally we started connecting again by email. I basically told him that I forgive you and still love you and I don't blame you for your illness. Though its a different kind of love now. Hard to describe, no the typical "man/woman/sex" kind of love. We've corresponded through email for the last 5 years and a part of me still loves him to this day. Its almost like he's here in spirit, even though he's thousands of miles away. Sometimes I wish things had worked out differently, but the way I see it, everything happens for a reason. If we had stayed together, I wouldn't have had my daughter whom I love dearly. Hope this put things in another perspective for you. We have all loved and lost. You just have to learn to live for YOU and even though you may not be able to forget, try not to spend too much time pining over lost loves. The cliche is true, there's plenty of fish in the sea.


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Invisiblesilversoul7
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Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: adrug]
    #1433284 - 04/06/03 01:03 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

Thanks. That post really gave me hope.


--------------------


"It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong."--Voltaire


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OfflineMarkostheGnostic
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Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: silversoul7]
    #1433306 - 04/06/03 01:13 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

This is one of humankind's universal experiences - unrequited love. It is painful, not pleasurable, but you will now be more capable of empathy with others who have had this experience. You will have grown by having had it. Maturity embraces both pleasure and pain. Children want only pleasure and fun and games.



--------------------
γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself


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OfflineAlobar
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Registered: 01/13/03
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Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: silversoul7]
    #1433474 - 04/06/03 02:44 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

For those of us who are going through this or have gone through it: We're the luckiest people on earth.


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InvisibleZwieback0
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Registered: 08/23/02
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Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: Alobar]
    #1433535 - 04/06/03 03:26 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

Keep your head up. You have done everything possible on your part to rekindle your friendship with her, its up to her now. Try to away from this emotional attachment you currently have for the girl. Look at it this way...there are millions of better girls who will love in the world, it just takes time to find her. Take this experience and make it into a positive, it will make you a stronger person.


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Invisibleseti
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Registered: 12/31/02
Posts: 92
Re: Can't get over this girl *DELETED* [Re: Zwieback0]
    #1433642 - 04/06/03 04:37 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

Post deleted by seti


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Invisiblesilversoul7
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Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: seti]
    #1434035 - 04/06/03 08:52 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Maybe it would be imperative to discover the answer to this so the whole scenario doesn't repeat itself in the future?



I have a few guesses as to what might have caused this, but even when I think about all of them collectively, it still doesn't add up. The only way I'll know why she's doing this is if she tells me.


--------------------


"It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong."--Voltaire


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Invisibledjfrog
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Registered: 10/23/00
Posts: 3,710
Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: silversoul7]
    #1434468 - 04/06/03 11:14 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

Nahh, I don't think you really want a reason. Time to move on.


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Invisiblesilversoul7
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Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: djfrog]
    #1434488 - 04/06/03 11:20 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Nahh, I don't think you really want a reason. Time to move on.



Easier said than done.


--------------------


"It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong."--Voltaire


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InvisibleLeViTY
I missed theark.

Registered: 10/10/02
Posts: 1,988
Loc: CA
Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: silversoul7]
    #1434535 - 04/06/03 11:34 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

Gah, that's wicked...
I'm really sorry, I went through a similar situation where I didn't talk to a boyfriend for 9 months because I couldnt reach him, (turned out he got sent away to rehab)

The truth is, time DOES heal. But it DOESN'T conceal... What I mean is that time can make you feel better, make the situation better, but it won't totally hide it. I won't lie to you, it will still hurt from time to time. But as time goes on, it will get better.

If you ask me, this girl doesn't deserve you. No one who ignores you and makes you feel unloved is worth your time.


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OfflineSheepish
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Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: silversoul7]
    #1438659 - 04/08/03 10:22 AM (14 years, 2 months ago)

I had a similar situation with a girl; she just closed off all contact, got back with her ex, and I made things worse by doing everything I could to get hold of her. It got too clingy and stalker like, and I finally realised that and gave up. A few months later, I actually got hold of her; I had sent her an email asking how she was doing, and she actually replied, and we chatted for a few weeks, but the same thing happened again - she gave me the cold shoulder. Nowadays, she won't even speak to me... why? I haven't the slightest clue why. I never treated her like shit, I was nothing but nice to her, and now she claims I spread rumours about her (I hate her, I'll give her that, but I have better things to do than spread untrue lies about her). Her boyfriend (who incidentally happens to be a guy I know from my old school who has done me a few favours) actually got angry at me online and told me to stop spreading lies behind her back. That got me so mad, and I spent days and days stuck in thought trying to figure out what the hell I did. I never did find the answer I was looking for because simply I hadn't done a single thing wrong to make her mad. So I said "To hell with her, why should I waste my time worrying about someone so sadly pathetic?" And I don't miss her one bit.
It IS painful, no doubt about it, but the most important thing is to move on. What use is the answer WHY she did that and will it really make the pain magically disappear? Ex's can be convining, manipulative and cold hearted fuckers, so try and focus your energy onto seeking an answer and love from someone who isn't doing your head in emotionally. It seems we shall never love again, and we are depressed for months after the break up. It's like a dark gloomy cloud that never lifts, and you cannot escape the memory of her. Everything reminds you of her, and you reminisce over the great times you had and it makes you so unbearable achey in your heart. But, that is all in the past. It can never be had again - that is important to understand. The first step is to finally let go, and know that what was, never shall be again, and it's better this way.
Give it time.


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InvisiblePhoshaman
L.A, L.A., BigCity of Dreams.
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Registered: 06/02/99
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Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: Sheepish]
    #1438963 - 04/08/03 12:55 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

Let it be.

I just got out of court today because of my ex. Although I won, it still hurts to look at her. And I'll be damned if I didn't admit it is the worst pain in the world.

I could be crying like a baby.

I could be crazy and insane.

I could try to get back with her, only to have my heart broken again.

I could do a lot of things.

I've chosen to get over it.

PM me if you want to talk.



--------------------


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Offlineliftedoff420
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Registered: 01/17/03
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Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: Phoshaman]
    #1441196 - 04/09/03 12:54 AM (14 years, 2 months ago)

i used to trip hard over girls...im only 17 but i think im sorta learning that all that lovey wubby relationship shit is all a waste of time

my situation, this girl, lets call her J, tells me she likes me freshman year....i couldnt give a fuck...i wasnt into her that much...2 years later we are still friends but i never had feelings for her...always just sweating the hot hoes in my high school....well junior year rolls around and we start doing shit...and i find myself head over heels for her...fucking thinking bout her all the time...talking onthe phone and shit...she says she likes me...im even more in...about a week before valentines day i decided to pull some kiddy shit and ask her to be my valentine...i even bought her a fucking pair of red and white sneakers.....well 3 days before valentines and like a week after she says she likes me...i find out she gets back with her ex, whos a fucking jerk to her and they break up like every week

well a month later....they have broken up like 3 or 4 times and gotten back together...and i dont even talk to her anymore...i decided in my brain that she was stupid for getting with her ex, and that i shuoldnt let a bitch get ME down...becuase i should be concerned about me.....it was her birthday today and i didnt even say anything.....o well......

my moral....think about yourself, dont let another persons stupid ass mistakes make YOU feel bad...just pick yourself up, smoke a spliff or down a 40, go out and have fun


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OfflineTrAnCyNuGz
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Registered: 04/13/02
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Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: silversoul7]
    #1464765 - 04/16/03 07:40 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

Dood, I can totally relate to you on this. There's this Korean gurl at my school that I started liking. I told a friend that knew her, and he told her I liked her. Shit seemed all good, she told him I was hot as hell, and she wanted me to talk to her. Now I am pretty shy around gurls I like, and especially cause she was older than me.

Well we started talkin, and it seemed like we had a thing goin for a few weeks. I don't really know what ever happened, but all the sudden we quit talking. I tried a few times, but she just seemed like she didn't wanna speak to me. I tried e-mailing her a few times, and leaving a few messages...no reply.

It had been about 2 & 1/2 months since I had spoken to her, and I felt like I was over her. Then, recently on my vacation to hawaii, my friend I went with(one who told her I liked her) well we were rolling on some Motorola X pills, and I started thinking about her. I dunno how, with all the fine asian/hawaiian gurls around me. But I did. I let the feelings out to my friend, and he told me how she would talk about me, and say she still liked me, blah blah blah.

So we end up callin his best friend while we were rolling, just to let him know I guess :confused: He was telling him how I felt about this gurl and what not, and how they need to hook me up. Oh, and it turns out that this dood we are talking to, his sister is best friends with this gurl.

Well, I get back from Hawaii, and immediatley start talking to her. We hang out a few times, she gives me her new cell number. Well I go over to my friends house one night, was supposed to get the hook on some rolls for him, and I come over to this chick and my friends bestfriend making out with her. Then they tell my friend to ask for some X so they can roll to. Now this confused me cause she was a goody good when I tried to get with her. Now there is no fucking way I could roll on X and sit there and watch this gurl I can't get over, makin out, huggin and grabbin on one of my friends.

Havn't talked to her for a few weeks now, but she is still always on my mind :frown:

Sorry for the long boring story, just thought it would feel better to let it out. 


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OfflineJenherself
Just anotherchick

Registered: 03/12/03
Posts: 80
Loc: Alberta, Canada in a box
Last seen: 13 years, 10 months
Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: TrAnCyNuGz]
    #1471568 - 04/18/03 10:36 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

Awww, dude, *HUGS*. You seem like a very compassionate person. Its always so hard to get over someone, especially if you feel as though things are going great, and then they can you...you end up wondering where you went wrong, what you could have done differently, and these questions always seem to remain unanswered. I think one of the biggest reasons why you probably sat down and wrote a song and felt upset again is because of the way it was left between you and her. Sometimes closure can be a very handy thing, unfortunately she wasn't there to give that to you, and thats why things are still sort of lingering in your heart. Without closure it makes things alot tougher, it makes it harder to get over. It might not help you stop feeling for her the way that you do, but it will help some unanswered questions that maybe you may have deep in your heart if you could find out why she was avoiding you....maybe she's just as hurt and wants closure too.


--------------------
TO EACH THEIR OWN
****JENNY****


Edited by Jenherself (04/18/03 10:46 PM)


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Invisiblesilversoul7
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Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: silversoul7]
    #1482095 - 04/22/03 01:00 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

Update: Still no word from her. For a while I felt better, but then recently I've been losing sleep over her. Everything reminds me of her. When I close my eyes, I see her. I keep having flashbacks of the times that we've had together. To the outside world I look fine, but when I'm secluded in my room, I often break down into tears. She was my best friend in the whole world. She always used to be there for me when I needed her, but now I can't seem to reach her no matter what. This just seems so unlike her. Of all the people I've ever known, she's the last person I would've expected to do this to me. I don't know if I can trust anyone anymore.


--------------------


"It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong."--Voltaire


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Invisibleblackroselobo
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Registered: 04/30/02
Posts: 1,458
Loc: Sioux Falls SD
Re: Can't get over this girl [Re: silversoul7]
    #1483123 - 04/22/03 06:20 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

It will always be there when you love some one.
I have done the same thing. Wrote songs about it. Just a few here and there. And it did help. But I held it all up. And that shouldn't have been done.And some bad stuff happend. But I got lucky and got to talk to my ex about it and we are kinda cool about it.He was my best friend and I made my self remember that that was better then hate. I still have the love. I just have a new some one on my mind. Though I should have no resion to I just do.So he keeps me from killing my mind over it.
The first loves never die. Never. It maby just takes finding some one new to help dull it a little. I don't know if you are understanding this. But thats just what I think.And I wish you luck and love.


--------------------
Rock on! .


Edited by blackroselobo (04/22/03 06:23 PM)


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