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XUL
OTD Janitor



Registered: 03/16/05
Posts: 28,261
Loc: America
Last seen: 4 years, 2 months
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........why did I do what I just did...oh God...
#14280136 - 04/12/11 08:14 PM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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Tonight I broke down and did something terrible.
I decided to look up my ex on facebook. As I was doing it I was thinking "just stop, you shouldnt do this"... but I did it.
I was nervous as I was typing in her name. My heart was beating faster and faster. The screen loaded and BAM. I swallow hard and everything falls to the pit of my stomache and I feel sick. My head is light and I feel dizzy.
It was a picture of her with her new boyfriend...
It makes me want to cry.
Why the fuck did I do that. That was so dumb of me. Honestly the guy looks like a douchebag which makes me feel kind of good. Still. To know she is with another man. 
I have to get my head straight. It is now my duty in life to fuck women again. Next date I go on with the girl I have been seeing.... ITS FUCK TIME.

peace
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EdgeChaos
Still a stranger

Registered: 08/04/06
Posts: 2,071
Last seen: 6 years, 5 months
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Re: ........why did I do what I just did...oh God... [Re: XUL]
#14280221 - 04/12/11 08:27 PM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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You did it because you needed to.
It's almost a year since my ex and I broke up and I recently got on facebook to tell her happy birthday. She then friended me and my curiosity took over. my heart rate skyrocketed as I went through all of her previous posts in a sort of delusional rage. When I verified that she had indeed cheated on me and was currently with the guy I nearly puked.
In the end it was good for me to do it because I realized that I still had that shit all backed up from when we broke up. Now I still feel ill when I think about her but it's not near as bad and I actually feel a little sorry for her.
The worst part is that I let it stay with me for that long instead of just letting go.
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elliev
(ノ´∀`*)ノ

Registered: 04/10/11
Posts: 414
Loc: bay area
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Re: ........why did I do what I just did...oh God... [Re: EdgeChaos]
#14280286 - 04/12/11 08:37 PM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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OP, i think it's normal that people secretly check up on their exes in some shape or form.
It's okay! I'm sure you will meet someone who is 300 times as lovely.
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Raw
Muslim



Registered: 03/23/10
Posts: 1,419
Loc: USA West Coast
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Re: ........why did I do what I just did...oh God... [Re: XUL]
#14280304 - 04/12/11 08:40 PM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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Thats life dude. Move on you are important fuck em... Relationships only last so long. bitches come and go. Don't stress out over it and have a stroke.
~Raw
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XUL
OTD Janitor



Registered: 03/16/05
Posts: 28,261
Loc: America
Last seen: 4 years, 2 months
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Re: ........why did I do what I just did...oh God... [Re: EdgeChaos]
#14280433 - 04/12/11 09:00 PM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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Thanks guys.
EdgeChaos,
I think you are right. Before I read your post I went on a drive and thought about it. I realized that now I can stop dreaming about getting back together and finally let go.
The only thing now is... I instantly have been fantasizing about going back to visit college, seeing her, showing my tan muscular body off next to her boys fugly face and fat blubery fat ass, and then proceed by beating the shit out him.
Fucking fantasy's....
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EdgeChaos
Still a stranger

Registered: 08/04/06
Posts: 2,071
Last seen: 6 years, 5 months
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Re: ........why did I do what I just did...oh God... [Re: XUL]
#14281613 - 04/13/11 12:10 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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HAHA fantasy's yeah, I had to stop myself from finding out where the fucker lived because that would have made it all to easy... In my fit of insane internet digging I came up with quite a bit of info on the guy and it started to creep me out, so I stopped.
Just keep moving and don't let the bad times define you. Simply being happy is the best revenge.
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dshow
Nomad



Registered: 01/22/09
Posts: 5,255
Last seen: 12 years, 2 months
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Re: ........why did I do what I just did...oh God... [Re: EdgeChaos]
#14287505 - 04/13/11 11:17 PM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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I deleted my ex from my fb 2 years ago. The other day i saw her post on one of my friends fb. I saw the pic of her and the friend that backstabbed me. 
fucking A i couldnt get it out of my head.
I feel you.
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XUL
OTD Janitor



Registered: 03/16/05
Posts: 28,261
Loc: America
Last seen: 4 years, 2 months
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Re: ........why did I do what I just did...oh God... [Re: dshow]
#14288012 - 04/14/11 01:19 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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Quote:
dshow said: I deleted my ex from my fb 2 years ago. The other day i saw her post on one of my friends fb. I saw the pic of her and the friend that backstabbed me. 
fucking A i couldnt get it out of my head.
I feel you.
It did hurt when I first saw it. It even hurt that night. Then something clicked.
I was holding onto her because she was still pure to me and I thought there may be some kind of crazy chance we would find our love again.
Now since she is with another man I see her as impure and essentially a terrible bitch who left me for a fugly ass weirdo. I look at it like such - I fucked her body every which way. I HAD THAT ASS! Now I am moving on to the next...
Amazingly I dont think about her as much as I have naturally severed all compassionate feelings for her. That is great news for me. After 7 long months I can finally move the hell on.
Today was great. I broke through a mental block and decided that in after a few more weeks of dating I am going to see if the girl I have been dating wants to go steady with me. Wonderful!
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TRUMP 2020
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dshow
Nomad



Registered: 01/22/09
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Last seen: 12 years, 2 months
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Re: ........why did I do what I just did...oh God... [Re: XUL]
#14289568 - 04/14/11 11:37 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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thats is great
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EmeraldEyes



Registered: 04/05/11
Posts: 57
Last seen: 10 years, 11 months
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Re: ........why did I do what I just did...oh God... [Re: XUL]
#14290136 - 04/14/11 01:38 PM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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I've had people tell me how my ex boyfriend is doing. (Not that I even asked...)
At first it hurt. Not because I wanted him back or anything...I just couldn't believe the kind of girls he hooked up with after me. About 6 months after we broke up, he married the girl I always thought he cheated on me with. Then, about 2 months later, they separated because he was cheating on her with another ex girlfriend of his. They had a baby together and then he went behind this girls back and cheated on her with his EX WIFE. God, I can't believe I dated him for a year.
Anyways, at first it hurt that he married so soon after we broke up. It hurt me that I obviously didn't mean a thing to him. NOW, I'm happy that it worked out that way. I feel bad for all of those bitches that wanted him while we were together. They are the ones who are divorced or have a kid with a jerk.
Knowing these things about your ex will help you get over them. Look at it as closure.
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"Prohibition will work great injury to the cause of temperance. It is a species of intemperance within itself, for it goes beyond the bounds of reason in that it attempts to control a man's appetite by legislation, and makes a crime out of things that are not crimes. A Prohibition law strikes a blow at the very principles upon which our government was founded." -Abraham Lincoln
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ManianFH
living in perverty


Registered: 07/06/04
Posts: 14,748
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Re: ........why did I do what I just did...oh God... [Re: EmeraldEyes]
#14304709 - 04/17/11 05:07 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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Its only normal to check up, especially since if its the first time since, for some even multiple times. You spend a great deal of time and intimacy with a person, then are expected to just forget about it completely and move on? Maybe if youre a well trained buddhist monk.
I feel closer with myself after working through stuff like this. And that is always a good thing. The important thing is that you work through it in a positive way i guess.
-------------------- notapillow said: "you are going about this endeavor all wrong. clear your mind of useless fear and concern. buy the ticket, take the ride, and all that.... " ChrisWho said: "It's all about the journey, not the destination."
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memes
Blessed



Registered: 01/11/05
Posts: 27,785
Loc: In a Tree
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Re: ........why did I do what I just did...oh God... [Re: ManianFH]
#14304978 - 04/17/11 07:39 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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@op: sorry man 
its ok. we've all been there. you'll get past it.
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Buckthorn
Stranger

Registered: 07/25/08
Posts: 4,561
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Re: ........why did I do what I just did...oh God... [Re: memes]
#14305749 - 04/17/11 11:31 AM (12 years, 9 months ago) |
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i feel for you OP
been there, many times
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