Home | Community | Message Board


This site includes paid links. Please support our sponsors.


Welcome to the Shroomery Message Board! You are experiencing a small sample of what the site has to offer. Please login or register to post messages and view our exclusive members-only content. You'll gain access to additional forums, file attachments, board customizations, encrypted private messages, and much more!

Shop: PhytoExtractum Maeng Da Thai Kratom Leaf Powder   Kraken Kratom Red Vein Kratom   Original Sensible Seeds Feminized Cannabis Seeds   Bridgetown Botanicals Bridgetown Botanicals

Jump to first unread post Pages: 1 | 2 | Next >  [ show all ]
Offlineshroomie_glen
RedHotPussyLiquor
Male User Gallery


Registered: 03/01/06
Posts: 4,296
Loc: Narf Carolina Flag
Last seen: 11 years, 4 months
Undercover Cop Prostitute anecdote....
    #14256930 - 04/08/11 02:19 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

For the win I will now share just ONE story about how I LOVE fucking with the cops.... many more to come.....

Seriously though, I have been solicited by someone that I KNEW was an undercover cop (She joined the PD right out of highschool, but didnt recognize me because I looked a lot different than I did in HS) and fucked with her until I was FORCIBLY removed from her presence by undercover cops that came and picked me up and carried me a block away.

It went EXACTLY like this:
(I'm walking down ghetto assed street to my friends house with nothing to do but burn time)
This obviously undercover cop (female that I recognised as a cop but didnt recognise me) says:
"Hey Baby, how bout a date?"
ME-"Okay, want to go to WEndy's, you buying?"
(Undercover Prostitute U.P.) "NO, you know what I mean, a Date.... (licks lips)"
ME- " Ooooooohhhhh okay.... Well, I'm walking to my friends house want to come with me?"
U.P.- "How much you gonna give me?"
ME- "For what?"
U.P.-"Whatchu want?"
ME- "HOw much for a nude modeling session?"
U.P.-"No, I mean a blowjob, handjob, rimjob (proceeds to list off a litany of sexual favors along with prices)  Any of that sound good?
ME- "Hell NO.... I told you i just wanted a NUDE MODELING SESSION, no sex.  But I can pay you to get naked and JUST model for me."
U.P.-"No, I don't do that!"
ME- "A second ago, YOU told me you would lick my butthole for money, WHICH i DON'T WANT........ But you wont just pose naked for me and earn cold cash???" (which is totally legal)
U.P.- "No, I ain't doin that, if you don't want sex, then just move on...."

Now this is in broad daylight on a crowded ghetto block (2PM), there are probably like 20+ people within earshot.

ME-(shouting at TOP of my lungs capacity) "HEY EVERYBODY THIS SLUT WANTS TO LICK MY BUTTHOLE FOR MONEY, BUT I DON'T WANT HER TO..... SHE WON'T EVEN POSE NUDE FOR ME.... WHAT KIND GIRL WOULD DO THAT???? SEEEEEEEEMS LIKE A WHOLE LOT LESS WORK TO ME..... PLUS ITS LEGAL........"

At about this time, two dudes in flannel shirts with ballcaps and freshly grown facial hair, wearing t-shirts (obvious undercover cops) came and grabbed me by each arm and forcefully walked me to the edge of the block, and told me not to come back or they'd "mess me up"....



:ilold: and :ilold: and :ilold: all the way to my friends house.


--------------------

No. No, man. Shit, no man.  I believe you'd get your ass kicked sayin' somethin' like that man.

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Offlineshroomie_glen
RedHotPussyLiquor
Male User Gallery


Registered: 03/01/06
Posts: 4,296
Loc: Narf Carolina Flag
Last seen: 11 years, 4 months
Re: Undercover Cop Prostitute anecdote.... [Re: shroomie_glen]
    #14256934 - 04/08/11 02:20 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Anytime I have spare time and aren't in violation of any laws, I fuck with the cops TO THE MAX.
Mostly to waste taxpayers dollars/their time.


--------------------

No. No, man. Shit, no man.  I believe you'd get your ass kicked sayin' somethin' like that man.

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Offlineeris
underground
Male User Gallery

Registered: 11/17/98
Posts: 48,024
Loc: North East, USA
Last seen: 6 months, 15 days
Re: Undercover Cop Prostitute anecdote.... [Re: shroomie_glen]
    #14256940 - 04/08/11 02:21 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

This forum is obsessed with prostitutes tonight.

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Offlineshroomie_glen
RedHotPussyLiquor
Male User Gallery


Registered: 03/01/06
Posts: 4,296
Loc: Narf Carolina Flag
Last seen: 11 years, 4 months
Re: Undercover Cop Prostitute anecdote.... [Re: eris]
    #14256947 - 04/08/11 02:25 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Well this post was in that other thread where I tried SOOOOOOO gotdamned hard to get that asian dude laid, then the other thread about the dude whose girlfriend started hooking got me motivated to turn this into its own full blown, legitimate thread!:smile:


--------------------

No. No, man. Shit, no man.  I believe you'd get your ass kicked sayin' somethin' like that man.

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Offlinelil_demented
Loner will lone
Male User Gallery

Registered: 09/11/06
Posts: 6,146
Last seen: 3 months, 5 days
Re: Undercover Cop Prostitute anecdote.... [Re: eris]
    #14256951 - 04/08/11 02:26 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

eris said:
This forum is obsessed with prostitutes tonight.




It's getting warm out so the hookers are out on the prowl.
There fucking everywhere man... :naughty:
:whacker:

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflinePlutonian
Mushroom Man
Male


Registered: 09/20/09
Posts: 1,153
Last seen: 11 years, 5 months
Re: Undercover Cop Prostitute anecdote.... [Re: eris]
    #14256957 - 04/08/11 02:28 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

speaking of fucking with the cops, I drive a police car, u know the used one that is no longer in the force and sold on auction, ford crown vic police intercepter, it still has the spotlight and I added a push bumper on the front and I bought some "DIAL 911" stickers online to tape it on all sides and also a "Ticket or Click It" sticker on the back, and I also donated $30 in the DMV to get a Emergency license plate lol
Cops have pulled me over numerous time but they got nothing on me.
It's fun to drive and people would be scared of me and slow down and people keep staring at me lol

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Offlineshroomie_glen
RedHotPussyLiquor
Male User Gallery


Registered: 03/01/06
Posts: 4,296
Loc: Narf Carolina Flag
Last seen: 11 years, 4 months
Re: Undercover Cop Prostitute anecdote.... [Re: Plutonian]
    #14256985 - 04/08/11 02:39 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Dude i seriously just :ilold: AND :lolsy: at the same time that is a hairless story.
I mean hilarious.


--------------------

No. No, man. Shit, no man.  I believe you'd get your ass kicked sayin' somethin' like that man.

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Offlineeris
underground
Male User Gallery

Registered: 11/17/98
Posts: 48,024
Loc: North East, USA
Last seen: 6 months, 15 days
Re: Undercover Cop Prostitute anecdote.... [Re: shroomie_glen]
    #14256991 - 04/08/11 02:41 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Hey, I got no probs with it. Just an observation. Drunken hooker fucking, ftw. I could mess with a $30 crack hooker with the proper amount of alcohol. :hehehe: :faded:

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Offlineshroomie_glen
RedHotPussyLiquor
Male User Gallery


Registered: 03/01/06
Posts: 4,296
Loc: Narf Carolina Flag
Last seen: 11 years, 4 months
Re: Undercover Cop Prostitute anecdote.... [Re: eris]
    #14257023 - 04/08/11 02:52 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Yeah, I was REALLLLLLy sober when I fucked with this undercover dame pretending to be a hooker.


--------------------

No. No, man. Shit, no man.  I believe you'd get your ass kicked sayin' somethin' like that man.

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflinePlutonian
Mushroom Man
Male


Registered: 09/20/09
Posts: 1,153
Last seen: 11 years, 5 months
Re: Undercover Cop Prostitute anecdote.... [Re: eris]
    #14257028 - 04/08/11 02:54 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

but did your fellow female classmate cop finally find out you were her classmate in high school?
damn I cant even sleep right now due to my thoughts about having sex for my first time.

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Offlineeris
underground
Male User Gallery

Registered: 11/17/98
Posts: 48,024
Loc: North East, USA
Last seen: 6 months, 15 days
Re: Undercover Cop Prostitute anecdote.... [Re: shroomie_glen]
    #14257029 - 04/08/11 02:54 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

I would have fucked anything that moved when I was 18 or younger. :lmao:

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflinePlutonian
Mushroom Man
Male


Registered: 09/20/09
Posts: 1,153
Last seen: 11 years, 5 months
Re: Undercover Cop Prostitute anecdote.... [Re: eris]
    #14257052 - 04/08/11 03:03 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

eris said:
I would have fucked anything that moved when I was 18 or younger. :lmao:




I was so desperate you have no idea what I used to fuck.
I used to drill hole in cucumber and then put some oil and microwave to warm it a bit and off I go, it feels ok.
Then I fucked balloons, I used 4 balloons and fill them with warm water and place them to form a hole in the center then stick a plastic bag in it and use oil and that feels much better.
Then the most fucked up thing I did was buying a can of spam and took the block of spam out and drill a hole in it and try to wack it away but it just crumbles and messy and I just threw them away, and that was the only fucked up thing I think I ever did in my life.
then I just buy fleshlight, and I 've been thinking about those real doll that you get for like $4000, but too expensive

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisiblecacharstar
Strange is good...
Male

Registered: 11/13/08
Posts: 4,014
Loc: The West Coast
Re: Undercover Cop Prostitute anecdote.... [Re: Plutonian]
    #14257056 - 04/08/11 03:05 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

You all need to go wash yourselves now...  And burn some damm sulfur to rid yourself of those familiar spirits.


--------------------
:irishtoast:

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineBaby_Hitler
Errorist
 User Gallery


Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 03/06/02
Posts: 27,634
Loc: To the limit! Flag
Last seen: 7 hours, 58 minutes
Re: Undercover Cop Prostitute anecdote.... [Re: shroomie_glen]
    #14257064 - 04/08/11 03:09 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

That was good enough that I had to do a Google search to see if it was copypasta'd from somewhere else.

Nice job. :smile2:


--------------------
"America: Fuck yeah!" -- Alexthegreat

“Nothing can now be believed which is seen in a newspaper. Truth itself becomes suspicious by being put into that polluted vehicle. The real extent of this state of misinformation is known only to those who are in situations to confront facts within their knowledge with the lies of the day.”  -- Thomas Jefferson

The greatest sin of mankind is ignorance.

The press takes [Trump] literally, but not seriously; his supporters take him seriously, but not literally. --Salena Zeto (9/23/16)

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Offlineeris
underground
Male User Gallery

Registered: 11/17/98
Posts: 48,024
Loc: North East, USA
Last seen: 6 months, 15 days
Re: Undercover Cop Prostitute anecdote.... [Re: Plutonian]
    #14257069 - 04/08/11 03:14 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Hahahaha, geez.

I remember the rubber glove with lotion and wrapped in tape/stuffed into something technique back when I was like 12, 13.. that's about as extravagant as I've really gone with it.

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflinePlutonian
Mushroom Man
Male


Registered: 09/20/09
Posts: 1,153
Last seen: 11 years, 5 months
Re: Undercover Cop Prostitute anecdote.... [Re: eris]
    #14257076 - 04/08/11 03:18 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

eris said:
Hahahaha, geez.

I remember the rubber glove with lotion and wrapped in tape/stuffed into something technique back when I was like 12, 13.. that's about as extravagant as I've really gone with it.




oh yea I did that too, the latex glove thing with blanket folding.
Most of the time I just hump my folded blanket or my pillow or use hand

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Offlineeris
underground
Male User Gallery

Registered: 11/17/98
Posts: 48,024
Loc: North East, USA
Last seen: 6 months, 15 days
Re: Undercover Cop Prostitute anecdote.... [Re: Plutonian]
    #14257088 - 04/08/11 03:26 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

I love the blatant honesty, not giving a fuck type attitude. :thumbup:

You going to hit the 1000th post yet?

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Offlineeris
underground
Male User Gallery

Registered: 11/17/98
Posts: 48,024
Loc: North East, USA
Last seen: 6 months, 15 days
Re: Undercover Cop Prostitute anecdote.... [Re: Plutonian]
    #14257089 - 04/08/11 03:27 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

There, now I'm about to break the next thousand too! 999, ftw

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflinePlutonian
Mushroom Man
Male


Registered: 09/20/09
Posts: 1,153
Last seen: 11 years, 5 months
Re: Undercover Cop Prostitute anecdote.... [Re: eris]
    #14257092 - 04/08/11 03:30 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

eris said:
There, now I'm about to break the next thousand too! 999, ftw




1000th!
Damn, I didn't notice it until u tell me about it.
ur reaching the thousandth check point too!
gotta go to bed now, too tired

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleSamuel L Jackson
Bad Motherfucker
Male

Registered: 12/10/09
Posts: 8,395
Re: Undercover Cop Prostitute anecdote.... [Re: Plutonian]
    #14257094 - 04/08/11 03:31 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

i think im close to 3000. im checking with this post.

....44 more to go


--------------------


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Jump to top Pages: 1 | 2 | Next >  [ show all ]

Shop: PhytoExtractum Maeng Da Thai Kratom Leaf Powder   Kraken Kratom Red Vein Kratom   Original Sensible Seeds Feminized Cannabis Seeds   Bridgetown Botanicals Bridgetown Botanicals


Similar ThreadsPosterViewsRepliesLast post
* Police Informants and Undercover Cops
( 1 2 3 all )
LayYouIn 5,843 43 01/02/08 09:44 PM
by Gastronomicus
* How do you recognize an undercover cop???
( 1 2 all )
MOTH 8,284 30 09/17/04 11:47 PM
by kadakuda
* Crazy almost crash incedent involing Undercover-popo flowstone 892 3 01/25/05 04:44 PM
by flowstone
* silly cops JonnyOnTheSpot 351 0 02/02/07 09:08 PM
by JonnyOnTheSpot
* Cops know my mobile number
( 1 2 3 4 all )
Jalruza 4,354 74 03/19/08 08:08 AM
by Bridgeburner
* Cop or not a cop? Who knows?
( 1 2 all )
DrEllisDTripper 2,083 32 11/30/06 07:27 PM
by wiggles
* Lost virginity to prostitute yesterday.
( 1 2 3 4 5 all )
monolith4 14,389 98 03/07/05 02:33 PM
by Vvellum
* Cops pose as High School students = drug busts.
( 1 2 all )
40oz 4,627 30 12/10/07 04:53 PM
by TheFakeSunRa

Extra information
You cannot start new topics / You cannot reply to topics
HTML is disabled / BBCode is enabled
Moderator: Entire Staff
6,371 topic views. 4 members, 41 guests and 86 web crawlers are browsing this forum.
[ Show Images Only | Sort by Score | Print Topic ]
Search this thread:

Copyright 1997-2024 Mind Media. Some rights reserved.

Generated in 0.027 seconds spending 0.006 seconds on 13 queries.