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Anonymous #1

Weird question...
    #14217659 - 03/31/11 10:06 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Ive been with this girl for about a month now and sometimes the shit she says makes me question us being together. I mean, we spend mad time together, do fun stuff, do not-so-fun stuff together, weve had sex like almost too much to the point where it might be all about sex, but I dont think it is. I think its just about us being with eachother.

Shes been hurt in the past and she tells me she doesn't want to get hurt. That she doesnt know if she will ever love or trust me because of what happened.

But heres the kicker: she stays asking me if I still want to date. I mean shes asked that question or some variation at least 5 or 6 times and it kinda makes me skeptical. She says she wants to be with me, but she doesnt want me to anxiously wait on her complete love and trust because it might never come.

Im not gonna lie, I do love this girl, I think about her all the time and Im just generally happy with her no matter what, but I dont want to get fucked. I mean she says she wants me, and Im amazing and all that, she texts me off the hook, and if either of us are mad, we just talk it out...but I just dont know what to do at this point...keep it going or continue my seemingly hopeless search for someone who doesn't solely care about the material things in life...


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Offlineskiddy
RockStar
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Registered: 03/25/11
Posts: 366
Last seen: 12 years, 6 months
Re: Weird question... [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #14217794 - 03/31/11 10:33 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

I think she's worried you'll leave her other than that i think your fine especially if your spending mad time fucking alot and she texts you.

I would ask her though why she's asking those questions and ask her the question right back shell never ask it again.


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Anonymous #1

Re: Weird question... [Re: skiddy]
    #14219584 - 04/01/11 08:46 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

That's a really good idea, its just that Im afraid she'll turn shit around. Like if I ask her if she really wants to be with someone like me who has issues (love my booze, weed, and other vices, was kind of a sheltered kid so I really don't have as much as a social life as she does, and I've got some money problems...) she'll probably say those are nothing compared to the fact that its extremely difficult for her to love and trust people.


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OfflineGrok
Has Been a Bad Boy
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Registered: 12/03/03
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Re: Weird question... [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #14219758 - 04/01/11 09:40 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

To me she doesn't sound like she's ready for a full-on relationship. People need to get their baggage sorted out and leave it behind them before they get into new relationships. Insecurity causes all sorts of trouble, I've had to deal with that a lot before. There probably isn't much you can really do to make it better, truthfully -- this has to come from within her.


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OfflineCynosure
allow me to be your guide.
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Registered: 10/06/09
Posts: 4,228
Last seen: 11 months, 12 days
Re: Weird question... [Re: Grok]
    #14220318 - 04/01/11 11:43 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

I agree with Grok.

It has only been a month and it seems to me like she wants the security of one man but is afraid to completely open up to you.  I'd say all you can do at this point is swing away from starting conversations that deal with your "official relationship status".  Just go out and be together.  I'm sure she will eventually open up, but a month doesn't seem like enough time in my opinion.

I wouldn't worry about it until you're in the 3-6 month area.  I feel that should be enough time to be completely comfortable with someone and know where you want to go with things.

Just keep on, man! :thumbup:


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