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 I_was_the_walrus
eggshells
Registered: 05/01/02
Posts: 11,887
Loc: next door
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 Who else here belongs nowhere? 
#14141602 - 03/18/11 04:31 AM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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Lately Ive been having difficulty with this. A few months ago I quit my job, sold all of my things and hit the road. Ive been traveling. Visiting friends, family, camping, random acquaintances, adventures...doing whatever.
Ive realized Im pretty much homeless. Ive got plenty of money and places to go, but nowhere to call home. Nobody waiting for me. Nobody to check in with...
I left home months ago on this adventure to meet new people and see new places, but it seems as soon as I get there, Im leaving. I meet nobody extraordinary, and the places are forgotten as soon as I arrive somewhere else. Then its like...where now? Where am I going? Where are these people and places Ive been looking for? What do I fall back on?
Im out here...and I belong nowhere.
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 desant
Pleiadian Revolutionary
Registered: 03/31/09
Posts: 7,038
Loc: Aether
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
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Your just like me
Quote:
I left my job my boss my car and my home.
I'm leaving for a destination I still don't know.
Somewhere nobody must have duties at all.
And if you like this you can follow me so let's go,
Follow me,
And let's go,
To a place where belong and leave our troubles at home come with me,
We can go... to a paradise of love and joy a Destination Unknown.
--------------------
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Poid
Shroomery's #1 Spellir
Registered: 02/04/08
Posts: 40,372
Loc: SF Bay Area 
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Quote:
I_was_the_walrus said:
Lately Ive been having difficulty with this. A few months ago I quit my job, sold all of my things and hit the road. Ive been traveling. Visiting friends, family, camping, random acquaintances, adventures...doing whatever.
Ive realized Im pretty much homeless. Ive got plenty of money and places to go, but nowhere to call home. Nobody waiting for me. Nobody to check in with...
I left home months ago on this adventure to meet new people and see new places, but it seems as soon as I get there, Im leaving. I meet nobody extraordinary, and the places are forgotten as soon as I arrive somewhere else. Then its like...where now? Where am I going? Where are these people and places Ive been looking for? What do I fall back on?
Im out here...and I belong nowhere.
Holy fuck, dude, I was just thinking about something like this earlier tonight...
What do I fall back on?
Do you feel like everybody besides you has something/someone to fall back on?
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Well I try my best to be just like I am, but everybody wants you to be just like them. -- Bob Dylan   fireworks_god said:It's one thing to simply enjoy a style of life that one enjoys, but it's another thing altogether to refer to another person's choice as "wrong" or to rationalize their behavior as being pathological or resulting from some sort of inadequacy or failing so as to create a sense of superiority or separation as yet another projection of a personal fear or control issue.
Edited by Poid (03/18/11 04:51 AM)
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Charliem
Registered: 08/27/10
Posts: 481
Last seen: 11 years, 10 months
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: Poid]
#14141636 - 03/18/11 04:56 AM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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Ultimately we're all alone in this world. Home is wherever you make it.
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Gomp
¡(Bound to·(O))be free!
Registered: 09/11/04
Posts: 10,888
Loc: I re·side [primarily] in...
Last seen: 1 year, 1 month
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 Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: Charliem] 1
#14141644 - 03/18/11 04:59 AM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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We are always now and we are always here..
We are no·w·here..
(Where we are; is now & here!)
:p
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Poid
Shroomery's #1 Spellir
Registered: 02/04/08
Posts: 40,372
Loc: SF Bay Area
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: Charliem]
#14141649 - 03/18/11 05:00 AM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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Homeless people naked? 
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Well I try my best to be just like I am, but everybody wants you to be just like them. -- Bob Dylanfireworks_god said:It's one thing to simply enjoy a style of life that one enjoys, but it's another thing altogether to refer to another person's choice as "wrong" or to rationalize their behavior as being pathological or resulting from some sort of inadequacy or failing so as to create a sense of superiority or separation as yet another projection of a personal fear or control issue.
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nice1
Not the droid your looking for
Registered: 09/26/09
Posts: 10,449
Loc: earth
Last seen: 11 years, 3 months
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Death greets me warm.
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Lanc3r117
Rain
Registered: 10/10/08
Posts: 286
Loc: PNW
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: nice1]
#14141701 - 03/18/11 05:34 AM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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It is nice to be needed..
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Poid
Shroomery's #1 Spellir
Registered: 02/04/08
Posts: 40,372
Loc: SF Bay Area
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: Lanc3r117]
#14141708 - 03/18/11 05:37 AM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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It's nice to know where you belong, and who you belong with.
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Well I try my best to be just like I am, but everybody wants you to be just like them. -- Bob Dylanfireworks_god said:It's one thing to simply enjoy a style of life that one enjoys, but it's another thing altogether to refer to another person's choice as "wrong" or to rationalize their behavior as being pathological or resulting from some sort of inadequacy or failing so as to create a sense of superiority or separation as yet another projection of a personal fear or control issue.
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Mello Kitty
Beautiful Burnout
Registered: 12/04/08
Posts: 8,556
Loc: Sanriotown, Harmonyland
Last seen: 7 years, 8 months
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i belong nowhere and i never have
i am nothing
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donteatasians
Registered: 08/14/07
Posts: 1,461
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Quote:
I_was_the_walrus said:
Lately Ive been having difficulty with this. A few months ago I quit my job, sold all of my things and hit the road. Ive been traveling. Visiting friends, family, camping, random acquaintances, adventures...doing whatever.
Ive realized Im pretty much homeless. Ive got plenty of money and places to go, but nowhere to call home. Nobody waiting for me. Nobody to check in with...
I left home months ago on this adventure to meet new people and see new places, but it seems as soon as I get there, Im leaving. I meet nobody extraordinary, and the places are forgotten as soon as I arrive somewhere else. Then its like...where now? Where am I going? Where are these people and places Ive been looking for? What do I fall back on?
Im out here...and I belong nowhere.
Sounds to me that your figuring out that it really doesn't matter where you are. I went through a similar thing, gave away a lot and quit my job. In my opinion personal development determines what we make of a situation. Sooo….. You belong everywhere and where ever the fuck you feel like being.  There is alot out there but none of it matters more than the rest.
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gerryjarcia
biophiliac
Registered: 05/29/10
Posts: 1,889
Loc: the woods
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Quote:
I_was_the_walrus said:
Lately Ive been having difficulty with this. A few months ago I quit my job, sold all of my things and hit the road. Ive been traveling. Visiting friends, family, camping, random acquaintances, adventures...doing whatever.
Ive realized Im pretty much homeless. Ive got plenty of money and places to go, but nowhere to call home. Nobody waiting for me. Nobody to check in with...
I left home months ago on this adventure to meet new people and see new places, but it seems as soon as I get there, Im leaving. I meet nobody extraordinary, and the places are forgotten as soon as I arrive somewhere else. Then its like...where now? Where am I going? Where are these people and places Ive been looking for? What do I fall back on?
Im out here...and I belong nowhere.
yeah, felt this way most of my life. been a nomad for many years. i've been working on learning how to "be" fully wherever i am at the moment.
the "where to next?" thought process is a habit your mind gets into. it almost becomes like an addiction. for me it's a constant search for novelty and community. it's all a part of growing up as a total idealist.
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"We are all intoxicated. We were born into an insane asylum, a world crazy-making. We believe what we see and hear. The real myth is the myth of sanity, of rationality: it's a disease that is eating away at the earth. All the poisons flow from our denial. We deny madness, we forget our crimes, we dismember the corpse, we imprison our children. We need poison to poison the poison, to remember the sacred nature of intoxication, the green body of the young god." ~ Dale Pendell
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akira_akuma
Φύσις κρύπτεσθαι ὕψιστος φιλεῖ
Registered: 08/28/09
Posts: 82,455
Loc: Onypeirophóros
Last seen: 4 years, 3 months
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: Mello Kitty]
#14142026 - 03/18/11 08:09 AM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
ellenallien said:
i belong nowhere and i never have
i am nothing
and what stems from nothing?
everything...
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JesusGoneRogue
Registered: 10/24/10
Posts: 9,495
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: akira_akuma]
#14142094 - 03/18/11 08:29 AM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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i may not belong anywhere, but i know that someone belongs in my arms. 
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Jockin John C
Trip Trappen
Registered: 07/31/09
Posts: 1,091
Loc: outsideinsideout
Last seen: 4 years, 11 months
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Take yourself from nowhere to now here 
and home is where the heart is.
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trekie
Metal man
Registered: 05/11/09
Posts: 11,085
Loc: Larger cities
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: Mello Kitty]
#14142119 - 03/18/11 08:38 AM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
ellenallien said:
i belong nowhere and i never have
i am nothing
coming from someone who lives with there parents 
Its a scarey feeling at first but then i realized thats just freedom talking.
Yep you may be alone in the world but that also means you answer to no one .
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I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.
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akira_akuma
Φύσις κρύπτεσθαι ὕψιστος φιλεῖ
Registered: 08/28/09
Posts: 82,455
Loc: Onypeirophóros
Last seen: 4 years, 3 months
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Quote:
JesusGoneRogue said:
i may not belong anywhere, but i know that someone belongs in my arms.
that could be... like, a song.
i maayyy not belooong anyyyy wheerrreee... but i knoooww that soommee one beeelongs in myyyy arrrrmss... 
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I_was_the_walrus
eggshells
Registered: 05/01/02
Posts: 11,887
Loc: next door
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Quote:
Sooo….. You belong everywhere and where ever the fuck you feel like being. There is alot out there but none of it matters more than the rest.
I guess this is what Im coming to terms with. I feel like Im waiting for something. Looking for something maybe? But what? Where?
A lot of it hit me hard last night. I drove back to my home town about 500 miles to grab some things from a friend to take with me. I ended up at the bar where I used to work. Everybody was happy to see me again...made me happy. But anytime somebody asked "So where are you living", I was just like I dont know...nowhere really. So in a few days Im off to florida for awhile, where I know nobody at all. No friends or family. Ill be wwoofing on a farm. So then what? Whats down there? What am I gonna do after that?
I honestly feel like Im completing my bucket list. After a recent breakup Ive decided to throw all caution to the wind. Do what I want, when I want and where I want.. See all the places Ive always wanted to see and pass out drunk on every beach. Just live life and dont think twice. I think that may be the problem though. After this bucket list, I have no plan. So then what? Im not dieing...when all is said and done, where do I go from there? What do I do when Im broke and tired and just want to go home? Where is home?
Edited by I_was_the_walrus (03/18/11 03:39 PM)
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JesusGoneRogue
Registered: 10/24/10
Posts: 9,495
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: akira_akuma]
#14143771 - 03/18/11 03:22 PM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
akira_akuma said:
Quote:
JesusGoneRogue said:
i may not belong anywhere, but i know that someone belongs in my arms.
that could be... like, a song.
i maayyy not belooong anyyyy wheerrreee... but i knoooww that soommee one beeelongs in myyyy arrrrmss...
they love me. they really love me. 
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Ralafe
Whistling Pot
Registered: 09/13/10
Posts: 143
Last seen: 5 years, 6 months
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Feels to me like your journey is about finding the answer to your question. I say let the world turn and see where it takes you. I'd love to be in your shoes right now.
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Poid
Shroomery's #1 Spellir
Registered: 02/04/08
Posts: 40,372
Loc: SF Bay Area
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: Mello Kitty]
#14144686 - 03/18/11 06:26 PM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
ellenallien said:
i belong nowhere and i never have
i am nothing
--------------------
Well I try my best to be just like I am, but everybody wants you to be just like them. -- Bob Dylanfireworks_god said:It's one thing to simply enjoy a style of life that one enjoys, but it's another thing altogether to refer to another person's choice as "wrong" or to rationalize their behavior as being pathological or resulting from some sort of inadequacy or failing so as to create a sense of superiority or separation as yet another projection of a personal fear or control issue.
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Envix
Avoidant Disorder
Registered: 11/04/08
Posts: 18,206
Last seen: 1 year, 17 days
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: Poid]
#14144695 - 03/18/11 06:27 PM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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why do we feel the need for other people to validate our existence
no one is living your life but your self
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smack a hoe out this dimension
continue my ascension
-bhad bhabie
rip. todcasil, acid sloth, st1llnox, zappaisgod, big worm (sketch), tim b
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Poid
Shroomery's #1 Spellir
Registered: 02/04/08
Posts: 40,372
Loc: SF Bay Area
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: Envix]
#14144777 - 03/18/11 06:40 PM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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Because we're social creatures and we're programmed that way.
I know, it sucks ass. 
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Well I try my best to be just like I am, but everybody wants you to be just like them. -- Bob Dylanfireworks_god said:It's one thing to simply enjoy a style of life that one enjoys, but it's another thing altogether to refer to another person's choice as "wrong" or to rationalize their behavior as being pathological or resulting from some sort of inadequacy or failing so as to create a sense of superiority or separation as yet another projection of a personal fear or control issue.
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I_was_the_walrus
eggshells
Registered: 05/01/02
Posts: 11,887
Loc: next door
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: Poid]
#14144878 - 03/18/11 06:59 PM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Poid said:
Because we're social creatures and we're programmed that way.
I know, it sucks ass.
Yeah pretty much. That, and a recent break up. I went from living with a "soul mate" for 5 years, dog, and a 9-5 job....to single, sleeping alone, waking up alone, quit my job, sold all my shit and moved to places where I know pretty much nobody. Its just a drastic lifestyle change. I feel like I need to do it though. I fucking have to do this. I need to learn to be happy by myself, being completely independent. Im just having a hard time adjusting.
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Poid
Shroomery's #1 Spellir
Registered: 02/04/08
Posts: 40,372
Loc: SF Bay Area
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How old are you?
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Well I try my best to be just like I am, but everybody wants you to be just like them. -- Bob Dylanfireworks_god said:It's one thing to simply enjoy a style of life that one enjoys, but it's another thing altogether to refer to another person's choice as "wrong" or to rationalize their behavior as being pathological or resulting from some sort of inadequacy or failing so as to create a sense of superiority or separation as yet another projection of a personal fear or control issue.
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I_was_the_walrus
eggshells
Registered: 05/01/02
Posts: 11,887
Loc: next door
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: Poid]
#14145204 - 03/18/11 07:57 PM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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Only 26. I left home before 18. Lived with room mates. Partied, played in bands..that kinda shit. Met a girl at 21 and ended up in a 5 year relationship. Ive always lived with somebody, or had somebody to fall back on/help me out in tight situations. Ive never been out there all alone before. Nothing but a tent, a sleeping bag and some clothes. Guess its time to learn...
Leaving vegas for a florida farm on monday..
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Poid
Shroomery's #1 Spellir
Registered: 02/04/08
Posts: 40,372
Loc: SF Bay Area
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Quote:
I_was_the_walrus said:
Ive never been out there all alone before. Nothing but a tent, a sleeping bag and some clothes. Guess its time to learn...
I did this when I was like 19 (I'm 22 now), it was pretty fun.
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Well I try my best to be just like I am, but everybody wants you to be just like them. -- Bob Dylanfireworks_god said:It's one thing to simply enjoy a style of life that one enjoys, but it's another thing altogether to refer to another person's choice as "wrong" or to rationalize their behavior as being pathological or resulting from some sort of inadequacy or failing so as to create a sense of superiority or separation as yet another projection of a personal fear or control issue.
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Envix
Avoidant Disorder
Registered: 11/04/08
Posts: 18,206
Last seen: 1 year, 17 days
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: Poid]
#14145243 - 03/18/11 08:04 PM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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ive been alone my whole life
fuckin sucks man 
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smack a hoe out this dimension
continue my ascension
-bhad bhabie
rip. todcasil, acid sloth, st1llnox, zappaisgod, big worm (sketch), tim b
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Poid
Shroomery's #1 Spellir
Registered: 02/04/08
Posts: 40,372
Loc: SF Bay Area
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: Envix]
#14145253 - 03/18/11 08:06 PM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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Foster children, LOL
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Well I try my best to be just like I am, but everybody wants you to be just like them. -- Bob Dylanfireworks_god said:It's one thing to simply enjoy a style of life that one enjoys, but it's another thing altogether to refer to another person's choice as "wrong" or to rationalize their behavior as being pathological or resulting from some sort of inadequacy or failing so as to create a sense of superiority or separation as yet another projection of a personal fear or control issue.
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Envix
Avoidant Disorder
Registered: 11/04/08
Posts: 18,206
Last seen: 1 year, 17 days
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: Poid]
#14145301 - 03/18/11 08:14 PM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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i have a bunch of half-siblings but i never see them
and my mom i see from time to time but we dont really have a lot to talk about because we've never lived together
my dad is cool but we have a weird relationship too i haven't seen him in years. i used to visit him on weekends as a kid but stopped going when i was a teenager so i could attempt gaining a social life.. which failed miserably
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smack a hoe out this dimension
continue my ascension
-bhad bhabie
rip. todcasil, acid sloth, st1llnox, zappaisgod, big worm (sketch), tim b
Edited by Envix (03/18/11 08:16 PM)
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pfxtc
RUEXP?
Registered: 11/15/08
Posts: 21,166
Loc:
Last seen: 8 years, 7 months
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: Envix]
#14145306 - 03/18/11 08:15 PM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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well envix sounds like suicides all that's left
can i have your stuff?
--------------------
koods said:
Young male going by the name "Bassfreak" entered Worcester General complaining of a sharp pain in his buttock region after attending EDM event. Attending physician considered a possible diagnosis of acute rave anus, but upon further investigation it was determined there was nothing cute about patient's anus.
Life-long trip report
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tito123
Registered: 01/23/10
Posts: 3,006
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Quote:
I_was_the_walrus said:
Only 26. I left home before 18. Lived with room mates. Partied, played in bands..that kinda shit. Met a girl at 21 and ended up in a 5 year relationship. Ive always lived with somebody, or had somebody to fall back on/help me out in tight situations. Ive never been out there all alone before. Nothing but a tent, a sleeping bag and some clothes. Guess its time to learn...
Leaving vegas for a florida farm on monday..
dont forget about the shroomery
i enjoy reading your posts
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Poid
Shroomery's #1 Spellir
Registered: 02/04/08
Posts: 40,372
Loc: SF Bay Area
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: Envix]
#14146643 - 03/19/11 12:44 AM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Envix said:
i have a bunch of half-siblings but i never see them
and my mom i see from time to time but we dont really have a lot to talk about because we've never lived together
my dad is cool but we have a weird relationship too i haven't seen him in years. i used to visit him on weekends as a kid but stopped going when i was a teenager so i could attempt gaining a social life.. which failed miserably
I'm sorry to hear that, hope shit works out for ya.
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Well I try my best to be just like I am, but everybody wants you to be just like them. -- Bob Dylanfireworks_god said:It's one thing to simply enjoy a style of life that one enjoys, but it's another thing altogether to refer to another person's choice as "wrong" or to rationalize their behavior as being pathological or resulting from some sort of inadequacy or failing so as to create a sense of superiority or separation as yet another projection of a personal fear or control issue.
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1tokeovrtheline
life=painfully beautiful
Registered: 04/12/10
Posts: 866
Loc: innerverse&universe, surrealis...
Last seen: 2 years, 6 months
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: Poid]
#14146675 - 03/19/11 12:55 AM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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damn respect dude, I've felt like doing that, but don't have the money and am just too stressed and concerned over the pressure to finish college, have an apartment, have a job, etc. Goddammit I hate societal pressures
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Music, business as usual
Mi' spliff and Guiness as usual
Highgrade we puffin as usual
Fight down the system as usual
The system fight we down as usual
The cops dem a watch we as usual
And a we a watch the cops as usual
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Poid
Shroomery's #1 Spellir
Registered: 02/04/08
Posts: 40,372
Loc: SF Bay Area
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Quote:
1tokeovrtheline said:
Goddammit I hate societal pressures
Me too, that's why I'm glad to be at peace in my own free apartment, which I'll have for life BTW. 
--------------------
Well I try my best to be just like I am, but everybody wants you to be just like them. -- Bob Dylanfireworks_god said:It's one thing to simply enjoy a style of life that one enjoys, but it's another thing altogether to refer to another person's choice as "wrong" or to rationalize their behavior as being pathological or resulting from some sort of inadequacy or failing so as to create a sense of superiority or separation as yet another projection of a personal fear or control issue.
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Internetvirus
Registered: 10/26/08
Posts: 982
Loc: *#!!#*
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California will always be waiting for you all. Well not always. And not all.
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Poid
Shroomery's #1 Spellir
Registered: 02/04/08
Posts: 40,372
Loc: SF Bay Area
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God I love this state, I'm so glad to live here and not some shitty-ass state like Montana or something.
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Well I try my best to be just like I am, but everybody wants you to be just like them. -- Bob Dylanfireworks_god said:It's one thing to simply enjoy a style of life that one enjoys, but it's another thing altogether to refer to another person's choice as "wrong" or to rationalize their behavior as being pathological or resulting from some sort of inadequacy or failing so as to create a sense of superiority or separation as yet another projection of a personal fear or control issue.
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Internetvirus
Registered: 10/26/08
Posts: 982
Loc: *#!!#*
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: Poid]
#14146776 - 03/19/11 01:32 AM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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Poid
Shroomery's #1 Spellir
Registered: 02/04/08
Posts: 40,372
Loc: SF Bay Area
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--------------------
Well I try my best to be just like I am, but everybody wants you to be just like them. -- Bob Dylanfireworks_god said:It's one thing to simply enjoy a style of life that one enjoys, but it's another thing altogether to refer to another person's choice as "wrong" or to rationalize their behavior as being pathological or resulting from some sort of inadequacy or failing so as to create a sense of superiority or separation as yet another projection of a personal fear or control issue.
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just a rose
Stranger
Registered: 12/28/10
Posts: 34
Last seen: 10 years, 1 month
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: Poid]
#14147060 - 03/19/11 03:19 AM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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I envy your freedom.
Sometimes having too many ties can be incredibly suffocating... Knowing that you have so many people that you are in one way or another responsible for. After a while, you stop living for yourself and start living to meet their expectations. I feel lost too, but in a different way. I wish I could leave everything behind to discover what it is that I really want/need.
--------------------
"Afterwards, the compromise. Bodies resume their boundaries. These legs, for instance, mine. Your arms take you back in. Spoons of our fingers, lips admit their ownership. The bedding yawns, a door blows aimlessly ajar and overhead, a plane singsongs coming down. Nothing is changed, except there was a moment when the wolf, the mongering wolf who stands outside the self lay lightly down, and slept." -Maxine Kumin
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Poid
Shroomery's #1 Spellir
Registered: 02/04/08
Posts: 40,372
Loc: SF Bay Area
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: just a rose]
#14147070 - 03/19/11 03:22 AM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
just a rose said:
I envy your freedom.
I would, too (if I were you). 
Quote:
just a rose said:
Sometimes having too many ties can be incredibly suffocating... Knowing that you have so many people that you are in one way or another responsible for. After a while, you stop living for yourself and start living to meet their expectations.
Pretty much the only people who matter to me these days are my immediate family members; anyone else who wants me to do something for them can kiss my ass. 
Quote:
just a rose said:
I feel lost too, but in a different way. I wish I could leave everything behind to discover what it is that I really want/need.
How old are you?
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Well I try my best to be just like I am, but everybody wants you to be just like them. -- Bob Dylanfireworks_god said:It's one thing to simply enjoy a style of life that one enjoys, but it's another thing altogether to refer to another person's choice as "wrong" or to rationalize their behavior as being pathological or resulting from some sort of inadequacy or failing so as to create a sense of superiority or separation as yet another projection of a personal fear or control issue.
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just a rose
Stranger
Registered: 12/28/10
Posts: 34
Last seen: 10 years, 1 month
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: Poid]
#14147082 - 03/19/11 03:32 AM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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I'm 23, recently graduated college and I feel like my life is already planned and to deviate from the path I am on will crush my parents. They gave up so much for me to succeed and to have what they didn't have and now I feel obligated to live the life they expect of me. They want me to pursue a professional career, marry, have 2.5 children, the white picket fence, and all the trappings of surburban life.
They are very strict asian parents LOL
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"Afterwards, the compromise. Bodies resume their boundaries. These legs, for instance, mine. Your arms take you back in. Spoons of our fingers, lips admit their ownership. The bedding yawns, a door blows aimlessly ajar and overhead, a plane singsongs coming down. Nothing is changed, except there was a moment when the wolf, the mongering wolf who stands outside the self lay lightly down, and slept." -Maxine Kumin
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Poid
Shroomery's #1 Spellir
Registered: 02/04/08
Posts: 40,372
Loc: SF Bay Area
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: just a rose]
#14147113 - 03/19/11 03:52 AM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
just a rose said:
I'm 23, recently graduated college and I feel like my life is already planned and to deviate from the path I am on will crush my parents.
Congrats on that, man! 
I'm in community college right now but am going to drop out after this quarter; I've realized that schools isn't for me, I don't feel like devoting my life to it because the purpose of going to school is to make money, and at this point in my life money is all but important to me; definitely not worth devoting my life to.
Quote:
just a rose said:
They gave up so much for me to succeed and to have what they didn't have and now I feel obligated to live the life they expect of me.
I just got off the phone with my mother, and she was talking about how she gave everything to me so that I may "make something of my life"; she was also talking about how she came from a basically dirt-poor family and had no support whatsoever, and that me, who had everything as a child, should definitely seize the opportunity to attain true success. I just told her that the ordinary 9-5 lifestyle is not compatible with my desires, so I'm not interested in pursuing it.
Quote:
just a rose said:
They want me to pursue a professional career, marry, have 2.5 children, the white picket fence, and all the trappings of surburban life.
My mom was talking about wishing she had grandchildren; I told her that I'm not interested in having kids because I don't feel like I would be a fit parent (for many reasons), and that I don't want to bring a life into this world unless I am fully able to make sure s/he has the best life possible.
Quote:
just a rose said:
They are very strict asian parents LOL
Yeah, Asians are totally about society and conformism, that's what I don't really like about their culture. I dunno, man, you just have to let them know that you love them, and that you need to do what is best for you.
Shit will work out, man, it usually does IME. 
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Well I try my best to be just like I am, but everybody wants you to be just like them. -- Bob Dylanfireworks_god said:It's one thing to simply enjoy a style of life that one enjoys, but it's another thing altogether to refer to another person's choice as "wrong" or to rationalize their behavior as being pathological or resulting from some sort of inadequacy or failing so as to create a sense of superiority or separation as yet another projection of a personal fear or control issue.
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1tokeovrtheline
life=painfully beautiful
Registered: 04/12/10
Posts: 866
Loc: innerverse&universe, surrealis...
Last seen: 2 years, 6 months
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Re: Who else here belongs nowhere? [Re: Poid]
#14148351 - 03/19/11 01:15 PM (13 years, 1 month ago) |
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One day after a strong trip I remember just waking up and sitting there in bed like "wtf do I do now, where do I go from here" I just couldn't figure out what I wanted to do, so I just skipped school and thought about it/researched it all day and came up with a plan-
Now I'm working on my cultural anthropology degree, after college I plan to go into the peace corps for a while, then graduate school and most likely I will either
A)get lucky and get to travel around researching other cultures, most likely to help develop social services and guide political actions like tribal relations type things
B) start at a lower level museum position, handling artifacts, setting up displays explaining cultures, etc (which just makes me fuckin drool)
C)becoming a professor getting to teach others about cultures and our misconceptions and ethnocentrism, probably continuing research or working on books, getting grants to go off and study a culture or something, which I would love personally
-I mean seriously within the past year three professors admitted to me that they grew weed or shrooms, and one even hinted he made acid (without me asking or anything-like my history teacher just told me marijuana legalization would be a good paper topic without me even asking), yet nobody gives a fuck because they are professors and respected members of the community. professors don't work that fuckin hard for the amount of purpose, job security/job market, salary, etc and they are given more freedom than pretty much anyone without huge amounts of money (and often are still given more freedom than even the richest celebrity)
At worst I'll end up never making it to graduate school and getting an applied anthropology job, which all pay pretty well and have a good, stable job market
basically I just consider it a way to fulfill all those pressures people put on you, and still give society the finger-and be respected for it. its an escape within the societal expectations that allows you to actually be in a position to help change things and not get ostracized for it.
Its having your cake and eating it too 
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Music, business as usual
Mi' spliff and Guiness as usual
Highgrade we puffin as usual
Fight down the system as usual
The system fight we down as usual
The cops dem a watch we as usual
And a we a watch the cops as usual
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1tokeovrtheline
life=painfully beautiful
Registered: 04/12/10
Posts: 866
Loc: innerverse&universe, surrealis...
Last seen: 2 years, 6 months
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oh not to mention that an area of cultural anthropology is
TRANSPERSONAL [cultural] ANTHROPOLOGY
which is the study of altered states of consciousness in culture-its a rare field and chances are I'd never get into it, but if I was lucky enough, I could be dropping acid legally and travelling around the world to do ayahuasca and stuff, then go home and tell my family and friends and anyone I damn well please about it and they'll just be proud and respectful of my important work 
not that its likely at all, but really I just see no negatives with this career path
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Music, business as usual
Mi' spliff and Guiness as usual
Highgrade we puffin as usual
Fight down the system as usual
The system fight we down as usual
The cops dem a watch we as usual
And a we a watch the cops as usual
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thoughts
imagining.
Registered: 10/06/07
Posts: 16,816
Loc: here.
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Quote:
I_was_the_walrus said:
Lately Ive been having difficulty with this. A few months ago I quit my job, sold all of my things and hit the road. Ive been traveling. Visiting friends, family, camping, random acquaintances, adventures...doing whatever.
Ive realized Im pretty much homeless. Ive got plenty of money and places to go, but nowhere to call home. Nobody waiting for me. Nobody to check in with...
I left home months ago on this adventure to meet new people and see new places, but it seems as soon as I get there, Im leaving. I meet nobody extraordinary, and the places are forgotten as soon as I arrive somewhere else. Then its like...where now? Where am I going? Where are these people and places Ive been looking for? What do I fall back on?
Im out here...and I belong nowhere.
Get yourself a cool ass dog.
And don't worry so much about the future,
let life/nature do it's thang.
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I need Jesus.
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