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Offlinekoods
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Registered: 05/26/11
Posts: 106,073
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: vandago]
    #22614190 - 12/04/15 06:36 PM (8 years, 1 month ago)

"is this 911?"


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NotSheekle said
“if I believed she was 16 I would become unattracted to her”


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OfflinePoll Na gColm
Overlord


Registered: 11/24/15
Posts: 53
Last seen: 7 years, 11 months
Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: koods]
    #22687804 - 12/22/15 06:41 PM (8 years, 1 month ago)

I'm most definitely a n00b compared to some most of the shit I've been reading on this thread.

The dirtiest shit I've done is having sex with a girl on her period. Had a girlfriend who was keen for it and never let a bit of blood get in the way, it wasn't kinky for either of us, just seemed like neither of us ever really cared about it.

ANYWAY, this one time on her period she said she was a bit dry and told me to spit and slobber all up and down her thang so we could get down to business. I had no problem with that, a good source of iron. Usually we had long sex sessions, and during that same session at some point she must have run dry again because I felt an awful pain at the end of Long Dong Silver. I pulled him out and there was a lot of blood, no surprise. But he was sore and when I cleaned him up I could see why I was in pain....I tore the banjo string!!!!!!!!
I couldn't have sex or masturbate for about 3 months afterwards as it would keep bleeding.

I don't know what the moral of the story is, but I always keep a sachet of lube in the wallet handy nowadays


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Invisiblevandago
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Registered: 07/07/04
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Poll Na gColm]
    #22687851 - 12/22/15 06:53 PM (8 years, 1 month ago)

.


Edited by vandago (07/11/22 06:22 AM)


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OfflineConnoisseur

Registered: 05/13/11
Posts: 34,686
Last seen: 5 years, 2 months
Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: vandago]
    #22687880 - 12/22/15 06:58 PM (8 years, 1 month ago)

Fingered my girls ass and pussy when she was on her period


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Anonymous #66

Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Connoisseur]
    #22688221 - 12/22/15 08:32 PM (8 years, 1 month ago)

Farted into a girl's pussy then ate her out. Now every time I smell a fart I get a raging boner.


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OfflineBothHands
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Registered: 10/28/09
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Anonymous #66] * 3
    #22758399 - 01/09/16 06:10 PM (8 years, 22 days ago)

I recently had the best sexual experience of my life.  I met the guy at a psytrance party in South Africa, and within 2 hours I was on the mattress he had in his tent.  The cum in my hair turned into dreadlocks after 3 days.  I went through a whole bottle of conditioner trying to get the dreads out.  :lol:  He was able to make his tongue vibrate to the sound of the music in the background and it was the most cosmic head I've ever had. 

I don't know, there was just something awesome about random casual sex with a super super sexy stranger on the floor in a tent with a bunch of people around, his friends around a campfire talking and passing bowls.  I was tripping so fucking hard I thought my family were talking about my behavior outside the tent, but I didn't care! lol.  (My family was not at this event, and my parents were still in the USA, but I heard them anyway :lol:)

I'm not super freaky, but that was a high point.  I was staying at my grandma's Bed and Breakfast in SA (she lives downstairs and has family guest rooms, and then the actual guests stay upstairs.  Well, this one guest was a geopolitical science professor with a doctorate, British accent, and liked to do mushrooms in the woods.  I wound up spending a night in his room instead of mine.  I'm sure my grandma knew what was up.  I guess exhibitionism is my style of freaky.


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Put America to sleep with warm milk and clichés.


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OfflineConnoisseur

Registered: 05/13/11
Posts: 34,686
Last seen: 5 years, 2 months
Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: BothHands] * 1
    #22758421 - 01/09/16 06:16 PM (8 years, 22 days ago)

Wow BH long time no see! a hell of a post right there lol


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OfflineBothHands
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Registered: 10/28/09
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Connoisseur]
    #22758437 - 01/09/16 06:21 PM (8 years, 22 days ago)

Thank you hehe

Yeah I've been gone for quite some time now.  Was feeling nostalgic, so I put on some recordings of Vortex in SA, and I ran out of things to do while listening to it.  (Was tired of jumping up and down in my room), so I decided to stop by here.


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Put America to sleep with warm milk and clichés.


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OfflineConnoisseur

Registered: 05/13/11
Posts: 34,686
Last seen: 5 years, 2 months
Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: BothHands]
    #22758464 - 01/09/16 06:28 PM (8 years, 22 days ago)

Everything been well on your end?

I've been clean off opiates for over a year myself actually, just a hiatus though


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OfflineBothHands
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Connoisseur]
    #22758515 - 01/09/16 06:40 PM (8 years, 22 days ago)

I take 2mg suboxone, but aside from that, I've been clean for about 2 years now.  Well, I mean, I've had about 4 nods in those 2 years where I come off subs for a special occasion, but I don't really count that.  It's not the addict behavior I was having before where I dropped out of uni, got a minimum wage job, and just used entire paychecks on dillys.  Things have been somewhat insane, when I came back from SA, I was homeless for 3 months and still trying to take classes.  Not like, sleeping under a bridge homeless, but couch-surfing/hotel-surfing, I guess.  Then the girl who was my best friend at the time and I were going to move in together, but she wanted her boyfriend to come too, so we got a 3 bedroom.  He was paying her part of the rent anyway.  Well, she started getting out of control, and one night she punched herself in the face a bunch of times and asked me to lie to the cops about it so he would be arrested.  I said f that, and she called me heartless and grabbed my hair.  I eventually beat her ass, but she bit me pretty bad and I have a scar lol.  Also claw marks on my arms.  I'm living with her now ex-boyfriend, who has turned out to be really awesome.  He's in his early 30's, and it's so nice to live with someone who's kinda grown up already.  I don't need that kid shit anymore, it's just too dramatic for me.  He also goes to FAU, and has the exact same birthday as me (month and day, I'm a about 7 years younger).  We decided not the get physical though because the house is in my name only and I can't afford to not have his half of the rent, so why rock the boat?  He's way cool though, journalism major, has already had an employer fly him to peru, and he's doing this ghostwriting gig right now that's paying well.  Also in a punk band, sounds kind of like the Casualties, but with much better lyrics (if you could hear them haha).  Not really my scene, but it's still fun to go to his shows and do shots. :awesome:


--------------------
Put America to sleep with warm milk and clichés.


Edited by BothHands (01/09/16 06:42 PM)


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InvisibleDistorted Vision
The best. Of the worst.
Male


Registered: 07/30/09
Posts: 4,292
Loc: Indiana Flag
Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: BothHands]
    #22758533 - 01/09/16 06:43 PM (8 years, 22 days ago)

Cosmic head... Love it! :awedance:


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"Yo yo just here to spread my clit and show ya'll what a wonderful and free being we are all inside lets take the acid and turn inside into the outside come on over baby lets smell the roses ohh ohh come on we're about to get lit show my undies to your baby I'll hug it down three times go around frown come on we aint a nice clown kiss me upside down down down come on sorry if you cant handle my wokeness come on lets take her panties off write shroomery on my asshole and taste it lick it make if feel like we was 1978 come on baby lets do the locamotion"-Twig dude


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OfflineConnoisseur

Registered: 05/13/11
Posts: 34,686
Last seen: 5 years, 2 months
Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: BothHands]
    #22758537 - 01/09/16 06:44 PM (8 years, 22 days ago)

Not bad! I bet getting off buses gonna be a bitch though as I'm sure you already well know

I kicked my 10-20 bag a day habit cold turkey in a psych unit October 1 2014

It was a nightmare to say the least

So since you mentioned booze are you only sober from opiates?


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OfflineBothHands
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Distorted Vision]
    #22758586 - 01/09/16 06:52 PM (8 years, 22 days ago)

Quote:

Distorted Vision said:
Cosmic head... Love it! :awedance:




:aweoverdose:


Wait, what about buses?  I have a car so I don't take the bus.  I did spend some nights sleeping in the car too.  It sucked. 

Yeah, only off opiates, and only if you don't count suboxone.  But I have it very under control.  I take maybe .25mg klonopin/day, or sometimes 5mg temazepam instead.  Trying to keep the dose low, cuse detoxing off bars is even worse than opiates x_x  I haven't had to go a day without weed though, luckily, as my roommate likes to buy quarter ounces, and is very generous about sharing. 

psyches and mdma are still in, but only at a trance or jam festie, which I don't do very often.


--------------------
Put America to sleep with warm milk and clichés.


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OfflineConnoisseur

Registered: 05/13/11
Posts: 34,686
Last seen: 5 years, 2 months
Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: BothHands]
    #22758594 - 01/09/16 06:53 PM (8 years, 22 days ago)

Fuck that was a typo I'm sorry I meant bupe


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OfflineBothHands
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Registered: 10/28/09
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Connoisseur]
    #22758601 - 01/09/16 06:54 PM (8 years, 22 days ago)

hahaha, yeah, but luckily I'm only on 2mg, and since it's prescribed, I can taper.  Cut the strips in half, cut in quarters, 8ths, etc.  It's a bit harder with the good stuff, cuse you want to nod so bad.


--------------------
Put America to sleep with warm milk and clichés.


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OfflineConnoisseur

Registered: 05/13/11
Posts: 34,686
Last seen: 5 years, 2 months
Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: BothHands]
    #22758605 - 01/09/16 06:55 PM (8 years, 22 days ago)

True I wish you luck


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OfflineBothHands
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Connoisseur]
    #22758621 - 01/09/16 06:58 PM (8 years, 22 days ago)

ty, and seriously, grats on your sobriety.  Are you off everything then?  Even alcohol and such?


--------------------
Put America to sleep with warm milk and clichés.


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OfflineConnoisseur

Registered: 05/13/11
Posts: 34,686
Last seen: 5 years, 2 months
Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: BothHands]
    #22758628 - 01/09/16 06:59 PM (8 years, 22 days ago)

I didn't use cocaine weed or any opiate last year

This year that will change I'm sure though lol


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Offlinebloodsheen
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Registered: 09/24/08
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: BothHands]
    #22758641 - 01/09/16 07:01 PM (8 years, 22 days ago)

Quote:

BothHands said:
I take 2mg suboxone, but aside from that, I've been clean for about 2 years now.  Well, I mean, I've had about 4 nods in those 2 years where I come off subs for a special occasion, but I don't really count that.  It's not the addict behavior I was having before where I dropped out of uni, got a minimum wage job, and just used entire paychecks on dillys.  Things have been somewhat insane, when I came back from SA, I was homeless for 3 months and still trying to take classes.  Not like, sleeping under a bridge homeless, but couch-surfing/hotel-surfing, I guess.  Then the girl who was my best friend at the time and I were going to move in together, but she wanted her boyfriend to come too, so we got a 3 bedroom.  He was paying her part of the rent anyway.  Well, she started getting out of control, and one night she punched herself in the face a bunch of times and asked me to lie to the cops about it so he would be arrested.  I said f that, and she called me heartless and grabbed my hair.  I eventually beat her ass, but she bit me pretty bad and I have a scar lol.  Also claw marks on my arms.  I'm living with her now ex-boyfriend, who has turned out to be really awesome.  He's in his early 30's, and it's so nice to live with someone who's kinda grown up already.  I don't need that kid shit anymore, it's just too dramatic for me.  He also goes to FAU, and has the exact same birthday as me (month and day, I'm a about 7 years younger).  We decided not the get physical though because the house is in my name only and I can't afford to not have his half of the rent, so why rock the boat?  He's way cool though, journalism major, has already had an employer fly him to peru, and he's doing this ghostwriting gig right now that's paying well.  Also in a punk band, sounds kind of like the Casualties, but with much better lyrics (if you could hear them haha).  Not really my scene, but it's still fun to go to his shows and do shots. :awesome:



Quote:

BothHands said:
I recently had the best sexual experience of my life.  I met the guy at a psytrance party in South Africa, and within 2 hours I was on the mattress he had in his tent.  The cum in my hair turned into dreadlocks after 3 days.  I went through a whole bottle of conditioner trying to get the dreads out.  :lol:  He was able to make his tongue vibrate to the sound of the music in the background and it was the most cosmic head I've ever had. 

I don't know, there was just something awesome about random casual sex with a super super sexy stranger on the floor in a tent with a bunch of people around, his friends around a campfire talking and passing bowls.  I was tripping so fucking hard I thought my family were talking about my behavior outside the tent, but I didn't care! lol.  (My family was not at this event, and my parents were still in the USA, but I heard them anyway :lol:)

I'm not super freaky, but that was a high point.  I was staying at my grandma's Bed and Breakfast in SA (she lives downstairs and has family guest rooms, and then the actual guests stay upstairs.  Well, this one guest was a geopolitical science professor with a doctorate, British accent, and liked to do mushrooms in the woods.  I wound up spending a night in his room instead of mine.  I'm sure my grandma knew what was up.  I guess exhibitionism is my style of freaky.




These two things...I'm like, on one hand I really envy people who've had crazy weird sexual experiences, but it almost always seems to have equally horrible side effects (those kinds of lifestyles I mean). I'd love to fuck some random girl in a tent but it seems like being a homeless druggie super comes with the territory

Just kinda sick of being bored as fuck and this made me think that maybe its worth it to have horrific experiences if it means I don't feel like killing myself from boredom and dissatisfaction

I'm sure thats what everyone says right before they end up in rehab :lol:


--------------------


A cautious young fellow named Lodge / Had seat belts installed in his Dodge. / When his date was strapped in / He committed a sin / Without even leaving the garage. That's clever, isn't it?-A boy and his dog


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OfflineBothHands
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Registered: 10/28/09
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: bloodsheen] * 1
    #22758701 - 01/09/16 07:15 PM (8 years, 22 days ago)

having no static place to stay was stressful, but not the end of the world.  I have no regrets.  I'm happy, and my life is on track.  3.66GPA working on a bachelors in neuroscience, 後悔していません, on track to live in Japan in the next few years, I dunno, things are ok.  Doing a minor in Japanese, and my school has an exchange program, and my GPA is good.  And if that doesn't work out, I'm going to do the JET thing and teach english for a year or two, just enough time to eat every single piece of food in the country.  The opiates and bad shit are really just a side effect of the bad company I used to keep.


--------------------
Put America to sleep with warm milk and clichés.


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