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Offlinekoods
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Registered: 05/26/11
Posts: 106,075
Loc: Maryland/DC Burbs
Last seen: 34 minutes, 21 seconds
Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Rigby_M]
    #18389843 - 06/08/13 09:15 PM (10 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

Rigby_M said:
Quote:

koods said:
I found a jerk off vid on Xtube and the dude looks almost exactly like me. Like, I wasn't really sure if he did, so I showed the video to a friend without any setup and he said "why are you uploading shit like this to the internet?" The crazy thing is, this dude seems to live only a couple miles from me - so I'm pretty sure there are people I know who have seen this video and think it's me. :facepalm:



Did you jerk off to his jerk off vid?




:shrug:


--------------------
NotSheekle said
“if I believed she was 16 I would become unattracted to her”


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Offlinekoods
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Registered: 05/26/11
Posts: 106,075
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Rewindicus]
    #18391243 - 06/09/13 04:43 AM (10 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

Rewindicus said:
Quote:

koods said:
Quote:

Dystopia said:
I wouldn't want to blow my clone or have my clone blow me. I'm not into bears.

Incest is fucking sexy because it's taboo, I don't know why so many people have a problem with it. I posted in a thread once in the Pub (first mistake) about how I fucked my third cousin when I was 14 (not a mistake).

I really hope it's just an American thing.

I'm not an advocate, but it's blown far the fuck out of proportion.




I found a jerk off vid on Xtube and the dude looks almost exactly like me. Like, I wasn't really sure if he did, so I showed the video to a friend without any setup and he said "why are you uploading shit like this to the internet?" The crazy thing is, this dude seems to live only a couple miles from me - so I'm pretty sure there are people I know who have seen this video and think it's me. :facepalm:




Aaaaaaaannnnnddddd obviously you should post the vid link :datass: :cheer:

Also would you have sex with him?




In a second.


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NotSheekle said
“if I believed she was 16 I would become unattracted to her”


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Invisiblekoraks
Registered: 06/02/03
Posts: 26,672
Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: The Lizard King]
    #18391275 - 06/09/13 05:24 AM (10 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

The Lizard King said:
Quote:

automan said:
Quote:

The Lizard King said:
Quote:

Dystopia said:





She's got some saggy boobs.




You're out of your mind!




Haha, they're seriously like halfway down her torso.

I'm not saying she's ugly or deformed, but those boobs are hanging low.



Oh horror! A real flesh and blood woman! I recommend you stick to internet pornography where poses can be optimized to create an illusory image of the female form.


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Anonymous #43

Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: koraks]
    #18527556 - 07/07/13 09:47 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

In vegas there is a club called green door. Look it up. Basicly me and my girl freind were screwing on a silk bed while like six gusy were jacking off. The best part was she started her period that night :wink:


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OfflineRewindicus
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Registered: 06/05/11
Posts: 5,491
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Anonymous #43]
    #18528097 - 07/08/13 12:21 AM (10 years, 6 months ago)

like while you were banging her to an audience?


--------------------
“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.”- Dr. Seuss

"Too much of a good thing, can be wonderful!" - Mae West

"If you have nothing nice to say about anyone, come sit next to me."
- Alice Roosevelt Longworth





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InvisibleThe Lizard King
Student Strawman
Male


Registered: 12/23/12
Posts: 2,429
Loc: Babylon
Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: koraks]
    #18528297 - 07/08/13 01:38 AM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

koraks said:
Oh horror! A real flesh and blood woman! I recommend you stick to internet pornography where poses can be optimized to create an illusory image of the female form.




Damn, sure got me there. :rolleyes:


--------------------
Dipping Swords in Metaphors


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Offlinekoods
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Registered: 05/26/11
Posts: 106,075
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: The Lizard King] * 3
    #18528412 - 07/08/13 02:46 AM (10 years, 6 months ago)

I met some random dude in a bar, and we end up at the end of a very secluded cul-de-sac that borders rock creek park in his car. We park there and I jerk him off and he jerks me off, and JUST as I'm coming, a police car pulls up right behind us. :uhoh: One cop quickly approaches his window, the other, mine. I have cum all over me. My cop taps on the window with his lit flashlight. It is very clear what we've been up to. There is another cop car pulling up behind the first. I roll down the window, and he says "did either of you see two black teenagers running up this street?" We say we hadn't and the cop thanks us and they all leave.


--------------------
NotSheekle said
“if I believed she was 16 I would become unattracted to her”


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OfflineRewindicus
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Registered: 06/05/11
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: koods]
    #18528433 - 07/08/13 02:56 AM (10 years, 6 months ago)

holy shit! close call! i would been like "YAH THAT WAY!"


There was one day where a load went missing. I had just got done messin with a guy in his moms basement (classy i know) but i never saw where his load went and didnt care.

Went to a corner store on the way home for a drink and as im handing the guy my card and i see him give a weird look at my arm. WELL I was immediately mortified. My arm was COVERED in jizz. I didnt feel it landing on my arm when it happened because they are just so damn manly and hairy.

There was no question about what it was i mean a guy knows what jizz looks like..... But i kept my cool acted like nothing was weird got my change and walked out while screaming to myself in my head about how i could  have walked like 5 blocks without noticing a giant load on my arm!?

Ah well.


--------------------
“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.”- Dr. Seuss

"Too much of a good thing, can be wonderful!" - Mae West

"If you have nothing nice to say about anyone, come sit next to me."
- Alice Roosevelt Longworth





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Offlinekoods
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Registered: 05/26/11
Posts: 106,075
Loc: Maryland/DC Burbs
Last seen: 34 minutes, 21 seconds
Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Rewindicus]
    #18528442 - 07/08/13 03:00 AM (10 years, 6 months ago)

You are an absolute whore. :super:


--------------------
NotSheekle said
“if I believed she was 16 I would become unattracted to her”


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OfflineRewindicus
Silly Goose
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Posts: 5,491
Last seen: 2 years, 2 months
Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: koods]
    #18528572 - 07/08/13 04:31 AM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Takes one to know one :datass:


--------------------
“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.”- Dr. Seuss

"Too much of a good thing, can be wonderful!" - Mae West

"If you have nothing nice to say about anyone, come sit next to me."
- Alice Roosevelt Longworth





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Anonymous #44

Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Rewindicus]
    #18529451 - 07/08/13 11:57 AM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Group sex  on multiple occasions with different peoples.


Im straight male and nearly 30


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OfflineApostle
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Registered: 12/12/09
Posts: 31,501
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Adden]
    #18529840 - 07/08/13 01:55 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

The Lizard King said:
Quote:

automan said:
Quote:

The Lizard King said:
Quote:

Dystopia said:





She's got some saggy boobs.




You're out of your mind!




Haha, they're seriously like halfway down her torso.

I'm not saying she's ugly or deformed, but those boobs are hanging low.



Quote:

Dystopia said:
I wouldn't want to blow my clone or have my clone blow me. I'm not into bears.

Incest is fucking sexy because it's taboo, I don't know why so many people have a problem with it. I posted in a thread once in the Pub (first mistake) about how I fucked my third cousin when I was 14 (not a mistake).

I really hope it's just an American thing.

I'm not an advocate, but it's blown far the fuck out of proportion.



:highfive:


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Offlinemicrodotty
Pro darts player!


Registered: 03/01/11
Posts: 1,670
Loc: England Flag
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Apostle]
    #18530153 - 07/08/13 03:22 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

awesome thread this.....


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Invisibletrekie
Metal man
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Registered: 05/11/09
Posts: 11,085
Loc: Larger cities Flag
Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: microdotty]
    #18530163 - 07/08/13 03:24 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Whats the suicides girl name I must fap to her


--------------------
I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.



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Offlinekoods
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: trekie] * 1
    #18530294 - 07/08/13 03:53 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

I posted in a thread once in the Pub (first mistake) about how I fucked my third cousin when I was 14 (not a mistake).





When did you fuck the first two? :hehehe:


--------------------
NotSheekle said
“if I believed she was 16 I would become unattracted to her”


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InvisibleRomi
Indigo Child
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Registered: 08/14/08
Posts: 425
Loc: Sunshine
Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: koods]
    #18536314 - 07/09/13 08:16 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Reading this makes me feel so inadequate. I gotta amp up my shit, I haven't done 95% of this thread. >.< I'm feeling left out!


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Anonymous #45

Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Romi]
    #18539802 - 07/10/13 03:21 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

On a business trip in Vancouver, BC ...hooked up with server at restaurant ....we both got extremely drunk and some wild, exhaustive sex at my hotel room.
Overslept and had departing flight that morning which I should already have been at the airport for. She was gone and there was blood all over the bed and me. She, evidently had her period and, I didn't know because the lights were out and I was a black out drunk at the time.

I didn't have time for a shower, so I washed around my stuff quickly with just washrags, brushed my teeth and checked out of hotel...flagged a cab and headed to the airport ...the cabdriver was of some African descent ....In a very thick accent he asked me if I was ok because there was dried blood all around my mouth, and the side of my face. I had passed out with contacts in and my eyes were so fucked up, I never saw the blood when I brushed my teeth. He had a little wet towelette packet in his glove box that I had to use. Needless to say, He got a good tip....this was before 9/11 so I made the flight (barely).

Had another similar experience with shit all over the sheets...but not around my face;)


Edited by Anonymous (08/27/13 02:45 PM)


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Anonymous #10

Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Rewindicus]
    #18539814 - 07/10/13 03:25 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Rewindicus said:
holy shit! close call! i would been like "YAH THAT WAY!"


There was one day where a load went missing. I had just got done messin with a guy in his moms basement (classy i know) but i never saw where his load went and didnt care.

Went to a corner store on the way home for a drink and as im handing the guy my card and i see him give a weird look at my arm. WELL I was immediately mortified. My arm was COVERED in jizz. I didnt feel it landing on my arm when it happened because they are just so damn manly and hairy.

There was no question about what it was i mean a guy knows what jizz looks like..... But i kept my cool acted like nothing was weird got my change and walked out while screaming to myself in my head about how i could  have walked like 5 blocks without noticing a giant load on my arm!?

Ah well.




How come you just didn't swallow the load??


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Offlinekoods
Ribbit
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Registered: 05/26/11
Posts: 106,075
Loc: Maryland/DC Burbs
Last seen: 34 minutes, 21 seconds
Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Anonymous #10]
    #18540249 - 07/10/13 05:11 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
Quote:

Rewindicus said:
holy shit! close call! i would been like "YAH THAT WAY!"


There was one day where a load went missing. I had just got done messin with a guy in his moms basement (classy i know) but i never saw where his load went and didnt care.

Went to a corner store on the way home for a drink and as im handing the guy my card and i see him give a weird look at my arm. WELL I was immediately mortified. My arm was COVERED in jizz. I didnt feel it landing on my arm when it happened because they are just so damn manly and hairy.

There was no question about what it was i mean a guy knows what jizz looks like..... But i kept my cool acted like nothing was weird got my change and walked out while screaming to myself in my head about how i could  have walked like 5 blocks without noticing a giant load on my arm!?

Ah well.




How come you just didn't swallow the load??




Good question. This is the exact reason why you eat that stuff.


--------------------
NotSheekle said
“if I believed she was 16 I would become unattracted to her”


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OfflineRewindicus
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Registered: 06/05/11
Posts: 5,491
Last seen: 2 years, 2 months
Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: koods]
    #18542378 - 07/11/13 02:14 AM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Ew. I dont eat rando loads thats nasty. I mean you can brush your teeth or wash your face with mine but im not doin nothin besides aiming it away from me with strangers! Call me a prude. :shrug:


--------------------
“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.”- Dr. Seuss

"Too much of a good thing, can be wonderful!" - Mae West

"If you have nothing nice to say about anyone, come sit next to me."
- Alice Roosevelt Longworth





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