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Offlinescienceguy
Instrument
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Registered: 11/27/09
Posts: 1,983
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: yogabunny]
    #14645420 - 06/20/11 09:33 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

My girlfriend and I were coming home from a night out, and as I was driving home, I started playing with her nipples, teasing them until they got hard and then let my hands start wandering up her legs while she shifted my car for me.  I assumed that when we parked a few blocks later, we'd go into her place and continue what we'd started, but she grabs the blanket out of the back of my car and says "How about over there?  You can be quick, right?"

We're in the middle of the city, at the corner of a side street and a fairly decent sized 5 lane city street, across the street from a fire station in the middle of the night.  There's a row of hedges that surrounds the building where it faces the street, and a two foot wall that follows the line of the hedges as it runs behind them.

I was taken aback at first, but as she grabbed my now hard cock I started leading her over to what I thought was a good place behind the hedges.  I bent her over, pulled down her pants, pulled her panties down, and slid my rock hard cock into her wet pussy.  She was quick...  I wasn't.  She came three times before I decided that I had to eat her, so in the middle of the city, in possible full view of others (if you happened to be at the right angle), I sat her down on the ledge with her legs in the air and my mouth on her until she came again.  She grabbed my cock and started sucking it, but I wasn't done fucking her yet...  I laid her back again with her legs in the air and went to town, both of us getting closer and closer to cumming together.  Just as she and I were cresting the peak of inevitable orgasm, as I was pulling out of her to cum on her tits, we realized that two people were walking down the sidewalk literally four feet from where we were fucking, barely separated by a row of hedges.  They never saw a thing.

Somehow, at 2am in a busy city, we fucked for 45 minutes without getting arrested.  We did, however, end up with a lot of hedge in our clothes.


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"Freedom starts between the ears."

Edward Abbey


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Anonymous #20

Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: yogabunny]
    #14645465 - 06/20/11 09:41 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

I had freaknasty sex on Illinois Wesleyans Quad. around the world twice.
When I got up, there was a jesus memorial right where we were doing it.


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OfflineJoolz
Male

Registered: 09/19/10
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Anonymous #20]
    #14646008 - 06/20/11 11:11 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

Its me (18), girlfriend (17), her little brother (15) and a kid in my grade at the time (18).

We drove to Kansas to watch a DCI show (drum corps, marching band). Our A/C died, so by about half way back we stop at this place and I just straight up strip to my boxers I'm so fucking hot. Well, the kid in my grade offers to drive, so me and the girl sit in the middle row of 3 in this van. Well, we somehow sneak our way to the back row, and start fooling around. Right about this time, the kid in my grade absent mindedly turned on the radio.

So I laid her down, pulled off her sport shorts, licked that pussy, then fucked her while we drove home. That was the only time she ever let me cum in her mouth, and she swallowed it. Nobody knew a thing.

Sad thing is that we dated for months and months after that, and the sex just dried up. She started over thinking it, blah blah, :shrug:


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Prohibition didn't work for God; Eve ate the fruit.


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Offlineimachavel
I loved and lost but I loved-ftw
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Registered: 06/06/07
Posts: 31,375
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: yogabunny]
    #14665987 - 06/24/11 03:03 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

yogabunny said:
Quote:

Crystal G said:
Quote:

vandago said:
Only if you have the prostate missy :wink: .  Seems pretty common in this thread.



I'd be interested in some of your dirty stories. 


I'd suck your tampon out




Here's my most epic story: http://www.shroomery.org/forums/showflat.php/Number/14609579#14609579





wow wow wow wow.


Moar stories plz!




are you

:whacker:? at the stories? :lol:


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:kingcrankey: I did not say to edit my signature soulidarity! Now forever I will never remember what I said about understanding the secrets of the universe by paying attention to subtleties!

:facepalm: I'm never giving you the password again. Jerk


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InvisibleyogabunnyM
fancy cat
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Registered: 11/01/09
Posts: 11,281
Loc: Nasty Women Get Shit Done
Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: imachavel] * 1
    #14670396 - 06/25/11 01:07 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

no, just reading them with wide-eyed wonderment.


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Offlineishallgofurthur
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Registered: 11/24/10
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: yogabunny]
    #14673392 - 06/26/11 02:33 AM (12 years, 7 months ago)

The dirtiest thing I have done is gotten fingered during english class and not gotten caught.. hahaha.


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Love and compassion are necessities, not luxuries.
Without them, humanity cannot survive.
~The 14th Dalai Lama


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InvisibleI_was_the_walrus
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: ishallgofurthur]
    #14673488 - 06/26/11 03:19 AM (12 years, 7 months ago)

loool I had a chearleader girlfriend back in highschool. I fingered her in the hall one day. We were both late for class, but god damn it was worth it.


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InvisibleDarkMatterOfFact
ZealtheDealforthePill
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Registered: 07/29/09
Posts: 1,602
Loc: South Cali
Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: I_was_the_walrus]
    #14673523 - 06/26/11 03:39 AM (12 years, 7 months ago)

its probably a toss up between banging a 42 year old milf (fucked her anal and came in her) when i was all coked out.

and this... http://www.shroomery.org/forums/showflat.php/Number/14620219#14620219



id'e probably say the latter.  considering  i lost my virginity under those circumstances, probably fucked my head up a little too.

oh well. :laugh2:


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Nixon was a asshole. Just look at his biggest creation. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the DEA.

Which secretly stands for Demonizing Everyone by Allegations.


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Anonymous #1

Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: DarkMatterOfFact]
    #14676022 - 06/26/11 05:28 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

It's not very dirty, but I did give three different guys head this week.


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InvisibleI_was_the_walrus
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #14676727 - 06/26/11 08:05 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

Note to self: Never kiss a shroomery chick.


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OfflineAninator
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: I_was_the_walrus] * 1
    #14677328 - 06/26/11 10:00 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

I_was_the_walrus said:
Note to self: Never kiss a shroomery chick.



Who's to say anon 1 as is a chick?


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InvisibleI_was_the_walrus
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Aninator]
    #14677425 - 06/26/11 10:22 PM (12 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

Aninator said:
Quote:

I_was_the_walrus said:
Note to self: Never kiss a shroomery chick.



Who's to say anon 1 as is a chick?




Statistics.


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InvisibleyogabunnyM
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Registered: 11/01/09
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: I_was_the_walrus]
    #14698826 - 06/30/11 08:37 PM (12 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

I_was_the_walrus said:
Note to self: Never kiss a shroomery chick.





:laugh2:


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InvisibleCharles
I eat bugs.
Male

Registered: 06/07/00
Posts: 622
Loc: NE Arkansas
Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: I_was_the_walrus]
    #14700145 - 07/01/11 02:29 AM (12 years, 6 months ago)

Oops. Never mind.


Edited by Charles (07/01/11 02:31 AM)


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Anonymous #21

Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Charles]
    #14700172 - 07/01/11 02:38 AM (12 years, 6 months ago)

atm with my 24yr old t-girl. :omgawesome: While on Molly.. :omgawesome:


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Offline28064212
Special Agent Dale Cooper
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: yogabunny]
    #14700225 - 07/01/11 03:02 AM (12 years, 6 months ago)

Here is some stuff that turns me on.
Like YB, kissing after oral sex is pretty hot, IMO.

I like things messy in sex fluids.
I'd love to go down on my lover, my face soaked in her fluids, and heavily make out with her.
Then she'd go down on me, and I'd cum in her mouth, she'd hold it in there and heavily make out with me.
And after/before this we'd come over/on each other a few times.

Our bodies and faces will be covered in my cum, her cum, and sweat.

Slowly and sensually we'd take turns licking each other clean.
:awecluster:


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Anonymous #22

Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: 28064212]
    #14701732 - 07/01/11 12:56 PM (12 years, 6 months ago)

All you deviants need Jesus.


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InvisibleI_was_the_walrus
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: 28064212]
    #14701803 - 07/01/11 01:12 PM (12 years, 6 months ago)

You like to make out with her, with your load in her mouth? Like...cum swapping your own jizz?


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Offlinerodfarva
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Registered: 07/31/07
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: I_was_the_walrus] * 2
    #14701813 - 07/01/11 01:15 PM (12 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

I_was_the_walrus said:
You like to make out with her, with your load in her mouth? Like...cum swapping your own jizz?




gets head, refuses to kiss after.

:scumbagsteve:


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Offline28064212
Special Agent Dale Cooper
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: I_was_the_walrus]
    #14702571 - 07/01/11 04:04 PM (12 years, 6 months ago)

Kissing after head is hot.
Just ask yogabunny.
:dancingbear:


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