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Anonymous #1
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Dating someone who doesn't use psychedelics
#14101212 - 03/10/11 10:16 PM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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I would like to get some insight on dating someone who doesn't use drugs, specifically psychedelics. Personally, psychedelics have a place in my heart that no single human could ever change... Except for possibly the right woman! As much as I love psychedelics, I need the type of love only a girlfriend can bring
So for those who have been in this situation, was your partner cool with you continuing your use of psychedelics? Did you ever stop using psychedelics for your partner? Did you ever regret discontinuing your travels because of this a loved one?
The reason I am asking is because I have been recently dating this girl who does not use drugs. She wouldn't be upset about my prior use of psychedelics... But she would also not want me using them if I plan on fully going out with her. Personally I dont trip often, so it wouldn't be TOO big of an issue... but I wanted to hear about some personal experiences first!
thanks
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Cyclohexylamine
Turn on, Tune in, Drop out



Registered: 09/08/10
Posts: 14,327
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Re: Dating someone who doesn't use psychedelics [Re: Anonymous #1]
#14101283 - 03/10/11 10:25 PM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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First NEVER change yourself for anyone to keep them around. That is one of the biggest mistakes I see people make all the time.
If you want to change, do it because YOU want to. Not because you feel pressured to.
All my girl friends except my current one have never been into "real" drugs or anything like that (only alcohol and weed). When I met my current girl she was very very anti drug. However I let her know from the very beginning that I used drugs, I used them responsibly, I was not going to stop, but I would never force her or pressure her to try them.
At first it was hard eg. she started crying but we talked all night and eventually she saw my side of it.
Then months later she decided she wanted to try it, I gave her MDMA, and the rest is history lol.
Now that I am dating someone who actively does drugs with me and parties with me I would NEVER go back. It gives this whole new connection to your relationship. It makes it alot deeper. And doing MDMA with someone you care about is one of the most amazing things in the world.
I think the main thing is communication. Make sure you show that you are not willing to stop, but you are willing to talk about it, discuss her fears, show her information on it if she wants, and never pressure her.
Remember to people who have never tried drugs someone who does drugs is a horrible person. And then when they find out that you do it, your not all fucked up, you are informed and are willing to discuss it, it clicks that maybe this isn't what the government says it is.
-------------------- Yes this is tymo - I just changed my name Have you ever had a dream that you were so sure was real? What if you were unable to awake from that dream? How would you know the difference between that dream world and the real world? There is NOTHING better than feeling that warm dissociative fuzz creeping up your body from IM K Something abut that anaesthetic rush... Qualitative Research Chemical Effects and Experiences The Wonderful World of Methoxetamine The 3-Meo-PCP Chapters, Part One
Edited by Cyclohexylamine (03/10/11 10:26 PM)
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Pony
Part-Time Bra



Registered: 11/01/09
Posts: 287
Loc: Oklahoma
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Re: Dating someone who doesn't use psychedelics [Re: Anonymous #1]
#14101352 - 03/10/11 10:36 PM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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Well, you will likely want to do things together and of like mind, my opinion is she will either start doing them, or you will stop, not because of desire, but because of interest.
-------------------- Sacred cows make the best hamburgers.
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runningfox2002
Engineer



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Re: Dating someone who doesn't use psychedelics [Re: Cyclohexylamine]
#14101607 - 03/10/11 11:29 PM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
tymoteusz3 said: First NEVER change yourself for anyone to keep them around. That is one of the biggest mistakes I see people make all the time.
If you want to change, do it because YOU want to. Not because you feel pressured to.
I think the main thing is communication. Make sure you show that you are not willing to stop, but you are willing to talk about it, discuss her fears, show her information on it if she wants, and never pressure her.
Remember to people who have never tried drugs someone who does drugs is a horrible person. And then when they find out that you do it, your not all fucked up, you are informed and are willing to discuss it, it clicks that maybe this isn't what the government says it is.

I currently have been with my sig other for over 4+ years now. To make a long story short:
She found a bottle with pot leafs in them, not pot, and asked me about it. Told her about my previous uses of what i've experimented with. Wasn't happy at first but she was also very naive. Didn't know her parents smoked back in the day til she met me, remembered finding one of her parents joint holders(not knowing what it was) and they told her what it was. She was shocked. She tried it with me a few times...GREAT! Had a better view and that pot smokers weren't all scum. She still has a long way to go, because like myself, I too was confused by propaganda and see it for what it really is/was. Everything takes time and if its worth it, she wont readily run off. 
Also wanted to add that when she was having anxiety probs, her parents told her to have me give her some pot mwhaha!
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...to have some fun? Nobody knows Anything I say or talk about is strictly for my own search of knowledge and to satisfy my thirst of curiosity.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Dating someone who doesn't use psychedelics [Re: runningfox2002]
#14101899 - 03/11/11 12:47 AM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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I dont think this girl is going to budge with her viewpoint. She seems like the type whos done drugs in the past but wont ever do anything again. I guess I will find out soon enough. I just dont want another girl who will say it's ok to do them... then when I do, make a big deal about it and basically ruin the experience.
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McDude
Omerta




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Re: Dating someone who doesn't use psychedelics [Re: Anonymous #1]
#14112451 - 03/13/11 12:20 AM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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Yeah man! I told my current gf about my past use and intent on future use when we first started dating. She was ok with me growing mushrooms which now 7 months later isn't ok anymore. I told her I would continue to do E, be it even only every few years. I told her of my strong intention to experiment with mescaline and dmt.
Now none of it is ok. She wants me to stop growing and says I won't be trying the other because she'll worry to much. Negative outcomes that could arise from doing things etc...I plan to do psycedelics the rest of my life. She was aware of this. Of course that doesn't matter now. She is a great girl and I couldn't ask to be treated better. I was married before and I changed alot for me ex. I really truly whole heartedly loved that girl. She fucked around and ran off. I swore I would never again change who I was or what I wanted to do with my life for another person.
Logically there are no fucking guarantees..you change they leave. Then what??? Your some place you don't want to be when you could be someplace you dreamed of being. All because you changed and set your life in stone based on a commitment that comes with no guarantees.
I'm half drunk and maybe rambling. Don't change yourself and if you don't share the same mind set then move on and find someone that does...what I was getting at.
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For cultivation troubleshooting/advice visit us here As below so above I imagine. Drawn outside the lines of reason. Push the envelope, Watch it bend!
 
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Takura001
Stranger than strange



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Re: Dating someone who doesn't use psychedelics [Re: McDude]
#14113988 - 03/13/11 12:12 PM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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Okay heres the deal. I'm one of those girlfriends who doesn't do psychedelics, but my boyfriend does.
The difference is that I used to partake in some of these activities, he doesn't seem much different when he uses them, and I am willing to try some things.
I am not big on weed but he's a daily smoker. I knew him before he started smoking too.
If your girlfriend loves you she won't have a problem with you doing your drugs.
There are a few things that I would understand is probably just her concern for you, but if she is serious about not letting you do some things that you enjoy and you feel are safe, then I can tell you there are girls out there that will have no problem with your kind of entertainment.
I for one don't feel safe with things like K2 and really hard drugs but I wouldn't ind trying X or LSD at least once. I think if done right shrooms can be great but only if it's not done all the time.
So I guess what I'm saying is that I wouldn't give it up on her, but if you are really having a problem with not doing some drugs then theres hope in finding someone out there who will accept these things.
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Anonymous #2
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Edited by Anonymous (04/05/11 02:03 PM)
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Sterile
mushroom lover



Registered: 03/16/01
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Re: Dating someone who doesn't use psychedelics [Re: Anonymous #2]
#14154750 - 03/20/11 04:32 PM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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Some thoughts...
Why tell someone details about what you like/dislike to shove down your throat? Don't lie but don't make her panic either.
I'm shure you can be all discreet about your use and i dont see why you should provoke anxiety to someone who hasn't got a clue about what you do.
Some things are better kept a secret since there is no practical reason to let them show up.
You are not making a list of what types of food you like to eat for her. So why make a list of what drugs you like to consume? You would want to do so, only if you feel guilty me thinks.
I am also very sceptical if such relationships can work in the long run, but if you can let the knowledge of your trips and the outcome of your psychedelic experiences talk to her, it would be a more subtle approach than starting to talk about what you've consumed and making her freak out.
You can't really describe a psychedelic experience to a sober person anyway.
it's not about the substances, its about the transformation of character they provoke.You could have reached the same point by meditation. You only feel the urge to speak about drug use if you are really trying to find another person to trip with...not by consuming the drugs, but by re-living your drug experiences while visiting your drug-memories....its basicaly the same thing you know..
-------------------- The Source Of The Force Is The Power Of The Mind "if you don't like what you're doing, you can always pick up your needle and move to another groove." - timothy leary" Anno: "-I can do anything with those clouds!" Annos Tek
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Anonymous #3
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Re: Dating someone who doesn't use psychedelics [Re: Sterile]
#14155068 - 03/20/11 05:47 PM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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My girlfriend, when we first met, didn't seem to mind my drug use.
Once the relationship started getting deep, she expressed her disapproval of my psychedelic drug use. I thought about this long and hard and ended up becoming sober-I quit. I didn't do drugs for about 6 months when I realized that I had really changed a big part of me for this girl in hopes that she would slowly come to. She didn't budge on her opening up towards psychedelics but was okay with using the drugs of her choice (mainly pot and a little ecstasy)-which I thought was unfair-so I started blasting off occasionally. It resulted in a lot of upset, fights, etc.. but in the end I told her that in the end I don't want to change this part of me.
A year and a half in, I felt that I had respected her wishes long enough with no effort on her end to meet me in the middle. Many loooonnng talks, fights, breaks, and very little good came from this.. but in the end she still wasn't happy with my drug use. I let her know that this, in sense, meant she didn't love 'me' for 'me' completely. She had exceptions to loving me.
We're two years into the relationship now. I've slowly been headed towards my normal drug use (although sometimes secretively-yea, it sucks). It got to the point where I let her know that she can't keep forcing me to stop using and if it wasn't okay with her then we need to part ways.
Since then, she's been trying very hard to be accepting of my drug use. In order to make her feel more comfortable with me using drugs, she has agreed to join me for a low-dose mushroom trip to experience how I'm "fucking myself up".
This makes me very happy as I'm finally seeing some effort on her end. I'm not happy, though, because she is still demanding that I don't use drugs until we have this mushroom trip (which won't happen until she's ready).
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somuchbeautyndirt
The fruit that ate itself



Registered: 02/07/11
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Re: Dating someone who doesn't use psychedelics [Re: Sterile]
#14155090 - 03/20/11 05:53 PM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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I tried shrooms a year ago and feel in love. After words I new I wanted to do it again! So I did some research and grew them myself. In the mist my boyfriend of 7 years and now fiance had no clue (at the time) I was growing. He knew I tried it. I told him I was thinking about it and was going to try it and I had the whole thing safely planned. He was very upset! Me being selfish and young I did it anyways. He called later and asked if I was still going to do it.... I responded I already did. I was perfectly fine, happy and safe yet he was still mad. I don't drink anymore, but when I did it was bad....depression, dangerously flirtaceous and always ended up passing out, but he'd prefer me do that than shrooms! I truely love this guy, but he is so closed minded! Not saying that religious ppl ruin everything, but the definition of right/wrong has warped his mind so bad he can't see one good thing about shrooms and bc alcohol is legal he thinks it is better! DUMBASS! With that said we argue on drugs frequently. The thing that makes me even more angry is that I rarely do any drug and I NEVER drink! I am a college student too how rare is that? I exercise almost everyday getting ready to run my 2nd marathon (I'm 23) yet he still freaks when I have the occasional toke or trip. With that ALL said you need to do what YOU need to do to be happy and feel you are living your life to its full potential as long as you are being sensible/smart with it. Also, if I hadn't met this guy I'd search for a guy like him, but obviously more open minded and related more with me so make sure before you get too deep that you can be comfortable and safe with this mate. I always wish my fiance could trip with me or at least be there with me and he won't even do that! I hope this wasn't a waste of your time, but thanks for reading I too needed to vent. Be safe and good luck! Oh and I am looking to grow some more lol! Just need to figure out what strain )
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HuHEN
I am the Owl



Registered: 10/19/07
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My girlfriend doesn't do drugs  I am going to try to convince her to take acid or shrooms with me but I don't think she will.
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Anonymous #2
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Edited by Anonymous (04/05/11 02:01 PM)
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Anonymous #3
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Re: Dating someone who doesn't use psychedelics [Re: Anonymous #2]
#14156583 - 03/20/11 10:02 PM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Anonymous said:
Quote:
HuHEN said: My girlfriend doesn't do drugs  I am going to try to convince her to take acid or shrooms with me but I don't think she will.
Don't convince her, invite her. Not everyone needs to trip / take drugs.
Agreed.
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Sterile
mushroom lover



Registered: 03/16/01
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Re: Dating someone who doesn't use psychedelics [Re: Anonymous #2]
#14157938 - 03/21/11 04:32 AM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Anonymous said:
Quote:
HuHEN said: My girlfriend doesn't do drugs  I am going to try to convince her to take acid or shrooms with me but I don't think she will.
Don't convince her, invite her. Not everyone needs to trip / take drugs.
-------------------- The Source Of The Force Is The Power Of The Mind "if you don't like what you're doing, you can always pick up your needle and move to another groove." - timothy leary" Anno: "-I can do anything with those clouds!" Annos Tek
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HuHEN
I am the Owl



Registered: 10/19/07
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Re: Dating someone who doesn't use psychedelics [Re: Anonymous #2]
#14159444 - 03/21/11 02:00 PM (12 years, 10 months ago) |
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I'm not gonna like force her by convince her I really mean invite her. I'm not gonna dose her or anything. I doesn't really bother me but I just think it would be fun to trip with her.
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spacecaked
Quiet observer



Registered: 06/05/11
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Re: Dating someone who doesn't use psychedelics [Re: Cyclohexylamine]
#14604048 - 06/13/11 01:24 AM (12 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
tymoteusz3 said: First NEVER change yourself for anyone to keep them around. That is one of the biggest mistakes I see people make all the time.
-------------------- Buy the ticket, take the ride.
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Joolz


Registered: 09/19/10
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Re: Dating someone who doesn't use psychedelics [Re: spacecaked]
#14604059 - 06/13/11 01:26 AM (12 years, 7 months ago) |
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I remember this thread 
Still haven't found that psychonaut girl. Still looking though.
-------------------- Prohibition didn't work for God; Eve ate the fruit.
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Subconscious
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Re: Dating someone who doesn't use psychedelics [Re: Joolz]
#14613280 - 06/14/11 05:03 PM (12 years, 7 months ago) |
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Old thread, but i'll contribute anyway...
My girlfriend smokes weed every day, but only trips with me 1-2 a year.
Honestly I prefer it that way, I only enjoy tripping with her on occasion... it can be awesome to have a deep trip with your loved one but most of the time I either want to be playing my guitar or out on an epic adventure in the woods. I would get annoyed if she tried to trip with me every time... mainly because when we trip together it's usually for her, and when I trip alone I just do whatever the fuck I want.
It's definitely good to have a chick who isn't on your case and will let you do what you want though...
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