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Offlinenicechrisman
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Dating a sober girl?
    #13998556 - 02/20/11 10:21 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

So I'm going on a date with this girl who I used to work with tomorrow. We've hung out a couple times. I actually took her mushroom hunting for chantrelles in the fall.

Thing is- I don't think I've ever dated a girl who doesn't smoke pot or at least drink alcohol. I really like her personality and she's super cute and pretty and stuff, but intoxication has become such an everyday part of my life, I'm not sure if this could work out. Then again, maybe it would be good for me. She doesn't seem like the controlling or judgemental type (although i guess they don't at first), and she knows that I do these things (we haven't talked about psychedelics yet). Also I tend to be a little shy about putting the moves on, and have always found alcohol to be a useful social lubricant in these types of situations.

Anybody else here ever date a totally sober person? I'm not even sure what to do together. I need some shroomery opinions on this matter.


--------------------
"Cosmic Love is absolutelely ruthless and highly indifferent:
it teaches its lessons whether you like/dislike them or not."

John C. Lily

 


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OfflineMello KittyS
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: nicechrisman]
    #13998580 - 02/20/11 10:24 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

in my experience it doesnt work. but taking her mushie hunting, now that sounds like chemistry :happyheart: :thumbup:

EDIT: i wasnt thinking girl :confused: but sober boys oops.


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Edited by ellenallien (02/20/11 10:27 PM)


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OfflineAnthony917
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: Mello Kitty]
    #13998591 - 02/20/11 10:26 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

the two lifestyles just clash so much, I think it's bound to fail...
although, who knows...maybe you'll see this girl and turn her on to the idea of smoking weed or drinking.
I've found a lot of people who don't drink/smoke have a lot of false, preconceived notions about the effects. Once they see that someone who smokes pot every day can actually live a normal, happy life, sometimes their view changes.

If all else fails you could at least DSHSB


--------------------
Prisoner#1 said: I got my ass kicked by a 9yo when I was 17
Trippin? Click Me




What is life? I'm tired of life...


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Offlinenicechrisman
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: Anthony917]
    #13998616 - 02/20/11 10:31 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

I don't really want to try to change her. I actually kinda respect the choices she's made. We've talked about that before. She's totally an artist and involved in the art scene, has lots of gay friends, etc. It's not like she's sheltered or hasn't had the chance to try things, she's just made the conscious decision not to. I can accept that about her as long as she can accept me.

In all honesty, I kinda wish I could break out of the habits of intoxication that i'm currently in. Not like I'm into heavy drugs, but daily use of alcohol and large amounts of marijuana aren't the best thing for me I think.


--------------------
"Cosmic Love is absolutelely ruthless and highly indifferent:
it teaches its lessons whether you like/dislike them or not."

John C. Lily

 


Edited by nicechrisman (02/20/11 10:33 PM)


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OfflineAnthony917
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: nicechrisman]
    #13998630 - 02/20/11 10:34 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

nicechrisman said:
I don't really want to try to change her. I actually kinda respect the choices she's made. We've talked about that before. She's totally and artist and involved in the art scene, has lots of gay friends, etc. It's not like she's sheltered or hasn't had the chance to try things, she's just made the conscious decision not to. I can accept that about her as long as she can accept me.

In all honesty, I kinda wish I could break out of the habits of intoxication that i'm currently in. Not like I'm into heavy drugs, but daily use of alcohol and large amounts of marijuana aren't the best thing for me I think.




hmm, well in that case definitely DSHSB.
I mean, the conflict of interest seems to be insurmountable. Although, if she's as open minded as you say, and she likes you then I suppose it could work.
I wouldn't want to date her if I was you, cause I'd rather have my GF smoking & drinking with me.


--------------------
Prisoner#1 said: I got my ass kicked by a 9yo when I was 17
Trippin? Click Me




What is life? I'm tired of life...


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Offlinesmokin427
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: Anthony917]
    #13998654 - 02/20/11 10:37 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

dude dont just start talking about drugs with a girl who doesn't do'em. that relationship wont last long


--------------------
I know exactly what you mean. Let me tell you why you're here. You're here because you know something. What you know you can't explain, but you feel it. You've felt it your entire life, that there's something wrong with the world. You don't know what it is, but it's there, like a splinter in your mind, driving you mad. It is this feeling that has brought you to me. Do you know what I'm talking about?


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OfflineThe_Ghost
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: nicechrisman] * 2
    #13998669 - 02/20/11 10:40 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Corrupt her. Its the only way.


--------------------
/ / / / / / / LISTEN TO MY MUSIC: E X E D / / / / / / /
The universe gives no fucks. And takes no fucks.
May His Circuits Ever Function


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Offlinenicechrisman
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: smokin427]
    #13998674 - 02/20/11 10:40 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

smokin427 said:
dude dont just start talking about drugs with a girl who doesn't do'em. that relationship wont last long



yeah, that wasn't really too close to the list of topics I had figured on discussing. I think we're gonna go for a walk if it's nice tomorrow, get some dinner and go bowling, or play shuffleboard or something.


--------------------
"Cosmic Love is absolutelely ruthless and highly indifferent:
it teaches its lessons whether you like/dislike them or not."

John C. Lily

 


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OfflineAnthony917
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: nicechrisman]
    #13998693 - 02/20/11 10:44 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

nicechrisman said:
Quote:

smokin427 said:
dude dont just start talking about drugs with a girl who doesn't do'em. that relationship wont last long



yeah, that wasn't really too close to the list of topics I had figured on discussing. I think we're gonna go for a walk if it's nice tomorrow, get some dinner and go bowling, or play shuffleboard or something.




capping the night off with a fatty spliff :getstoned:


--------------------
Prisoner#1 said: I got my ass kicked by a 9yo when I was 17
Trippin? Click Me




What is life? I'm tired of life...


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Offlinenicechrisman
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: Anthony917]
    #13998702 - 02/20/11 10:47 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Or DSHSB.


or both...


--------------------
"Cosmic Love is absolutelely ruthless and highly indifferent:
it teaches its lessons whether you like/dislike them or not."

John C. Lily

 


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Invisibleenthiangenic


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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: nicechrisman]
    #13998719 - 02/20/11 10:51 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Maybe she will be good for you. You said you'd like to lessen the amount of alcohol and weed you use, so maybe she can be the catalyst to bring about a happier life style. And if it doesn't work out well it's just some more memories. Life is about experience after all.

I think love is the most powerful psychedelic there is...because it can last a lifetime. And just like a powerful trip, love will leave a deep impression on you forever.


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Offlinenicechrisman
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: enthiangenic]
    #13998735 - 02/20/11 10:56 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

thanks for the positive response. I'm hoping it will go well.


--------------------
"Cosmic Love is absolutelely ruthless and highly indifferent:
it teaches its lessons whether you like/dislike them or not."

John C. Lily

 


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Offlinenicechrisman
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: nicechrisman]
    #13998963 - 02/20/11 11:49 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Oh yeah, one more thing I forgot to mention-she's vegetarian too. Makes me wonder what her vice is. I mean everyone's gotta have one. Maybe she's into some crazy sexual shit or something :datass:


--------------------
"Cosmic Love is absolutelely ruthless and highly indifferent:
it teaches its lessons whether you like/dislike them or not."

John C. Lily

 


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OfflineEnvix
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: nicechrisman]
    #13998995 - 02/20/11 11:58 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

bring her over to the dark side  :hellfire:

i mean the brighter side


--------------------
smack a hoe out this dimension
continue my ascension
-bhad bhabie

rip. todcasil, acid sloth, st1llnox, zappaisgod, big worm (sketch), tim b


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InvisibleMisterMuscaria
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: nicechrisman]
    #13999282 - 02/21/11 01:24 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

I wish I could meet a sober girl. I no longer smoke pot, drink or do any illegal drugs yet all the girls who are interested in me are complete stoners or drunks.


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InvisibleCakk
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: Envix]
    #13999294 - 02/21/11 01:30 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

You never know she might come to realize pot isn't bad on her own might as well see where it goes


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OfflineEnvix
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: MisterMuscaria] * 3
    #13999296 - 02/21/11 01:30 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

lol square wut are you doing on a drug forum


--------------------
smack a hoe out this dimension
continue my ascension
-bhad bhabie

rip. todcasil, acid sloth, st1llnox, zappaisgod, big worm (sketch), tim b


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Invisiblegzuf
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: Envix]
    #13999301 - 02/21/11 01:33 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)



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+1 Post ٩(̾๏̮̮̃̾๏̃̾)۶



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InvisibleMisterMuscaria
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: Envix]
    #13999316 - 02/21/11 01:39 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

Envix said:
lol square wut are you doing on a drug forum



Im a former user but still want to hunt edible mushrooms when the season hits. Honestly i just like the banter here. When I signed up I was tripping every week, drinking daily and smoking pot daily. Thangs happened and now Im living a straighter life.


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OfflineVituGhazy
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: MisterMuscaria]
    #13999376 - 02/21/11 02:02 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

If she wont judge you for what you're doing, you're fine. Sometimes even chicks who drink/smoke are very judgmental and think you intoxicate yourself too much.

But it would be very nice, you would always have someone to look after you when you overdose :laugh: and you have a designated driver.


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OfflineEnvix
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: MisterMuscaria]
    #13999487 - 02/21/11 02:43 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

ah well i guess i dont do any drugs either.. just a couple cigs every day i havent had any cannabis in months. and i only trip DMT on occasions like once a month or so..
only done mushrooms about  3 times
acid once.
mescaline maybe 4 times
2ce i think 3 times

also coffee sometimes

ive been smokin JWH daily for about a year but just stopped.. like literally just a couple seconds ago im all out now and cant get any more cuz its illegal lol

i was gettin sick of that stuff anyway :shrug:


--------------------
smack a hoe out this dimension
continue my ascension
-bhad bhabie

rip. todcasil, acid sloth, st1llnox, zappaisgod, big worm (sketch), tim b


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Invisiblegerryjarcia
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: nicechrisman]
    #13999890 - 02/21/11 08:11 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

i'd just roll with it. i tend to over think shit like this (and everything else, for that matter). it would be nice to have someone to enjoy boulevard park with when the sun is shining and that beautiful breeze is blowing in off the bay :psychsplit:

b'ham is a trip in itself, no intoxication required. as long as she doesn't get all preachy about the "sober life" than i'd just take it as it comes and let it be what it is.


--------------------


"We are all intoxicated. We were born into an insane asylum, a world crazy-making. We believe what we see and hear. The real myth is the myth of sanity, of rationality: it's a disease that is eating away at the earth. All the poisons flow from our denial. We deny madness, we forget our crimes, we dismember the corpse, we imprison our children. We need poison to poison the poison, to remember the sacred nature of intoxication, the green body of the young god." ~ Dale Pendell


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Offlinesunset_mission
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: gerryjarcia]
    #14000268 - 02/21/11 10:02 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

It can work. Been with my girl (who I would honestly consider my soulmate) for nearly 3 years now and apart from a bit of alcohol with me or the odd bowl once in 3 blue moons she's not into drugs whatsoever yet things are pretty smooth. She does know that I do utilize psychedelics with meditation every now and then, but how frequently is unknown. She can see a positive change in me however. :shrug:

But yeah, definitely go for it regardless of the fact that she doesn't do drugs. At least you can rest assured she'll be your purer half/voice of reason if this does kick off. Plus it'll make you appreciate finding joy even during sobriety.


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InvisibleRobMarley420
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: nicechrisman]
    #14000283 - 02/21/11 10:04 AM (12 years, 11 months ago)

I think in order for the relationship to work you will have to cut down on your drug use a little bit, or she will have to start getting high and going to the bars with you a little bit. You'll have to find some sort of middle ground. I don't think it'd work if she was 100% sober and you get high on a daily basis.

When I met my girlfriend she wasn't a drug user and we've been together for 3 years now. :heart:
She had only smoked weed a handful of times and that was it. But now she loves psychedelics as much as I do and she has done pretty much every drug under the sun. She gets high just as much as I do now.


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Offlinenicechrisman
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: RobMarley420]
    #14000922 - 02/21/11 12:03 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

As I said earlier, I want to reduce my usage of weed and particularly alcohol lately. I think this could be a good catalyst for this.

We haven't really talked about psychedelics before. She has brought up the not drinking not smoking weed thing a fair number of times, but almost kinda in an apologetic way? Like she feels like she needs to explain herself for it. I actually kinda respect it. It would be cool to introduce her to mushrooms or something non habit forming like that. I would feel bad if I introduced her to something habit forming though. Just cuz I have habits doesn't mean I need to validate them by getting others to have them too.


--------------------
"Cosmic Love is absolutelely ruthless and highly indifferent:
it teaches its lessons whether you like/dislike them or not."

John C. Lily

 


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OfflineAnthony917
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: nicechrisman]
    #14001004 - 02/21/11 12:21 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

nicechrisman said:
As I said earlier, I want to reduce my usage of weed and particularly alcohol lately. I think this could be a good catalyst for this.

We haven't really talked about psychedelics before. She has brought up the not drinking not smoking weed thing a fair number of times, but almost kinda in an apologetic way? Like she feels like she needs to explain herself for it. I actually kinda respect it. It would be cool to introduce her to mushrooms or something non habit forming like that. I would feel bad if I introduced her to something habit forming though. Just cuz I have habits doesn't mean I need to validate them by getting others to have them too.




or invalidate them by being with someone who doesn't participate with you...
I mean, I would never cut back my smoking or shrooming just for a bitch. You should cut back for yourself, because that's the only way it will actually stick.
Good luck though...
also, PICS NAO


--------------------
Prisoner#1 said: I got my ass kicked by a 9yo when I was 17
Trippin? Click Me




What is life? I'm tired of life...


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Offlinenicechrisman
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: Anthony917]
    #14001014 - 02/21/11 12:24 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

I do want to reduce my use for my own reasons. Not my use of mushrooms, but I usually only shroom a couple/few times a year, so it's not really a habit for me, but weed and alcohol have both become VERY habitual for me. I'm not giving them up for a "bitch" as you so eloquently put it. I haven't spoken of giving anything up, I just think it would be positive for me to have someone in my life who doesn't view intoxication as their "raison d'etre". In fact she has never made any indication that it's an issue. Like I said, she seems almost apologetic that she doesn't get intoxicated.

got no pix. Sorry


--------------------
"Cosmic Love is absolutelely ruthless and highly indifferent:
it teaches its lessons whether you like/dislike them or not."

John C. Lily

 


Edited by nicechrisman (02/21/11 12:30 PM)


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OfflineAcaterpillar
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: nicechrisman]
    #14001051 - 02/21/11 12:31 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

You guys are bold for posting pics of girlfriends. That shit could come back and bite you in the ass :uhoh:


--------------------
Aaa...E I O Uuu...A E I O Uuu..A E I O uh Uuu..
*Cough* *Cough*
Ooo...U E I O Aaa...U E I Aaa..A E I O Uuuuu...

At first sight, The Perfection of Wisdom is bewildering, full of paradox and apparent irrationality.


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Offlinebenzod
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: nicechrisman]
    #14001140 - 02/21/11 12:43 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

nicechrisman said:
She doesn't seem like the controlling or judgemental type (although i guess they don't at first)



Haha, so true!
Seems like you really like her if you are considering this.
Cliche, but don't be afraid to be yourself, cause you might have times where you deny or hide your lifestyle choices to get on her good side.  I personally have not had good experiences dating someone that was completely sober all the time.  Problems arise when your not yourself  around them in an alter state, because your afraid of what they truly think about it.  Goes both ways though. 
Wish you the best!


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OfflineAnthony917
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: Acaterpillar]
    #14001229 - 02/21/11 12:57 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

Rabidbaboon said:
You guys are bold for posting pics of girlfriends. That shit could come back and bite you in the ass :uhoh:




Wow...wow, this girl isn't his girlfriend. Therefore I think it's absolutely appropriate so we, as the shroomery community, can pass our judgement down to the OP.


--------------------
Prisoner#1 said: I got my ass kicked by a 9yo when I was 17
Trippin? Click Me




What is life? I'm tired of life...


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OfflineMr E Guest
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: nicechrisman]
    #14001231 - 02/21/11 12:57 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Go for it mate. IME having a straight edge lady around really helps if you want to cut back on intake yourself. Lessens the exposure. I got a good feeling for you here. Be honest with her - I think she can handle it, from what little I've gathered here.


--------------------
Be joyful. This could be the only chance you get.

All of the above posts are the fevered imaginings of a deluded mind, itself entirely the fictional creation of a somewhat peculiar author with a bizarre sense of humour.


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OfflineAcaterpillar
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: Anthony917]
    #14001250 - 02/21/11 01:00 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

Anthony917 said:
Quote:

Rabidbaboon said:
You guys are bold for posting pics of girlfriends. That shit could come back and bite you in the ass :uhoh:




Wow...wow, this girl isn't his girlfriend. Therefore I think it's absolutely appropriate so we, as the shroomery community, can pass our judgement down to the OP.



Whatever man, I have seen past shroomerites catch shit over doing things of that nature.
I'm just dropping some advice, he doesn't have to take it.


--------------------
Aaa...E I O Uuu...A E I O Uuu..A E I O uh Uuu..
*Cough* *Cough*
Ooo...U E I O Aaa...U E I Aaa..A E I O Uuuuu...

At first sight, The Perfection of Wisdom is bewildering, full of paradox and apparent irrationality.


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Invisiblekoraks
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: benzod]
    #14001255 - 02/21/11 01:00 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Well, there's a recognizable situation...
Dating a sober girl...
- ...didn't help me kick any habits, although I kinda hoped it would. I primarily fell for the short skirts she wore though, so no real harm done there.
- ...lasted for a quite a while, actually; we lasted for four or five years, don't rightly remember. Her having hung around potheads for years did help a lot though.
- ...ultimately didn't work out. After a couple of years, she got sort of serious, like in buying a house and getting a litter o'kids and all, and that just didn't really work for me. And she thought I was sort of a worthless pothead in a way too, which ultimately I didn't want to (couldn't) give up for her.

We had a lot of fun, and she was really sweet and all, but it just didn't last. No regrets though, it had ran its course, and we still get along real'good. So by all means, go for it, and see where you end up. Might as well enjoy the whole process :wink:


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Re: Dating a sober girl? *DELETED* *DELETED* [Re: koraks]
    #14001281 - 02/21/11 01:04 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Post deleted by shaos

Reason for deletion: deleted



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OfflineAcaterpillar
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: Galvie_Flu]
    #14001299 - 02/21/11 01:07 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

centrum said:
1 word, NO! lol seriously.

If you guys cant be equals on that level it will turn to shit.  She will eventually move on because she cant get high all the time, she will be looking for sex behind your back as your looking to get high, thats a fact, she will turn to a caniving plotting bitch, leave now while you can.



Those are some pretty bold assumptions about the character of the girl in question. She sounds like she has a stronger moral fiber than that.
Jaded from past experience much?


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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: Acaterpillar]
    #14001327 - 02/21/11 01:11 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

yeah, its pretty obvious isn't it. Actually I didnt even have time to go thru the whole post, but it sounds like the girl in question may be above the bar, but I always like be prepared for shitty girls who are liars and take advantage of men.


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Offlinefreeskierpj
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: enthiangenic]
    #14001360 - 02/21/11 01:16 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

enthiangenic said:
Maybe she will be good for you. You said you'd like to lessen the amount of alcohol and weed you use, so maybe she can be the catalyst to bring about a happier life style. And if it doesn't work out well it's just some more memories. Life is about experience after all.

I think love is the most powerful psychedelic there is...because it can last a lifetime. And just like a powerful trip, love will leave a deep impression on you forever.




This...

From my experience though it didn't work out. It caused a lot of problems and ended up with a lot of lying and me living a double life (sober around her, intoxicated with the buddies) and hating myself for that and that drove me deeper to my intoxicating lifestyle and ended up with me in rehab...if you'd like me to go more in depth I can but I'd rather leave it at that...

Just stating my experience. I hope it works out for you as it may but from my experience it didn't and I found my current girlfriend who does do drugs and things are working wonderfully with her.


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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: freeskierpj]
    #14001521 - 02/21/11 01:41 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Do you have any idea of her perception/opinion on drugs and alcohol?  I think that will be the main issue, not so much whether she drinks or does any drugs herself.


Edited by nicolerc (02/21/11 01:41 PM)


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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: Galvie_Flu]
    #14002149 - 02/21/11 03:20 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

centrum said:
She will eventually move on because she cant get high all the time, she will be looking for sex behind your back as your looking to get high, thats a fact, she will turn to a caniving plotting bitch,



If she was one to begin with, then why yes, this relationship will definitely reinforce that trait. But rest assured that there are actually sweet girls out there with warm characters and more on their mind than getting laid by muscular sex gods. You should try one sometime. Or leave 'em all for me, that's alright as well :wink:


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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: nicechrisman]
    #14002243 - 02/21/11 03:37 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

I've been dating a sober girl lately too. She wasn't always sober, she drank and did meth very heavily in high school and then cleaned up. Now the only psychoactives she's willing to use are coffee and cigarettes.

She claims not to mind if I drink or do drugs around her; I usually don't, because it makes me feel like a fiend. But there is something very peculiar about our interactions that I can't quite put my finger on.


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Enlil said:
You really are the worst kind of person.



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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: Sophistic Radiance]
    #14002829 - 02/21/11 05:31 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

well, date is canceled for tonight. I'm gonna take you guys' advice.

Just kidding- canceled cuz she's sick with a cold. I almost canceled for the same reason. I'm gonna go see her art exhibition on Sat night though, and we're gonna reschedule our date for another time.


--------------------
"Cosmic Love is absolutelely ruthless and highly indifferent:
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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: nicechrisman]
    #14002918 - 02/21/11 05:50 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

As long as she can accept you and you can accept her... I don't see a problem.

Alcohol and marijuana are pretty widely accepted too.
It's not like you're a (insert addictive drug) addict going out with a sober person.

Colds suck.


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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: Sophistic Radiance]
    #14003201 - 02/21/11 06:46 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

Tchan909 said:
I've been dating a sober girl lately too. She wasn't always sober, she drank and did meth very heavily in high school and then cleaned up. Now the only psychoactives she's willing to use are coffee and cigarettes.

She claims not to mind if I drink or do drugs around her; I usually don't, because it makes me feel like a fiend. But there is something very peculiar about our interactions that I can't quite put my finger on.




Could it be that she looks down on you?


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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: Senor_Doobie]
    #14003220 - 02/21/11 06:48 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

Senor_Doobie said:
Quote:

Tchan909 said:
I've been dating a sober girl lately too. She wasn't always sober, she drank and did meth very heavily in high school and then cleaned up. Now the only psychoactives she's willing to use are coffee and cigarettes.

She claims not to mind if I drink or do drugs around her; I usually don't, because it makes me feel like a fiend. But there is something very peculiar about our interactions that I can't quite put my finger on.




Could it be that she looks down on you?




It's possible, but I doubt it. I do drugs, but I've also never blacked-out in school or been hooked on crystal meth like she has. I think it just has to do with the fact that I'm so used to altered states that I take them for granted whereas she legitimately sees them as a personal threat. I'm pretty sure she respects me and my drug use, but it is a different frame of reference. :shrug:


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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: Sophistic Radiance]
    #14003244 - 02/21/11 06:52 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

Word, I was just curious.


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"America: Fuck yeah!" -- Alexthegreat

“Nothing can now be believed which is seen in a newspaper. Truth itself becomes suspicious by being put into that polluted vehicle. The real extent of this state of misinformation is known only to those who are in situations to confront facts within their knowledge with the lies of the day.”  -- Thomas Jefferson

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The press takes [Trump] literally, but not seriously; his supporters take him seriously, but not literally. --Salena Zeto (9/23/16)


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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: Sophistic Radiance]
    #14003301 - 02/21/11 07:00 PM (12 years, 11 months ago)

in my experience, people take on things they do or don't do as identity statements. often, when someone has made a conscious decision to abstain from drugs, meat, etc. those things become an identity statement.

the whole identity statement is often the same with folks who do thangs (drugs, etc.).

the real key is to find someone who has made their personal lifestyle decisions and is comfortable and non-judgmental of other peoples lifestyle choices whether they agree with them or not.

i guess i'm rambling on about finding a mature person to share life with.


--------------------


"We are all intoxicated. We were born into an insane asylum, a world crazy-making. We believe what we see and hear. The real myth is the myth of sanity, of rationality: it's a disease that is eating away at the earth. All the poisons flow from our denial. We deny madness, we forget our crimes, we dismember the corpse, we imprison our children. We need poison to poison the poison, to remember the sacred nature of intoxication, the green body of the young god." ~ Dale Pendell


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Re: Dating a sober girl? [Re: gerryjarcia]
    #14080404 - 03/07/11 11:07 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

gerryjarcia said:
in my experience, people take on things they do or don't do as identity statements. often, when someone has made a conscious decision to abstain from drugs, meat, etc. those things become an identity statement.

the whole identity statement is often the same with folks who do thangs (drugs, etc.).

the real key is to find someone who has made their personal lifestyle decisions and is comfortable and non-judgmental of other peoples lifestyle choices whether they agree with them or not.

i guess i'm rambling on about finding a mature person to share life with.



well, I certainly hope it can be like that.

We hung out about a week ago, but I wouldn't really consider it a date. I carpooled with her down to the Seattle Flower and Garden show along with a friend of her mother's. It wasn't really a planned thing, more last minute, so I'm not trying to read into the whole mother's friend thing. They had already planned on going down there together before I decided to go with.

We are going out tonight though. I think I'll take her out for sushi cuz I know she likes it, she doesn't eat meat except fish, and I think sushi is kinda a special thing. I know a good place that's got nice ambiance and all that jazz.

Then we are going to have a game night. Not sure what yet. She likes pool, and I am pitifully bad at it. I like darts but she feels the same about them. We were talking maybe airhocky or bowling.

Hopefully it will be fun. I'm sure it will.


--------------------
"Cosmic Love is absolutelely ruthless and highly indifferent:
it teaches its lessons whether you like/dislike them or not."

John C. Lily

 


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