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doses
Obsessive Purist
Registered: 11/21/10
Posts: 1,049
Last seen: 9 years, 7 months
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Re: A life spent intoxicated [Re: laserpig]
#13775774 - 01/12/11 04:10 PM (13 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
laserpig said: Since I was a child, reality has always felt low-resolution to me. Like the same way you feel when you fish out your N64 and play the original Super Smash Brothers. It just isn't convincing, it isn't gripping, the whole thing seems flat. I doubt I'm the only person who feels this way, though maybe I'm the only one who'd describe it like this. But anyway, that's probably why I do drugs.
I generally agree, very well put.
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BlueB0Y
Soo Mused
Registered: 09/29/10
Posts: 42
Last seen: 10 years, 1 month
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Re: A life spent intoxicated [Re: mellowparty]
#13775784 - 01/12/11 04:12 PM (13 years, 2 months ago) |
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I completely understand manEE, at least i think lol. Some years back, one thing lead to another and before I knew it, I'd slipped into the rave scene.
Before this chapter in my life, I'd smoked ALOT but besides drinking I hadn't really done much else... and then very occasionally at a party or w.e. I'd do something else like vikes, salvia, CCC's, or some other random stuff that popped up at the most random times.
But when I fell into this scene I realized a completely different existence... I watched in awe the first time I went to one of these events lol. People everywhere, some seemed cool, others looked crazy, some were hott, some not soo much. But the one thing they all had in common was there passion for drugs, music and partyin! What a coincidence, MEE TOO! But this was the extreme. It was a 420 rave, and the ventilation was poor. This left everyone hot and very smokey. With the bathrooms packed to capacity, a line formed against the wall filled with overheating teens and young adults feeling the effects of all the X they'd popped earlier. Everything was enhanced By the roaring bass, and blinding lights... pure energy was everywhere. I continued to observe, Acidd... Mollie... K... everything I'd never heard of, being consumed like it was the end of the world. This was crazy!
Around the wee hours of the morning, it all ended... or so i thought. People began making there way out of the dilapidated building somewhere in the middle of Chicago, trying to remember where they parked or how to get back home. ...Soo I found the group I came with which consisted of my 2 friends (all first time ravers)... and then acouple people that were regulars. As we all got back into our cars, phones started buzzing and people were trying to get the location of the "after party"! ...WTF?! Next thing you know its six something in the morning and were making our way to this "location".
When we got into the vicinity, alott of faces i had seen earlier started to pop up, wide eyed walking down the street, or popping outta cars. I think it gave everyone the sense that, we were like the survivors that made it from the night before lol. Everyone was still going strong feeling good, and it didnt even matter if you'd never seen these people in your life. All you had to do was start talking to them... and thats how it all started.
Before u know it, your calling some of these people back, making friends and going too all these different event all the time. At this point my initial fear of drugs such as psychedelics had been shattered. I saw so many people do it everyday in crazy amounts, that i figured, I'd be fine if I did it too... and i was ^_^.
Before i knew it... I'd tried everything from 2CB to DMT... and because of the people i was hanging around and their lifestyles, I started doing this type of stuff all the time. After awhile i remember telling my friend that it felt like i could hardly remember the last time i was sober. Then we laughed about it, and talked about that first rave we went to and how things sorta just changed from their.
This Went on for quite awhile... until Time eventually lead to an Epiphany... "The rave scene is selling you a fake dream... and its lovely"
Too me it seems When you spend all ur time in that world. ...you stop growing in this one.
How are you supposed to maintain a Job if you stay up to 5 everyday, come in looking like shit and probably on an empty stomach?
How are you supposed to mature, and even think about raising a family, ur kids would be fuk'd!
How can you function rationally if you perception is always altered?
How do you have the energy to maintain healthy relationships with the people you truly love, on drugs or not?
...Its fun doing all that stuff dont get me wrong. But i dont believe that lifestyle is any more responsible, then driving drunk.
Im not saying "dont do drugs", but i am saying that if its negatively effecting your life... i.e. your just not happy with your life and you feel like its a shallow existence and you wonder if life is ever goanna be more... its probably because your growth is suffering in this world, because your (for lack of a better word) "wasting" it in a dream. You know what you have to do if you want change... but you really have to do it, and you will see results. im 21 now and all i can say is, life is looking up
I dont know if that really relates to your question/story ...but thats mine and i hope you can find some truth in it.
-------------------- d[-_-]b
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gerryjarcia
biophiliac
Registered: 05/29/10
Posts: 1,889
Loc: the woods
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Re: A life spent intoxicated [Re: Xpatriot]
#13775786 - 01/12/11 04:13 PM (13 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Xpatriot said: I know lots of people on here spend a large portion of their life buzzed off some substance, i know i do. Tons of people I know in real life hardly go a day without being on something. It makes me think about whats so wrong with my reality? Why is it that it seems impossible to live a sober life? Are things actually better in a medicated state of mind?
i've thought a lot about this as well. i've dramatically cut back on any "drugs" i put in my body. the thing that prompted me to even begin assessing personal levels of consumption came about while on some beautiful shroom trips.
for me it came to down to the question of what was the purpose of altering my mind with a substance. i'm also more inclined to the "spiritual" side of the psychedelic experience and i wanted to be very aware of my intentions before going into any trip.
it is also important to keep in mind that anything you (do or don't) put into your body is altering your conscious to some varying degree. people fast to have spiritual experiences, or simply to alter their conscience. so by not putting something into their body they are going into a different mental state.
It is pretty interesting to realize that the simple act of eating food is a mind altering experience.
i appreciate your story, thanks for sharing it.
-------------------- "We are all intoxicated. We were born into an insane asylum, a world crazy-making. We believe what we see and hear. The real myth is the myth of sanity, of rationality: it's a disease that is eating away at the earth. All the poisons flow from our denial. We deny madness, we forget our crimes, we dismember the corpse, we imprison our children. We need poison to poison the poison, to remember the sacred nature of intoxication, the green body of the young god." ~ Dale Pendell
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starfire_xes
I Am 'They'
Registered: 10/24/09
Posts: 21,590
Loc: Dallas with all the assho...
Last seen: 8 months, 29 days
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Re: A life spent intoxicated [Re: Xpatriot]
#13775816 - 01/12/11 04:17 PM (13 years, 2 months ago) |
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I spent a large portion of my life not buzzed on substances. Things are better medicated.
-------------------- [/url][/url] IF THE NEIGHBORS COMPLAIN BECAUSE THE MUSIC'S TOO LOUD, TURN IT UP SO YOU CAN'T HEAR THEM BITCH
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Envix
Avoidant Disorder
Registered: 11/04/08
Posts: 18,206
Last seen: 11 months, 21 days
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Quote:
starfire_xes said: I spent a large portion of my life not buzzed on substances. Things are better medicated.
maybe u werent doin enough fun thangs when u were sober
-------------------- smack a hoe out this dimension continue my ascension -bhad bhabie rip. todcasil, acid sloth, st1llnox, zappaisgod, big worm (sketch), tim b
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TheTreesHaveEyes
Stranger
Registered: 12/01/10
Posts: 156
Last seen: 12 years, 1 month
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Re: A life spent intoxicated [Re: Envix]
#13775933 - 01/12/11 04:45 PM (13 years, 2 months ago) |
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This is why I'm taking (at least) a month of full sobriety. I've lived the last two years without ever going more than a few days sober, and those days were not by my choice.
I'm actually enjoying my sober life a ton. I think it's really fun. Plus I find that with a lot of meditation and the right mindset I feel really high all the time anyways.
I feel like enjoying sobriety just makes drugs that much better. You can actually come down from a trip and be content not having more. Plus learning to astral project and lucid dream have put more than enough trippiness into my daily life, no drugs required.
That being said, I really look forward to taking drugs again, but not in an attached sort of way.
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tospace
Registered: 12/27/09
Posts: 2,585
Last seen: 11 years, 3 months
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Re: A life spent intoxicated [Re: Envix]
#13776068 - 01/12/11 05:12 PM (13 years, 2 months ago) |
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Well to me using drugs that make you less productive all the time is a really bad thing. I'm talking about mary jane. I feel like a wasted so much of my life smoking weed all day when it wasn't even fun. I feel like I could be further in life and less behind in school it wasn't for weed.
I like psychedelics as an alternative to what I'd normally be doing alone at night like playing video games. Hopefully It become an all day activity, like with weed.
Adderall is something I would be ok with taking all the time because I have add and it makes me more productive.
Socializing on the after glow of dxm some how helped me allot with my social anxiety. Plus those days I'd so loving and happy.
Some drugs just make me feel like a better person and so aware of every ones feelings around me and some drugs make me unaware and depressed.
-------------------- a teenage girl looking for guidance
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akira_akuma
Φύσις κρύπτεσθαι ὕψιστος φιλεῖ
Registered: 08/28/09
Posts: 82,455
Loc: Onypeirophóros
Last seen: 4 years, 2 months
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Re: A life spent intoxicated [Re: Envix]
#13776134 - 01/12/11 05:26 PM (13 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Envix said:
Quote:
starfire_xes said: I spent a large portion of my life not buzzed on substances. Things are better medicated.
maybe u werent doin enough fun thangs when u were sober
what fun stuff? is there alot of fun stuff to do without getting shitfaced, around your town?
cause in my neck of the woods... if you aren't going out somewhere shallow and depraved, then you are getting drunk and going out somewhere shallow and depraved.
Quote:
tospace said: Socializing on the after glow of dxm some how helped me allot with my social anxiety. Plus those days I'd so loving and happy.
Some drugs just make me feel like a better person and so aware of every ones feelings around me and some drugs make me unaware and depressed.
i somehow don't believe that you using different drugs for perceived effects, is any different then... well, what i just said.
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Sophistic Radiance
Free sVs!
Registered: 07/11/06
Posts: 43,135
Loc: Center of the Universe
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Re: A life spent intoxicated [Re: doses]
#13776149 - 01/12/11 05:28 PM (13 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
doses said: It sounds a lot like the typical realization that comes from a panic attack.
The real conclusion to walk away from that with is that drugs are almost never the true cause of or solution to any problems.
But I walked through that entire train of thought you described like 5,000 times during that tasty five hour panic attack of mine.
I think this is extremely true.
As somebody else said, drugs are a part of life, not an alternative to it. I think a distinction like that would be unhealthy.
If you want to cut down, that's perfectly fine, and you should do that, but don't kid yourself into thinking that being high is an alternate reality.
BTW, psychedelics have, at least for me, always had the effect of making sober life seem far brighter, more colorful, and more fun-filled...
-------------------- Enlil said: You really are the worst kind of person.
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dutchmushroom
mushroom invader
Registered: 08/02/06
Posts: 1,393
Loc: Outer Space
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Re: A life spent intoxicated [Re: Xpatriot]
#13776178 - 01/12/11 05:35 PM (13 years, 2 months ago) |
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Hell brother you are just at that point in your life, Soon you will understand Sayings and metaphors and advice that has been given to you which you never understood Before.
Quote:
I feel like subscribing to a certain culture, like being a hippy, narrows your mind, makes you live within rules you cant define or understand. I feel blind like a child, like people are so stupid, they cant grasp how quick their life can end. i just want to live and feel like I keep getting caught up in society and a specific veiwpoint, that narrow veiwpoint brings saddness, a dampened life.
THat Sounds Like a rather HIPPY thing to say!! BTW get a hair cut, You're Young and white, Stop making yourself a minority, The world is your Oysta
-------------------- "Comes a time when the blind man takes your hand says: don't you see? Gotta make it some how, on the dreams you still believe, Don't give it up, you've got an empty cup, only love can fill, only love can fill" < Grateful Dead! The bus came by and I got on, and thats when it all began GROWLIGHT KIT, 250w HPS Digital ballast, + Enhanced Spectrum bulb and Reflector Sale Or Trade!
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Bodhi of Ankou
*alternate opinion blocks path*
Registered: 06/02/09
Posts: 24,778
Loc: Soviet Canukistan
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Ive been sober the past couple months,at times It is indeed quite boring.
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Envix
Avoidant Disorder
Registered: 11/04/08
Posts: 18,206
Last seen: 11 months, 21 days
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-------------------- smack a hoe out this dimension continue my ascension -bhad bhabie rip. todcasil, acid sloth, st1llnox, zappaisgod, big worm (sketch), tim b
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trip forever
Stranger
Registered: 08/21/09
Posts: 5,873
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Re: A life spent intoxicated [Re: tospace]
#13776220 - 01/12/11 05:43 PM (13 years, 2 months ago) |
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How many times do I have to explain this.
I DONT HAVE TO TAKE DRUGS TO ENJOY REALITY, BUT THEY ENHANCE(MAKE) REALITY BETTER.
That why I do them.
I already enjoy reality sober, but I enjoy it more while intoxicated, then again I'm not intoxicated every second of the day, probably 3 days I'm high all day of the week.
--------------------
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destructo_low
Oh yeah!
Registered: 10/07/08
Posts: 4,328
Last seen: 10 years, 10 months
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Quote:
trip forever said: probably 3 days I'm high all day of the week.
I believe you.
-------------------- There is a molecule for every purpose. There are only actions and reactions. Cut out the middle men. Everything I say is a lie.
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LobsterSauce
Registered: 11/09/08
Posts: 19,884
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I spend daytime sober during the week and only smoke at night and drink/smoke at the weekends usually.
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doses
Obsessive Purist
Registered: 11/21/10
Posts: 1,049
Last seen: 9 years, 7 months
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Quote:
destructo_low said:
Quote:
trip forever said: probably 3 days I'm high all day of the week.
I believe you.
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Natorade
LsDmThC
Registered: 02/18/10
Posts: 1,568
Loc: WI
Last seen: 3 years, 26 days
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i was a daily pot smoker throughout all of 2010, but as of right now i have not smoked since january 1st. and quite frankly, ive never felt better. i definitely wouldnt say weed is the only variable, but it has certainly helped me clear my mind and allowed me to reexamine myself to see what was really going on. i realized i was just constantly living in a fade, always trying to be as distant from everything as possible- my thoughts, emotions, attention, friends/family, everything. i drowned everything out, mainly because i did just want to escape it all, but i let it consume me and never even considered the thought that it might be having a negative impact. thats not to say ill never smoke again. hell, i know i will. but im definitely going to keep it in moderation and not fall back into that cycle. and honestly, this was the last thing i couldve ever seen myself posting in a million years but im sure glad i can.
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Arden
לנשום
Registered: 09/01/08
Posts: 7,666
Loc: Α & Ω
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Re: A life spent intoxicated [Re: Natorade]
#13776534 - 01/12/11 06:42 PM (13 years, 2 months ago) |
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Psychedelics are one component of our many experiences. They shouldn't be all-consuming regarding an identity, a sense of purpose, etc.
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CarnivalBarker
wizard
Registered: 04/19/10
Posts: 2,668
Last seen: 11 years, 4 months
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Re: A life spent intoxicated [Re: Envix]
#13776558 - 01/12/11 06:46 PM (13 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Envix said: i wouldnt know what to do with all my free time if i was always sober
make life less boring then we can talk about phasing out the dr00gx
I think the only thing that can make life less boring is yourself. If you find life boring, do something to make it interesting besides drugs. You have a lot of free time because you choose to have that amount of free time. If you really wanted to, you could have only an hour of free time a day, or all day could be free time.
I've definitely found the more I'm doin' thangs, the less drugs I do, and the more I'm not doin' thangs, I'm high more often.
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Envix
Avoidant Disorder
Registered: 11/04/08
Posts: 18,206
Last seen: 11 months, 21 days
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Re: A life spent intoxicated [Re: Arden]
#13776564 - 01/12/11 06:47 PM (13 years, 2 months ago) |
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limitation is a cycle as well. hell everythang is cyclical
-------------------- smack a hoe out this dimension continue my ascension -bhad bhabie rip. todcasil, acid sloth, st1llnox, zappaisgod, big worm (sketch), tim b
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