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French Bashing - Comedic Relief
    #1364913 -

I thought this was funny, meant for comedic purposes only so don'y get your panties in a bundle...hell never mind feel free to get pissed.
:smirk:

From an Oklahoma Sooners message board...thoughts on the French...


"France has neither winter nor summer nor morals. Apart from these drawbacks it is a fine country. France has usually been governed by prostitutes." --Mark Twain


"I would rather have a German division in front of me than a French one behind me." -- General George S. Patton


"Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without your accordion." --Norman Schwartzkopf


"We can stand here like the French, or we can do something about it." -- Marge Simpson


"As far as I'm concerned, war always means failure." --Jacques Chirac, President of France


"The only time France wants us to go to war is when the German Army is sitting in Paris sipping coffee." -- Regis Philbin


"The French are a smallish, monkey-looking bunch and not dressed any better, on average, than the citizens of Baltimore. True, you can sit outside in Paris and drink little cups of coffee, but why this is more stylish than sitting inside and drinking large glasses of whiskey I don't know." -- P.J O'Rourke (1989)


"You know, the French remind me a little bit of an aging actress of the 1940s who was still trying to dine out on her looks but doesn't have the face for it." --John McCain, U.S. Senator from Arizona


"You know why the French don't want to bomb Saddam Hussein? Because he hates America, he loves mistresses and wears a beret. He is French, people." --Conan O'Brien


"I don't know why people are surprised that France won't help us get Saddam out of Iraq. After all, France wouldn't help us get the Germans out of France!" --Jay Leno


"The last time the French asked for 'more proof' it came marching into Paris under a German flag." --David Letterman


"The only war the French have won is the French Revolution, and that's because they were fighting themselves." -- BKSooner



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America....FUCK YEAH!!!

Words of Wisdom: Individual Rights BEFORE Collective Rights

"The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." -- Thomas Jefferson

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Re: French Bashing - Comedic Relief [Re: Innvertigo]
    #1364950 -

Thank you Inn!


That was hysterical!  :grin: :grin: :grin:

Wee Wee Bon Ami!  Toots Sweet!

How does a French woman hold her liquor?

By the ears so he can't get away!

:grin: :grin: :grin: :grin:

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Re: French Bashing - Comedic Relief [Re: Innvertigo]
    #1364956 -

he he...some pretty good ones in there... :grin:


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"Life has never been weird enough for my liking"

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Re: French Bashing - Comedic Relief [Re: Innvertigo]
    #1365102 -

Thank you, that made my day!


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"I hate having to pick between the lesser of two evils. But I'm glad Obama was elected. McCain was another war monger. I'd rather deal with our country going into debt than trying to take on afghanistan...oh wait FUCK!" - Fungus_tao

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Re: French Bashing - Comedic Relief [Re: AislingGheal]
    #1365106 -

my pleasure...


--------------------

America....FUCK YEAH!!!

Words of Wisdom: Individual Rights BEFORE Collective Rights

"The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." -- Thomas Jefferson

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Re: French Bashing - Comedic Relief [Re: Innvertigo]
    #1365481 -

Simpsons:

Kent Brockman: This just in, tensions continue to mount between Springfield and France over Mayor Quimby's now famous frog's legs joke! The French president has threatened swift and massive retaliation if he doesn't recieve an immediate apology.

Homer: [annoyed] Stupid frog.

Marge: you know how unpredictable the French are. One minute they're kissing a woman's hand, the next, they're chopping off her head! What if they start a war?

Comic Book guy:(Dramatic) But Aquaman, you cannot marry a woman without gills. You're from two different worlds! (the french missile closes in on him) Oohh, I've wasted my life...

:grin: :grin: :grin:


--------------------

America....FUCK YEAH!!!

Words of Wisdom: Individual Rights BEFORE Collective Rights

"The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." -- Thomas Jefferson

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Re: French Bashing - Comedic Relief [Re: Innvertigo]
    #1365518 -

Hahaha nice.

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Re: French Bashing - Comedic Relief [Re: Anonymous]
    #1366635 -

I went to France, and it was way cooler than the US.

The people were nice, the food was great, and there were no unsightly fat people, save for american tourists.


--------------------
"I have no valid complaint against hustlers. No rational bitch. But the act of selling is repulsive to me. I harbor a secret urge to whack a salesman in the face, crack his teeth and put red bumps around his eyes." -Hunter S Thompson
http://phluck.is-after.us

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Re: French Bashing - Comedic Relief [Re: Innvertigo]
    #1366916 -

Why does France have tree lined streets?

Because the Germans like to march in the shade......

On a different note, did not the founding fathers get an awefull lot of ideas from the French with all those crazy LIBERTY ideas and stuff?

Where did we get that statue of Liberty thing? Hmmmm.....


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Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.

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Re: French Bashing - Comedic Relief [Re: upupup]
    #1367511 -

Quote:
On a different note, did not the founding fathers get an awefull lot of ideas from the French with all those crazy LIBERTY ideas and stuff?

Where did we get that statue of Liberty thing? Hmmmm.....


how can i put this in terms that even you would inderstand? hmmm..oh yeah: WHO CARES!!??


--------------------

America....FUCK YEAH!!!

Words of Wisdom: Individual Rights BEFORE Collective Rights

"The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." -- Thomas Jefferson

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Re: French Bashing - Comedic Relief *DELETED* [Re: Innvertigo]
    #1367689 -

Post deleted by Scvotto_Turellskey


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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"They think we are retarded - they are retarded." - The Sultan of Spin.

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Re: French Bashing - Comedic Relief [Re: Scvotto_Turellskey]
    #1367691 -

woops...wrong link... ment this one:

http://www.boston.com/dailynews/070/wash/French_fries_get_new_name_in_H:.shtml


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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"They think we are retarded - they are retarded." - The Sultan of Spin.

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Re: French Bashing - Comedic Relief [Re: Scvotto_Turellskey]
    #1367694 -

So how about deleting the wrong one?


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You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity by legislating the wealthy out of prosperity. What one person receives without working for another person must work for without receiving. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for that my dear friend is the beginning of the end of any nation. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it. ~ Adrian Rogers

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Re: French Bashing - Comedic Relief [Re: upupup]
    #1367799 -

Quote:
On a different note, did not the founding fathers get an awefull lot of ideas from the French with all those crazy LIBERTY ideas and stuff?


The intellectual roots of the American experiment come from several different sources, including the Bible, French philosopher Montesquieu, English jurist William Blackstone, English philosopher John Locke, English common Law and The Magna Carta. There are even significant ideas borrowed from the Iroquois Confederacy (the so-called 'Nobel Savages').


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To call humans 'rational beings' does injustice to the term, 'rational.'  Humans are capable of rational thought, but it is not their essence.  Humans are animals, beasts with complex brains.  Humans, more often than not, utilize their cerebrum to rationalize what their primal instincts, their preconceived notions, and their emotional desires have presented as goals - humans are rationalizing beings.

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Re: French Bashing - Comedic Relief [Re: Phluck]
    #1368539 -

ROFL! Phluck that was great!
About all these things surrounding France's not going to war. Wouldn't most of you not want to have a war in the first place?


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"Jesus won't you touch me, come into my heart, where the hell are you, when the burning starts? I'm using my fingers instead of words, I'm using my fingers instead of words!" Christian Death

"Two sounds are better than one, do the techno man!"

Edited by MushroomMan420 (03/12/03 07:42 AM)

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Re: French Bashing - Comedic Relief [Re: MushroomMan420]
    #1368669 -

quit yer whining, this thread is intended for comedic purposes only...try to be funny :smirk:


--------------------

America....FUCK YEAH!!!

Words of Wisdom: Individual Rights BEFORE Collective Rights

"The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." -- Thomas Jefferson

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Re: French Bashing - Comedic Relief [Re: Innvertigo]
    #1368825 -

I thought they were funny, but, I mean we could be joking about other things rather than war...  :crazy:

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Re: French Bashing - Comedic Relief [Re: angryshroom]
    #1369014 -

Canadians?


--------------------

America....FUCK YEAH!!!

Words of Wisdom: Individual Rights BEFORE Collective Rights

"The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." -- Thomas Jefferson

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Re: French Bashing - Comedic Relief [Re: Innvertigo]
    #1369210 -

Does that mean you didn't find my tree joke funny?

I also happen to think the most obviose symbol of american liberty has some kind of status here eh?

what would all the pics of the after affects of 911 be without having that green statue in the foreground be after all......???


--------------------
Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.

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Re: French Bashing - Comedic Relief [Re: Phluck]
    #1369253 -

Quote:
I went to France, and it was way cooler than the US.

The people were nice, the food was great, and there were no unsightly fat people, save for american tourists. 




The people were nice  -- you missed going to Paris or you speak French well

the food was great -- true

there were no unsightly fat people save for american tourists.-- could be Germans ya know   :grin:   


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<~>Our truest life is when we are in dreams awake <~>

Edited by grib (03/12/03 11:45 AM)

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