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OfflineAmber_Glow
Sat Chit Anand

Registered: 09/02/02
Posts: 1,543
Last seen: 4 years, 3 months
Is it your soul mate if she cheated on you?
    #1364879 - 03/11/03 06:43 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

Let's say you've found someone who you love a lot and thought was perfect. Let's say you've had a relationship with them, for over a year, and you think they are the sweetest thing in the world, and then they have sex with someone else.

With someone who you love so much and feel so deeply about, what do you do when that person cheats on you? Can this be overlooked?

Or does it have to be the end?


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Anonymous

Re: Is it your soul mate if she cheated on you? [Re: Amber_Glow]
    #1364895 - 03/11/03 06:49 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

It can be overlooked.  But it might have to be overlooked many times. :frown:

Soulmates do not cheat.

A true soulmate doesn't usually know other people exist in the same way as their soulmate.

Better luck in the future. :wink:


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InvisibleSkorpivoMusterion
Livin in theTwilight Zone...
 User Gallery

Registered: 01/30/03
Posts: 9,946
Loc: You can't spell fungus wi...
Re: Is it your soul mate if she cheated on you? [Re: Amber_Glow]
    #1364917 - 03/11/03 07:01 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

maybe soulmates make mistakes too? we ALL are human after all arent we? I mean dont get me wrong, I'm not justifying it by any means, but people DO make mistakes...sometimes there are just moments of weakness which we cant control...maybe you could consider this a test of the strength of your bond....but at the same time, use some common sense....if this is re-occuring problem...then it's obviously not "THE ONE" for you....


--------------------
Coffee should be black as hell, strong as death, and sweet as love.


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InvisibleEvolving
Resident Cynic

Registered: 10/01/02
Posts: 5,385
Loc: Apt #6, The Village
Re: Is it your soul mate if she cheated on you? [Re: Amber_Glow]
    #1364937 - 03/11/03 07:07 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

Soul mates are not perfect, they are someone that you share a deep loving attachment with that is eternal.

Sex and love are not synonymous.

It is important to understand the intent of another, particularly those that you love.

We are all learning while we are here, we all make mistakes. Some mistakes can and should be forgiven (I am not saying this is one of these things - it may not be a mistake, I do not have enough information to make that assessment).

Sometimes what we may first perceive as the end may be a new beginning with a deeper understanding and the realization that we have opportunity for spiritual growth and self actualization.


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To call humans 'rational beings' does injustice to the term, 'rational.'  Humans are capable of rational thought, but it is not their essence.  Humans are animals, beasts with complex brains.  Humans, more often than not, utilize their cerebrum to rationalize what their primal instincts, their preconceived notions, and their emotional desires have presented as goals - humans are rationalizing beings.


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InvisibleSwami
Eggshell Walker

Registered: 01/19/00
Posts: 15,413
Loc: In the hen house
Re: Is it your soul mate if she cheated on you? [Re: Evolving]
    #1364966 - 03/11/03 07:15 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

A soulmate is someone you stalk after they break up with you. Your will and deep attachment is stronger than any restraining order...


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The proof is in the pudding.


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InvisibleEvolving
Resident Cynic

Registered: 10/01/02
Posts: 5,385
Loc: Apt #6, The Village
Re: Is it your soul mate if she cheated on you? [Re: Swami]
    #1364987 - 03/11/03 07:21 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

Hey Swami, everybody like some ass, but not everybody likes a smart ass. :wink:


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To call humans 'rational beings' does injustice to the term, 'rational.'  Humans are capable of rational thought, but it is not their essence.  Humans are animals, beasts with complex brains.  Humans, more often than not, utilize their cerebrum to rationalize what their primal instincts, their preconceived notions, and their emotional desires have presented as goals - humans are rationalizing beings.


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OfflineAmber_Glow
Sat Chit Anand

Registered: 09/02/02
Posts: 1,543
Last seen: 4 years, 3 months
Re: Is it your soul mate if she cheated on you? [Re: Evolving]
    #1365028 - 03/11/03 07:33 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

It's like I want to still be with her, but I don't know if its the best thing for me. I worry most for her.

I've always liked this song for this type of situation: Praga Kahn - Luv U Still

'...even though you scratch my soul i love you still...'


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Invisiblespud
I'm so fly.

Registered: 10/07/02
Posts: 44,410
Re: Is it your soul mate if she cheated on you? [Re: Amber_Glow]
    #1365088 - 03/11/03 08:00 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

soul mates dont exist. the thought that there is only 1 person made for you in a world were you can encounter a never ending amount is ridiculous



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OfflineAmber_Glow
Sat Chit Anand

Registered: 09/02/02
Posts: 1,543
Last seen: 4 years, 3 months
Re: Is it your soul mate if she cheated on you? [Re: spud]
    #1365097 - 03/11/03 08:04 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

Well we aren't trying to dispute soul mate business exactly.


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Invisiblespud
I'm so fly.

Registered: 10/07/02
Posts: 44,410
Re: Is it your soul mate if she cheated on you? [Re: Amber_Glow]
    #1365108 - 03/11/03 08:08 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

never said we were...


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Offlinejohnnyfive
Burning withCircles!
Registered: 07/02/02
Posts: 886
Loc: Hell
Last seen: 13 years, 1 month
Re: Is it your soul mate if she cheated on you? [Re: Amber_Glow]
    #1365244 - 03/11/03 09:04 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

Its a possiblity that sex and love are two very different things.


--------------------
And the gameshow host rings the buzzer (brrnnntt) oh and now you get a face full of face!


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Invisibletak_old
Endo Smoke

Registered: 05/31/02
Posts: 609
Loc: State of confusion
Re: Is it your soul mate if she cheated on you? [Re: johnnyfive]
    #1365280 - 03/11/03 09:20 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

Does she know you know? I think it depends on where her heart is, i know i make mistakes...and I regret them alot, and will never do them again. Thankfully most the people ive hurt have forgiven me. But thenagain ive known people who have repeated the same thing multiple times hurting loved ones dearly. I dont htink there is a black/white answer we can answer...It all depends on how you feel about her, and how you think she feels about you.


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OfflineAmber_Glow
Sat Chit Anand

Registered: 09/02/02
Posts: 1,543
Last seen: 4 years, 3 months
Re: Is it your soul mate if she cheated on you? [Re: tak_old]
    #1365579 - 03/11/03 10:46 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

She knows I know, and is the one who told me. Basically she's been professing her love and whatnot. And I do love her a lot.


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OfflineStrumpling
Neuronaut
Registered: 10/11/02
Posts: 7,571
Loc: Hyperspace
Last seen: 6 years, 1 month
Re: Is it your soul mate if she cheated on you? [Re: Amber_Glow]
    #1365661 - 03/11/03 11:10 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

forget 'er. move on.


--------------------
Insert an "I think" mentally in front of eveything I say that seems sketchy, because I certainly don't KNOW much. Also; feel free to yell at me.
In addition: SHPONGLE


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Offlinefireworks_godS
Sexy.Butt.McDanger
Male

Registered: 03/12/02
Posts: 24,851
Loc: Pandurn
Last seen: 11 days, 3 hours
Re: Is it your soul mate if she cheated on you? [Re: Amber_Glow]
    #1365669 - 03/11/03 11:12 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

It all depends on what goes on in her head. If she is your soulmate, then she is going to be honest with you, so all you have to do is ask. See if it meant anything to her (this other guy), if she loves him or was just caught up in emotion, how she feels about you, if she wants you to forgive her and continue on with her, and how sorry she feels.
If she honestly loves you and wants to stay with you, she has to realize she made the mistake and won't make it again. She would have to realize that doing this again or even being around this other guy is going to hurt you more than ever, and that if she truly loves you and wants to stay with you, then she can't be with this other guy.
If you forgive her and continue on the path with her, don't dwell on the fact that she slept with someone else, because that will just make you paranoid and insane. Use reason, and if she sleeps with him or someone else again, then it is time to leave.
Trust yourself (your head and your heart) to make the right decision. Good luck.
Peace.


--------------------
:redpanda:
If I should die this very moment
I wouldn't fear
For I've never known completeness
Like being here
Wrapped in the warmth of you
Loving every breath of you

:heartpump: :bunnyhug: :yinyang:

:yinyang: :levitate: :earth: :levitate: :yinyang:


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Anonymous

Re: Is it your soul mate if she cheated on you? [Re: Swami]
    #1365691 - 03/11/03 11:17 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

I think I agree with you here but I still keep thinking about that movie, Fatal Attraction.

We need to give this guy some solid advice.

Bro, dump her. You need to move on to the next one as fast as possible.

Next.


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Offlinemr freedom
enthusiast
Registered: 02/26/01
Posts: 232
Last seen: 12 years, 1 month
Re: Is it your soul mate if she cheated on you? [Re: Amber_Glow]
    #1365826 - 03/11/03 11:56 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

I believe some questions are in order. First, were you in an exclusive relationship?? I'm serious; at some point did either of you decide that you were in an exclusive, committed relationship?

If the answer is yes then she has broken her word, the oral agreement and the intent of the relationship.

Second, did she use a condom?? Again I am quite serious about this. If she did not, and also did not have the other sex partner show her a blood test then she has put you at serious risk for STD.

Now, this question has not been asked but ASSUMED. DId she "make a mistake"?HELL NO, not unless she was inebriated in some manner I'd say the answer is no.
What "mistake" could she have made that would lead to a PENIS IN HER VAGINA(I am assuming the portal of entry but the statement stands regardless)??? That one I don't get. It's not a "mistake" when you have sex outside of your relationship. It's either agreed, that sexual encounter's outside of the relationship are acceptable or it's not, hence a violation of the parameter's of the relationship.

SImply put, her action(s) were not a MISTAKE but a willful violation if not intended to hurt, certainly the act was committed WITHOUT regard for YOUR feelings.

If you can address these issues, come to some altered parameters of your relationship (such as this is never going to happen again; or the reverse) AND most importantly, FORGIVE her for her mistreatment of you then it's certainly worth considering a continuation of the relationship.

How you proceed is up to you and I encourage you to forgive her regardless of whether you continue your relationship. HOWEVER, do NOT forgive on the basis of it's a MISTAKE. Although it WAS an error in judgement, action it was, outside of inebriation, a CALCULATED ACTION WITHOUT REGARD TO YOU OUR YOUR RELATIONSHIP.


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OfflineMarkostheGnostic
Elder
Male User Gallery

Registered: 12/10/99
Posts: 13,037
Loc: South Florida
Last seen: 7 hours, 10 minutes
Re: Is it your soul mate if she cheated on you? [Re: Amber_Glow]
    #1366024 - 03/11/03 01:09 PM (14 years, 3 months ago)

One's soulmate would no sooner hurt the other, than hurt him/herself. Therefore, one who cheats is being destructive of the relationship. Perhaps if both parties are self-destructive, or suicidal, then it makes [twisted] sense that there is cheating going on. But then we are taking about sick soulmates, so the term soulmate becomes absurd. No, soulmates do not cheat on one another. They do not lie, deceive or hurt the other. The spirit of soulmates is love, not just eros, but agape - selfless compassion.


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γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself


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OfflineCockyMandrill
addict

Registered: 01/31/03
Posts: 404
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Re: Is it your soul mate if she cheated on you? [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #1366327 - 03/11/03 03:00 PM (14 years, 3 months ago)

A soulmate would not do anything that would hurt their soulmate as much as being unfaithful. I could forgive my soulmate for a lot of things, but sex is too far, whos to say they wouldnt do it again.


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OfflineAmber_Glow
Sat Chit Anand

Registered: 09/02/02
Posts: 1,543
Last seen: 4 years, 3 months
Re: Is it your soul mate if she cheated on you? [Re: CockyMandrill]
    #1366378 - 03/11/03 03:19 PM (14 years, 3 months ago)

Ugh, well I am basically forgiving her anyway.

I get over things really easily. :P Its hardly been two days and I'm already over it. Maybe I am the second coming of Jesus.


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