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OfflineDrGonzo
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Registered: 01/30/03
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Compulsive Lying
    #1360043 - 03/09/03 11:01 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

I think my girlfriend maybe a compulsive liar. A mutual friend of ours told me that her brother had mentioned to him that she had a problem with lying before. I've looked all over the net, and while there is lots of information about almost every other personality disorder you can think of, there is little to nothing on compulsive lying. I was just wondering if anyone can point me in the right direction or give me some information they know about it.


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OfflineMitchnast
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Re: Compulsive Lying [Re: DrGonzo]
    #1360057 - 03/09/03 11:07 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

thats because compulsive lying is not a disorder but rather a symptom of a disorder, like compulsive personality disorder. one feels compelled to lie for no particular reason.
if there is any method to the lies, and reason for lying for example, hiding something, or for personal gain. thenthere IS no disorder, simply a dishonest and worthless human being. who might lie to defend her character by saying she has compulsive behavior disorder to justify getting caught in a lie to avoid responsibility.
like a murderer pleaing insanity


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OfflineaYs
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Re: Compulsive Lying [Re: Mitchnast]
    #1360147 - 03/09/03 11:49 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

liar

naw, I'm just playin'. what kind of stuff does she lie about?


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Offlineenotake2
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Re: Compulsive Lying [Re: Mitchnast]
    #1360210 - 03/09/03 12:21 PM (14 years, 3 months ago)

Do you mean obsessive compulsive disorder? I havn't heard of compulsive lying being a compulsion. If it is, I'd say it is a fairly uncommon one. Complusive lying is a common symptom of antisocial personality disorder though. Look in to that one DrGonzo.


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Computer games don't affect kids. I mean if Pacman affected our generation as kids, we'd all be running around in a darkened room, munching pills and listening to repetitive electronic music.

"Being bitter and hateful is like drinking a vial of poison and hoping the other person gets sick" FreakQLibrium

"My motto from here on out is: If someone or something (including me) in my life is conducting themselves in such a way that they can be seen on Jerry Springer, it's time to take out the garbage!!! When you stop taking their behaviour personally and see their antics as a true reflection on their character, it becomes absolutely nauseating." Anon. on abusive relationships.


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Offlineenotake2
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Re: Compulsive Lying [Re: enotake2]
    #1361494 - 03/09/03 10:28 PM (14 years, 3 months ago)

Another reason could be out of embarrasment. Depends what she lies about though. Or it could be multiple personality! Though that's a very very uncommon disorder. Does she lose time - like not remember what she has done for days (not because of drugs)?


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Computer games don't affect kids. I mean if Pacman affected our generation as kids, we'd all be running around in a darkened room, munching pills and listening to repetitive electronic music.

"Being bitter and hateful is like drinking a vial of poison and hoping the other person gets sick" FreakQLibrium

"My motto from here on out is: If someone or something (including me) in my life is conducting themselves in such a way that they can be seen on Jerry Springer, it's time to take out the garbage!!! When you stop taking their behaviour personally and see their antics as a true reflection on their character, it becomes absolutely nauseating." Anon. on abusive relationships.


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OfflineDrGonzo
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Re: Compulsive Lying [Re: enotake2]
    #1361573 - 03/10/03 12:17 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

I couldn't really tell you what she lies about. It just seems like her story doesn't seem the same from time to time. Like something she'll have told me months ago wont match up with the same thing she tells me recently. It's hard to pin down. I don't think she has a multiple personality problem, though I don't know much about it. She doesn't lose track of what she's done.


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OfflineBaby_Hitler
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Re: Compulsive Lying [Re: DrGonzo]
    #1361574 - 03/10/03 12:18 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

I've known a few people who do that.

I think they do it just to have something to talk about.

The ones I've known all just seem to be trying to live in some kind of fantasy world, and make up interesting stories about things that never happened.

Does she lie to cover things up, or does she just make stuff up.

like "I was at the mall today, and I saw this guy who blah blah blah..."

And none of it actually happened.


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OfflineDrGonzo
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Re: Compulsive Lying [Re: Baby_Hitler]
    #1361589 - 03/10/03 12:42 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

I wish I knew whether or not she lies to cover things up or not. If she does she seems to be doing a pretty good job of it because I haven't caught her in a lie yet. I do think that she might make up stories just to sound impressive though, like brag about past drug use, shit like that.


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Offlineenotake2
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Re: Compulsive Lying [Re: DrGonzo]
    #1361595 - 03/10/03 12:46 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

She's not an alcoholic is she? They 'confabulate' and make up stories sometimes. Aside from having a poor memory, they have a deficit in accurately searching for memories and kind of produce any information and believe it is true though it isn't. That's if they have frontal lobe damage - after drinking a lot of alcohol.


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Computer games don't affect kids. I mean if Pacman affected our generation as kids, we'd all be running around in a darkened room, munching pills and listening to repetitive electronic music.

"Being bitter and hateful is like drinking a vial of poison and hoping the other person gets sick" FreakQLibrium

"My motto from here on out is: If someone or something (including me) in my life is conducting themselves in such a way that they can be seen on Jerry Springer, it's time to take out the garbage!!! When you stop taking their behaviour personally and see their antics as a true reflection on their character, it becomes absolutely nauseating." Anon. on abusive relationships.


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OfflineDrGonzo
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Re: Compulsive Lying [Re: enotake2]
    #1361603 - 03/10/03 01:02 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

If you would have asked me that question 5 or 6 months ago I'd tell you that it's likely that she is, but she's cut down drinking drastically since then and hasn't had a drink in a few months.


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Offlineenotake2
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Re: Compulsive Lying [Re: DrGonzo]
    #1361610 - 03/10/03 01:10 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

Right, well that might be a possiblity then, because the damage is usually permanent. I'd have a look into the antisocial personality description too and see if that fits.


--------------------
Computer games don't affect kids. I mean if Pacman affected our generation as kids, we'd all be running around in a darkened room, munching pills and listening to repetitive electronic music.

"Being bitter and hateful is like drinking a vial of poison and hoping the other person gets sick" FreakQLibrium

"My motto from here on out is: If someone or something (including me) in my life is conducting themselves in such a way that they can be seen on Jerry Springer, it's time to take out the garbage!!! When you stop taking their behaviour personally and see their antics as a true reflection on their character, it becomes absolutely nauseating." Anon. on abusive relationships.


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OfflineDrGonzo
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Re: Compulsive Lying [Re: enotake2]
    #1365386 - 03/11/03 09:57 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

Thanks for the help everyone.


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OfflineMarkostheGnostic
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Re: Compulsive Lying [Re: DrGonzo]
    #1365981 - 03/11/03 12:48 PM (14 years, 3 months ago)

In my work with adolescents, who couldn't care less if one calls them a 'thug' or a 'gangsta,' and who often like it, the one thing that really gets their collective goat is to suggest that they are mentally ill. Further, I made it abundantly clear that the more one lies, the more mentally ill one is. Eventually, I tell them, they will forget what they've told to whom, believe their own lies (which has happened to them!) and really be crazy.

Of course, I'm talking to middle school kids, but I firmly believe that mental health is inversely proportional to lying. When Scott Peck wrote 'The People of the Lie,' he convinced me that the lie is at the root of evil.


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γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself


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OfflineJammer
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Re: Compulsive Lying [Re: DrGonzo]
    #1370985 - 03/12/03 11:02 PM (14 years, 3 months ago)

I spent many years with a live in girlfriend that was a compulsive liar. After many years of trying to get her to stop (obvious lies) I finally concluded that some complusive liars have this condition to the point that they cant be changed.


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>>Jammer>>


Edited by Jammer (03/13/03 08:23 PM)


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Offlinefliped
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Re: Compulsive Lying [Re: Jammer]
    #1375388 - 03/14/03 09:43 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

My brother is a compulsive liar, it almost seems to me that when he is lying he starts to believe what he said and he runs with it. He has been this way as long as i can remember


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Offlinemetalchimp
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Re: Compulsive Lying [Re: DrGonzo]
    #1378355 - 03/15/03 02:14 PM (14 years, 3 months ago)

its a long shot but look into borderline personality disorder, compulsive lying is a symptom & it is one of the most common mental illnesses in women (also one of the least known about)


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OfflineSeeka
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Re: Compulsive Lying [Re: metalchimp]
    #1378437 - 03/15/03 02:51 PM (14 years, 3 months ago)

Yeah, we're definitely talking about Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder here, if it is in fact a compulsion. Some feel the need to lie all the time ... well, whatever rocks your boat. If you HAVE to lie, then it's OCD.

But uh, honestly, it sounds like she's having an affair.


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Offlineenotake2
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Re: Compulsive Lying [Re: Seeka]
    #1378722 - 03/15/03 05:44 PM (14 years, 3 months ago)

Well after 10 years of studying and working in psychology, I've never heard of lying being one of the compulsions of OCD. I did a search on google ("ocd" and "lying") to check my facts, and there is no confirmation of it, except for speculaion of laymen in forums.


--------------------
Computer games don't affect kids. I mean if Pacman affected our generation as kids, we'd all be running around in a darkened room, munching pills and listening to repetitive electronic music.

"Being bitter and hateful is like drinking a vial of poison and hoping the other person gets sick" FreakQLibrium

"My motto from here on out is: If someone or something (including me) in my life is conducting themselves in such a way that they can be seen on Jerry Springer, it's time to take out the garbage!!! When you stop taking their behaviour personally and see their antics as a true reflection on their character, it becomes absolutely nauseating." Anon. on abusive relationships.


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OfflineLauren
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Re: Compulsive Lying [Re: Seeka]
    #1378727 - 03/15/03 05:46 PM (14 years, 3 months ago)

Can I suggest that you start paying more attention to when she tells a fib. Watch out for the timing in conversation when you think she's started to lie to you. Then you might be able to see whether she's doing it to impress you or like someone suggested before whether she's just doing it to have something to say.



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What do you think I'd see if I could walk away from me?


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OfflineMarkostheGnostic
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Re: Compulsive Lying [Re: metalchimp]
    #1380001 - 03/16/03 07:18 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

In "People of the Lie,' Scott Peck suggests that if there were ever to be a DSM clinical disorder for 'evil,' it would be Borderline Personality Disorder. He used the old nomenclature - "ambulatory schizophrenia."

For 10 years, I was married to a Borderline PD with antisocial and sadistic features (I'm a psychotherapist who should've known better). Since my divorce, I have read a great deal about this, counselled others who have been married to BPD individuals, and taken several seminars (one with expert James Masterson). Your suggestion is not a long shot. Since there is no abiding sense of identity in borderlines, neither is there a value for subjective accuracy, i.e., truth.


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γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself


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