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Anonymous #1
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Does it ever work out between divorced couples w kids?
#13489246 - 11/15/10 06:43 PM (13 years, 3 months ago) |
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When there is so much bitterness, and you guys decide to move on, does the bitterness ever go away? Like when you take turns w/ the child(s), being fair , not provoking the other, etc.
I ask , because it seems so many divorces are so bad, and a lot of times the two seem to stay bitter. Has anyone seem otherwise?
Im not asking about getting bad together, im asking about moving on, and still seeing the other person and being happy for em, not hurt
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Anonymous #2
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Does it ever work out between divorced couples w kids? [Re: Anonymous #2]
#13489319 - 11/15/10 07:00 PM (13 years, 3 months ago) |
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your probably right :/ doesnt seem like there is - somethings you just cant re-do or take back....and people are thick headed, and egotistical, we want to come out on top no matter the expense.
to bad for the kids, looks like all i can do is do the best to get equal custody and raise my kid
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Anonymous #2
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Does it ever work out between divorced couples w kids? [Re: Anonymous #2]
#13489369 - 11/15/10 07:09 PM (13 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Anonymous #2 said: was she fucking someone else, bro?
I dont think so, because she probably would have thrown it in my face by now, you know? but who knows -
the sad thing is, i love her and my kid as much as i can, and just want a family.
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Anonymous #3
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Re: Does it ever work out between divorced couples w kids? [Re: Anonymous #1]
#13490610 - 11/15/10 11:23 PM (13 years, 3 months ago) |
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My parents got divorced and somehow stayed civil with each other.
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Anonymous #4
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Re: Does it ever work out between divorced couples w kids? [Re: Anonymous #3]
#13490773 - 11/16/10 12:04 AM (13 years, 3 months ago) |
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DSHSB...FTW!
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Anonymous #5
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Re: Does it ever work out between divorced couples w kids? [Re: Anonymous #4]
#13491020 - 11/16/10 01:53 AM (13 years, 3 months ago) |
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My parents divorced, for abuse reasons. One thing I've found to hold true no matter the circumstance, is people never TRULY change.
the fuckup you knew in high school is still a fuck up, even if monetarily they exist otherwise.
your kids wont forget it, believe me. And it will always be painful. The only thing that seems to help, is to pretend everything is ok. Because then, you can atleast enjoy the moment you do have. However I will admit that divorce is a whole lot easier on children under the age of "consciousness" - when they begin to realize their father and mother are just humans that joined at the waste, and caused them to become existent; no matter how intentional or unintentional(as it usually is).
Even now, 6 years after, there is no change in personality for either parent. And my life is totally altered from what it could have been. When it comes to blood relations, a fuck up sends ripples throughout each others lives, and looking at each other is a smack-in-the-face reminder of who we are at a core level.
So sad , since we have but one life to live...
Move forward, and show your best colors at all times. The latter being most important of all. For then, you at least, did your best - and that is acceptable...understandable. Their dreams of what was to be reality are already crushed and stomped upon; I ponder if you as a parent partake in that, or if it's all just some sort of surreal ejaculation, without any true cause, in your mind. That's at least how most divorced parents appear; since we as humans always continue the same path of execution we started on.
Severe trama mentally and physically seems to help aid in self-generation of change. Imagine if your wife ran you over with her car after the divorce.. or visa versa ( non-fatal). You would see life very differently. I wish your kids the best - whatever you & your ex make of it all.
Honestly, there is ALWAYS hope. But because you and your wife will die the same people you are now; it is highly unlikely that you will ever resolve your problems completely. You would have to both decide that there is a greater good achieved when together(ie. ignoring the differences, and accepting the losses), and approach that as a goal every day. And that is unbelievably difficult for people that don't get along in the first place. I think you should be more concerned for your children, who are now and forever scarred.. If they've lost the sparkle in their eyes, then you are too late.
Or you could change, and somehow convince your wife to change. Wouldn't that be a role model for your kids. Haha... to think that's even possible... People changing in a selfless act. Hahahaha.
Or you could be like my parents, drink alcohol and forget it all, as if it was a job you were fired from. A maintained separation with intermittent squabbling diluted in alcohol: seems to be working quite well for them.
Divorce is a sour joke. Put that in your pipe and smoke it. (no offense intended; unless it invokes intelligent,cognitive thought within you)
Edited by Anonymous (11/16/10 03:26 AM)
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