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DailyPot
Trip'n Time
Registered: 11/17/02
Posts: 2,207
Loc: Florida
Last seen: 18 years, 1 month
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Re: Being Gay [Re: Bavet]
#1539600 - 05/11/03 05:56 PM (20 years, 10 months ago) |
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Dude you don't need to be gay I mean can u honestly say You don't find hot beautiful women attractive?
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I think there are only two ways for Steve to find peace. He either needs to become more acquainted with the gay community and lifestyle or he needs to find a way to become heterosexual. Either of those paths may result in peace. I have known homosexuals that have chosen either path to peace.
Homosexuality isn't something you choose, I dont know many people that would choose it. The woman might look attractive but they just dont get gays sexually aroused anymore than a male model would you Just the way chick automaticlly look good and catch your eye the same is reverse for them.
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being gay is not an easy thing, but don't hide it!!
Umm, I partially disagree, depending on age. If you're still in highschool I wouldn't tell anyone except (maybe) my best friend. Things will change when you get older, out of highschool alot more people come out. Just chill out and make friends, think about it, you could find a guy for every 20 friends you have
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Strumpling
Neuronaut
Registered: 10/11/02
Posts: 7,571
Loc: Hyperspace
Last seen: 12 years, 9 months
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Re: Being Gay [Re: DailyPot]
#1539660 - 05/11/03 06:36 PM (20 years, 10 months ago) |
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I don't know exactly how old Steve is, but according to my intuition he is well past the high school drama bullshit and into the "real world."
-------------------- Insert an "I think" mentally in front of eveything I say that seems sketchy, because I certainly don't KNOW much. Also; feel free to yell at me. In addition: SHPONGLE
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DailyPot
Trip'n Time
Registered: 11/17/02
Posts: 2,207
Loc: Florida
Last seen: 18 years, 1 month
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If he's in the real world I say go ahead. I think most people just do it that way.
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mantis
Registered: 01/26/03
Posts: 5,235
Loc: Bunker Alpha, GMC
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i'm straight... that's normal some people are gay or bi... that's normal as well
there are homosexuals and heterosexuals everywhere in the animal kingdom... that's about as NORMAL as it gets!
it's a matter of preference, i like girls w/ long hair and little makeup... some guys like other guys. it's just like a guy who prefers women w/ blonde hair.
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SWAY
SurrealPhantasmicSubConscious
Registered: 04/11/03
Posts: 71
Loc: A Dream...
Last seen: 20 years, 9 months
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Re: Being Gay [Re: mantis]
#1593565 - 05/30/03 02:37 PM (20 years, 9 months ago) |
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its a trend to dislike gays kinda, if you're in school then you will probably feel pressure to agree with them(your friends, the other kids) that gayness isnt accepted even if you dont mind it yourself ahead of time, its like peer pressure there
oh and btw there was a thing invented called the internet, we're using it now, its a great way of communication! and a great way to find people too if you want! i bet there would be alot of people that may be just like you if you feel like your far different than the majority and that nobody understands you
SWAY
-------------------- ?People keep searching for happines in the outside, what they don't know is that it's in the inside? ?In an infinite universe, anything that can exist, must exist? Bear ?To think too long about doing a thing often becomes its undoing? Eva Young
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Le_Canard
The Duk Abides
Registered: 05/16/03
Posts: 94,392
Loc: Earthfarm 1
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RebelSteve, I applaud (and admire) your bravery in coming out and seeking support here! What more can I say? It sounds like you're on the right path, and I've seen some great advice given here on this thread! Heres my personal take on the matter: Although I'm heterosexual, I feel that what two consenting adults do private is no ones business but their own. Ignore the "gay bashers" and homophobes and see them for what they are: stupid, pathetic hate filled people, more to be pitied than anything... Good luck in finding yourself and other like minded individual, and all the best to you! Keep us posted on how things work out!
Edited by Le_Canard (05/30/03 07:46 PM)
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Acidic_Sloth
Acidic poly-Sided Di-slothamide
Registered: 05/29/02
Posts: 43,732
Loc: ainrofilac
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dude, i didn't know you were gay!!
fuck yeah!! i love gay men.. =) if you lived closer, i would so try and hook you up with someone. i know several gay guys who would totally find you uber hot. =D
-------------------- -- Accept my heart warming gift of TREE SCRATCHIES!!! I absolve thee!! -- JaP: 30,000 lines of gay, cock, and fag can't be wrong Ped: only in #shroomery is "smuggle opium in her ass" followed by "i don't want shitty opium" which is followed by " *** Joins: PENISSQUAD" -- JaP: What would this place be without random sluts? JaP: Nothing, I tell you.
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Raedon
enthusiast
Registered: 04/07/03
Posts: 271
Last seen: 17 years, 9 months
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I'm on the other side of this story..
I'm the hopeless homophobe. Seeing men holding hands bothers me to no end and leaves me feeling descusted. I don't understand men wanting to be with men, but I do understand not wanting to be lonely. Hope everything works out and you find happiness.
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Strumpling
Neuronaut
Registered: 10/11/02
Posts: 7,571
Loc: Hyperspace
Last seen: 12 years, 9 months
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Re: Being Gay [Re: Raedon]
#1597292 - 05/31/03 11:37 PM (20 years, 9 months ago) |
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its "disgusted," homophobe
-------------------- Insert an "I think" mentally in front of eveything I say that seems sketchy, because I certainly don't KNOW much. Also; feel free to yell at me. In addition: SHPONGLE
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Raedon
enthusiast
Registered: 04/07/03
Posts: 271
Last seen: 17 years, 9 months
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that to.. :P haha
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Pinhead
Oregano
Registered: 05/13/00
Posts: 1,819
Loc: Hootersville
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Bottom line is that you are who you are.Start being comfortable with the fact that you're gay.I don't think that any of us got to choose our sexual preference.
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poke smot!
floccinocci floofinator
Registered: 01/08/03
Posts: 5,248
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Re: Being Gay *DELETED* [Re: Pinhead]
#1598574 - 06/01/03 03:24 PM (20 years, 9 months ago) |
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Post deleted by poke smot!Reason for deletion: x
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Pinhead
Oregano
Registered: 05/13/00
Posts: 1,819
Loc: Hootersville
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Sure, I felt like fucking some guy up the ass once.. I did'nt.. Even if I had, I don't think this would qualify me as "Gay" Why are we so into labeling people?
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Phencyclidine
Molecule
Registered: 06/02/03
Posts: 2,915
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Re: Being Gay [Re: sirreal]
#1603464 - 06/03/03 12:50 AM (20 years, 9 months ago) |
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I do not need somebody to "compel" me into thinking that it is natural to be attracted to someone of the opposite sex and to have children. Mankind would not have survived without this natural "compulsion".
Your logic is flawed. It would be possible for the race to be carried on if everyone was bisexual. In that case, it could be "natural" to be attracted to both the "opposite" sex and the same sex.
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Anonymous #1
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- Post History Deleted Upon User's Request -
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Acidic_Sloth
Acidic poly-Sided Di-slothamide
Registered: 05/29/02
Posts: 43,732
Loc: ainrofilac
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ok... don't hate being gay, hun. it's who you are, don't try to be something you're not. i know for a fact that you are a wonderful, beautiful person. any man would be lucky enough to have you. hell.. i'd get a sex change if i could. hehe
what i'm trying to say is, just come out with it. i know it's hard, and you could lose some friends, but do you really want friends that won't accept you for YOU?
just because you're gay, doesn't make you any less of a man. don't feel isolated becuase of your sexual preference. don't be ashamed of who you are, steve. let the whole fucking world know who you are, and where you're coming from. i promise that if you let at least one person know (your closest friend) that you will feel the burden being lifted.
or you could always move here, i know several gay guys that would die to have someone as sexy and sweet as you.
-------------------- -- Accept my heart warming gift of TREE SCRATCHIES!!! I absolve thee!! -- JaP: 30,000 lines of gay, cock, and fag can't be wrong Ped: only in #shroomery is "smuggle opium in her ass" followed by "i don't want shitty opium" which is followed by " *** Joins: PENISSQUAD" -- JaP: What would this place be without random sluts? JaP: Nothing, I tell you.
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White_Widow
Lost fairy
Registered: 07/04/02
Posts: 86
Loc: Sweet Old Europe
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Ditto!!!
And Bravo! Acidic_Sloth
I know myself that "coming out" is hard and painfull if you're lonly, but I'd love to through the thrill of it all again (and sometimes I do, but people is so "progressive" here now that it's even trandy to have gay friends LOL).
Rebel, simply let your mind settle down... and don't interfer in any "logical" way... You'll find what gives you more pleasure and makes you feel really confortable, and it doesn't mean that'll be definitive yet!!!
Look at me: I'm one of those butchy gay guys, bald and hairy, with a wonderful boyfriend... but I love boobies just as ?poke smot!? does.
Life is just like this...
-------------------- "Love is the law; love under will..."
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NariusFractal
Sat Chit Ananda
Registered: 12/19/02
Posts: 804
Loc: USA
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Re: Being Gay [Re: geokills]
#1623739 - 06/10/03 01:30 PM (20 years, 9 months ago) |
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Anytime someone says "Everyone has or does blah blah," then you can safely bet they partake or believe in that blah blah. Example: My friend who smokes pot all the time and is a huge stoner says "Everyone smokes pot" and while many do, there are many more who don't. To him though, it seems everyone does. Show me a man who says "Everyone cheats on their wives" and I"ll show you a man who cheats on his wife. I guess my point is that generalities are misleading and not an accurate representation of reality
-------------------- You are the microcosm of the macrocosm.
Edited by sheister (06/10/03 01:33 PM)
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silversoul7
Chill the FuckOut!
Registered: 10/10/02
Posts: 27,301
Loc: mndfreeze's puppet army
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"Everyone is gay"--Kurt Cobain
-------------------- "It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong."--Voltaire
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Boppity604
Stranger
Registered: 10/19/01
Posts: 1,056
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RebelSteve: Sorry I found this thread so late from the time of the original post...but hopefully you've been becoming more comfortable with your situation. Just wanted to let you know that I too am gay, and by no means what you call a "flamer." I do want to point out, however, that homophobia is not limited to non-gay people.
I can understand why you might not be able to identify with "queens" or "flamers"...but you need to ask yourself why there's a repulsion to it in the first place? I know plenty of "flaming" heterosexual men in the world...it doesn't make them gay. After reading through this entire thread I would like to make a few comments:
1. Sexuality as Polarity. To even have to plot sexual orientation in such a way, in my mind, misses the whole point. Orientation has NOTHING to do with behavior. I've known I was gay my entire life. Orientation is about the emotional and spiritual aspects of character that we take comfort and solice in our lover. I have never had a crush on a girl or woman in my life. I have never wanted to be with a woman sexually. This doesn't mean I don't think a woman is sexy or "hot"...I think women are very beautiful...I just don't have the inner impulse to want to be intimate with them. The thought of sex with a woman doesn't disgust me or repulse me...it's just an act I am not desirous for. Orientation has nothing to do with behavior. Straight men in prison can have sex with each other for lack of any other outlet of sexual tension, that doesn't mean they've "become" gay. Likewise, I could have sex with a woman to conceive a child but it wouldn't suddenly mean I "became" straight. Orientation is part of the basic make up of our psyche; a trait I personally believe is genetic...but that's for another discussion thread.
2. Coming Out: Self acceptance is the key issue with coming out. It's way easier to stand up in front of a room full of strangers and scream out "I'm here, I'm queer, get used to it!" than it is to go home, look yourself in the eye in the mirror and say "I am gay, and I love myself." Coming out is a process that is unique for each gay individual and can't be forced. RebelSteve, don't hate yourself for being the way you are...embrace yourself for being the way you are. You are in control of your own happiness. Nobody in the world can make you happy; only you can make yourself happy. Coming out to yourself is the most important thing you can do in order to sustain a healthy life; regardless of any social situations...you need to be happy and secure internally first. You're not the first person going through your situation, and you won't be the last either. Hopefully by now you've branched out, even if only online, to gay chat sites or clubs/groups. If you're in school, you can always check with the counseling services to see if there's a GBL-related support group. Solidarity is very important and just being around other people who are "like you" makes it easier to finally accept yourself and your situation with positive feelings about it.
3. Tolerance vs Acceptance: To "tolerate" something does nothing in the way of learning to just accept it. Tolerating means to "put up with"...as if it's to say "it's still wrong to be gay, but we have to put up with it...cause that's the right thing to do." From reading many of the remarks and replies on this board over the last two years, it's quite obvious who's "young" and who's not (and I don't just mean the support section of the board). RebelSteve...take sly comments from kids with a grain of salt. The majority of posters/members of the shroomery community are a great source of solidarity and support. I think you'll find out real fast that in the real world, strangers are more willing to accept you if they see you accept yourself. Be proud of who you are for the sake of simply being yourself. You don't need to be anything but honest with yourself...and that will translate into truthfulness with others that will translate back to you from them as acceptance and respect.
Finally, regardless of our orientations I think it is most important (especially for the younger kids out there just "coming into life") to realize the character of an individual is what matters most. Respect and Love should be genuine...not forced. If you fear gay people because you think we're going to gang up and attack you...you really need to step back and examine your own perceptions of sexual behaviour. That which we find at fault with others is always a reflection of those apsects of our own identity that we don't like or refuse to change. That doesn't mean all homophobes are gay; what it does mean isthat homophobia stems from a hatred based on misguided perceptions of sexuality and sexual behavior. If a straight man thinks gay men all want to just get into his pants, I'd hate to be a girl in a party with that same dude; chances are he's only looking to get into the pants of a girl there. See the point? Don't judge a person by the social "group" they openly belong to (gay, republican, MADD, etc) but be more concerned for getting to know that person and their character before passing any type of judgement. I'd much rather hang out with decent and respectable people who belong to "groups" I personally don't belong to...than to hang out with a room full of hateful and self-pitying people in the groups that I do associate myself with.
RS: If you ever need someone to chat with...hit me up in a message or look for Boppity 604 on AIM.
Love & Light (to all),
Boppity
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