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OfflinePreparationH
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Birthday Hemorrhoid!
    #13226226 - 09/21/10 09:51 AM (13 years, 6 months ago)

It's like some sick joke the universe played on me, I woke up this morning of my 20th birthday with a damn hemhhroid and I'm away at school so I can't go see my doctor :birthday:

WOOHOO LOL

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Offlinewellage
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: PreparationH]
    #13226234 - 09/21/10 09:52 AM (13 years, 6 months ago)

Are you obese?

That's really weird to have one so young

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OfflinePreparationH
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: wellage]
    #13226248 - 09/21/10 09:55 AM (13 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

wellage said:
Are you obese?

That's really weird to have one so young



nope, I'm actually in great shape, the best shape of my life, even better than the majority of my friends.  I had it happen like 2 years ago and had some laser put up my bum and it just went away instantly.  Time to go back over thanksgiving now :frown:



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Offlinewellage
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: PreparationH]
    #13226257 - 09/21/10 09:57 AM (13 years, 6 months ago)

I would REALLY recommend adding some yoga and breathing exercises to your fitness plan. You need to learn how to keep your energy in the 'closed' position down there or you are going to keep popping those things out, and that's really bad news considering how much life you have left in you.

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OfflinePreparationH
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: wellage]
    #13226275 - 09/21/10 10:04 AM (13 years, 6 months ago)

:shrug: It's from squats, learned my lesson, not doin them again cause it's not worth it.  Just gonna stick to dead lifts then do other work outs for legs.  Only hurts to sit down so running and etc. is fine.  Today, reached 20 pull ups which has been my goal for like 6 fuckin months now :smile: 20 on my 20th birthday woot.



*waits for gonz to tell me they won't have proctologists in Iran* :rofl:

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Offlinewellage
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: PreparationH]
    #13226304 - 09/21/10 10:12 AM (13 years, 6 months ago)

Yeah, squats will do it to ya. I would still recommend reading up on gaining control of your asshole, because you obviously have the propensity to carry yourself in a way that puts pressure on those blood vessels.

It doesn't have to be like this!!

I know lots of young people who do squats, and none of them have hemorrhoids (yet).

You already have had 2!! think about what life might be like for you in 20 years!!!!

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OfflinePreparationH
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: wellage]
    #13226312 - 09/21/10 10:14 AM (13 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

wellage said:
Yeah, squats will do it to ya. I would still recommend reading up on gaining control of your asshole, because you obviously have the propensity to carry yourself in a way that puts pressure on those blood vessels.

It doesn't have to be like this!!

I know lots of young people who do squats, and none of them have hemorrhoids (yet).

You already have had 2!! think about what life might be like for you in 20 years!!!!



well 2 years ago I got them from squats then while at the gym the other night I was like "I'm much stronger now, ehhhhh I'll risk it" :facepalm: stupid move.

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OfflineSolemente
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: wellage]
    #13226315 - 09/21/10 10:15 AM (13 years, 6 months ago)

Man, hemorrhoids suck sooo bad. I've had a few, but not in a long time. I sometimes got them after doing a bunch of coke.

Hydrocortisone is your friend, happy bday:highdog:

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InvisibleP-O
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: PreparationH] * 1
    #13226343 - 09/21/10 10:23 AM (13 years, 6 months ago)

happy birthday dude.

sorry bout ur asshole

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Offlinebbl337
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: P-O]
    #13226349 - 09/21/10 10:24 AM (13 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

PostiveOutlook said:
happy birthday dude.

sorry bout ur asshole




+1


--------------------
 

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OfflinePreparationH
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: bbl337]
    #13226360 - 09/21/10 10:26 AM (13 years, 6 months ago)

it's utter irony though. I named myself preparationh prior to ever getting one, it's like I brought it on myself :snub:

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InvisibleGumby
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: PreparationH]
    #13226416 - 09/21/10 10:39 AM (13 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

PreparationH said:
it's utter irony though. I named myself preparationh prior to ever getting one, it's like I brought it on myself :snub:




Really? I thought you used that name BECAUSE you had hemorrhoids. Damn that's just bad luck.

Happy birthday dude.

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OfflineTri High
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: PreparationH]
    #13226456 - 09/21/10 10:48 AM (13 years, 6 months ago)

yeah, happy birthday.

And by thanksgiving it'll have gone away.  If today's the first day tomorrow'll be worse.  Then it starts to get better.

bummer, bromo.

But :haha: anyway, cuz this time it's not me!


--------------------
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InvisiblePrisoner#1
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: Gumby]
    #13226458 - 09/21/10 10:48 AM (13 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Gumby said:
Quote:

PreparationH said:
it's utter irony though. I named myself preparationh prior to ever getting one, it's like I brought it on myself :snub:




Really? I thought you used that name BECAUSE you had hemorrhoids. Damn that's just bad luck.





you sure it's not karmic retribution?

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OfflinePreparationH
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: Prisoner#1]
    #13226503 - 09/21/10 10:58 AM (13 years, 6 months ago)

maybe, I've said it befor but I'm glad I didn't name myself "chemotherapy"

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OfflineWakeboardrB
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: PreparationH]
    #13226578 - 09/21/10 11:21 AM (13 years, 6 months ago)

20 years old and you've been here since 05...

:failboat:

Happy Birthday!


--------------------
Same thing happened to me when I played Neil Armstrong in Moonshot. They found me in an alley in Burbank trying to re-enter the earth's atmosphere in an old refrigerator box.

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InvisibleSalomon
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: PreparationH]
    #13226599 - 09/21/10 11:28 AM (13 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

PreparationH said:
maybe, I've said it befor but I'm glad I didn't name myself "chemotherapy"



:ilold:

happy birfday dude.

mabye you should stop with the self inflicted dry smashing then, eh?


--------------------
EVERYTHING EVENTUALLY BECOMES A DESERT


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Invisiblefissionchips
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: Salomon]
    #13226801 - 09/21/10 12:20 PM (13 years, 6 months ago)

So how old were you when you joined the site when you were 15?

Happy birthday! You're Busted!

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OfflineWakeboardrB
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: fissionchips]
    #13226814 - 09/21/10 12:25 PM (13 years, 6 months ago)

According to the date he was only 14.


--------------------
Same thing happened to me when I played Neil Armstrong in Moonshot. They found me in an alley in Burbank trying to re-enter the earth's atmosphere in an old refrigerator box.

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Invisiblefissionchips
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: WakeboardrB]
    #13226840 - 09/21/10 12:32 PM (13 years, 6 months ago)

I'm busted. And it's not even my birthday.

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OfflineTetriana
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: WakeboardrB]
    #13226847 - 09/21/10 12:33 PM (13 years, 6 months ago)

Happy Birthday! Get thee to Walgreens and get some of your namesake. :wink:


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OfflinePreparationH
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: Tetriana]
    #13227031 - 09/21/10 01:27 PM (13 years, 6 months ago)

I was 14 or 15 but I just kept my trap shut about things that could give me away, a lot of people used to pm me asking me if I was like over 30 :wtf:

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OfflineRoosterCogburn
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: PreparationH]
    #13227046 - 09/21/10 01:30 PM (13 years, 6 months ago)

Soak your asshole in witch hazel. The $2 cure. :yesnod:

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InvisibleLobsterSauceDiscord
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: PreparationH]
    #13227054 - 09/21/10 01:31 PM (13 years, 6 months ago)

Hemrorrhoids are so much fun aren't they? I wish I got fancy lasers. The doctor tried shoving it back up.:facepalm:

It went away after a while but then it came back. I think it's gone :uhoh:


--------------------

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InvisibleParkseerf
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: LobsterSauce]
    #13227254 - 09/21/10 02:20 PM (13 years, 6 months ago)

Im 19 and ive had 2 hemorrhoids also :feelsbadman: Im in decent shape but my diet was terrible.

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InvisiblePrisoner#1
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: Tetriana]
    #13227285 - 09/21/10 02:28 PM (13 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Tetriana said:
Happy Birthday! Get thee to Walgreens and get some of your namesake.





you english girls sure do talk funny  :smirk:

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InvisiblePrisoner#1
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: Parkseerf]
    #13227289 - 09/21/10 02:29 PM (13 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Parks229 said:
Im 19 and ive had 2 hemorrhoids also





I'm 42 and my hemorrhoids are doing their homework

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InvisibleParkseerf
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: Prisoner#1]
    #13227305 - 09/21/10 02:32 PM (13 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Prisoner#1 said:
Quote:

Parks229 said:
Im 19 and ive had 2 hemorrhoids also





I'm 42 and my hemorrhoids are doing their homework




haha I really hope exercise and a decent diet keeps these things away, they're fucking miserable. I only got them in the fall too:strokebeard:

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OfflineTri High
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: PreparationH]
    #13227353 - 09/21/10 02:45 PM (13 years, 6 months ago)

I dare you to take a picture and post it in SA.

:chicken:


--------------------
you just need money to get laid - starfire_xes

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Invisiblevinsue
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: PreparationH]
    #13228110 - 09/21/10 05:41 PM (13 years, 6 months ago)

Interesting BDay post. One of my first bosses always used to say, "keep yer chin up, or shoot strait, or what ever, and keep a tight asshole" ... Not sure if he was referring to his or his old lady's A-hole.:shrug:
Quote:

PreparationH said:
I was 14 or 15 but I just kept my trap shut about things that could give me away, a lot of people used to pm me asking me if I was like over 30 :wtf:



I figured you to be about 25 - 30 .  .  . :cheers:... :drinklager: This beer's for you... well really me but whatever... :happybday: . . . :peace:


--------------------

"All mushrooms are edible; but some only once." Croatian proverb. BTW ...
  Have You Rated Ythans Mom Yet ?? ... :taser:  ... HERE'S HOW ... (be nice) .  :mod: ... :peace:

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OfflinePreparationH
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: vinsue]
    #13228224 - 09/21/10 06:10 PM (13 years, 6 months ago)

...mad people on here have roids or some shit, someone posted a pic of their roid in SA and it isn't me :rofl2:

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OfflineTri High
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: PreparationH]
    #13228235 - 09/21/10 06:13 PM (13 years, 6 months ago)

yeah right.

nice butthole :crazy2:


--------------------
you just need money to get laid - starfire_xes

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InvisibleSalomon
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: PreparationH]
    #13228237 - 09/21/10 06:14 PM (13 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

PreparationH said:
...mad people on here have roids or some shit, someone posted a pic of their roid in SA and it isn't me :rofl2:



:now i have to go look :argh:


--------------------
EVERYTHING EVENTUALLY BECOMES A DESERT


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OfflinePreparationH
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: Tri High]
    #13228244 - 09/21/10 06:15 PM (13 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Tri High said:
yeah right.

nice butthole :crazy2:



how dare you, I'll have you know my sphincter is much nicer than that, peasant!

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Offlinerobbyberto
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: PreparationH]
    #13228258 - 09/21/10 06:18 PM (13 years, 6 months ago)

pics or it didn't happen


--------------------
“People say having kids is life changing, well that doesn’t necessarily mean a good thing, does it? I could take one of my legs off. That would change my life.” -Karl Pilkington


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InvisibleP-O
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: Tri High]
    #13228260 - 09/21/10 06:18 PM (13 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Tri High said:

nice butthole



:lol:

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OfflineTri High
Whigro
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: PreparationH]
    #13228292 - 09/21/10 06:26 PM (13 years, 6 months ago)

Peasant?!

How dare you.  I'll have you know I'm a 2000th [recorded] generation reptilian. 

Bow to me, mammalian fodder.


--------------------
you just need money to get laid - starfire_xes

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InvisiblePrisoner#1
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: Tri High]
    #13228304 - 09/21/10 06:28 PM (13 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Tri High said:
I dare you to take a picture and post it in SA.

:chicken:





I'll post a picture of mine right here


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OfflineTri High
Whigro
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: Prisoner#1]
    #13228316 - 09/21/10 06:30 PM (13 years, 6 months ago)

I tole you I's gun do it.  I tole you.

yuns ne'r lissun.


--------------------
you just need money to get laid - starfire_xes

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InvisiblePrisoner#1
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Re: Birthday Hemorrhoid! [Re: Tri High]
    #13228318 - 09/21/10 06:31 PM (13 years, 6 months ago)

lol

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