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Pandor
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Best way to hide large amounts of cash.
#13140520 - 09/02/10 09:23 PM (13 years, 6 months ago) |
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Let's say someone lives in an apartment. They see large amounts of cash coming in to their hands. They have almost no guests but they are doing something illegal in their apartment, and they know that if for some reason they were to ever get busted, their large amounts of cash would probably be confiscated. How/Where do you think they should hide their money?
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Mushroomninja
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Pandor]
#13140578 - 09/02/10 09:39 PM (13 years, 6 months ago) |
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In an apartment...I wouldn't. Store it off site for sure. I like to bowling ally locker idea. Whatever you do don't involve banks or any other place that involves a paper trail.
-------------------- I am said to be a revolutionist in my sympathies, by birth, by breeding, and by principle. I am always on the side of the revolutionist, because there never was a revolution unless there were some oppressive and intolerable conditions against which to revolt.- Mark Twain
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Asante
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Pandor] 1
#13188165 - 09/13/10 06:07 AM (13 years, 6 months ago) |
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Im not going to go into things illegal but if you really have to hide something that doesnt set off metal detectors, a length of ABS drain pipe, 2 end caps, pipe glue, piece of sandpaper and a shovel come to mind.
Bury it several places where you can find it again.
If you are going for longer term compact wealth storage 1 oz gold bullion coins come to mind. A roll of em the size of a flashlight battery is ten thousand dollars nowadays. thats a smaller space by volume than a 100 pack of 100 dollar bills.
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nice1
Not the droid your looking for
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Asante] 1
#13188292 - 09/13/10 07:22 AM (13 years, 6 months ago) |
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Or make some fake piping under the sink or put it inside of some electrical equiptment.
Theres an e book thread in the pub that has an e book with loads of really clever places in the home to hide things.
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Stonehenge
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: nice1]
#13189854 - 09/13/10 03:03 PM (13 years, 6 months ago) |
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Safe deposit box is fine. They need a court order to go into it and that is hard to get. You can't open one in someone elses name. They can open one and let you use it but then if your loot is gone... who ya gonna call?
Gold is good, i just happen to have some. Do NOT leave it in an apartment. In addition to cops, there are other thieves around.
Declare some money each year from a legit business like yard work or whatever. Then you can deposit that much and after a few years you have a nice chunk in there.
-------------------- “A democracy cannot exist as a permanent form of government. It can only exist until the voters discover that they can vote themselves largesse from the public treasury. From that moment on, the majority always votes for the candidates promising the most benefits from the public treasury with the result that a democracy always collapses over loose fiscal policy, always followed by a dictatorship.” (attributed to Alexis de Tocqueville political philosopher Circa 1835) Trade list http://www.shroomery.org/forums/showflat.php/Number/18047755
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bcstoner
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Stonehenge]
#13192016 - 09/13/10 10:30 PM (13 years, 6 months ago) |
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Safety deposit box is good. You can request no one be in the room while you put the money in the box. Or you can go to a casino and gamble it. I've heard that a lot of people laundry money that way and you can still be legit. It will all look like winnings to the IRS.
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Stonehenge
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: bcstoner]
#13193359 - 09/14/10 09:26 AM (13 years, 6 months ago) |
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Sure, you can run it through a casino and ask for a check. The casino keeps pretty close tabs on stuff like that, plus you might lose money. Better to claim you have a business and declare profits each year. Say you sold stuff at flea markets or had a lot of garage sales. Or that you had a cash business doing tree work, yard work, etc etc. Pay a little taxes and in a few years you have tax paid cash in the bank you can invest. Plus you pay all your bills in cash so it doesn't show up. Buy someone's winning lotto ticket, dog or horse track ticket, etc. People will pay you a percentage to do it. Give them $550 for a $600 winning ticket. You pay taxes and it's all legit. Many places they take out 20% for taxes when it's over a certain amount. Offer to cash it for 10% less than face, you cash it and pay the 20% and you might even get a little refund on your taxes.
The irs does not look that closely at money which is reported unless its a huge amount. Cash deposits over 10k must be reported on a special form and banks do voluntary reports on deposits over about 1 or 2k. Make cash deposits every week for 300 to 800 and no one will lift an eyebrow. Buying a money order for 1k or more will run into some problems or buying several at a time which add up to more than 1k. Keep it small and fly under the radar.
-------------------- “A democracy cannot exist as a permanent form of government. It can only exist until the voters discover that they can vote themselves largesse from the public treasury. From that moment on, the majority always votes for the candidates promising the most benefits from the public treasury with the result that a democracy always collapses over loose fiscal policy, always followed by a dictatorship.” (attributed to Alexis de Tocqueville political philosopher Circa 1835) Trade list http://www.shroomery.org/forums/showflat.php/Number/18047755
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FilamentousFungi
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Stonehenge] 1
#13300118 - 10/06/10 06:12 PM (13 years, 5 months ago) |
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Trade that $$$$$ for grams of fluff.
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UniversalParadox
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Pandor]
#13304305 - 10/07/10 02:35 PM (13 years, 5 months ago) |
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Buy gold and bury in a deep hole.
-------------------- xM�� � �V� �c�R��H�P
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LC89
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Buy them in gold then put them in diaper bags.
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4-19-43 420
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: LC89]
#13343268 - 10/16/10 09:41 AM (13 years, 5 months ago) |
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just send it all to me and ill take care of it for you.
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ChuangTzu
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Asante]
#13343822 - 10/16/10 12:29 PM (13 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
Wiccan_Seeker said: If you are going for longer term compact wealth storage 1 oz gold bullion coins come to mind. A roll of em the size of a flashlight battery is ten thousand dollars nowadays. thats a smaller space by volume than a 100 pack of 100 dollar bills.
Would be cheaper to buy 500EUR notes and roll them up.
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Asante
Omnicyclion prophet
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: ChuangTzu]
#13347127 - 10/17/10 07:24 AM (13 years, 5 months ago) |
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The euro's going down too.
I think it's utterly ridiculous that theres no such thing as a $1000 bill. I mean in the grand scheme of things $100 is small change nowadays.
What convincing can 10 bills of 100 do that a 1000 bill cannot? Counterfeiting is a bullshit argument, counterfeiting a stack of 100s would be just as hard. People who want to pay in cash are doing it anyway, its just less convenient to do so.
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Edited by Asante (10/17/10 07:25 AM)
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whosthewalrus
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Asante] 1
#13347134 - 10/17/10 07:30 AM (13 years, 5 months ago) |
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I hide my cash inside the computer.
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LobsterSauce
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: whosthewalrus]
#13347147 - 10/17/10 07:38 AM (13 years, 5 months ago) |
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I don't know the situation regarding banks over there but maybe go to several and get large denomination bills i.e. $500 bills.
I'm not sure would they look at you funny at the bank and I don't know how much a figure would be acceptable before they did look at you funny.
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Asante
Omnicyclion prophet
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: LobsterSauce]
#13347310 - 10/17/10 08:52 AM (13 years, 5 months ago) |
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Worth about $700 in US dollars. It was about $600 last month.
The euro is shit like the dollar, it just comes in bigger denominations.
I rather swap two of those against one of these:
In case you don't know it, it's an American Gold Eagle. Actual money in the US, just not the kind you are used to.
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Edited by Asante (10/17/10 08:56 AM)
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ChuangTzu
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Asante]
#13347812 - 10/17/10 11:30 AM (13 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
Wiccan_Seeker said: I think it's utterly ridiculous that theres no such thing as a $1000 bill. I mean in the grand scheme of things $100 is small change nowadays.
I agree.
The started taking higher-denomination bills out of circulation in the late 60s, at which point $100 was worth almost $600 in today's money. Would be nice to have at least a $500 bill to partially make up for inflation.
The 1000CHF note is worth over $1000 (about $1040 or so)... And it looks pretty nice too:
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Darwin23
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: ChuangTzu]
#13352873 - 10/18/10 02:45 PM (13 years, 5 months ago) |
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Not in the apartment. If the cops were to search it, they'd find it.
-------------------- Take a look at my journal
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Scott Bennett
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Pandor] 2
#24789109 - 11/17/17 10:15 AM (6 years, 4 months ago) |
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Did you not see the warning about bumping pointless threads from 7 years ago?
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It's just some nights, you really want to go out, get some hot bitch to dump Goose down your throat and snort coke off a stripper's tits.
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xzylocybin
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Scott Bennett] 1
#24789134 - 11/17/17 10:28 AM (6 years, 4 months ago) |
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Put it somewhere nobody would think to look
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Near Dylan
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Asante]
#24789144 - 11/17/17 10:32 AM (6 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
Asante said:.
If you are going for longer term compact wealth storage 1 oz gold bullion coins come to mind. A roll of em the size of a flashlight battery is ten thousand dollars nowadays. thats a smaller space by volume than a 100 pack of 100 dollar bills.
"When I think about safe money, the only thing I see thats safe is solid gold bars, just like looney tunes"
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Asante
Omnicyclion prophet
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Near Dylan]
#24797222 - 11/21/17 06:13 AM (6 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
Near Dylan said:
"When I think about safe money, the only thing I see thats safe is solid gold bars, just like looney tunes"
Do you see me saying:
Quote:
Worth about $700 in US dollars. It was about $600 last month.
Had you gotten on board then, your $700 coins would be worth $1400 today, and noine would be the wiser.
Loony tunes, huh? You would have doubled every cent you had put in if you had listened to that while absolutely not doing ab damn thing but wait.
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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howsyournaggerdoin
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Asante] 1
#24797425 - 11/21/17 09:29 AM (6 years, 4 months ago) |
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If you wouldve invested in bitcoins in juli 2010 your $700 would be worth $96,827,800 now and you wouldve gained ~$1383.25 for every cent you put in while not doing a damn thing
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xzylocybin
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If you had used that money to move to california in 1848 and start a prospecting claim you would have made a fortune in gold
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Asante
Omnicyclion prophet
Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 87,296
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Quote:
howsyournaggerdoin said: If you wouldve invested in bitcoins in juli 2010 your $700 would be worth $96,827,800 now and you wouldve gained ~$1383.25 for every cent you put in while not doing a damn thing
hindsight.. 20/20
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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encryptor
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Asante]
#24806754 - 11/26/17 01:18 AM (6 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
Asante said:
Quote:
howsyournaggerdoin said: If you wouldve invested in bitcoins in juli 2010 your $700 would be worth $96,827,800 now and you wouldve gained ~$1383.25 for every cent you put in while not doing a damn thing
hindsight.. 20/20
I regret not getting into it then, but everything I heard about bitcoin was related to the silkroad and the dark web. It was confusing to invest in bitcoin wasn’t it? You need a virtual wallet and idk it’s not a normal stock that can purchase at Tradescott is it? Can bitcoinn be loaded onto prepaid credit cards??
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Near Dylan
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Asante]
#24806995 - 11/26/17 07:06 AM (6 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
Asante said:
Quote:
Near Dylan said:
"When I think about safe money, the only thing I see thats safe is solid gold bars, just like looney tunes"
Do you see me saying:
Quote:
Worth about $700 in US dollars. It was about $600 last month.
Had you gotten on board then, your $700 coins would be worth $1400 today, and noine would be the wiser.
Loony tunes, huh? You would have doubled every cent you had put in if you had listened to that while absolutely not doing ab damn thing but wait.
1:22
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Asante
Omnicyclion prophet
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Near Dylan]
#24808892 - 11/27/17 03:15 AM (6 years, 3 months ago) |
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Ah didn't catch the reference, my bad.
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LogicaL Chaos
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: xzylocybin]
#24827279 - 12/05/17 07:13 AM (6 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
xzylocybin said: Put it somewhere nobody would think to look
JK.
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xzylocybin
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: LogicaL Chaos]
#24831166 - 12/07/17 02:00 AM (6 years, 3 months ago) |
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Try burning it, it will be much easier to conceal in the form of ash
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LogicaL Chaos
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: xzylocybin]
#24833530 - 12/08/17 08:14 AM (6 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
xzylocybin said: Try burning it, it will be much easier to conceal in the form of ash
And thats how u put the Ash, back in Cash.
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Asante
Omnicyclion prophet
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: LogicaL Chaos]
#24835231 - 12/09/17 06:19 AM (6 years, 3 months ago) |
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See this?
Its a 400 troy ounce LMBA Good Delivery bar of 999 grade (23 carat) Gold.
That's literally half a million dollars right there.
You could shove it under your couch and if your house burns down you can retrieve it from the ashes, no worse for wear.
You gotta admit, that's damn convenient.
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Near Dylan
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Asante]
#24835253 - 12/09/17 06:42 AM (6 years, 3 months ago) |
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Asante no one wants to invest half a million dollars into a gold bar, shut up
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Asante
Omnicyclion prophet
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Near Dylan]
#24835274 - 12/09/17 07:03 AM (6 years, 3 months ago) |
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That was surprisingly rude.
The thread's topic is how to conveniently hide a large amount of wealth for whatever reason.
Hide it in stacks of dollars and the wealth contained within them dwindles by the day. Hide it in diamonds and you're at the mercy of DeBeers and while you have excellent portability (a 5 carat diamond worth half a million weighs 1 gram and measures less than 1/2 inch across) its not very liquid, while every man and his dog takes gold.
For the past 7,000 years it has ALWAYS been a good idea to hide wealth as gold. One ounce of gold bought a Senator's Toga in the roman empire and an Armani business suit in the current empire.
It's a great store of value.
I made this image in 2006 when we were hyping gold:
Its the same 400 oz bars, just a different model.
Back then those 12 bars were $2,700,000 or $225,000 apiece.
Today they are or $6,000,000 for the stack of 12 or $500,000 apiece.
If that was your money and instead of hiding stacks of benjamins you decided to take my advise and store these clunkers, at this point you'd be giving me a $3,300,000 blow job for the profit you made over holding cash, and if they had in the inbetween years released a dollar with improved security features you'd have no problem with exchanging hidden old paper for new paper.
Let's revisit this topic in 2026 to see what the same stack is worth back then: Protip: Its gonna be more than $12,000,000 ahnd maybe dollars as we know it have become obsolete because of gyperinflation, in which case your benjamins make toiletpaper and the gold stack will be merrily exchanged in a lot of whatever new coin they think of next. Why do I say "over 12 million" so confidently? Because they are printing dollars out the wazoo which will only render the dollar less valuable.
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Near Dylan
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Asante]
#24835284 - 12/09/17 07:20 AM (6 years, 3 months ago) |
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Stop convincing me that solid gold is a good investment with all your reasonable and persuasive arguments, you fuck. I wonder if this is common with wealthy people.
"Mortimer, how do you store your money? I research the safest banks and make sure I dont put all my eggs into one basket. How about you?"
"I bought millions of dollars worth of solid gold bars and put em under my bed"
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Asante
Omnicyclion prophet
Registered: 02/06/02
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Near Dylan]
#24835296 - 12/09/17 07:33 AM (6 years, 3 months ago) |
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This isn't an investment thread, this is a hiding wealth thread.
If you wanted to invest a large amount of money there are way better options, but hiding it, so no one know, for years, and if OP is so lucky, living off it? Precious metals become interesting. Platinum is at a bargain price right now, its actually cheaper than gold!
I'm very far from rich by the way. I'm not among the 1.2 billion people in this world who takes vacations - at all.
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Near Dylan
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Asante]
#24835300 - 12/09/17 07:35 AM (6 years, 3 months ago) |
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I would he spen the gold? Wouldn't he have to sell the bars anyway?
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Asante
Omnicyclion prophet
Registered: 02/06/02
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Near Dylan]
#24835321 - 12/09/17 07:50 AM (6 years, 3 months ago) |
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Yes but gold is very liquid, every man and his dog takes gold. You can sell Muslim gold to a Jew and Jewish gold to a Muslim, gold is a language that transcends friend or foe. Gold talks louder than money, worldwide. Those bars are a bit ridiculous of course, i can hardly imagine his e-juice mailorder business is that lucerative , rather than a 400oz bar he'd do much better to get 400 1oz gold coins, lets say 20 rolls of 20 1oz Gold American Eagles.
Let's focus on a roll of 20 1oz gold bulion coins:
1 such roll represents roughly 20 x $1250 = $25,000 which is a compact convenient unit of wealth. See the size of that roll? That's a snazzy car right there, fits right in your hand too.
Tons of companies and private individuals buy such coins, often paying cash and many require no ID.
One could attempt to fill such a roll, and if business is even better, fill boxes of rolls and if one needs currency one simply exchanges however many 1oz gold krugs, maples or eagles one wants for the cash one needs at the time.
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xzylocybin
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Near Dylan] 1
#24835553 - 12/09/17 10:05 AM (6 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Near Dylan said: Stop convincing me that solid gold is a good investment with all your reasonable and persuasive arguments, you fuck. I wonder if this is common with wealthy people.
"Mortimer, how do you store your money? I research the safest banks and make sure I dont put all my eggs into one basket. How about you?"
"I bought millions of dollars worth of solid gold bars and put em under my bed"
They acyually do, it sounds crazy but they have credit cards made out of gold, when you use them some of your gold shares are sold, and you can withdraw the actual metal instead of cash. Some super rich investment guy on the joe rogan podcast was showing his off.
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Stonehenge
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: xzylocybin]
#24835621 - 12/09/17 10:36 AM (6 years, 3 months ago) |
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they will do the same with btc, just a matter of time
-------------------- “A democracy cannot exist as a permanent form of government. It can only exist until the voters discover that they can vote themselves largesse from the public treasury. From that moment on, the majority always votes for the candidates promising the most benefits from the public treasury with the result that a democracy always collapses over loose fiscal policy, always followed by a dictatorship.” (attributed to Alexis de Tocqueville political philosopher Circa 1835) Trade list http://www.shroomery.org/forums/showflat.php/Number/18047755
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LogicaL Chaos
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Near Dylan]
#24836101 - 12/09/17 02:17 PM (6 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Near Dylan said: Asante no one wants to invest half a million dollars into a gold bar, shut up
Telling an Admin to shut up?
Always a wise move bud.
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ApostleofAzathoth
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Re: Best way to hide large amounts of cash. [Re: Pandor]
#24840009 - 12/11/17 04:59 PM (6 years, 3 months ago) |
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Spend it on guns so that you can go out with a bang!
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