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MOTH
Wild Woman
Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
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Re: open relationships [Re: yogabunny]
#12587638 - 05/18/10 06:02 PM (13 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
yogabunny said: my friends who do it are my age, aka late 20's.
they've been together forever though and have obviously done what you say: reflected on why it is they seek pleasure outside of their relationship, and it works for them.
That's awesome. I'm glad it's working out for them. Have you talked to them about it? What do they say about the secret of maintaining their relationship while they are off playing with other people? Are they both involved with each inclusion?
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uncivilBANKS
Registered: 05/14/08
Posts: 836
Last seen: 13 years, 9 months
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Yeah man i noticed a great quote in a chat room the other day "What you don't see won't hurt you" "If you're looking be prepared to see what you don't want to...sometimes it's better to close your eyes and be true to those who will always truly love you"
everyone suspects their lover of doing things behind their back so I have found after many years that revealing every detail of your day regardless if they do is always better for you...you observe their expression the WHOLE time, if they cringe that means they may be cheating on you reminding themselves of their encounters but who knows..it's easy to read them, if they're not honest with you 100+% leave them
Edited by uncivilBANKS (05/18/10 06:03 PM)
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yogabunny
fancy cat
Registered: 11/01/09
Posts: 11,281
Loc: Nasty Women Get Shit Done
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Re: open relationships [Re: MOTH]
#12587646 - 05/18/10 06:03 PM (13 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
MOTH said: I also feel like cultural conditioning is what has made the open relationship thing pretty hard to maintain. If we all had less ego collectively it wouldn't be as difficult.
also a lot of people find their sense of self worth and happiness, through their intimate relationships. so if the other person wants to seek pleasure elsewhere, that lessens their self esteem, and then enters the jealousy/drama.
sigh.
all relationships would be in better shape if we could all have less collective ego. it starts with just simply being honest and truthful with oneself, but oftentimes that's the hardest step....
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audiophoenix
Find Peace
Registered: 08/28/09
Posts: 4,107
Loc: Upstate NY
Last seen: 2 years, 11 months
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Re: open relationships [Re: yogabunny]
#12587666 - 05/18/10 06:06 PM (13 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
yogabunny said:
Quote:
MOTH said: I also feel like cultural conditioning is what has made the open relationship thing pretty hard to maintain. If we all had less ego collectively it wouldn't be as difficult.
also a lot of people find their sense of self worth and happiness, through their intimate relationships. so if the other person wants to seek pleasure elsewhere, that lessens their self esteem, and then enters the jealousy/drama.
sigh.
all relationships would be in better shape if we could all have less collective ego. it starts with just simply being honest and truthful with oneself, but oftentimes that's the hardest step....
Agreed fully
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uncivilBANKS
Registered: 05/14/08
Posts: 836
Last seen: 13 years, 9 months
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Re: open relationships [Re: yogabunny]
#12587689 - 05/18/10 06:09 PM (13 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
yogabunny said:
Quote:
MOTH said: I also feel like cultural conditioning is what has made the open relationship thing pretty hard to maintain. If we all had less ego collectively it wouldn't be as difficult.
also a lot of people find their sense of self worth and happiness, through their intimate relationships. so if the other person wants to seek pleasure elsewhere, that lessens their self esteem, and then enters the jealousy/drama.
sigh.
all relationships would be in better shape if we could all have less collective ego. it starts with just simply being honest and truthful with oneself, but oftentimes that's the hardest step....
yes, i am always 100% honest and i always have been with things that i know matter, even if your significant other was cheating why woudn't they tell you??? i personally would know right away i can smell liars a mile away and i can also smell people holding their thoughts back two miles away. if the person is not telling you that means she's afraid you will leave her, BUT SHE's ASKING FOR IT!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Breakfast Crew
Cheerios
Registered: 01/20/09
Posts: 1,985
Last seen: 12 years, 8 months
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Re: open relationships [Re: bootedboy]
#12587695 - 05/18/10 06:10 PM (13 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
bootedboy said: Yeah a relationship where you sleep with other people is fucked up.
Dad, where's mom? Shes fucking the neighbor, i'll be making meatloaf tonight honey.
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uncivilBANKS
Registered: 05/14/08
Posts: 836
Last seen: 13 years, 9 months
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Quote:
Breakfast Crew said:
Quote:
bootedboy said: Yeah a relationship where you sleep with other people is fucked up.
Dad, where's mom? Shes fucking the neighbor, i'll be making meatloaf tonight honey.
an hour later she starts throwing up violently and gasping for breath as her last moments dawn on her....
no but really, this is serious business
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makaveli8x8
Stranger
Registered: 02/28/06
Posts: 21,636
Last seen: 7 years, 10 months
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Quote:
audiophoenix said:
Quote:
makaveli8x8 said: they just have so much sex that they become immune to std's, its a trade secret blend of flora
So I guess you believed your girlfriend when she said she fucked around so much that she was immune to STDs?
actually my last girlfriend was back in highschool, and the only time STD's were mentioned was when her last boyfriend mentioned she had herpies, and then about a month later she mentioned something about how the school was having her do a speech on std's
-------------------- We were sent to hell for eternity Øh® We play on earth to pass the time Over-population the root of all Evil-brings the Elites Closer to the gates.
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fapjack
Title
Registered: 07/26/07
Posts: 16,574
Loc: Central New Jersey
Last seen: 4 years, 1 month
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Re: open relationships [Re: yogabunny]
#12587742 - 05/18/10 06:18 PM (13 years, 10 months ago) |
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They usually don't work out, I know swingers and they all say that. People that want to fuck other people usually have a reason more than just sex.
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dr_gonz
Registered: 08/18/03
Posts: 44,654
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deCypher
Registered: 02/10/08
Posts: 56,232
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Re: open relationships [Re: fapjack]
#12587760 - 05/18/10 06:21 PM (13 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
fapjack said: People that want to fuck other people usually have a reason more than just sex.
What do you mean?
-------------------- We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
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Solemente
Registered: 04/24/09
Posts: 4,337
Loc:
Last seen: 3 years, 2 months
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Re: open relationships [Re: fapjack]
#12587763 - 05/18/10 06:21 PM (13 years, 10 months ago) |
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Everyone that I know that has tried this has had their relationship end in disaster.
They were all in their early 20's too, so I can't speak for any other age group.
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uncivilBANKS
Registered: 05/14/08
Posts: 836
Last seen: 13 years, 9 months
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Re: open relationships [Re: fapjack]
#12587770 - 05/18/10 06:22 PM (13 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
fapjack said: They usually don't work out, I know swingers and they all say that. People that want to fuck other people usually have a reason more than just sex.
they NEVER work out because even if they say their not jealous...they really are, it's impossible not to be unless you admit you're a cumdumpster whore who fucks every guy you come in contact with
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dr_gonz
Registered: 08/18/03
Posts: 44,654
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fapjack
Title
Registered: 07/26/07
Posts: 16,574
Loc: Central New Jersey
Last seen: 4 years, 1 month
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Re: open relationships [Re: deCypher]
#12587784 - 05/18/10 06:24 PM (13 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Mr. Cypher said:
Quote:
fapjack said: People that want to fuck other people usually have a reason more than just sex.
What do you mean?
Self esteem issues, sexuality issues, trying to find love, etc. It is different for everyone, but most people don't just want to fuck a billion different females. Then again I don't know what the fuck I want so don't take my advice.
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deCypher
Registered: 02/10/08
Posts: 56,232
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Re: open relationships [Re: fapjack]
#12587791 - 05/18/10 06:25 PM (13 years, 10 months ago) |
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I can't wait till they create female sexbots.
-------------------- We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
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uncivilBANKS
Registered: 05/14/08
Posts: 836
Last seen: 13 years, 9 months
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Re: open relationships [Re: dr_gonz]
#12587798 - 05/18/10 06:26 PM (13 years, 10 months ago) |
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^^^heheheheh lol, the clothing part only applies to me....except u have to expand that to energy everywher..
Edited by uncivilBANKS (05/18/10 06:28 PM)
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yogabunny
fancy cat
Registered: 11/01/09
Posts: 11,281
Loc: Nasty Women Get Shit Done
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Re: open relationships [Re: MOTH]
#12587799 - 05/18/10 06:26 PM (13 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
MOTH said:
That's awesome. I'm glad it's working out for them. Have you talked to them about it? What do they say about the secret of maintaining their relationship while they are off playing with other people? Are they both involved with each inclusion?
i haven't had a chance to talk to them about it. but as i understand it they are both bisexual, and "see" other partners together and separately. i'll pick their brains more when i have the chance.
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fapjack
Title
Registered: 07/26/07
Posts: 16,574
Loc: Central New Jersey
Last seen: 4 years, 1 month
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Re: open relationships [Re: yogabunny]
#12587814 - 05/18/10 06:28 PM (13 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
yogabunny said:
Quote:
MOTH said:
That's awesome. I'm glad it's working out for them. Have you talked to them about it? What do they say about the secret of maintaining their relationship while they are off playing with other people? Are they both involved with each inclusion?
i haven't had a chance to talk to them about it. but as i understand it they are both bisexual, and "see" other partners together and separately. i'll pick their brains more when i have the chance.
3 way?
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Sci-Fi
OG
Registered: 02/28/10
Posts: 1,232
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Re: open relationships [Re: yogabunny]
#12587822 - 05/18/10 06:29 PM (13 years, 10 months ago) |
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It works for many people I know and it doesn't work for many people I know.
If you don't want to be in an open relationship you shouldn't be in one. If you don't want to be in one then you shouldn't be in one.
I'm really surprised to see people on this site setting rules on what other people should be doing with their personal lives that don't effect anyone else.
It's hard for me to understand why two people that are happy should change their lives just so others can better understand it.
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