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Anonymous #1

What's The Best Way To Talk To My Wife About Anal
    #12389442 - 04/14/10 12:16 AM (13 years, 11 months ago)

When we started dating, I once tried to casually slip it in, but she immediately yapped at me "What the fuck do you think you're doing?"

This is something I really want to do, but I'm almost positive my wife will be horrified with the idea.

For the women on here, here's a couple questions for you:

1. Do women like anal?
2. What's the best way to approach a woman about anal?

Please state that you're a woman when replying, your answer will carry more credibility.


Everyone else is more than welcome to reply as well.

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Anonymous #1

Re: What's The Best Way To Talk To My Wife About Anal [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #12392022 - 04/14/10 01:04 PM (13 years, 11 months ago)

50 views and not one reply?

Is anal sex uncommon or something? I thought lots of people did it.

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Anonymous #2

Re: What's The Best Way To Talk To My Wife About Anal [Re: Anonymous #1] * 1
    #12392078 - 04/14/10 01:11 PM (13 years, 11 months ago)

I'm a woman and anal isn't the greatest experience ever, but it's not all that bad either. 

You'll need lots of lube, poke one finger slowly in, then another, until her butthole relaxes and you can start guiding your dick in. 

As for how to talk to her about it, I would just sit her down and tell her that this is something you'd really like to try and that you'll be gentle w/ her bum if she'll just trust it to you.

Have you done anal to a woman before?  Idk, as a woman a dick in the vagina is a lot more sexy.

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Anonymous #1

Re: What's The Best Way To Talk To My Wife About Anal [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #12392132 - 04/14/10 01:19 PM (13 years, 11 months ago)

I've only done anal with one other girl and that was someone I dated before I met my wife.

She actually enjoyed anal and it was her suggestion that we start doing it. This is why I'm so confused as to why my wife responded in horror to it, but the first girl I dated loved it.

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Offlinefeifen
Registered: 10/18/08
Posts: 7,040
Last seen: 13 years, 2 months
Re: What's The Best Way To Talk To My Wife About Anal [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #12393318 - 04/14/10 04:30 PM (13 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
I've only done anal with one other girl and that was someone I dated before I met my wife.

She actually enjoyed anal and it was her suggestion that we start doing it. This is why I'm so confused as to why my wife responded in horror to it, but the first girl I dated loved it.




Ask yourself this,

Does the idea of a <insert the size of your penis> long dick in your ass sound pleasant? If so, you may be gay. If you said no, the odds are is that she feels the same way as you.

I personally think its nasty to stick my dick in her pooper, but I've done it before just to try it out a few times and have concluded the vagina works just as well.

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OfflineMushroomTrip
Dr. Teasy Thighs
Female User Gallery


Registered: 12/02/05
Posts: 14,794
Loc: red panda village
Last seen: 3 years, 24 days
Re: What's The Best Way To Talk To My Wife About Anal [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #12393417 - 04/14/10 04:47 PM (13 years, 11 months ago)

Some women like it, others don't. It's really just as simple as that.
Maybe she just has some misconceptions regarding anal sex, and I think that just talking to her about this should work, at least it will help you figure out what she thinks. You could buy a book an anal sex too, so you can read it together.


--------------------
:bunny::bunnyhug:
All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

:bunnyhug: :yinyang2:

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Anonymous #3

Re: What's The Best Way To Talk To My Wife About Anal [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #12393468 - 04/14/10 04:56 PM (13 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
When we started dating, I once tried to casually slip it in, but she immediately yapped at me "What the fuck do you think you're doing?"

This is something I really want to do, but I'm almost positive my wife will be horrified with the idea.




Have you and your wife ever talked about sexual fantasies together?

Certainly, during the act isn't the time to negotiate something like that - you try it, she objects, you don't try it again during sex. (trying it the first time is good, take action, then respond to the results with conversation during a low-emotion time)

I'm not much for anal myself (and yes, I'm a woman), but like any other sexual preference, it's just a preference, nothing more.  The one boyfriend I had who enjoyed it let me know he wanted it and then let me make the decision of when it could happen, and didn't push me to try to convince me in between.

When I offered it, he took it excitedly and we had a great time that night.  However, I still don't really "like" it all that much so if we were still together he wouldn't be getting it that often.  It doesn't bring me pleasure personally.

The fact that this is your WIFE and you haven't already taken the time to talk about sexual fetishes such as this is concerning.  Hopefully this is very early in your relationship and you'll have many fruitful and sexually fulfilling discussions about sexual fantasies to share with one another, though!

So, in short:  Talk to her about sexual fantasies and fetishes, and see where it goes from there, but accept that if she really doesn't like it, you may be S.O.L.

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OfflineHumility
Working on it
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Registered: 10/07/08
Posts: 6,745
Last seen: 7 years, 1 month
Re: What's The Best Way To Talk To My Wife About Anal [Re: Anonymous #3]
    #12393683 - 04/14/10 05:43 PM (13 years, 11 months ago)

I dunno, I've never had "successful" anal sex in that I busted a nut in her ass, and honestly I think I'm past that.

Regardless of what other people here say, there has ALWAYS been poo involved.  Not as if someone just took a shit, but it's pretty fucking obvious that you're toying with a shit receptacle/container while you're doing what you're doing.  Every time I've had anal sex I 100% without question SMELLED feces.  I have NEVER eaten my girl's asshole (except for MAYBE licking the outside (and that's a BIG maybe) by accident during some intense 69ing or something.

Shit is pretty gross and also fairly unsanitary.  I'm prolly gonna abstain in the future.

I much prefer for her to dress up in stockings for me.  Stocking fetish for the win.


--------------------

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InvisibleChiefGreenLeaf
Registered: 01/11/07
Posts: 1,596
Re: What's The Best Way To Talk To My Wife About Anal [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #12393764 - 04/14/10 06:03 PM (13 years, 11 months ago)

My girlfriend was begging for anal. They defiantly like it, but it's not like what youre used to. GO SLOW. My last girlfriend was never into anything being near her anus. The one I got now does, idk?

You should first try to energize your sex life and make her more orgasmic before she will want to do something like this. I suggest adaptogenic, aphrodisiac herbs like....

ashwaghanda
maral root
maca root
shatvatari
epimedium
Tribulus terrestris
Mucuna Pruriens
Damiana
Siberian Ginseng


Look up some ones for her to take to, I think she could take most of these.

I don't think anyone really understands what these plants do when used TOGETHER. It supercharges your sexual potency. This is the stuff thats in all the ex-tenze and enzyte pills that make your dick grow.

They do wonders for the body's hormones and nervous system. So once you can get your wife FEELING like she wants something more from sex but can't put her finger on it suggest anal. Maybe start by conversation a couple days before about dirty fantasies of being fucked in the ass, see how she responds.

Just flow with it man. But seriously this isnt gonna happen overnight. You will have to put some work in.

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Anonymous #1

Re: What's The Best Way To Talk To My Wife About Anal [Re: ChiefGreenLeaf]
    #12394218 - 04/14/10 07:21 PM (13 years, 11 months ago)

Just finished talking to my wife about it and she's agreed to it, she's just worried that it's going to make her constipated.

This is beginning to feel like it's more work than it's worth.

I guess this question can apply to gay men as well as the women on here. Does anal sex compact the poop in your butt and make you constipated?

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OfflineHumility
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Re: What's The Best Way To Talk To My Wife About Anal [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #12394393 - 04/14/10 07:51 PM (13 years, 11 months ago)

Sounds like you two don't understand enough about anatomy.  Poop isn't anywhere near your sphincter except when you're evacuating.

Feces are stored in the intestines and colon, and your dick isn't long enough to be packin' puddin'.

There will be plenty of poop residue and poop sticking to the walls of her colon and rectum.  Well, not plenty, but certainly enough to smell poop in my experience.

I highly recommend a shower, and cleaning thoroughly beforehand.  An enema is pretty exaggerated, but washing her asshole with water and a dab of soap would be completely appropriate.


--------------------

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OfflinePDU
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Re: What's The Best Way To Talk To My Wife About Anal [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #12394935 - 04/14/10 09:07 PM (13 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
Does anal sex compact the poop in your butt and make you constipated?




Ok think of it this way - do you know when you have to shit?

I do, and your wife should too.

The poo is up inside the body, not in rectum unless it is ready to be relieved, therefore - there should be no poo mashing.

Quote:

This is beginning to feel like it's more work than it's worth.




I don't understand how you could say that. Really, talking about sexual desires and finding a way to make them work .. too much work. BAH.


--------------------
GO OUTSIDE.

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InvisibleIcelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery
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Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
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Re: What's The Best Way To Talk To My Wife About Anal [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #12395233 - 04/14/10 09:59 PM (13 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
When we started dating, I once tried to casually slip it in, but she immediately yapped at me "What the fuck do you think you're doing?"

This is something I really want to do, but I'm almost positive my wife will be horrified with the idea.

For the women on here, here's a couple questions for you:

1. Do women like anal?
2. What's the best way to approach a woman about anal?

Please state that you're a woman when replying, your answer will carry more credibility.


Everyone else is more than welcome to reply as well.





In my experience some like it and some don't. It's been about fifty fifty for me. I'm not that big a fan actually but I love licking ass and that's the way to get the wife into it if its gonna happen.


--------------------
"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC

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Anonymous #4

Re: What's The Best Way To Talk To My Wife About Anal [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #12395676 - 04/14/10 11:26 PM (13 years, 11 months ago)

Apparently in porn when they do an anal scene the girl usually uses a laxative or something beforehand to clear everything out.  Probably an enema also.

I've never tried it but I hear it's pretty nasty.  I personally wouldn't even want to unless the girl seriously cleaned up first.

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InvisibleWhiskeyClone
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Re: What's The Best Way To Talk To My Wife About Anal [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #12395973 - 04/15/10 12:39 AM (13 years, 11 months ago)

Lots of good information here but this is the un-sexiest thread ever :lol:


--------------------
Welcome evermore to gods and men is the self-helping man.  For him all doors are flung wide: him all tongues greet, all honors crown, all eyes follow with desire.  Our love goes out to him and embraces him, because he did not need it.

~ R.W. Emerson, "Self-Reliance"

:heartpump:

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Invisibleeligal
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Posts: 7,021
Loc: California
Re: What's The Best Way To Talk To My Wife About Anal [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #12396849 - 04/15/10 07:35 AM (13 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
I guess this question can apply to gay men as well as the women on here. Does anal sex compact the poop in your butt and make you constipated?




Dammit man...

You two seriously need to look up how to do this cleanly.
She needs to "empty" herself and then do an enema.
The enema is pretty important me thinks and its not difficult to do...

Damn you man, now I got these images in my head of some guy licking a chicks ass when she hasnt cleaned herself...  :scat:


--------------------
\m/ Spanksta \m/

"do you have the freedom to do with your nervous system what you want?"

"MolokoMilkPlus said:
I'll respect you if you let me give you a blow job"

"tactik said:
respect the can."


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Anonymous #5

Re: What's The Best Way To Talk To My Wife About Anal [Re: eligal]
    #12397042 - 04/15/10 08:47 AM (13 years, 11 months ago)

Lots of lube, they even make de-sensitizing ones. Although that no the best. You want her to know if its feels good OR bad.

First step. Talk

Second step, go slow. TRy doggystyle and maybe rub your lubed thumb on her anus til she responds in a good way.

Third, if she responds well, try a small object, maybe your finger (better trim your nails!!) Buy her a Bullet to try.

If that goes well, try the real deal. Let her ride you or push against you. Let her control the depth and the speed, at first.

Once you are all the way in, stay still and let her adjust. Now's a good time to rub her clit, get her excited til she forgets she has dick in her ass. I guarantee you she will start moving around and before you (or her) knows it, she will be howling and fucking you good!!!

Works for me???

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Offlinepothead_bob
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Registered: 04/12/08
Posts: 1,811
Loc: Your computer screen
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Re: What's The Best Way To Talk To My Wife About Anal [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #12397727 - 04/15/10 11:13 AM (13 years, 11 months ago)

I wouldn't have your heart set on certain outcomes when doing this for the first time.  I'm betting as soon as you start getting in there she's gonna feel like she needs to shit and won't be able to go all the way.  I've done it with my girlfriend before a few times.  We really got into it and did some hard fucking one time when she was menstrual.  The vag was a no-go and she was horny so she let me pop it in there.  I got in pretty quick, pounded her hard and even got to finish up.  But that was the only time we ever really got into it.  I'd recommend the desensitizing lube and a butt plug to gradually loosen her up at first. 

Actually, I think I hypnotized her that time and convinced her getting fucked in the ass felt better than having it in the pussy.  Seemed to work like a charm.  It was great to give it a try, but I prefer the front to the back.  It just feels better IMO.


--------------------
No knowledge can be certain, if it is not based
upon mathematics or upon some other knowledge
which is itself based upon the mathematical
sciences.
  -Leonardo da Vinci (1425-1519)

Speak well of your enemies.  After all, you made them.

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Invisiblepotgrrl
Tripper Grrl
Female


Registered: 01/14/10
Posts: 641
Re: What's The Best Way To Talk To My Wife About Anal [Re: Anonymous #5]
    #12407767 - 04/17/10 06:29 AM (13 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

SquaReSaltine said:
Lots of lube, they even make de-sensitizing ones. Although that no the best. You want her to know if its feels good OR bad.

First step. Talk

Second step, go slow. TRy doggystyle and maybe rub your lubed thumb on her anus til she responds in a good way.

Third, if she responds well, try a small object, maybe your finger (better trim your nails!!) Buy her a Bullet to try.

If that goes well, try the real deal. Let her ride you or push against you. Let her control the depth and the speed, at first.

Once you are all the way in, stay still and let her adjust. Now's a good time to rub her clit, get her excited til she forgets she has dick in her ass. I guarantee you she will start moving around and before you (or her) knows it, she will be howling and fucking you good!!!

Works for me???




This.

It's all about incrementally allowing her to get comfortable.

Once she's emotionally and physically comfortable with it the path will be faster :wink:

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InvisibleChronic7
Registered: 05/08/04
Posts: 13,679
Re: What's The Best Way To Talk To My Wife About Anal [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #12407788 - 04/17/10 06:49 AM (13 years, 11 months ago)

Slip a finger in first when your doing her doggystyle
If she doesn't like it she should tell you
One in the pink, one in the stink


--------------------

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