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I am going to take a break from drugs, for a long while. These past few weeks I have been hungover as much as high. I believe an altered state of consciousness is fun, but it has its tolls. I feel like shit, can't think straight, and I've lost all my motivation.
My spirit for life has worn thin, and I've been in and out of this world too much to distinguish between sobriety and insanity. Doing drugs for recreation has lost its luster, and I've decided to return to the mushroom and all it can teach me. From here on out, I will not doing anything but mushrooms, and those only in extreme moderation. If this works out, if I am able to fully withdraw from all drug use, I believe I will be fit to go under the guidance of datura.
I do not want to be a burn out, and this serves as a warning to all habitual drug users out there. I heard these warnings, I saw the deadbeats, and I did not take notice. Now I feel dead inside, I dearly want to be the person I was half a year ago. The battle against myself has begun, and I will do all I can to come out on top.
I used to go on binges for weeks doing alcohol, marijuana and methamphetamine, but I finally realized what was becoming of me. I lost absolutely all my motivation to the point of where I would not do anything and I put everything off till a later time at which I didn't do it. I then realized I didn't want to end up like many of the people I knew, and straight out stopped drinking and doing meth. This was years ago and I haven't done meth a single time since then. I also haven't gotten completely drunk more than once a week, except on holidays. My advice is not to plain out moderate what you do, but to keep the amount of drugs you are using at once to a minimum so you can be messed up for longer on a few drugs taken seperately than many drugs taken all at once.
I think it's just being in Aurora, I used to live there. There's drugs everywhere for some reason, but it's not really a ghetto. During my time there I got into alot of different drugs and got burnt out very quickly, mostly because I was a sucker for going into deals with my roomate for buying large quantaties of drugs.
The day after I moved out, I medatated for a whole day to get rid of that ugly feeling.
-------------------- What if everything around you
Isn't quite as it seems?
What if all the world you think you know,
Is an elaborate dream?
And if you look at your reflection,
Is it all you want it to be?