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OfflineUnparalized
Young Cardinal
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Registered: 08/24/09
Posts: 327
Loc: USA
Last seen: 11 years, 7 months
My Fire Always Burns out with the finish line in site!
    #11795078 - 01/09/10 09:54 AM (14 years, 1 month ago)

I am supposed to put together a Curriculum Vitae for my class, for those who do not know, this is like taking a resume and adding every detail to the paper that you could.  For most, i assume this is an easy task, but i have always fucked up everything in my life right b4 i finished it.  Its sort of like i am programmed to self-destruct just the time my eyes sight the goal.

I am a readmit with 100+ credit hours.  My ad-visor found it hard to believe i was even standing in his office after 5 years absence from education, but still was very happy.  I was a former 4.0 student, but i had let my recreational pastimes procure my life and withdrew in 2005.  I would have finished if not for the seizure, don't never ever ever take xanax for 3 months and then try to cold turkey it, you will have a very bad day :frown: 

So... i have no idea what the fuck my goal is.. I told my ad-visor i just want my BS in Bio and then let time take care of the rest.. The other students he is advising are interviewing with med schools, pharm schools, and post grad programs, all of which i am no longer  interested in.  I want to do biological research, preferable in the outside environment, but fuck all my classes are 350+ and 420+ levels.  I am having some serious stress and anxiety... I never once used to doubt myself when it came to "the books", but since removed from school, i just feel fucked...

I want to finish this race i started 9 years ago, and i dint care how it looks that i took a long fucking break.. I am tired of fucking Dr's judging me cause i am an alcoholic(sober 4.5 years now) telling me to try to apply to med school in a few more years, fuck em i don't want to go anyways.  We had a little pompas ass come in and go over his curriculum vitae and god he nonstop fluffed his ego at every step.

Hes in charge of the med school as well, so      "Fuck you Whale, Fuck you Dolphin"


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This Is All Just An Echo Of What Has All Ready Happened!

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Offlinetoday mylove
Male User Gallery


Registered: 12/04/04
Posts: 2,473
Last seen: 3 months, 6 days
Re: My Fire Always Burns out with the finish line in site! [Re: Unparalized]
    #11795146 - 01/09/10 10:07 AM (14 years, 1 month ago)

I had to write a CV yesterday and it made me feel weak. Don't let anyone let you feel that way. This includes yourself. Go fucking kick some ass. You are smart. And anyone who goes back to school after 5 years and get is done is a fucking champion. That's right. You are a champion.

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Invisiblebadchad
Mad Scientist

Registered: 03/02/05 Happy 19th Shroomiversary!
Posts: 13,374
Re: My Fire Always Burns out with the finish line in site! [Re: Unparalized]
    #11795166 - 01/09/10 10:11 AM (14 years, 1 month ago)

Sounds like you are over-analyzing a bit.  Keep it simple.

Figure out what it takes to finish up your BS, focus on that.  If you aren't absolutely sure about higher education, then don't even consider it.


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...the whole experience is (and is as) a profound piece of knowledge.  It is an indellible experience; it is forever known.  I have known myself in a way I doubt I would have ever occurred except as it did.

Smith, P.  Bull. Menninger Clinic (1959) 23:20-27; p. 27.

...most subjects find the experience valuable, some find it frightening, and many say that is it uniquely lovely.

Osmond, H.  Annals, NY Acad Science (1957) 66:418-434; p.436

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