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OfflineGomp
¡(Bound to·(O))be free!
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One of the best jokes ever.. (Please keep it to one per post..)
    #11396364 - 11/06/09 10:03 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

I'll start:

"A nurse walked by a patients room at the mental hospital.... She saw him standing with his dick in a jar of nuts.. Perplexed she asked him; What on earth are you doing? The patient calmly replied; I am fucking nuts!"


Pleas post your favorite joke?

Keep it simple, only one per post.. Shall be a fine collection of peoples humor, if all are so kind.. :smile:


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OfflineSolemente
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Registered: 04/24/09
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Re: One of the best jokes ever.. (Please keep it to one per post..) [Re: Gomp]
    #11396532 - 11/06/09 10:48 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

What's the difference between batman and a black man?





























Batman can go into a store without Robbin'


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InvisibleSwyfty Swyf
Shrugsy Shrugs


Registered: 02/20/09
Posts: 7,081
Loc: North Alabama
Re: One of the best jokes ever.. (Please keep it to one per post..) [Re: Gomp]
    #11396575 - 11/06/09 11:00 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

Your momma's glasses are so thick, she looked at a map and saw people waving at her.


--------------------
If you build it they will shrug.
:shrug:


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OfflineBrennus
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Re: One of the best jokes ever.. (Please keep it to one per post..) [Re: Swyfty Swyf]
    #11396638 - 11/06/09 11:14 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

Why did Princess Diana cross the road?






She wasn't wearing her seat belt.


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OfflineSolemente
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Re: One of the best jokes ever.. (Please keep it to one per post..) [Re: Brennus]
    #11396639 - 11/06/09 11:15 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

Quote:

Brennus said:
Why did Princess Diana cross the road?






She wasn't wearing her seat belt.



Ouch


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InvisibleSwyfty Swyf
Shrugsy Shrugs


Registered: 02/20/09
Posts: 7,081
Loc: North Alabama
Re: One of the best jokes ever.. (Please keep it to one per post..) [Re: Solemente]
    #11396644 - 11/06/09 11:17 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

Hey I know a good knock-knock joke!

Somebody say knock-knock and start it off.


--------------------
If you build it they will shrug.
:shrug:


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OfflineSolemente
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Re: One of the best jokes ever.. (Please keep it to one per post..) [Re: Swyfty Swyf]
    #11396650 - 11/06/09 11:18 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

knock knock


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InvisibleSwyfty Swyf
Shrugsy Shrugs


Registered: 02/20/09
Posts: 7,081
Loc: North Alabama
Re: One of the best jokes ever.. (Please keep it to one per post..) [Re: Solemente]
    #11396655 - 11/06/09 11:20 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

Well.......

....who's there?


--------------------
If you build it they will shrug.
:shrug:


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OfflineSolemente
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Re: One of the best jokes ever.. (Please keep it to one per post..) [Re: Swyfty Swyf]
    #11396675 - 11/06/09 11:23 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

Madam


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OfflineAsanteA
flip-flop magician
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Re: One of the best jokes ever.. (Please keep it to one per post..) [Re: Solemente]
    #11396684 - 11/06/09 11:24 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

Madam Knock?


--------------------
CLICK ONE -->  :redpill:  :bluepill:  <-- GO PLACES
SEARCH ENGINE  SUPPORT TICKETS  STORE  SPONSORS/VENDORS  AMANI
PSYCHOSIS, SYNCHRONICITIES, SHAMANISM & THE SUPERNATURAL WA&F

From the Outcasts to the Incrowd, from the Clueless to the Helpful, it takes the whole Shroomery to help a n00b


Edited by Asante (11/06/09 11:25 AM)


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OfflineSolemente
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Re: One of the best jokes ever.. (Please keep it to one per post..) [Re: Asante]
    #11396689 - 11/06/09 11:25 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

Madam foot is caught in the door!

:lol: not great but w/e


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OfflineKada
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Re: One of the best jokes ever.. (Please keep it to one per post..) [Re: Solemente]
    #11396703 - 11/06/09 11:29 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

A Drunk man is stumbling through the woods totally drunk when he comes upon a preacher baptizing people in the river.
He proceeds to walk into the water and subsequently bumps into the preacher.
The preacher turns around and is almost overcome by the smell of alcohol whereupon he asks the drunk
'Are you ready to find Jesus?'
The drunk shouts 'Yes I am!'
So the preacher grabs him and dunks him in the water.
He pulls him up and asks the drunk
'Brother have you found Jesus?'
The drunk replies 'No I haven't found Jesus.'
The preacher shocked at the answer dunks him into the water again for a little longer.
He again pulls him out of the water and asks again 'Have you found Jesus my brother?'
The drunk again answers 'No I haven't found Jesus!'
By this time the preacher is at his wits end and dunks the drunk in the water again -- but this time holds him down for about 30 seconds and when he begins kicking his arms and legs he pulls him up.
The preacher again asks the drunk 'For the love of God have you found Jesus?'

The drunk wipes his eyes and catches his breath and says to the preacher 'Are you sure this is where he fell in?'


--------------------
~The Cultivators Motherload~

"I am free, no matter what rules surround me. If I find them tolerable, I tolerate them; if I find them too obnoxious, I break them.
I am free because I know that I alone am morally responsible for everything I do." -Robert A. Heinlein

"There is no need for temples, no need for complicated philosophies.
My brain and my heart are my temples; my philosophy is kindness."-Dalai Lama

Live long and prosper.



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OfflineKada
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Re: One of the best jokes ever.. (Please keep it to one per post..) [Re: Kada]
    #11396710 - 11/06/09 11:31 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

There were two golfers on the golf course. One of the men pulled out a cigarette, and asked his friend for a light. His friend pulls out a 12 inch Bic lighter.
- "Woah, where did you get such a large Bic?"
- "Oh, my genie got it for me."
- "Your genie? You have a genie? Where is he?"
- "He is in my golf bag."
- "Can I see him?"
So the friend looks in the bag and out comes the genie. The man says to the genie; "I am your master's best friend. Would you grant me just one wish?"
The genie says "yes, just one wish". So the man wishes for a million bucks. The genie goes back in the golf bag without saying a word. Pretty soon, the sky starts to get dark. Then it gets even darker. The man looks up and sees a million ducks. He gets real upset, and says "what is the matter with your genie? Is he hard of hearing? I said a million Bucks, not a million Ducks."
"Do you really think I asked for a 12 inch Bic?"


--------------------
~The Cultivators Motherload~

"I am free, no matter what rules surround me. If I find them tolerable, I tolerate them; if I find them too obnoxious, I break them.
I am free because I know that I alone am morally responsible for everything I do." -Robert A. Heinlein

"There is no need for temples, no need for complicated philosophies.
My brain and my heart are my temples; my philosophy is kindness."-Dalai Lama

Live long and prosper.



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InvisibleSwyfty Swyf
Shrugsy Shrugs


Registered: 02/20/09
Posts: 7,081
Loc: North Alabama
Re: One of the best jokes ever.. (Please keep it to one per post..) [Re: Kada]
    #11396719 - 11/06/09 11:33 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

OK I got a real knock-knock this time.

Knock-knock.


--------------------
If you build it they will shrug.
:shrug:


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OfflineSolemente
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Re: One of the best jokes ever.. (Please keep it to one per post..) [Re: Swyfty Swyf]
    #11396721 - 11/06/09 11:33 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

who's there


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InvisibleSwyfty Swyf
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Registered: 02/20/09
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Loc: North Alabama
Re: One of the best jokes ever.. (Please keep it to one per post..) [Re: Solemente]
    #11396725 - 11/06/09 11:34 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

Bob


--------------------
If you build it they will shrug.
:shrug:


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OfflineSolemente
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Re: One of the best jokes ever.. (Please keep it to one per post..) [Re: Swyfty Swyf]
    #11396727 - 11/06/09 11:35 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

Bob who?


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InvisibleSwyfty Swyf
Shrugsy Shrugs


Registered: 02/20/09
Posts: 7,081
Loc: North Alabama
Re: One of the best jokes ever.. (Please keep it to one per post..) [Re: Solemente]
    #11396733 - 11/06/09 11:36 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

Bob Barker mother fucker, that's who ya punk beyahtch.



Spay and neuter your pets!


--------------------
If you build it they will shrug.
:shrug:


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OfflineSolemente
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Re: One of the best jokes ever.. (Please keep it to one per post..) [Re: Swyfty Swyf]
    #11396734 - 11/06/09 11:37 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

:facepalm:





























:lol::highfive:


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InvisibleSwyfty Swyf
Shrugsy Shrugs


Registered: 02/20/09
Posts: 7,081
Loc: North Alabama
Re: One of the best jokes ever.. (Please keep it to one per post..) [Re: Solemente]
    #11396739 - 11/06/09 11:38 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

:mypleasure:


--------------------
If you build it they will shrug.
:shrug:


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