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I'm addicted to shitty romantic movies because of the feelings they stir up inside of me, and I desperately want to feel that way about someone else.
I've got a mother I don't know who didn't want me, several step mothers who saw me as a hurtle they had to dodge in order to be with my father, and a father that died when I was a teen who treated me like a mistake from his youth. It's like somewhere along the line I couldn't stand to feel unloved anymore so I taught myself not to feel anything at all.
I used to date a lot of girls, and I've had several somewhat long term "committed" relationships, but I can't honestly say that I felt anything for any of them. I know that some of them definitely loved me, and at least one of them expected me to marry her, and as nice as that felt I still didn't really feel anything for any of them.