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Offlinepfxtc
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A Brief Story
    #11354212 - 10/30/09 09:47 PM (8 years, 1 month ago)

This is all a work of fiction, obviously.

Well it's been about 8 months since I last tripped in any way, shape, or form. I had two shroom trips in the month of February and one DMT experience. The first shroom trip started like it always does, complete anxiety, wanted to abort the trip as soon as it started, etc. etc. The trip turned out to actually be THE best of my life. Complete euphoria. Here's the trip report  Moving on. I got cocky and did the same dose except .5g more the next week, which totaled 3.5 grams, not the most I've ever taken, but 3.0 seems to be my threshold or whatever. This trip sent me to hell and back. Here's THAT trip report. And the week after that I sampled DMT for the first time. Took a half-assed hit followed by 2 more, and was scared for my life and said "it'll be over soon" repeatedly. It lasted probably 3 minutes, and in hindsight, wasn't that bad, the only thing that scared me was the extreme body sensations it gives you.

That was in February, it is now October. I have matured in astronomical ways since then. Please take my word for it. I have also not tripped in those 8 months since that mushroom experience. Even thinking about it gave me a panic attack. I've had a bit of DMT saved up though since February and could never get myself too finish it off. I couldn't get past the panic attacks. I developed an anxiety disorder in the last 8 months as well, that has carried on into my real life. I started practicing meditation, and started reading a lot of books about Buddhism, meditation, spirituality, entheogens, and just good classic novels as well. Today I decided I want to attempt to try the DMT. Just the thought of it induced palpitations, sweating, and shaking all throughout my body. I meditated for 20 minutes. I was calm. I pulled the pipe out. Had to meditate again for 5 more minutes. I lit the pipe barely, just to show myself that it was possible. I had to meditate again. I light it barely, inhale for about 3 seconds, and put it down.

What followed was pretty mild, but a fucking landmark in the complexity of my being. I actually managed to overcome this thing that's been panicking me so badly. Immediately after the effects wore off, I picked it up again, and took probably about a 10-15 second inhale of pure vapor, held it until I thought I was gonna explode and violently coughed it all out. Closed my eyes, ready for the ride. Normally at this point, my thoughts would be bouncing all over the place and I would be absolutely losing my mind. I said my mantra once while the effects came on, and I didn't have a single thought for the rest of the experience. I noticed the buzzing, then I noticed the beautiful fractals. My body was completely tense but I think that's normal. I slowly loosened up my body, and as I did, the visuals started to fade away. My eyes were closed the entire time. I actually wished I had inhaled more. This was in no means a breakthrough on DMT, but a breakthrough in my ability to get over this phobia of mine. I couldn't believe that I accomplished such a feat.

I went outside, put on some music, and inhaled again, 2 minutes after the last inhale, and got a mild buzz. I tried it once more, making sure I got everything, and this time I went outside and had my eyes open. Not one thought of negativity or worry. I closed my eyes just to see what was there, and there was a black and red and purple descending spiral into blackness, it was pretty cool. Nothing was wrong. I actually went inside and kind of danced for about 2 minutes because I was so proud of myself.

So in closing, I achieved something very significant in my life today. I love psychedelics, but always get too anxious to even try them anymore. DMT is a great thing, and lasts the perfect amount of time for me. Hopefully I can somehow manage to carry this confidence into other longer lasting things as well, and ultimately carry all these experiences into my everyday life, and combat my pessimistic and anxiety-ridden ways.


--------------------

koods said:
Young male going by the name "Bassfreak" entered Worcester General complaining of a sharp pain in his buttock region after attending EDM event. Attending physician considered a possible diagnosis of acute rave anus, but upon further investigation it was determined there was nothing cute about patient's anus.

Life-long trip report


Edited by pfxtc (10/31/09 12:10 PM)


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Re: A Brief Story [Re: pfxtc]
    #11355233 - 10/31/09 01:37 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

Awesome. I can't wait to try DMT. The time is not right though.


--------------------


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OfflineLucidReality
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Re: A Brief Story [Re: trip forever]
    #11355490 - 10/31/09 02:44 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

I just kinda had a similar experience today. I just made my own dmt and was real nervous to try it, and I just sampled the very last of this pull and got a huge rip and definitely got the most glorious trip with no paranoia. I think my first trip was rough because it was a mix of DMT and 5Meo. This time was super euphoria with some crazy visuals, and I was actually able to talk the whole time. The anxiety can be one of the worst parts of psychedelics, but becoming more acquainted with psychedelics, and your own mind, will help with anxiety. I was too immature to take psychedelics to know, and I have a lot to learn.


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OfflineNature Boy
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Re: A Brief Story [Re: pfxtc]
    #11356074 - 10/31/09 08:44 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

Hello, pfxtc, my friend!

Interesting story.  Sorry to hear about the anxiety attacks.  They can be very debilitating.

W/R/T the DMT - sounds like you found that comfortable middle ground that I've advocated for a long time.  Just so you know, virtually EVERYONE has "pre-flight jitters" when it comes to DMT.  It is a very widely reported phenomena.  Don't let it upset you...you are certainly not alone in that regard.

W/R/T DMT and meditation - the two go together like a hand and glove.  I never do one without the other.  Highly recommended.

I wish you all the best!  :peace:

N.B.


--------------------
All submitted posts under this user name are works of pure fiction or outright lies.  Any information, statement, or assertion contained therein should be considered pure unadulterated bullshit.  Note well:  Sorry, but I do not answer PM's unless you are a long-time trusted friend.  If you have a question, ask it in the appropriate thread.

                                                                               


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Offlinesolstice
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Re: A Brief Story [Re: Nature Boy]
    #11356292 - 10/31/09 10:13 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

I believe it was Aldoux Huxley who said: " Meditation is like feeding yourself and the psychedelic experience is like a feast you should enjoy once in a while " ... or something akin to that.

The sheer amount of meals composing a feast is enough to make any lover of gastronomy lose his or her composure unless he or she explores the wonders of cooking on an everyday basis and develops a methodic and structured way of enjoying every single taste offered by a plate.

If you get my drift...

I went back to meditation lately myself. It had been a while and I wondered why I had stopped altogether. It takes only a couple of days to actually start noticing a difference in your thought patterns. It's like: " whoa! calm down will ya? Let's take this one step at a time. "

I'm a pretty anxious guy myself and I have to deal constantly with the anxiety related to my favorite plants. I plan to make my first DMT extraction during the course of the upcoming winter even though I know I might shit my pants trying it. Of course I will still try it, but a daily practice of meditation cannot do any harm and it might even supply a bit more control in the sphincter area!

Let's not forget we are dealing with unexpected events of the mind here, fellow psychonauts. This is bound to be pretty unsettling and generate a bit of fear.


--------------------
Man woke up in a world he did not understand and that is why he tries to interpret it - Carl Jung


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Offlinepfxtc
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Re: A Brief Story [Re: solstice]
    #11356638 - 10/31/09 12:07 PM (8 years, 1 month ago)

Quote:

Nature Boy said:
Hello, pfxtc, my friend!

Interesting story.  Sorry to hear about the anxiety attacks.  They can be very debilitating.

W/R/T the DMT - sounds like you found that comfortable middle ground that I've advocated for a long time.  Just so you know, virtually EVERYONE has "pre-flight jitters" when it comes to DMT.  It is a very widely reported phenomena.  Don't let it upset you...you are certainly not alone in that regard.

W/R/T DMT and meditation - the two go together like a hand and glove.  I never do one without the other.  Highly recommended.

I wish you all the best!  :peace:

N.B.




Good to hear from you N.B.! I agree, they definitely do go hand in hand, I couldn't have done it without meditation.

Quote:

solstice said:
I believe it was Aldoux Huxley who said: " Meditation is like feeding yourself and the psychedelic experience is like a feast you should enjoy once in a while " ... or something akin to that.

The sheer amount of meals composing a feast is enough to make any lover of gastronomy lose his or her composure unless he or she explores the wonders of cooking on an everyday basis and develops a methodic and structured way of enjoying every single taste offered by a plate.

If you get my drift...

I went back to meditation lately myself. It had been a while and I wondered why I had stopped altogether. It takes only a couple of days to actually start noticing a difference in your thought patterns. It's like: " whoa! calm down will ya? Let's take this one step at a time. "

I'm a pretty anxious guy myself and I have to deal constantly with the anxiety related to my favorite plants. I plan to make my first DMT extraction during the course of the upcoming winter even though I know I might shit my pants trying it. Of course I will still try it, but a daily practice of meditation cannot do any harm and it might even supply a bit more control in the sphincter area!

Let's not forget we are dealing with unexpected events of the mind here, fellow psychonauts. This is bound to be pretty unsettling and generate a bit of fear.




Good quote by Huxley, one of my favorite writers. My problem has always been the pre and coming up stage anxiety, once I'm actually there, I'm fine. :frown:


--------------------

koods said:
Young male going by the name "Bassfreak" entered Worcester General complaining of a sharp pain in his buttock region after attending EDM event. Attending physician considered a possible diagnosis of acute rave anus, but upon further investigation it was determined there was nothing cute about patient's anus.

Life-long trip report


Edited by pfxtc (10/31/09 12:10 PM)


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