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When we are stuck in our wounded self, we need to find a bridge that will open us to learning about love. Meditation is one, so is generosity. What can I give to myself and others? Everything changes when we think 'how and what can i give?' instead of 'how can i get what i want and avoid what i fear?' The moment we decide to give, our heart opens.
The wounded self, however, believes that if we let go of trying to have control, we'll end up feeling very alone. We'll be rejected and there will be nothing left. But the force of love will be there.
If we take a 'leap of faith' our heart will open because of the intent to learn loving.
There are other ways to open our heart, such as:
Music Nature Art Dance Playing Crying Release of anger (alone)