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Ima Trooper
Chilldog Extraordinaire
Registered: 02/21/08
Posts: 13,535
Loc: United States
Last seen: 1 hour, 52 minutes
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So I went out with this chick, right....
#10312591 - 05/09/09 12:09 PM (14 years, 10 months ago) |
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Last night, I went out with this chick I met via myspace. Now let me start off by saying, yes, that sounds lame. But I just moved to a completely different state, I know no one here, I don't have ANY money or a job yet, and I don't have a license or a car. So its a little hard to get out and meet people right now. Ok so now that I'm done justifying my use of myspace, I'll get on with the story.
In my profile, in the "Who I'd like to Meet" section, I specifically state that I'm not interested in meeting stupid people, religious fanatics, or girls who's role model is Paris Hilton. That whole "Valley Gurl" bullshit makes me puke...but I am trying to meet people here, start networking, and I messaged a girl who's profile I must not have read all that well, since apparently she "luvs Paris Hilton". I didn't realize this until later when she messaged me wanting to go out.
That was the first sign that all was not well. The second was when she pulls up, I notice she is MUCH larger than in her pictures...like 40-50lbs larger. But she's not ugly in the face, and I have NOTHING else to do, so I figure fuck it. I'll go out and see what happens.
I have a decent time, but with each drink she seems to have something more wrong with her, her sentences are choppy and don't make a lot of sense sometimes. I think "Maybe its just the alcohol." She at least likes the same music as me, so we have something to talk about.
Fast forward to the end of the night as she's driving me home...we start talking about drugs.
Turns out, she's addicted to crack.
And has spent over seven thousand dollars on crack over the last 6 months. Suddenly the choppy sentences start to make sense.
And she steadily maintains that Cocaine and Crack are not the same drug, even though she knows crack is made from cocaine.
Oh and she knows for a FACT that if you take LSD just once, you are from then on clinically insane, and that its stored in your spinal fluid FOREVER, and that you will NEVER pass a hair follicle drug test if you do it. She even knows a guy who was bowling and slipped and cracked his back and started tripping because he had done LSD once. Also, for some reason she tells me that "drugs are bad", although when I ask her why, she can't think up an answer.
She asks me if I want to go score some crack.
I'm like "No, I've done it a lot before and I'm not really into uppers much anymore." So she drops me off at my house and most likely proceeds to go smoke crack...who knows. LOL I just thought you guys might get a kick out of my night and how fucking stupid people are, and to what extent they will believe the bullshit that is out there.
I'm surprised she doesn't have a friend who thinks he's a glass of orange juice.
-------------------- "Its moving of its own accord...and I like that in a shirt!" - Me, tripping. deCypher said: Schizophrenia beats dining alone, you know.
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k4ge
Registered: 11/25/08
Posts: 1,139
Last seen: 2 years, 5 months
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Re: So I went out with this chick, right.... [Re: Ima Trooper]
#10312602 - 05/09/09 12:11 PM (14 years, 10 months ago) |
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Man I totally had a friend try to convince me he heard of someone that thought he was an orange after taking LSD once.
He then tried to convince me that this Orange man was afraid of his doctors trying to peel him all the time.
-------------------- All posts by this user are not to be taken seriously. Seriously.
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The_Ghost
ゴースト
Registered: 03/27/07
Posts: 15,802
Loc: USG Ishimura
Last seen: 1 year, 1 month
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Re: So I went out with this chick, right.... [Re: Ima Trooper]
#10312605 - 05/09/09 12:12 PM (14 years, 10 months ago) |
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So, d'you exchange numbers?
-------------------- / / / / / / / LISTEN TO MY MUSIC: E X E D / / / / / / / The universe gives no fucks. And takes no fucks. May His Circuits Ever Function
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fee
Im he who is the
Registered: 01/16/03
Posts: 18,238
Loc: amsterdam
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Re: So I went out with this chick, right.... [Re: Ima Trooper]
#10312611 - 05/09/09 12:14 PM (14 years, 10 months ago) |
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that awesome im gonna tell my friends about your wonderful find
-------------------- blankk said to fee: btw you're a total fucking psychedelic pimp Turtletotem said: I want to become a sun worshipper, so next time an atheist smugly asks me where god is, I can point smugly at the sun and laugh my ass off. Then I drive away in my solar powered piece of shit car, cool stuff man. And then I go kill a bitch because the flaming orb in the sky told me to do so, and I don't know, oppress a few minorities here and there in the name of nuclear fusion? Religion is fun.
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Ima Trooper
Chilldog Extraordinaire
Registered: 02/21/08
Posts: 13,535
Loc: United States
Last seen: 1 hour, 52 minutes
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Re: So I went out with this chick, right.... [Re: The_Ghost]
#10312615 - 05/09/09 12:15 PM (14 years, 10 months ago) |
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We did before we went out...something tells me she's not going to call...or that I'm not going to talk to her again. I loathe stupidity, and she's not even hot to try to make up for it.
-------------------- "Its moving of its own accord...and I like that in a shirt!" - Me, tripping. deCypher said: Schizophrenia beats dining alone, you know.
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The_Ghost
ゴースト
Registered: 03/27/07
Posts: 15,802
Loc: USG Ishimura
Last seen: 1 year, 1 month
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Re: So I went out with this chick, right.... [Re: Ima Trooper]
#10312619 - 05/09/09 12:15 PM (14 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Ima Trooper said: I loathe stupidity
-------------------- / / / / / / / LISTEN TO MY MUSIC: E X E D / / / / / / / The universe gives no fucks. And takes no fucks. May His Circuits Ever Function
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Wapakz
1000 Needles
Registered: 11/13/08
Posts: 1,912
Last seen: 14 years, 1 month
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Re: So I went out with this chick, right.... [Re: Ima Trooper]
#10312620 - 05/09/09 12:16 PM (14 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Ima Trooper said:
That was the first sign that all was not well. The second was when she pulls up, I notice she is MUCH larger than in her pictures...like 40-50lbs larger.
http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Fat_girl_angle_shots
Another victim has been claimed.
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Ubitsa
Waiting Is
Registered: 07/20/08
Posts: 575
Loc: Phoenix, AZ
Last seen: 10 years, 4 months
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Re: So I went out with this chick, right.... [Re: The_Ghost]
#10312627 - 05/09/09 12:19 PM (14 years, 10 months ago) |
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Awesome story Sounds like it was worth it just to get a reminder of what sort of people are out there, so you appreciate the next one that much more.
I don't think I could've lasted the night though, props to you.
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Ima Trooper
Chilldog Extraordinaire
Registered: 02/21/08
Posts: 13,535
Loc: United States
Last seen: 1 hour, 52 minutes
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Re: So I went out with this chick, right.... [Re: Wapakz]
#10312635 - 05/09/09 12:21 PM (14 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Wapakz said:
Quote:
Ima Trooper said:
That was the first sign that all was not well. The second was when she pulls up, I notice she is MUCH larger than in her pictures...like 40-50lbs larger.
http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Fat_girl_angle_shots
Another victim has been claimed.
Not even that smart man. She just didn't put up any new pictures with her newly acquired weight.
-------------------- "Its moving of its own accord...and I like that in a shirt!" - Me, tripping. deCypher said: Schizophrenia beats dining alone, you know.
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magikgrl
~Inevitable~
Registered: 02/04/06
Posts: 4,566
Loc: Michigan
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Re: So I went out with this chick, right.... [Re: Ima Trooper]
#10312654 - 05/09/09 12:25 PM (14 years, 10 months ago) |
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damn troop, that sucks.
What state did u move to?
-------------------- "In the 60s people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal...go figure." Becoming human was not part of the plan... I wish I could be as high as my tolerance-danlennon Reality is a crutch for those that can't cope with drugs.
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fungidungi
The magic maker ~,*,~
Registered: 04/30/09
Posts: 660
Loc: Somewhere out there!
Last seen: 14 years, 4 months
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Re: So I went out with this chick, right.... [Re: k4ge]
#10312659 - 05/09/09 12:26 PM (14 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
k4ge said: Man I totally had a friend try to convince me he heard of someone that thought he was an orange after taking LSD once.
He then tried to convince me that this Orange man was afraid of his doctors trying to peel him all the time.
Thats nuts I heard the same story when I was like 15. That was 15 years ago lol. Still going strong I see Here is a link about the story........ http://www.snopes.com/horrors/drugs/orange.asp
-------------------- Today is the same day that tomorrow was yesterday...... -L.W.S [quote]Madtowntripper said: LSD will get you through times of no Wheat Thins better than Wheat Thins will get you through times of no LSD.[/quote]
Edited by fungidungi (05/09/09 12:26 PM)
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shadyy
aHhahhHA
Registered: 09/08/08
Posts: 21,330
Loc: winchestertonfieldville i...
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Re: So I went out with this chick, right.... [Re: Ima Trooper]
#10312663 - 05/09/09 12:27 PM (14 years, 10 months ago) |
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i fucking hate it when ppl think they know what they're talking about but they're just clearly stupid..
that reminds me of my friends uncle..kept trying to tell me about MDMA...and the way he was talking it sounded like he really knew what he was talking about..like he convinced himself he was right
it's fucking pathetic.
-------------------- ga ga ga eets eets how you gone be mad on vacation? MONICA COULDN'T TELL TIME UNTIL SHE WAS 13
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Ima Trooper
Chilldog Extraordinaire
Registered: 02/21/08
Posts: 13,535
Loc: United States
Last seen: 1 hour, 52 minutes
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Re: So I went out with this chick, right.... [Re: magikgrl]
#10312674 - 05/09/09 12:28 PM (14 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
magikgrl said: damn troop, that sucks.
What state did u move to?
Florida...its not a permanent move, thank god. Living at the beach sounds great, until you realize you're 20 miles from the beach, with a bicycle, and its hot as fuck. Plus since you're at the beach, everything is expensive as hell.
-------------------- "Its moving of its own accord...and I like that in a shirt!" - Me, tripping. deCypher said: Schizophrenia beats dining alone, you know.
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k4ge
Registered: 11/25/08
Posts: 1,139
Last seen: 2 years, 5 months
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Re: So I went out with this chick, right.... [Re: fungidungi]
#10312677 - 05/09/09 12:29 PM (14 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
fungidungi said:
Quote:
k4ge said: Man I totally had a friend try to convince me he heard of someone that thought he was an orange after taking LSD once.
He then tried to convince me that this Orange man was afraid of his doctors trying to peel him all the time.
Thats nuts I heard the same story when I was like 15. That was 15 years ago lol. Still going strong I see Here is a link about the story........ http://www.snopes.com/horrors/drugs/orange.asp
Priceless.
-------------------- All posts by this user are not to be taken seriously. Seriously.
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lmfsmoke
Stranger
Registered: 09/18/07
Posts: 765
Loc: SoCal, LA
Last seen: 12 years, 4 months
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Re: So I went out with this chick, right.... [Re: k4ge]
#10312705 - 05/09/09 12:38 PM (14 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
k4ge said: Man I totally had a friend try to convince me he heard of someone that thought he was an orange after taking LSD once.
He then tried to convince me that this Orange man was afraid of his doctors trying to peel him all the time.
Did that guy live in SoCal lol heard the exact same shit
-------------------- Genesis 1:29 - Then God said, "Behold, I have given you every plant yielding seed that is on the surface of all the earth, and every tree which has fruit yielding seed; it shall be food for you"
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Viciousend
Crazy ***hole
Registered: 05/12/08
Posts: 109
Loc: Australia
Last seen: 13 years, 4 months
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Re: So I went out with this chick, right.... [Re: Ima Trooper]
#10312746 - 05/09/09 12:52 PM (14 years, 10 months ago) |
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I don't know if I got a kick out of hearing about your night, I kinda feel sorry for you actually.
-------------------- Is there an indelible line between sanity and insanity? Or do they change, from one into the other, without the slightest provocation? We'll find out that the world itself is insane. I have no fear of death, it just means dreaming in silence, a dream that lasts for eternity.
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Ima Trooper
Chilldog Extraordinaire
Registered: 02/21/08
Posts: 13,535
Loc: United States
Last seen: 1 hour, 52 minutes
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Re: So I went out with this chick, right.... [Re: Viciousend]
#10312757 - 05/09/09 12:55 PM (14 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Viciousend said: I don't know if I got a kick out of hearing about your night, I kinda feel sorry for you actually.
Why's that?
-------------------- "Its moving of its own accord...and I like that in a shirt!" - Me, tripping. deCypher said: Schizophrenia beats dining alone, you know.
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Shroomism
Space Travellin
Registered: 02/13/00
Posts: 66,015
Loc: 9th Dimension
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Re: So I went out with this chick, right.... [Re: Ima Trooper]
#10312820 - 05/09/09 01:10 PM (14 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Ima Trooper said:
Florida
FUCK man have you not heard anything I've said for the past 4 years? FUCK FLORIDA. Pretty much everyone down there is on crack man. Or they beat their wife. Or both. Oh and if you think the crackheads are bad.. stay FAR the fuck away from johnny law.
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Shroomism
Space Travellin
Registered: 02/13/00
Posts: 66,015
Loc: 9th Dimension
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Re: So I went out with this chick, right.... [Re: lmfsmoke]
#10312830 - 05/09/09 01:13 PM (14 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
lmfsmoke said:
Quote:
k4ge said: Man I totally had a friend try to convince me he heard of someone that thought he was an orange after taking LSD once.
He then tried to convince me that this Orange man was afraid of his doctors trying to peel him all the time.
Did that guy live in SoCal lol heard the exact same shit
I've heard this story IRL, about 15 different times. In different states.
Every time the person telling the story knows the person personally. I tell them it's total bullshit, and they get all defensive OH NO WAY MAN IT WAS MY BROTHERS BEST FRIEND AND HE DEFINITELY TURNED INTO A GLASS OF ORANGE JUICE / ORANGE (the story varies..) and they totally believe themselves too. And the people around them do too a lot of the time. It's pretty sad.
It shocked me when I heard this story come from someone I respected and considered pretty damn intelligent too.
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Brugman
antisobrietarian
Registered: 05/16/01
Posts: 15,887
Loc: the land up over
Last seen: 10 years, 11 months
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Re: So I went out with this chick, right.... [Re: Ima Trooper]
#10312869 - 05/09/09 01:23 PM (14 years, 10 months ago) |
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Haha, great story.
Last night I was at the pub. I met TWO fucking people who were convinced mushrooms make your brain bleed. I've heard it so many times I'm almost starting to believe it. They say stuff like "it must make your brain bleed, that's why you hallucinate". That doesn't even make any fucking sense.
Anyone know of any proof that eating magic mushrooms doesn't make your brain bleed?
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